The Shed 16

originally posted by: kaelci
I read that chapter, and read what I have now, and it really is soooo much better now. I feel a bit embarrassed that the original unedited version is up here for all to see. *hides*
(I really love this dialogue though!! I'm rubbish at dialogue, and I'm really really pleased how this turned out)

Rubbish, Fubbish you did very well and dialogue is tricky.
And as for your thoughts of embarrassment concerning your former work. It is an evolving process to write, it is gut wrenching and we all go through it and hopefully we learn from each other and ourselves with proper introspection.
Paint your lovely words, dear.

a reply to: LookingForABetterLife

Blue, I know you wanted to drop your Dad off at the dog pound and all, but you know they won't take him. So...maybe take some of WalkInSilence's advice or the advice of others who try to help. Between you and Wis and your heart problems, I'm going to lock you both up in a castle tower somewhere and make sure you both get the care and rest you need. I am concerned for both of you and I care. Hugs!

a reply to: WalkInSilence

Evening Wis! I mentioned you in my reply to Blue, but you deserve a hug too. so...HUGS!

Lovely to see you!

originally posted by: LucidWarrior

Like right now I'm starting to despair of writing this because I feel like it's stupid or nobodies going to get anything out of it.

Oh my, I must comment. this was the first post I saw when I logged on and I found it so meaningful, so well done. It spoke to my heart and encouraged me to persist in this ever so confusing reality we face.
When you doubt yourself, know you are just on the verge of finding a deeper truth.

originally posted by: WalkInSilence

originally posted by: kaelci
I read that chapter, and read what I have now, and it really is soooo much better now. I feel a bit embarrassed that the original unedited version is up here for all to see. *hides*
(I really love this dialogue though!! I'm rubbish at dialogue, and I'm really really pleased how this turned out)

Rubbish, Fubbish you did very well and dialogue is tricky.
And as for your thoughts of embarrassment concerning your former work. It is an evolving process to write, it is gut wrenching and we all go through it and hopefully we learn from each other and ourselves with proper introspection.
Paint your lovely words, dear.

We really have to do something about that girl and her hiding. She is either hiding in the bushes or hiding her creative writing endeavors. I think she is out back in the bushed giving other folks advice on how to hide. That's because they know we will throw donuts and steak and stuff. I like to shake things up once in a while and throw rocks. It's the shed, they don't hurt, but it gets their attention sometimes.

originally posted by: WalkInSilence

originally posted by: LucidWarrior

Like right now I'm starting to despair of writing this because I feel like it's stupid or nobodies going to get anything out of it.

Oh my, I must comment. this was the first post I saw when I logged on and I found it so meaningful, so well done. It spoke to my heart and encouraged me to persist in this ever so confusing reality we face.
When you doubt yourself, know you are just on the verge of finding a deeper truth.

That was lovely! I happen to be one of his biggest fans!

a reply to: kaelci

As for the bit you live.... I am sorry.
I suffer from anxiety,.. it was crippling at one point. I would refuse to leave the house. I couldn't answer the phone. If I did, I could barely talk and I would stutter a lot. If a friend dragged me out, they had to order things for me because I just couldn't talk to the waiter, or checkout person, or anything.

It's still with me, I don't think Anxiety ever leaves.. but I've managed to shunt it down and get on with things, mostly ignoring the annoying fear lingering in my mind.

I meant to answer this earlier Kaelci. I don't have anxiety bad like you do, mine is more like our Kitty Kat's where we are worry warts or nervous Nellies. It's stressful. Are you on any meds? Just curious, because they do help.

a reply to: LookingForABetterLife

My name for you will always be FoundIt, but yeah you are blue dude too

Wis is right. It may seem underhanded but man you gotta do what it is you gots to.

Hey Wednesday youre going to the doctor for your body, I'll be going to mental health. Make sure to flirt with the cute nurse while you're there nothing wrong with a little flirting but then again I am a Gemini so

Oh and don't forget to ask for balloons! Pretty sure they have to give then to you.

a reply to: Night Star

Hiding. At times perhaps for many years it is beneficial to 'hide', to conceal one self and in that 'tomb'/'womb' find the essence of ourselves with out voices of preconceived concepts forming our selves.
It is, I must admit, a delicate balance, between being a contemplative hermit and a self destructive recluse.
But to retrieve to silence to find one self is at the best beneficial.

a reply to: WalkInSilence


If it is ever silent enough perhaps. If you can slow your thoughts down enough in that silence, then yes. I have found such moments in music. Music is not silent, but can calm the thoughts and feelings that may haunt someone.

Yes, a balance is certainly vital.


I once kept everything inside and it ate away at me. Once I began sharing things with some folks I got the compassion and understanding I so desperately needed.

Ah, life and it's chaos and sacred silence...a balance is in there somewhere.

a reply to: LucidWarrior

I don't get balloons when I go to the doctors. I love balloons! I shall demand balloons at my next appointment. I was supposed to have one next week and the doctor won't be there so I have to re-schedule. Grrrr

a reply to: WalkInSilence

Yes!! When you doubt yourself, when you are hesitant or reluctant, thats when like you said you are on the verge of deeper truth. I was glad I posted that then, because that's exactly what I was doing was pushing through, but it absolutely warns my heart to know that my words can have such an impact on someone. It never gets any less anytime someone tells me they needed to hear what I have to say, and that's why I know I'm a writer.

Star, you may be only one of my biggest fans but you're definitely one of my favorite! I haven't worked on fires in a while but you're the reason it's gotten as far as it is, which, granted isnt saying much but still!

a reply to: Night Star

Aha yes demand balloons! Just glare at em and stomp your feet, amd say "don't test the elf"

a reply to: Night Star

I'm sorry, I'm here! *nudges WIS and giggles*

I keep going to enter responses to threads, and then don't because I just don't have the energy to argue with people. So I write up these huge responses, re-read it all, then I remember that I'm part of the 2% of ATS who feel a certain way about certain things, and most people will only read the first sentence and ignore the rest, so I delete it all and keep to myself.


Talking to Mr Bass at the moment and waiting for a knock at the door. I have a bulk-load of freezable/microwavable containers arriving today at some point!

As for my anxiety.. I'm not on medication.. I am a lot better now than what I was, through working on things myself. Making myself do things. Becoming aware that I CAN do this, and this, and that. A lot of it was because I had my son and I needed to become an adult and stop relying on everyone else.

My main anxieties now are mainly slight social anxiety where I fear what people think of me (which I know doesn't even matter, but, you know) and just typical worries... I'm on a strict budget at the moment, and last week my son's daycare asked me for a whole $2.50 so he could go on a small excursion in a couple of weeks, and looked at me funny because I actually had to work out if I could afford $2.50. That weird look, that stayed in my mind for days. And more recently - I was on the verge of a panic attack last night, crying and near-hyperventilating in the shower, because I was worried about Bass's plane crashing into the ocean on the way here, and he's not even coming here for a couple months yet! (I wonder what I'll be like when he actually IS flying here! LOL. Terrible.)

And I'm sorry, I'm doing that rambling novel thing again.
Pixie-Fairy Magic Time!

originally posted by: LucidWarrior
a reply to: Night Star

Aha yes demand balloons! Just glare at em and stomp your feet, amd say "don't test the elf"

LOL! I usually say, "Don't mess with the Elf!

a reply to: kaelci

There was a time when I didn't have fifty cents for a second hand book I wanted, so I understand the stress of being so broke.

Tell you what, the day that Bass is flying over to be with you, step away from the bushes and come and be in here! If you don't, I'll go drag your butt in here, or maybe just send PM's if that makes you feel better. OK? Deal? I mean it! Much love and a big warm hug!

a reply to: Night Star

Thank you night star for taking care of my kaelci.

I give you big hugs

a reply to: Night Star

Well yeah but they aren't messing with you just testing your patience

originally posted by: BASSPLYR
a reply to: Night Star

Thank you night star for taking care of my kaelci.

I give you big hugs

Awwww! Hello Dave! Don't worry, I'll be watching over you too. I'll be sending some enchanted friends to carry you safely over. I know how much this means to both of you and how magical and amazing it will be to finally be together. Now there's a story to write! Hint, hint to Kaelci, unless Dave wants to write it.

Ooops, forget to leave a hug.

originally posted by: LucidWarrior
a reply to: Night Star

Well yeah but they aren't messing with you just testing your patience

I have patience? Looks around for this elusive thing called patience.