Girlfriend wants to leave me

Do not call her, don't talk to her, after a few months she might give you a call, just tell her you're busy and you'll call her back in 10 minutes, but don't call her back. Do that a few times, the more she realizes you've moved on, the more she will want you back.

Don't expect a miracle though, but this strategy tends to work more times than not.

a reply to: ColaTesla

Might work actually

a reply to: grainofsand

Lol, plenty of exs I'm friends with. One left me and I only got angry and thank god I realized immediately that was not one I should have gone more than a few dates to begin with. This one is going to be another friend though obviously I would like to try to break the friend zone again, maybe once the medicine I'm currently taking stops messing my sleep habits (bad for one with general anxiety disorder) and lets me drink alcohol again. (2 months of that crap lol)

Why do you need the alcohol friend? If you don't mind my asking.
a reply to: misterhistory

originally posted by: misterhistory
a reply to: ColaTesla

Might work actually

a reply to: grainofsand

Lol, plenty of exs I'm friends with. One left me and I only got angry and thank god I realized immediately that was not one I should have gone more than a few dates to begin with. This one is going to be another friend though obviously I would like to try to break the friend zone again, maybe once the medicine I'm currently taking stops messing my sleep habits (bad for one with general anxiety disorder) and lets me drink alcohol again. (2 months of that crap lol)

why not just give up alcohol then, it does no good for you what so ever anyways! I gave it up over 10 years ago, not because I'm a bad drunk, or alcoholic, but it does no good for you in general....

a reply to: BELIEVERpriest

She doesn't want me to change lol. That's weird, also I think she's letting me borrow a few of her online accounts and using one of mine

originally posted by: misterhistory
. She's saying it's because she's not been giving it her all, but if what she had done over the past couple of months isn't her all, then I want to try to get it instead of lose all of it.

This right here, really felt genuine, and I hope you can win her back. You can't force someone to love you, but you can certainly show them why they should.

I wish I had some advice, but as a woman, all I can say is, most of us are crazy good luck.

-Alee

Tao Of Steve:
1) Eliminate your desire ("Women can smell an agenda.")
2) Do something excellent in her presence
3)"We pursue that which retreats from us"--Martin Heidegger (Retreat)

originally posted by: grainofsand
a reply to: schuyler

Why not just be friends?
Two of my most trusted friends are ex deep love's, and I'm friends with every ex gf.
Get over the break and grow up I say if no party has done anything nasty and horrible.

Because the "Friend Zone" is a recipe for disaster. There are expectations and always the possibility in the back of your mind that she will "see the light" and you will be able to "get back together." That puts her in control. The fact is, if she dumped you once, then she'll dump you again.

a reply to: CulturalResilience

Alcohol is my friend, it's good to me. It comes in all so many different flavors. I want to try them all, I can't drink them constantly or a lot in one go but oh my do I like the experience each offers. The medicine I'm currently on messes with my liver so I cannot drink even one shot.

a reply to: schuyler

I broke out of the friend zone to be in the relationship in the first place haha. So I call bs on that stuff.

Who's talking about getting back together?
I enjoy no strings sex with girls in my friend zone, maybe you have a different idea of friend zones?

reply to: schuyler

Here, this guy's got the right idea: www.abovetopsecret.com...

Get yourself a few Eastern European ladies.
Wide hips for good birthin'...and they're incredibly grateful when you feed them.

a reply to: IAMTAT

Lame stereotype.

a reply to: grainofsand

That and I don't want kids lol. 28 and I get upset about my lego creations break up. How do you think I'll be about a kid peeing in my face. And just go looking at another thread I've started about a coworker and tell me what I'm there says I'm father material.

a reply to: misterhistory

Gosh I'm only a decade and a bit older than you and I have an adult son lol
I never wanted a second child though so one relationship of mine died instantly in a casual conversation once:

Oh no, I don't want another child

Really? Because that could be a problem

I have two options and I'm choosing telling you the truth

...We split that night, both sad because nobody had done anything wrong...travelled Asia with her, and she's happy raising her little one with her man now.
We never stopped loving each other though just accepted new reality

originally posted by: misterhistory
a reply to: schuyler

I broke out of the friend zone to be in the relationship in the first place haha. So I call bs on that stuff.

Yet here you are whining that she dumped you. I think your reported experience is proof enough.

originally posted by: grainofsand
Who's talking about getting back together? I enjoy no strings sex with girls in my friend zone, maybe you have a different idea of friend zones?

The OP is. It's his thread. Yes, I have a much different definition of the "Friends Zone." You're talking about "Friends with Benefits." It sounds like a brag to me. I would suggest my understanding of the Friends Zoneis much more prevalent and accepted than yours.

originally posted by: misterhistory
Okay, I met someone of the kind that one can't believe you're theirs. Obviously with the title I have I'm not her's currently as of the past two days. Looking for advice on any way I could convince her to stay with me. She's saying it's because she's not been giving it her all, but if what she had done over the past couple of months isn't her all, then I want to try to get it instead of lose all of it.

Do you think, perhaps, 'not giving it her all' is not only an excuse/reason but, more telling in that she wasn't really committed in the first place? If one has a goal or deep love for something in their life then wouldn't it make sense that they would pursue it with a vigor and intensity? A passion?

If you need more details to help answer my quest. Feel free to ask, though anything about messages sent between me and her are probably going to have to go through pm if I even feel it's appropriate. Thanks if you can help, don't just say I'm screwed and a looser, the messages between me and here are so freakishly similar to when I dumped my ex fiancée so I already know how bad the situation is.

Not to read too much into it but, the word 'dumped' is telling, IMO.
So, think back to why you 'dumped' your ex-fiance and was there any hope in that situation? Could they have done something to have changed your mind and made you want to stay? Were you 'giving it your all' ?

Good luck to you and her.

a reply to: schuyler
Who's in a pissing match?
I was just being honest about my situation. ...unfortunate if you think that is bragging, it may hamper discussion between us.

a reply to: misterhistory

These questions are best answered from the ladies here on ATS. They are all really great and easy to talk to about almost anything (and then some).

But from a guys standpoint...I think moving on is what you should do. If its meant to be? Things will work out...in spite of the current situation...or not.

Lady-ATS'rs? Give this brother some help! Thanks!

a reply to: misterhistory

let her go.. let her go, let her go, let her go