The Downsides of Being Beautiful

originally posted by: rukia
And I blame evil, not people.

You've had your beauty confirmed by seemingly independent by-standers, but you're not doing much to confirm your case that you also possess intelligence by making statements like that.

Today the mirror gazed into me.

a reply to: rukia
Well I gave you a star. But I don't get it?

Are you saying there will be no walk off?

If there is no walk off how will we know who is beautiful and who not? Are we just supposed to take peoples word for it? Dont be ridiculous, most especially since the concept and word means so many different things to so many different people.

We should pick some judges, and get this competition going. Maybe you all can post individual walk off on youtube, then the competitors would post theirs as well, then people can judge on just who is the mostest beautiful. Till then, sounds like a bunch of hot air over nothing.

I stipulate to vote if we should move this thread to the hoax section.

a reply to: Timely

Beauty is only skin deep, whereas ugly goes right to the bone ...

And conversely, the opposite is also true just the same. People put far too much emphasis on physical traits.

a reply to: tigertatzen

I have to be physically attracted to a woman to sleep with her much less marry her and procreate, if that's shallow so be it, but that's my preference and I do not believe there is anything wrong with that.

Having said that, of course I want a smart, passionate, caring, sweet, and kind woman. But I do not think these are mutually exclusive and to act like they are, is exactly what the OP is talking about.

a reply to: teapot

All personal preferences aside, beauty is resonant with the golden ratio, 1/1.618. This applies to everything, people, trees, art. Fibonnaci was onto something, as were the ancient Hindu. Artists have exploited GR; for example, the Mona Lisa uses GR. As to the social issues faced by those deemed beautiful, I think this may be about ego and how easily it is bruised by anything perceived 'superior'. Anyone being 'mean' to a beauty, really is jealous but also trying to establish their own attributes and if this is not possible, to actually work to undermine or even destroy the reputation of the beauty. When I saw an unattractive female colleague insulting the achievements of another, more attractive woman, all I really saw was ugliness in the soul of the attacker. Backfired for her because the pretty one had done a good job and in such a way that it was not really possible for anyone to claim credit for it.

That was precisely how I perceived the topic of the OP, the measurement of Phi, the Golden Ratio. I don't get how it degenerated into this, but I actually am totally fascinated by the entire thing. The psychology of it too, how it affects us on a subconscious level.

a reply to: TechniXcality

a reply to: tigertatzen I have to be physically attracted to a woman to sleep with her much less marry her and procreate, if that's shallow so be it, but that's my preference and I do not believe there is anything wrong with that. Having said that, of course I want a smart, passionate, caring, sweet, and kind woman. But I do not think these are mutually exclusive and to act like they are, is exactly what the OP is talking about.

I don't think it's shallow at all...it's hard-wired into our DNA to seek out those whom we are physically attracted to for potential mates. We'd never reproduce if we were forced to mate with people who don't turn our crank, now would we? That is part of what the source article is talking about.

I'm not sure where you're going with this, but you seem to be under the impression that I think intelligence and physiological/anatomical symmetry are mutually exclusive, when what I actually said was the complete opposite of that: From a personal, real-life experience kind of standpoint, I find it interesting that (according to the OP article) higher intelligence is actually more common in people with symmetrically "beautiful" facial features, because I have those facial measurements and though I have a very high IQ and do not give much thought to my physical appearance, I am typically stereotyped as being stupid or mentally deficient somehow simply because I look a certain way, just as my "plainer" friends tend to be taken more seriously at face value.

To put it even more plainly, the prevalence of this erroneous assumption is such in my life that I could quite literally get whatever I wanted, if I were that kind of girl. I'm not bragging, either, simply stating a fact. However, I know many other women who do it. And yes, they are stunningly beautiful on the outside...but taking advantage of it and harming other people in the process makes them nothing but ugly.

I don't care much about being pretty, personally. I think people expect more of you. Expect the exact same perceived "perfection" of you that matches the packaging. Make you out to be something that you're not, and even worse, hold other people to that overblown standard. Yet, they don't really want to know the real you. The real you is a disappointment. I refused to model for that very reason. Beauty is not something that should define us, no matter what standard we believe should be followed. And no one ratio or equation or perfection in measurement should define human beauty. But I believe the OP was talking about the beauty of symmetry, in this case physical appearance. It's a fascinating subject.

a reply to: galadofwarthethird

What are you talking about?

What I spoke about are facts. Google--use it. I provided one source. If you want more, go and get them. They are out there, aplenty. There have been studies done. Facial symmetry is used to determined beauty. And beauty as determined by facial symmetry correlates with intelligence. What do you not understand? There's nothing to debunk.

What's a hoax about any of this? Did you even read the OP?
lol it's such a hoax that ATS featured the thread on their facebook page. oh, however could that be?

#DENYIGNORANCE THAT'S HOW

a reply to: tigertatzen

no. "according to the OP" my grass. according to studies and FACTS. I have done prior research. But the thread isn't about that intelligence correlation at all. That was just an exterior thing I thought to add in because it's true and because people like to think that pretty people are stupid when they're not. This thread's topic was not that. it was how people react automatically with evil and hatred at what they can't have. and how that's really sad. It's also about what the article talked about. But that was mostly an excuse for me to be able to display the phenomena I spoke of within the thread itself. if you haven't noticed, it's VERY IRONIC what's been happening in this thread.

Anyway, I doubt these stunningly beautiful people you know are actually stunningly beautiful. Just saying. But you seem awfully happy to rag on these people--what about you? Are you perfect? Don't you think that you're being kinda mean? Right? Jealousy isn't nice. You really should realize it and stop. Everyone should. But you won't until you stop trying to be someone you're not.

a reply to: galadofwarthethird

If there is no walk off how will we know who is beautiful and who not? Are we just supposed to take peoples word for it? Dont be ridiculous, most especially since the concept and word means so many different things to so many different people. We should pick some judges, and get this competition going. Maybe you all can post individual walk off on youtube, then the competitors would post theirs as well, then people can judge on just who is the mostest beautiful. Till then, sounds like a bunch of hot air over nothing. I stipulate to vote if we should move this thread to the hoax section.

Are you trying to assert that the OP article was a proven hoax somehow? That the research is not sound in some way? Perhaps you might consider acquainting yourself with the definition of the word "hoax", because it appears that you were asleep during that vocabulary lesson. She was attempting to discuss scientific correlation as evidenced by the source article with the actual human feedback on it, not start some inane argument over whose standard of beauty is more valid than another's.

No one wants a "competition". That's the point. I stipulate to vote if we should move you back to kindergarten so you can learn shapes and colors before you move on to the hard things, like words.

a reply to: tigertatzen

Thank you.

Exactly. I was actually not looking to talk about that fact, though. I was looking to talk about people's reactions to beautiful people. And expose the truth. That's what I'm looking for.

And to help younger people who might be in a similar position to mine understand the truth--especially if their parents didn't tell them like mine did. You end up blaming yourself for others' jealousy. So you have to grow a pair and realize that it's not that you're doing anything bad, and it's not that they're bad, either--it's that they can't help themselves but to feel jealous. And that jealousy makes them hate you.

That's why they're crying HOAX and denying it. They don't want to admit that they're the ones who fall victim to jealousy and lash out. They don't want to see it. So they deny it. And that helps them not feel so sad. It's awful. They're hurting themselves. People need to be proud of who they are. Regardless of what they look like or what they can do. And be happy for others who have nice things--things that they may want and cannot have for whatever reason. But that's not going to happen. Because people don't work that way. The truth hurts, unfortunately. I don't think that anything can really be done about it other than talk about it. Which is why I'm doing this, I guess.

a reply to: rukia

I don't care what people think about me for sharing this I was told the other day by a somewhat attractive friend that she has liked me for a long time, and without my knowledge. I asked her why she never said anything not even complimenting, and she said I am very attractive and that I "know" I am, and therefor she did not want my head to get any bigger. It's kind of a strange logic, because honestly i have never sat there and espoused these things; these are assumptions. Anyway it's an anecdote but I think it fits.

a reply to: TechniXcality

YES. My mother and I have talked about this kind of thing! That's why really really pretty people (if they're not famous) don't get a lot of likes on facebook and stuff from what I've noticed. On the pictures. It's like nobody wants to tell them they're beautiful--because they don't want their heads to get any bigger...but then they go on the ugly person's wall and lie and call them beautiful and gorgeous. It's screwed up.

Why lie? To make people feel better? That's messed up and wrong. It just ends up inflating their heads because they're NOT beautiful. You can't inflate a beautiful person's head because beauty is something we take for granted. it's not something we desire because we have it. we don't want more of it. if you call us beautiful, it's just like oh, thank you that's nice of you. and then that's it. it's not like I don't have eyes. I'm not going to all of a sudden be like OMG YEAH YOU'RE RIGHT I SO AM HOLY JUMPING JEHOSEPHATS LOOK AT ME SO WITTY AND PRETTY AND BRIGHT I DESERVE A STATUE TO BE MADE OUT OF ME OR SOMETHING lol i don't even know. I can't even think like that xD

a reply to: rukia

I find a facebook "friend" the most beautiful person on earth. She hates me though. Any future hope is what's known as the ticket to despair and hell. I wish I'd have never met her... is that part of the curse for being beautiful? Or is the curse a part of having stupid, fat, and ugly people like you?!

a reply to: rukia

a reply to: tigertatzen no. "according to the OP" my grass. according to studies and FACTS. I have done prior research. But the thread isn't about that intelligence correlation at all. That was just an exterior thing I thought to add in because it's true and because people like to think that pretty people are stupid when they're not. This thread's topic was not that. it was how people react automatically with evil and hatred at what they can't have. and how that's really sad. It's also about what the article talked about. But that was mostly an excuse for me to be able to display the phenomena I spoke of within the thread itself. if you haven't noticed, it's VERY IRONIC what's been happening in this thread. Anyway, I doubt these stunningly beautiful people you know are actually stunningly beautiful. Just saying. But you seem awfully happy to rag on these people--what about you? Are you perfect? Don't you think that you're being kinda mean? Right? Jealousy isn't nice. You really should realize it and stop. Everyone should. But you won't until you stop trying to be someone you're no

First of all, I'm actually defending you here. So I have no idea why you turned the douche nozzle on full blast in my direction, but kindly stop it. You are making an enemy where you previously did not have one and I am not deserving of the venom and judgemental hatred you are spitting at me.

no. "according to the OP" my grass

Your grass? At what point have we been discussing your grass??

And you ARE the Original Poster, are you not? And if so, does that not make you the OP? And anything responding to your Original Post by you, the Original Poster would be considered to be "according to the OP", would it not? Wtf is your problem?

I haven't "ragged" on anyone. I have simply stated a fact: I personally know other women whom I personally consider to be stunningly gorgeous physically (since I have stated repeatedly that perceived beauty is completely subjective, it really matters not a whit whether you doubt it or not) use the natural advantage of their physical appearance to manipulate other people into getting what they want, and I think that is not only reprehensible behavior, it also makes other genetically blessed women who are not opportunistic like that look bad, and that is how ridiculous stereotypes are born.

I'm not "jealous" or "being mean". I'm being factual. I've known these women for years, and they knowingly use their looks to get men to buy them things and such. That's the way they were raised and they're never going to change. I think it's mean and dishonest to manipulate people in such a way and they know I feel this way about their behavior, but they think I'm weird because I hate makeup and don't own a dress. Are they jealous of me because they disagree with my lack of makeup and frilly clothing? Sure they are, just about as jealous as I am of them sleeping with multiple men whom they do not even know nor care about so that they'll have Coach bags and get new acrylic nails every week. Give me a break. It's their lifestyle, and they're welcome to it. I think it's silly.

I also responded directly to you at the beginning of the thread and told you that I agree with you about people with that "symmetrical beauty" being treated differently, and also defended you to another member who very rudely told you that you were full of it. Maybe if you'd been reading over your own thread instead of zapping out unnecessary, completely off-base and uncalled-for, rude and vicious replies to people who were genuinely interested in what you had to say before you bit their head off, you'd have seen that.

a reply to: tigertatzen
Is it physical appearance that you find more important or psychological appearance?

a reply to: EternalSolace

But is she actually beautiful? Like symmetrical?

Who you find beautiful is subjective. She might not be all that great a looker, but to you she might be. That's not the kind of beauty I'm talking about here.

I'm talking about facial symmetry--which is how beauty is determined. And beautiful people--highly symmetrical people--aren't very common. At all. The vast majority of people aren't symmetrical at all.

I think you're just salty because she doesn't like you. I bet she didn't do anything mean to you at all.

Did you just call me fat, ugly, and stupid? Oh boo hoo hoo. Meanie No wonder she doesn't like you.

a reply to: EternalSolace

HAHA are you asking that question? Did you read any of her posts? Probably not.

What do you know of inner beauty? What with your aggressive and delusional insults toward me and all. You're not really blessed in that department, are you? Stop looking for a fight. You're transferring your anger at that girl you liked onto me. Stahp plz.

originally posted by: rukia
a reply to: EternalSolace

But is she actually beautiful? Like symmetrical?

I dont know. Like you said, it's about symmetry. For me, she's perfect. To her, I'm garbage. Who is to say who's right?

a reply to: EternalSolace

You didn't read my OP did you?

Okay.

Anyway, so what if to you she's perfect. She doesn't like you. Sorry. It's okay. You have to move on, otherwise that's creepy. I'm sorry she wasn't nice about saying she didn't like you. She should have been. She should have said thank you for the flattery but no thank you to the affection. And that's that. You need to forgive her.

Because it looks like she's not the girl for you. And somewhere out there there is. And some girl will love that you think she's perfect. Find that girl--or let her find you. Don't worry about it. Just be yourself.