Im sorry

a reply to: dukeofjive696969

Wow.

I felt that one right in the chest.

I went through a divorce that caused almost the exact feelings you are describing in your poetry.
3 kids who suddenly did not have their dad anymore,
and not by dad's choice.

It broke my heart, and I was never the same again.

s&f

It does get better.

a reply to: dukeofjive696969

Always take the high road, eat crow if you have to, out of love for you child.

Be the better parent, but don't be a doormat.

Never disenfranchise the other parent, kids aren't stupid and they love you both the same.

When the other party tries to enrage you, think about what is best for your children, end of story.

If the other parent is childish, immature, and selfish................don't react the same way.

If you have a hard time dealing with everything......Pretend, in the beginning, you are the rock of Gibraltar, because in time you will be.

Don't apologize to your children ( even though you feel that way inside), they won't understand, just love them, and spend time with them that's all they want.

If you focus on your children and treat your the relationship with your ex like a professional business deal things will go smoother.

After time you will see things getting better, and that you laid a strong foundation, your children will see this and respect your strength forever.


Love,

RT

a reply to: dukeofjive696969

I'd give you a hug tighter than the air you breathe; but there is one that will hold you together if you let Him. Time is the true test of every character and though dedication and integrity, every child, deep in their heart will always search for their dad. Even as I did for 20 years, and found Him.

A plighted father of 2 daughters, reunited by the light of truth.

a reply to: dukeofjive696969

I feel you man, in exactly the same place... Nothing worse, breaks my heart everyday... I never wanted this for my kids ever. Can't eat some days, just empty inside... So quiet and lifeless without them.

I'm also sorry...

Times a healer they say

I'm in the same situation here. I don't get to see my little ones due to my ex and the "church". I have very hard days and then less hard days. I keep believing that some how some way things will work as long as I hold on. Honestly, I don't feel any better. It's a struggle everyday. My soul tells me it will be worth it in the end. I don't think there's any other way to look at it. Maintain my friend. You are not alone in this.

originally posted by: dukeofjive696969
Im sorry papa isint home anymore.

Im sorry papa has to work for xmas.

Im sorry papa and maman dont love each other anymore

Im sorry papa cant be there when you sad.

Im sorry i cant be there when your sick.

Im sorry im not a better papa.

Im sorry i cant get you the things you want.

Im sorry i cant take you to father daughter danse.

Im sorry i cant take you camping.

Im sorry you have me as a papa

Im sorry but i loved you since the day you where born.

It hurts me not to see you everyday.

But i have to be strong, thats what they keep on telling me.

Oh and im sorry for my rant.


Je vous aime beaucoup de papa.

I feel you brother. Thank you for posting this. I have struggles with making visitation work with my five year old son and not getting to see him all of the time. Your post made me realize there are other people out there in the same boat.

originally posted by: Illusionarius27
I'm in the same situation here. I don't get to see my little ones due to my ex and the "church". I have very hard days and then less hard days. I keep believing that some how some way things will work as long as I hold on. Honestly, I don't feel any better. It's a struggle everyday. My soul tells me it will be worth it in the end. I don't think there's any other way to look at it. Maintain my friend. You are not alone in this.

Why does the church mean you can't see your kids?

Is your ex not letting you see them?

originally posted by: Darkblade71
a reply to: dukeofjive696969

Wow.

I felt that one right in the chest.

I went through a divorce that caused almost the exact feelings you are describing in your poetry.
3 kids who suddenly did not have their dad anymore,
and not by dad's choice.

It broke my heart, and I was never the same again.

s&f

It does get better.

I am sorry to hear that my friend. I know somewhat how you feel because I went and am going through something similar. Although we weren't married, my ex and I have a 5 year old son. She moved back home to PA after we broke up. He doesn't get to see me that often because of that fact, and I didn't choose the situation. But it breaks my heart knowing he wants to see me more.

originally posted by: Hefficide
a reply to: dukeofjive696969

When my daughter was five months old her mother disappeared one night. We'd just moved from Texas to Georgia ( from her home state to mine ) and I came home from a family function to find everything and everyone gone.

I spent a long time trying to track her mother down online and through the addresses and phone numbers I had from having previously lived in Texas ( I knew she'd returned home, to her mothers house ). But that got me nowhere.

Fast forward fifteen years - just a few months ago. I got a friends request on FB from my daughter. Out of the blue. I'd scoured FB for her so many times I could not put a number on it and never found anything. As my daughter explained her mother made her wait until she was sixteen ( in this case she allowed it a month early ) before she could have a FB. She immediately found me and now we speak very often.

I waited a long time to her my baby girl say "I love you Dad". In the end, the wait was worth it.

So keep the faith. Right now is not forever and things can and will change. Hold onto it like a candle and never let it go. You keep the light burning and she will find you.

Wow, that is intense brother. I am glad for you that you were able to connect with your daughter. Are you two going to meet up?

I feel like society only talks about the men who walk out on women and families, not the other way around. My ex, while pregnant with my child, took off from Arizona where we lived to Pennsylvania where her family was. It set in motion the last 5 years of hardship for all of us, as my kid doesn't see me often. I ultimately had to move to the East Coast so he could see me at least several times a month. So here I am now.

a reply to: Quetzalcoatl14

She and I are defnitely going to meet. I've got a bit more of a fight with the disability people to engage in ( it's a very long story ) - but once that is finished, I plan to head to Texas to be nearer to her. I don't know if I'll pick up a six month lease and build bridges or end up staying ( I lived there before and did not like the Dallas area ). But I am definitely headed that way.

originally posted by: Hefficide
a reply to: Quetzalcoatl14

She and I are defnitely going to meet. I've got a bit more of a fight with the disability people to engage in ( it's a very long story ) - but once that is finished, I plan to head to Texas to be nearer to her. I don't know if I'll pick up a six month lease and build bridges or end up staying ( I lived there before and did not like the Dallas area ). But I am definitely headed that way.

Good luck my friend. Hope it all works out. I know that unless I had moved closer it would have been hard to have a solid relationship with my kid. Sounds like you have a similar situation.