Seriously? I need to learn to avoid editorials, a 5th year of high school?

Thanks, I see you failed to read my post and went on your own little counter-rant, that's fine, Im not going to join this party thought, it wont lead to anything


I beg of you to teach me how to change myself, when the past 8 years of counselling have failed me.

You were beaten as a child? I'm so glad you got over that.

I never did. But hey, you think you know you were in the same situation as me, so that's fine. At least you managed to escape. I didnt lived with them till last year and emotionally I'm as stable as a 16yo girl. But I guess I'm an idiot for not just toughening up, right...

You have, again, showcased your total lack of understanding when it comes to psychology and the human mind.

You fail to see that humans can be programmed to believe anything, and if done properly, will believe it most of their lives.

Where you fail most though, is in showing others you understand them. You simply want to enrage them, which is fine, but will never work.

Want me to be honest? Yeah you pissed me off, by making me feel the same way my parents have made me feel my entire life. You think pissing me off makes me want to change? I CANT CHANGE, SO INSTEAD YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE PUNCHING YOU IN THE NOSE. Apologies for the insult but you're an ass for even thinking for one second that THAT attitude is going to help anyone with real problems. You even make me doubt your entire story, people who were abused are also usually rather empathic, unless in the extreme opposite cases they show sociopathic or psychopathic tendencies of course. Whatever your case, you make it obvious you came out of it fine, which indicates you're still putting on a mask OR had a stable mind to begin with, in which case you seriously have no place telling me how wrong I am for being unable to fix myself.


If you think psych meds exist because some people just dont want to change hard enough, like you, you should be one them too.






If you are so strong mentally and emotionally, I'm envious of you, but I'm not, as you see...




What stood out from your post, is that you claim it took you DECADES to change your mind. Well then allow me to call you a hypocrite for acting like it should only take the snapping of ones fingers in anyone else's case

So which is it then? Decades would mean at least from age 10 to 30 or over, so why can you insult me when I'm (according to you) in a similar situation as you were?

Captain hindsight is at it, so it seems. Maybe reflect a bit on YOUR earlier years if ANYTHING you just typed is even remotely true, because it seems that over the years, you have also lost your sense of empathy. If this kind of post you wrote would've helped your earlier self, you truly are a special individual but I doubt you ever had any real problems either then.

(Sorry op for using your thread as a soundboard of my frustrations.)

Edit: i know I'm taking this wayyyyy too personal, I even agree in a way, but you have no clue how many children suffer invisible abuse they will NEVER get over if you uphold this attitude, because for 26 y your judgement stuck to me and I felt ashamed most of my life. Which would explain why I take it personal, as I've felt like a loser since I could first think.


So, thanks for implying I'm a loser who's not making anything of his life besides complaining and asking for sympathy.


If I would want sympathy I'd be a sob in real life too, WHICH i'M NOT. Thankfully theres the internet to explore ideas and feelings and I'll freely continue doing so no matter how much you think you have me figured out


Actually, your post did help me! It helped me realise most people have no clue and so I shouldnt bother with their opinions either.

You, obviously have no clue


This year I moved out on my own, I started my own business, I'm in art and design and am finally making a living for myself.


I'll even share my biggest shame with you, I'm 26 and never had a fulltime job.



And now that I'm finally getting on with my life, realising how much damage was done, but also how much can be repaired ON MY OWN, its just shocking to read an ignorant reply like yours, even the one I replied to first, because you showcase a lack of understanding, which is exactly what my heaviest burden is.



i've been abused my entire life, physically till they couldnt handle it anymore and switched to intensified verbal and emotional abuse ever since, till I was 25.


You are an idiot for even thinking that I could just go out and get friends or whatever it is you suggest.

But lets just repeat one more thing
What stood out from your post, is that you claim it took you DECADES to change your mind. Well then allow me to call you a hypocrite for acting like it should only take the snapping of ones fingers in anyone else's case

Your post is as perverted to me as it would be telling the victim of the Austrian child molester that she should have just fled the basement. DISGUSTING.

a reply to: NoNameNeeded

Oh, yes.
I did read your post.

Yes.
It's still you and your life, so it's still your responsibility. Your fault? Don't know. Own it, or it owns you.

You called me a liar.
You are incorrect.
If I were lying you could just dismiss me and go on with your day.

You've been beat?
Think you are special?
Join the club.
I've been through plenty.
Knew kids that had it worse but not many.

I still don't really see any reason to give you any sympathy or have any empathy.
You are the one who needed to vent your spleen about your personal specialized case.
I do understand that venting sometimes helps.
So let's be special.

No amount of empathy, sympathy or understanding ever helped me because I hated myself so much.
That's what my childhood taught me, to hate myself like nothing else in the world.

You say times change?
Times don't change.
That's still the key function of society. To sow self hate. Society excels at making people hate themselves. Always have.

Unfortunately, now they also teach entitlement along with self pity.
Now that's pure evil.
It's how they drag down the ones who got life figured out and grew up.
Bunch of zombies dragging down what's left of the living.
Gimme, gimme, gimme.....

So, empathy?
Screw empathy.
Empathy is for widows,orphans, the terminally ill and lost freaking causes.
It just enables self pity
and self pity is home grown poison.

When someone looks at you and says, "There,there. It'll be alright. You poor thing..."
They've already given you up for lost. Written you off.
The last thing anybody should ask for is for someone to "understand" them.
The day they understand you is the day they own you.
And people want it so bad.

I figured out way too late how to get myself straight
I had to forgive them all... and had to mean it.
That was worse than every beating I ever got. Giving up my pride.
Then I had to forgive my self. Much, much harder to do.

Once I did it, I realized what an idiot I had been.
I did all of the worst stuff to myself. Once I figured it out, I realized it was my decision all along to be miserable.

Dragging all that hate and misery around is a choice we make.
Some people just learn to give it up sooner than others.


So I pissed you off.
Good.
It was intentional. It was special. Just for you.

So you can hate me with a clean conscience.

Now,
Back to where we were before I struck your nerve....

I'm fed up with all of the needy, greedy, no effort instant gratification,free college education demands from kids who can't even finish a basic high school curriculum. Send em back to the eighth grade and make em sit in those tiny little desks with the 14 year olds.

The young people who have special circumstances and have no responsibility for their own lives are, of course not included in this rant.
They have my deepest sympathies.

We'll agree to disagree then.


I'd write another 5 pages but I'm probably being a pussy which you were taught was unwanted behaviour, imo also evident from your drive to put people straight in the harshest and most direct manner possible. I know what thats like etc, thank god I had a lifechanging experience that prevented me from ever turning out like my dad or... you.




You can empower people through empathy too, you know. I hope you have success with your approach, though I'm also doubtful of it's efficiency.

originally posted by: NoNameNeeded

You can empower people through empathy too, you know. I hope you have success with your approach, though I'm also doubtful of it's efficiency.

I know empathy works.
I just don't see it as applicable in this particular situation.

Harsh, direct communication works pretty well too.

And you really have no idea what I'm like at all.

You take care now.

originally posted by: Nechash
a reply to: SlapMonkey
I must be aberrant. I knew I wanted into the sciences since I watched Jurassic Park as a child. ;p

I would say people like you and I are abnormal--I knew I wanted to be some type of artist ever since I passed time when being dragged to church by constantly drawing on the church bulletins instead of listening. Now I'm a graphic designer (after a short run-in with being a paralegal in the military for a few years).

Funny thing is, I enjoy working with my hands much more than on a computer and would prefer to be some sort of furniture maker or sculptor, but I have yet to find one of those jobs with some sort of promised retirement plan (which I'm not banking on the one I have still being there for me) or medical benefits for my family.

But, that's what retirment is for, right? Or, so they tell me...

originally posted by: badgerprints

originally posted by: NoNameNeeded

You can empower people through empathy too, you know. I hope you have success with your approach, though I'm also doubtful of it's efficiency.

I know empathy works.
I just don't see it as applicable in this particular situation.

Harsh, direct communication works pretty well too.

And you really have no idea what I'm like at all.

You take care now.

Yeah, you too.

a reply to: NoNameNeeded

What have I done? Sorry guys. ;p

a reply to: Nechash

No worries, no harm done

originally posted by: Nechash
a reply to: NoNameNeeded

What have I done? Sorry guys. ;p

Sometimes a good knock down drag out gets more communicated than a lifetime of chatter.
Great thread.
I enjoyed it.