Being a virgin for a long time or even till the death

I don't see a problem with the OP's decision as long as it did not stem from the indoctrination of any particular religious dogma.

My reasoning is that religions make sex out to be a filthy thing unless someone is married, and with that being said, this type of belief system has many cons.

The first is that when a religious authority says don't do it, or you can't. Guess what? the first thing many people do is the opposite.

Next is making everyone out to be whores, that are not properly inducted by religious rites, thus making sex OK.

Saving oneself for someone that we can connect with in a loving relationship is a wonderful thing, but hiding from relationships and sex behind a religious dogma is not a healthy choice imo.

Peace,

RT

originally posted by: TDawgRex

Every time you look in the mirror your meeting the virgin...again.

Not a personal attack, I just found that your comment tickled my funny bone.

TDawg,

Thanks for making this comment.

I now have Madonna's song " Like a Virgin" playing over and over in my head.

a reply to: AnnieWolf19

Doesn't it get to a point where you've waited so long that its almost an impossibility you will ever experience physical love and closeness to someone? Who would want to die that way?

Ok...I see if you've never experienced it, you cant miss it. But, moral attitude not withstanding, at some point, its got to be better to experience it at least?

a reply to: AutumnWitch657

By her own account she never really loved him, he was a means of her staying off the street. A part of me from a long time ago loves her. But let's just say there are circumstances (not including her relationship with my father) that make me despise her.

originally posted by: AutumnWitch657
Sure if you think of your mother as trash then you came from her you will not have much self esteem. I'm sure there was more to their breakup than just her cheating. There had to be a reason she went elsewhere. Something she was not getting in her relationship with your dad.
Oh and you are so NOT ,a waste of life. If you want to be spiritual, forgive your mom and learn to love her. I'm sure she still loves you. s reply to: Fargoth

I have to disagree. First of all, not all mothers love their children, second of all, how you view your mother has nothing to do with self esteem. I take pride in the fact that this apple falls far far from the tree. It is more of a self esteem booster. Also, some things are unforgivable.

I respect anyone's decision to stay a virgin for as long as they want. I personally am a serial monogamist. I have never had a one night stand. I have only ever slept with woman I am in a serious relationship with. I did not lose my virginity, until the first time I fell in love at the age of 20. I had plenty of chances before that I just chose to wait. My friends and father thought I was weird and/or gay. I just ignored them because I knew myself better then they did.

Now I am 30 and have only ever slept with 5 woman. I have the lowest number of anyone I know. I do not feel like I missed out on anything. I do not think you have to wait until marriage but I do think being in love makes sex better.

My current girlfriend who I have been with for almost a year tried to have sex with me after our first date because she thought that is what was expected of her for me to want to go on a second date. She was very surprised when I told her I wanted to wait. I waited about two weeks before I had that tingly feeling in my heart. I looked her in the eyes told her I love her and she has been mine ever since.

I know plenty of people who have nothing but one night stands and think sex is the new form of shaking hands when introduced. Almost all of them are unhappy. So just be yourself and do what makes you happy.

Who cares what she wants to do or not do in the bedroom as long as she isn't preaching and telling others to do the same who cares?.

a reply to: AnnieWolf19

My Aunt who is 68 is still a virgin. In fact I think she really only had a few handfuls of dates all her life. She appears to be about as happy as one can be as a single woman.

a reply to: JohnnyAnonymous

It's good that your aunt is happy as anyone else But are there any moments that people from family were laughing at her that she is a longtime virgin?

My advice, as your attorney, is to go get you some. You're not going to live forever. It is better to regret things you have done than things you haven't done.

a reply to: AnnieWolf19 Well there is all those changes that we go through at puberty. It's like we take on a different polarity. Finding a way to turn ones self back to that child like nature is possible.

a reply to: AnnieWolf19

No one has ever poked fun at her or did the "You need to get married (or get some)" statement. Our Family is pretty secure with everyone's individuality, and if that's what she wants, then we all support her decision.

Myself...?

Been engaged 7 times to 6 different women (you do the math), and no, I've never been married. And yet somehow I've survived being an bachelor.

Sorry but since you are a product of your parents how you view them will have an effect on how you view yourself. There is no way to disconnect it. And ok not all mothers love their children but most do. Don't assume his does not. That would be the exception not the rule. conomy reply to: calstorm

a reply to: AutumnWitch657

Personal experience proves you wrong. It is extremely easy to disconnect as long as you understand that who you are is a choice. Who your parents are does not dictate who you choose to be. I am not the one making assumption about a mothers love you are. I am simply pointing out that some don't, so by saying that his mother loves him, when you really don't know is an assumption you shouldn't make.

a reply to: AnnieWolf19

Does the opinion of an old married lady count? Staying pure is the right thing to do, and is to be applauded. Casual sex isn't good for anyone. Disease is only one factor; there are emotional and spiritual factors as well.

For those assuming that means only women; no, it doesn't. Men and women; same thing, from a Christian perspective.

Remaining a virgin isn't a bad thing. Having sex just to have done it would be a poor reason. "everyone does it" would be even worse.

originally posted by: karmicecstasy
Now I am 30 and have only ever slept with 5 woman. I have the lowest number of anyone I know. I do not feel like I missed out on anything. I do not think you have to wait until marriage but I do think being in love makes sex better.

36 and I have only been with one woman in my entire life.....We are also 22 years together this year and happily married. (Holding it off till we where married was never a consideration and we were sleeping together from the age of 15.)

I agree with not feeling like I missed out on anything, for me it's more the other way around.

Peace

originally posted by: AutumnWitch657
Why does it have to be either fooling around or having a true soul mate(there is no such thing btw) it's all black or white? No grey? I heard there are fifty shades of grey when it comes to sex. Why does it have to be considered mystical and spiritual or just a guy getting his rocks off? I can see what you think about sex by what you've written. I have had a few lovers. Some really great some not so much. None of it was just fooling around and the one who used me to get off only got to do that a few times before I kicked him out of my bed.
Oh and see above, I've been married for 33years and never once have I looked at another man. But when Keith and I first got together well let's just say it registered on the Richter scale. LOL.
n reply to: LittleByLittle

You are certainly the one here, who is most confused by it all, and it shows in your posts, you generalize everything, and the claim that everyone else is.

How about you REALLY find out what causes some people to want ONLY ONE, and if you cannot, and likely imagination does not even bring you close, then realize you are programmed by all the traps around.

Some of us see this as something FAR beyond all the stereotypes you are conveying, it is usually the witches that have gotten burned who do this.

a reply to: operation mindcrime

In my way of thinking you had the life I wanted when I look at your description. . Fate had another life that needed to be but I always have next life to get that experience.

Have a wonderful experience.
Namaste

Better to have love and lost than to never have loved at all imho.

pastasauce

a reply to: AnnieWolf19

Well I think you are all kinds of wrong for passing judgement on people. To me God and one's spiritual state have nothing to do with who has or has not had sex. I have frequently found that the ones most like to lay into you for not being sexually "pure" tend to be the most active. Ideally should people wait until they get married? I think so. Is it realistic to expect people to? No not really. For me personally I don't hook up with random guys and keep sex for my long term relationships. And I tell the young people in my life to keep that for the relationships where the person actually matters to them and to always use protection.