I have accepted I will be single the rest of my days

originally posted by: Elvicious1

originally posted by: ancientlight

originally posted by: Elvicious1

originally posted by: GRIZZ1044
Hey, I felt the same way for a long time. All I ever got was off and on again relationships with a couple women who treated me like #. I finally gave up and tried too accept being single never really took, but when i stopped looking so hard, an amazing woman came into my life. She's the best and she builds me up instead of tearing me down. I truly believe the right person is out there for everyone, sometimes you just have too stop looking and they'll come to you.

Congratulations. There is no other feeling like what you and I have experienced. Wishing you a long and fulfilling relationship.

Hollymolly, have you even read the title to my thread? I have accepted being single the rest of my days, that's why this thread. It's not 100% ideal, but I am there too now, but was feeling in the mood for a hug because I'm not a statue.

Now I'm actively working on accepting I'll never get that type of hug again. No biggie , I'm used to not be touched , so this shouldn't be hard

I addressed your query about my being a parrot and finding the right person when you're not looking above. Please look further up through the thread. You chose not to respond, yet you respond to a post not directed towards you.

The post I was responding to here is directed towards (GRIZZ1044), someone who shared a similar experience. I was congratulating them on finding a relationship suited to them.

Congratulations to you on wanting to be alone. Run with it, if that's what floats your boat. I will repost my original response to you in the post below "so this shouldn't be hard"...in your own words, for you to see the difference.

I realize that, you just sound like you're gloating to me , I was annoyed as I get these replies all the time: just live your live happily alone and someone 'will' come along'. Or it was along those lines. Just forget it now, it's not important.

1. You’ll meet a better class of people (women, for me) at church (mosque,synagogue,temple,etc.)

They are not all prudes, and not as narrow-minded as they are stereotyped. You don’t have to lie either- just say you’re “looking into” the religion. Most of them host singles events that are free.... religious institutions have been doing that for thousands of years. The secular society just doesn’t mention it.

2. Have you tried praying for sex?
Seriously. Literally— let go and let God. You can’t just do it once though. “Pray without ceasing.” Let the Big Guy know you’re in this for the long haul. Wear him out with constant “status updates”. Jesus says to do that. Not just repeating the same rhyme over and over, but at least daily “podcast to God” about how you believe he wants you to be happy, and you want to build a real enduring relationship that is more than the sex but is surely based on it, etc.

3. Go on 10 dates where you agree to not pursue a second date unless she wants you to.
I suspect you put a lot of pressure on dates like you are desperate. Guaranteed to keep you alone.

4. Find a “beard.”
This is basically a woman you agree to serve as social date for, and vice versa. You both agree not to be attracted to each other. I had this with my best friend’s ex. We’d go to a bookstore and women would hit on ME while the ex was in the bathroom. See, part of your problem is that you’re alone— and thus, potentially at least, an axe murderer. Someone to vouch for you makes you safe enough to flirt with.

5. Ask out a woman a week until you find the right one

6. Only hit on strangers. The ones you know have already put you in the friend zone.

7. Date someone you consider “beneath you.” Prove to the universe that you are not a bigot, and so the universe shouldn’t be one either.

8. Keep a Journal.
NOT OF YOUR FEELINGS. Fork your feelings. Keep a log of what worked and what didn’t. If you feel like you are Phil Connors in Groundhog Day, learn as much about what is effective as possible. If you’re not keeping notes, it’s not science.

9. Don’t decide I’m full of crap until you’ve done EACH of these in full detail

On the bright side you don't have someone purposely making your life hell. You don't have a mean mother and sister in law that secretly hate you. You get the remote. You get to sleep with no one snoring so loud you wake up exhausted. The toilets always available.
I would get a small loving dog. you could rescue one from the humane society. Do yourself a make over at a nice salon. Declutter and clean your house and car up. Buy some new clothes. Go to a singles church, place a personal ad or join a dating service and date 52 people in one year. Tell everyone you know you are single and wanting to meet other singles. The more people you meet the more luck you will have meeting a person who reciprocates the same feelings. Women who get widowed usually don't remarry. They took care of someone thirty to fifty years. They want the me time. You are brave and capable. Be kind and friendly to everyone and you will attract what you want. Be responsible towards others. Join clubs and hobby groups. Best of luck on your journey.

originally posted by: ancientlight

originally posted by: jidnum
a reply to: ancientlight

I felt this way once, then I met someone and remembered why I prefer being single. Now I'm content being single again.

Honestly, I don't think relationships are all that. I never want to live with someone , or god forbid get married, but just something more than friends is nice. Definitely need my own space and lots of alone time.
The problem is there is nothing in between it seems, I guess FWB comes close , but that's not for me.

I feel ya. For me I am selfish with my time and space. Some may think I'm an entitled brat but I think we are all entitled to what we want around and in our life. As long as you're happy that's all that matters. I also find the whole getting to know someone to be such a chore and somewhat fake. Just the whole back n forth of it all is unappealing only to find out the person you thought you were trying to get to know was just trying to be what you want them to be instead of what they want to be then it turns out to be just a waste of time then back to square one.

originally posted by: ancientlight
But at times it's still hard, and I just feel frustrated and lonely.
Off course , as I have accepted this, it means I am used to being single.
But I'm still human , and as I have decades to go it's hard.

It's annoying because for the longest time I was fine with being single, and totally in acceptance, and now suddenly it's a problem again .
I'm just longing for some human contact , or just a text .
When there's been nothing for so long , anything makes a huge difference

Please no messages that tell me to 'love myself first or nobody will' , or 'we are all born alone and die alone' or ' your time will come'
etc etc . Heard them all before.
Usually it's people that have no idea what being single , practically your whole life , does to you.

I've looked at weighted cuddle blankets, but as I'm in Florida those are no good.
It doesn't help with so few family and friends.
I will get pets soon , but for now I'm here again playing roblox all evening, my only 'social interaction'.

bet you all feel eager to message me after this pity party

No need. it was just a rant , better than always talking to myself

When you are not looking for love is when it finds you .

originally posted by: MeatHookReality

originally posted by: ancientlight
But at times it's still hard, and I just feel frustrated and lonely.
Off course , as I have accepted this, it means I am used to being single.
But I'm still human , and as I have decades to go it's hard.

It's annoying because for the longest time I was fine with being single, and totally in acceptance, and now suddenly it's a problem again .
I'm just longing for some human contact , or just a text .
When there's been nothing for so long , anything makes a huge difference

Please no messages that tell me to 'love myself first or nobody will' , or 'we are all born alone and die alone' or ' your time will come'
etc etc . Heard them all before.
Usually it's people that have no idea what being single , practically your whole life , does to you.

I've looked at weighted cuddle blankets, but as I'm in Florida those are no good.
It doesn't help with so few family and friends.
I will get pets soon , but for now I'm here again playing roblox all evening, my only 'social interaction'.

bet you all feel eager to message me after this pity party

No need. it was just a rant , better than always talking to myself

When you are not looking for love is when it finds you .

Careful. I said the same thing and was served a resounding dish of insult and a unhealrhy side of attitude and sarcasm for it, with dismissal for dessert. So much for Empathy.

Isn’t it sad to remember that feeling of being in love but be young at heart but know it’s not gonna happen for you? I’m in that boat too at just 39.

originally posted by: ancientlight

originally posted by: jidnum
a reply to: ancientlight

I felt this way once, then I met someone and remembered why I prefer being single. Now I'm content being single again.

Honestly, I don't think relationships are all that. I never want to live with someone , or god forbid get married, but just something more than friends is nice. Definitely need my own space and lots of alone time.
The problem is there is nothing in between it seems, I guess FWB comes close , but that's not for me.

You could always go with you newest relationship trend of "ethical non-monogamy," or ENM for short."

I mostly joke. It sounds good at first. People get together and spend time together like a committed relationship, but without all the BS.

But then you realize that most people use it as an excuse to have multiple relationships and not have to be comitted to one another.

originally posted by: AlexandrosTheGreat
Isn’t it sad to remember that feeling of being in love but be young at heart but know it’s not gonna happen for you? I’m in that boat too at just 39.

I saw some more replies so I'm back.
Yes at 39 that's too young. Though I've been single about 8 years now, so from 42.
Some days are easier than others at least.

originally posted by: Elvicious1

originally posted by: MeatHookReality

originally posted by: ancientlight
But at times it's still hard, and I just feel frustrated and lonely.
Off course , as I have accepted this, it means I am used to being single.
But I'm still human , and as I have decades to go it's hard.

It's annoying because for the longest time I was fine with being single, and totally in acceptance, and now suddenly it's a problem again .
I'm just longing for some human contact , or just a text .
When there's been nothing for so long , anything makes a huge difference

Please no messages that tell me to 'love myself first or nobody will' , or 'we are all born alone and die alone' or ' your time will come'
etc etc . Heard them all before.
Usually it's people that have no idea what being single , practically your whole life , does to you.

I've looked at weighted cuddle blankets, but as I'm in Florida those are no good.
It doesn't help with so few family and friends.
I will get pets soon , but for now I'm here again playing roblox all evening, my only 'social interaction'.

bet you all feel eager to message me after this pity party

No need. it was just a rant , better than always talking to myself

When you are not looking for love is when it finds you .

Careful. I said the same thing and was served a resounding dish of insult and a unhealrhy side of attitude and sarcasm for it, with dismissal for dessert. So much for Empathy.

That's so cute . Give yourself a pat on the back for that one

originally posted by: AutomateThis1v2

originally posted by: ancientlight

originally posted by: jidnum
a reply to: ancientlight

I felt this way once, then I met someone and remembered why I prefer being single. Now I'm content being single again.

Honestly, I don't think relationships are all that. I never want to live with someone , or god forbid get married, but just something more than friends is nice. Definitely need my own space and lots of alone time.
The problem is there is nothing in between it seems, I guess FWB comes close , but that's not for me.

You could always go with you newest relationship trend of "ethical non-monogamy," or ENM for short."

I mostly joke. It sounds good at first. People get together and spend time together like a committed relationship, but without all the BS.

But then you realize that most people use it as an excuse to have multiple relationships and not have to be comitted to one another.

I would be happy with a texting/PMs buddy at this point !

originally posted by: ancientlight

originally posted by: Elvicious1

originally posted by: MeatHookReality

originally posted by: ancientlight
But at times it's still hard, and I just feel frustrated and lonely.
Off course , as I have accepted this, it means I am used to being single.
But I'm still human , and as I have decades to go it's hard.

It's annoying because for the longest time I was fine with being single, and totally in acceptance, and now suddenly it's a problem again .
I'm just longing for some human contact , or just a text .
When there's been nothing for so long , anything makes a huge difference

Please no messages that tell me to 'love myself first or nobody will' , or 'we are all born alone and die alone' or ' your time will come'
etc etc . Heard them all before.
Usually it's people that have no idea what being single , practically your whole life , does to you.

I've looked at weighted cuddle blankets, but as I'm in Florida those are no good.
It doesn't help with so few family and friends.
I will get pets soon , but for now I'm here again playing roblox all evening, my only 'social interaction'.

bet you all feel eager to message me after this pity party

No need. it was just a rant , better than always talking to myself

When you are not looking for love is when it finds you .

Careful. I said the same thing and was served a resounding dish of insult and a unhealrhy side of attitude and sarcasm for it, with dismissal for dessert. So much for Empathy.

That's so cute . Give yourself a pat on the back for that one

I'll sleep so much better at night, knowing that you approve. Now, if only you would take ownership, the Universe could start revolving around you, again.

Those are nice.

Though somehow I've found myself with a little girlfriend a couple days ago.

I had just accepted that I was happy being single and enjoying my professional bachelor style life, when one of my coworkers told me there was a woman in production who thought I was cute and was asking about me. So, I figured why not.

I guess it is true you find them when you're not looking and at peace with everything. Guess that's why love is like a monkey wrench. Do I keep enjoying my life as is or do I take the risk of being in love again? Screw it. Even if it doesn't work out it wouldn't be the first time, amd even a short amount of time with a sweetheart is good with me. Makes for fond memories.

All I can say I rather be alone.

a reply to: ancientlight

Tinder it.

Don't be scared.

Honestly, this is one of my secret fears. Living very far out rural—like so far out rural that I have to use satellite internet—I don't have very much social interaction at all, and I worry that I'll never know what it feels like to be in love. I genuinely sympathize with all the other people in this thread who feel the same way, and I wish I could give all of you a reassuring hug. Nobody should ever have to feel loneliness.

a reply to: ancientlight

I’m so sorry, I never saw this post.

I live currently in Boston, but if I ever visit FL again I’ll send you a message and we’ll do lunch 😊

Kind of just hopping on this to vent. I hate when people think the solution is sex. Most single people (mainly women) can and do get plenty of sex. Sex is basically meaningless and doesn't feel my void. I'm tired of sex. I want a relationship