Advice and help needed please I'm scared.

My advice is to get close family friends that have good hearts and trust and have people stay over to help you. He needs all the love he can get.
Spend a lot of time with him and try not tobleave him alone.
Be careful not to be tricked.

reply to post by BO XIAN


I find it sad and amazing that you would think supernatural before childhood trauma. If you are a truly a psychologist then I don't know what to say.

Self-mutilation and substance abuse are very huge red flags for childhood trauma. Study, after study, after study and documentation spanning many many years has pointed to that link. Not to mention visits during the night starting at age 14. Follow the yellow brick road.

To the OP:

psychcentral.com...

Here's a website with great articles on the origin of war and childhood traumas:

www.psychohistory.com...

AND you might also look up info on schizophrenics and self injury. Here's a study I found on google:

Also keep in mind, Schizophrenia usually doesn't show up until around 18 but for 14-18 it's not uncommon.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov...

www.nami.org...

"Positive symptoms include

hallucinations, usually voices which are critical or threatening;
delusions, which are firm beliefs that are out of touch with reality and which commonly include the fear that people are watching, harassing or plotting against the individual;
disorganized speech, which is often seen as an inability to maintain a conversation, usually as a result of difficulty staying on topic and
disorganized or catatonic behavior, which can include behavior that is unusual and bizarre, or can be demonstrated by difficulty planning and completing activities in an organized fashion.

Negative symptoms include

reduction in emotional expression;
lack of motivation and energy and
loss of enjoyment and interest in activities, including social interaction."

Soulo
reply to post by TorSerfer

 

How can you walk away from someone you love?

If you are a very strong person, and want someone to 'take care of' for the rest of your life, AND have a good deal of knowledge in psychology, it could work.
If your do not possess an over abundance of strength and knowledge, it will deplete your soul- physically and mentally-until you don't even know who YOU are.
YOU do not have the power to make him well; only HE has that power, and he has to want to get well...even if that means going back to therapy' and/or a hospital for awhile.
People cut themselves because they are in excruciating mental pain, and feel they have no control over that pain. Cutting themselves is something they can control.
He doesn't want to get help because he can't even think straight. If he DOESN'T get help, he will eventually find another way to stop the pain in his life.
Good luck to both of you.
Nugget

reply to post by Soulo


Ruling out self harm is essential of course based on past history. After that tell him to be brave during these experiences, turn fear into courage and fight! I think we are capable of much more when in that form, pretty much just have a kick butt attitude next time he encounters this.

I know that's vague and cliche but I had several vivid dreams and started letting some of that fear go, one night I had a powerful OOB exp. with an entity "or myself" elevating out of my bed as I looked down at myself. I broke free only to shed my skin and appeared as soft glowing white with a blue hue, I fought back that night. Hope that helps

Get him to professional?
Pfff!
Remember occultist Jung and his dream book? Psychology started to pretend science as well as c. church when they started to teach scholastics on universities. Their main mojo is limited knowledge of brain chemistry. You'll get some pills to block dopamine receptors but ugly side effects will make you someone else with altered face running in place. People are on meds for many years without true healing.
You know what? They just found out that the main non-psychotomimetic compound of C. sativa - the CBD can relieve psychosis symptoms and anxiety/panic attacks without side effects. Youtube is full of it lately.

So you were playing with the same fire huh?

Soulo
I have managed to enter somebody elses dream before and I know it sounds crazy but if I could get into his I believe I can help.

Not that you don't deserve compassion. My advice? Don't try it anymore. He even doesn't wan't to tell you. Maybe for a good reason. I'm no expert but i 'd tell it could be real-deal demonic stuff or some TULPA stuff he created out of his hate from childhood rape or whatever. When the brain chemistry is altered by constant fear etc. CBD and maybe Neuroprogrammer could be helpful.
And Jesus of course

reply to post by OrphanApology


OF COURSE there is likely childhood trauma.

I just don't think--based on what the OP wrote--that it's as simple as you seem to make it out to be.

This is not a new sort of "presentation" or "history" to me.

reply to post by BO XIAN


I never said it was simple, childhood trauma is just that, trauma. From the topic post this man is a cutter who acts in a disassociated manner and has flashbacks of something visiting him in his teens. Sounds like possible sexual abuse or other type of abuse (possibly at an even earlier age). He needs a nurture type psychologist(not pill pusher) to work with him through ongoing therapy. Nothing at all about anything she describes sounds in the least bit supernatural. It sounds like a grown man that has some very serious mental issues resulting from some type of trauma at an early age.

There seems nothing supernatural about a self-mutilating, disassociated, paranoid, and delusional 30 year old man.

All signs lead to childhood and the results ain't pretty.

reply to post by OrphanApology


I agree with your prescription in large part.

I agree with your assessment in large part.

I believe you are inexperienced and undiscerning of the bits of evidence of MORE than that going on.

And, perhaps your biases are blinding you to such factors.

Nevertheless, I'm not there with the person and I haven't queried him extensively.

However, I have found over the decades that my inner sense and discernment in such matters has TENDED TO BE in the vast majority of the cases, largely spot on.

IF workable, there'd be no harm in him tracking down a psychologist who was skilled and gifted on all those fronts. If nothing supernatural was going on, well and good. If it was, it could be dealt with as part of the therapy package.

I would suggest to install a hidden web camera at home just to see what is happening while he falls a sleep. He could very well be doing this to himself. If you do this...don't tell him about the cam...

The other story which you mention in the OP...is too far fetched to consider right now. You could get some fresh info with a cam...in order to understand where to take this next.

reply to post by MarioOnTheFly


I think that's a good suggestion.

However, it may not be conclusive.

There's a history, as Whitley Strieber would attest, of cam's being turned off by 'the critters.'

BO XIAN
reply to post by MarioOnTheFly

 

I think that's a good suggestion.

However, it may not be conclusive.

There's a history, as Whitley Strieber would attest, of cam's being turned off by 'the critters.'

defo not conclusive...however...if that turns out to be the case (a cam turned off unexplicably), at least it gives you an idea...that you might be dealing with something "supernatural".

Whatever the cam shows..it will give you insight into what you're dealing with. Unless the husband can turn off the cam telepaticaly while in sleep...which I doubt.

reply to post by MarioOnTheFly


I quite agree.

Certainly it's worth doing.

And, I also doubt the hubby would turn it off in his sleep.

Actually, given the technologies available, I think it would be doable to set up 2-3 cams . . . at least one that hubby was unaware of. Friends and relatives could be enlisted in such an effort.

And, certainly, I'd not hesitate to get him as quickly as workable into the best therapeutic relationship I could ASAP.

And, I'd also certainly do every behavior-mod thing I could to reinforce healthy ideations and actions and extinguish the destructive ones.

Soulo go to this link

psychcentral.com...

community in the toolbar = forum

Both of you can read & get some idea's from others in which path you may need to follow. All kinds of issues are covered in depth by folks, as are treatments which work, or don't. Please give it a look-see.

Shame on psych professionals who DIDN'T give her this link!!!

This will give you a head start in working on things till (or if) you chose to pursue therapy. It's anonymous as well.

reply to post by Caver78


Calling them "professional" is a bit of a stretch lol.

I linked that website in the above post and yes it's a great resource and jumping off point. Thanks for posting.

Thanks OA! I find it more to the point to give someone resources rather than trying to fix things for them. It's their call after that, I guess.

reply to post by Soulo


Are you still there? I'd like to ask you st.

i cant think of anything that would make me ignore someones
advice, than the fact that they dare to say you shouldnt listen to someone because they are an apostate.
offensive and shows that they are dsconnected from reality.
I dont think you can assume "demons" unless you have something more than hallucinations and self harm.

reply to post by PapagiorgioCZ


I'm still here papa

reply to post by Soulo


It can be dogged . . . tenacity required work . . .

However, whether mental, emotional and/or spiritual junk is part of the picture . . .

PERSISTENT FOCUSING ON CONSTRUCTIVE THOUGHTS, ASSERTIONS, DECLARATIONS--even

"NO! I'M NOT GOING THERE!"

And then doggedly forcing one's self to focus, think on more constructive things--even if it's 'merely' emptying the trash, mopping the floor, doing a craft or art project, cleaning a shut-in's room, etc.

RETRAINING, REWIRING one's "stinkin' thinkin' " is a powerful strategy. Professional coaching can help a lot.

However, that one principle can do wonders when doggedly applied.

It's hardest the first day or 3. After a month or three, one is functionally a much better person in terms of the problems.

The principle is:

AS WE THINK IN OUR HEART, OUR INNER PERSON, SO WE ARE.

We CAN change our habitual inner reality with dogged discipline. It's worth doing.

reply to post by Soulo


Tell him to got get a job that will sort him out