Hello My Freinds... My Daughter Has Less than 1 Year to Live

reply to post by OpinionatedB


Feel sorry to hear that.
Stay Strong.

And I refuse to give up.

I will pray for her recovery.

Peace.

reply to post by Lady_Tuatha

I couldn't agree more. This is a blurb we have read on the internet, but for those involved it is the most devastating event in their lives. The fact that the parent felt comfortable sharing with us as "family" shows the spirit of our peers here at ATS.

Please allow me to add for the op: I have worked as a hospice service owner for many, many years and the one thing I have learned without doubt is that no one can take your place, no one can take your daughter's place, and everyone who says "I understand" sincerely believe they do when you are and will be the only one who truly comprehends your feelings. It seems as though you have faith and belief in God, and that is the second thing I can offer from my years of experience. You know God will do what's best for your sweet daughter and you will receive strength through that faith. Where would you be without that?

As I said in an earlier post, my heart is broken for you, but you can see how much your ATS family cares. Let us share the grief if it helps.

May God bless you all.

reply to post by OpinionatedB

Oh wow. Sometimes you people put me and my whiny ass to shame.

I feel sorry about your daughters condition, and believe me I have been in the hospital once for about a week, even had to go to the bathroom when they put a pale under me while in the bed for days, or the whole peeing through a tube which was completely unnecessary, as I told the nurse, but what the hell. It's a not very fun experience, they said I had a stroke or heart attack, or something, my heart supposedly swelled up in size even, I could feel it even in my chest. Was a possibility of maybe dying, or on drugs for a long while...yada yada yada. Sometimes doctors are a very superstitious bunch.

Though I think I lost like 15 pounds in 1 week, could not even eat or drink for a few days, and once they said my lungs were filling up with fluid as my heart was failing and wanted to do surgery to install something in there, they even had the table prepped and everything and were waiting for my signature. But I did not want to go through with it. And ya I had trouble breathing there for a day, though the oxygen mask helped a lot.

Anyways to make things short. Here I am now.... For now at least.

We all have to go someday eventually I suppose.

I am not very religious. And I dont have any kids, I am also not going to say that I know what you are going through. But I do have an inkling of something of it, and its not a very good place to be at, though live is funny sometimes, and I think you looking at it from the outside in on her. In many ways it may be more harder for you then her, usually when your in those situations its a sort of surreal feeling it does make you numb, and deaf to things, if you think your going to die. Your daughter however just being just 23 is way to young to be on her death bed. But life comes at you sometimes in unsuspecting ways, "in fact it does that pretty dam often" and believe you me, I know that sometimes there is nothing you can do about it.

However 1 year is still a long ways to go, she seems like in real bad and crappy condition what without even being able to drink or digest food. But I would not say to treat the whole situation, or think of her as dead just yet. And different people and different minds and bodies react differently to different methods of healing, just as different things would trip them up in life. For instance when it comes to certain things I am practically immune, but others would lay me low for months brooding and miserable itching to bite at people at the slightest inclinations, for long periods of time, and it could be vice versa for others.

Its pretty much the same with healing, nothing is a given, what works may just only work for you, and even then it may only work for you at a certain time and place. So I would not completely rule out alternative treatments for your daughter just yet, and you could even do some of them for on the cheap, some can come literally at your local store departments. If anything its worth a try, and people have given you some links, if its within your reach why not try them. And from there its nothing but trial and error, ie what works and what does not. If anything its worth a try.

But like you implied, and sometimes if its your time to go, and there is literally nothing you can do about it. As I said, not religious in the least. But I wish you, your family and your daughter the best of luck in all that, and she may just ultimately be in a better place if it comes to that.

I do thank everyone for their prayers. Very Sincerely.

I wanted to give an update as to my daughters condition. They are saying she is deteriorating fast, and they do not think she will last out the week perhaps not even the weekend.

Just an update. I am trying not to fall apart... but right now I am anyway...

reply to post by OpinionatedB


We are here for you Honey. All our love, thoughts and prayers are with you, your daughter and your family. Wishing you strength and courage to face the coming days. Hugs!

reply to post by OpinionatedB


You are in my thoughts and prayers. I know the entire community here is sending love your way. Just know that we are here.

reply to post by OpinionatedB

Sending prayers your way and also lighting some incense now for your daughter, for you and those close to you and to her.

Wishing that every beautiful memory you have stays with you always, but also that you still have a little more time with her and a chance to share some more words, some more memories, and always and always, the love you have for one another -- for that never, ever ends.

reply to post by JustMike


Thanks... I am falling apart right now at the seams... I am taking this medicine the doctor gave for my nerves and I am still shaking almost uncontrollably. I am barely able to function. I cannot even hardly walk at the moment my legs feel like rubber.

I don't think I can face this... or I just dont want to...

I am trying so hard right now just to think of anything to keep me from crying til I throw up and then crying some more until I throw up again.

I wish I didn't have to face tomorrow.

Somewhere inside of me (not outloud) I am screaming help me help me... but no one can.

reply to post by OpinionatedB


Sending hugs from here.

I have been in the same situation as you. There's no words. Just know that we're here if you need to grieve or to vent or anything else.

Sorry to hear the news B, there is no easy way here.
The pain is difficult but you will find peace beyond the grief.
I've lost family too but you know they never really leave us.
They will always live on in the hearts of those they touched.

My dad was in such bad shape we were relieved for him.
Finally his suffering could end.
Everything is in God's hands and you must trust in his judgment.
I think he's bringing his angels together now for a very special purpose.

May strength and peace be with you,
Asktheanimals

reply to post by Asktheanimals


Maybe they can pray for us....

I wish I knew why, what HIS purpose is. I am having a difficult time right this second. I feel so lost. I am supposed to feel ok, because I know she will go to heaven... so I am supposed to be happy or something that she wont be having any pain. But I just feel lost....

Like I cant face the day. I go through moments... none of which are good ones, some a little better than others though...

I came home from work this morning 30 minutes after I got there and had an emotional break down from which I am yet to recover.

What am I supposed to do now?

reply to post by OpinionatedB

What am I supposed to do now?

You are feeling the roller coaster of emotions that come with losing someone we love deeply. There really is no expectations of you. You're not supposed to do anything really. Hold onto your faith and those closest to you. Know that there are many of us here who have lost family members and know what that feels like. You are not alone even though it may feel like it.

The only thing that ever really helped me were diversions. I would try like hell to watch a good movie or read a good book and get lost in the pages of another time and place. I would try to be with someone close to me and talk or just cry and they would let me get it all out and sit quietly by. I'm sure you know that your daughter wouldn't want you to be so sad, but understands that you are.

Talk when you need to talk. Cry like a baby, roll into in a ball and feel numb if you need to for a time. Do whatever it is you need to do. It's all normal. We are here to listen to you, to sympathise, to love, to share in your pain and agony. We are not going anywhere as long as you need us.

Take one day at a time, one hour at a time, or even one minute at a time to get through this. Life throws so many changes and challenges at us that sometimes we are overwhelmed. It is so difficult to find strength and courage but somehow we make it to another day.

reply to post by Night Star


Thank you. Right now... I am across the country from her. She is still alive right this second, they were worried this morning that she may not make the weekend, and I didn't have the money... was needing time to figure it all out as to getting back there.

Now, they just told me she wont make it through the night.... My mother is rushing over to see her from 4 hours away, and she is not sure she can get there in time.

I want to scream....

What a nightmare for you to be living through this. My heart just breaks for you. I have just lit some inscence and a candle. You and your daughter and family are in my heart, thoughts and prayers. Your daughter knows how much she is loved and that you would be there right now if you could. She understands that you can't so don't beat yourself up over that. I so wish that I could take away your pain.

reply to post by Night Star


thank you so much.... I took another one of those anxiety pills a while ago, enough time before this last call I am handling it better than earlier...

Thank you for your words, and the prayers, and the incense. We need them.

reply to post by Night Star


All the pretty things in your post are nice. My daughter especially would love them. She likes all that stuff... she does a lot of drawing and poetry, and she likes tinkerbell too... hahaha

reply to post by OpinionatedB


I'm on anxiety medicine too. Don't know what I'd do without them.
Hang in there. I'll keep checking this thread all night.

An Angel for you.

reply to post by Night Star



Yeah, they are a godsend... !!!

Here are some pictures she would love...