The Girlfriend that left me.

2 Days ago i had a Girl Friend.

Girlfriend no more.

Dear my fellow ATS Members please drink responsibly while in a relationship, sadly my actions have sought to end the relationship I've cherished for such a long time (3 months)

It all started back in 3rd of may 2013 when i first met, It was so insane! because i had a dream before i even knew her that we slept together in bed (no intercourse just laying in bed together cuddling) NEXT MINUTE 2 week later we are sleeping at mine & at her place... Anyways we agreed to seal a relationship so forth calling each other GF/BF although it all ended 3 days ago when i was drunk & upset that she never turned up to our date night after booking out a restaurant spending 1k+ on making it romantic, she calls me at the last minute & tells me she's too high from smoking pot, so i got my Russian mate to show me how to drunk that night & boy oh boy oh boy did i not just get drunk i passed out from drinking to much... woke up in the morning & found my over 50 private messages sent to my facebook + recent reply's... hmmm wonder why was that? ... WOW.. Deactivated Facebook, Changed my contact mobile number the next day & thinking of changing my job for what i have done.

My dear dear advice to all you new people going into a relationship - Please Drink Responsibly & never ever be on Facebook at the same time while upset.

Love you all!!

Well, doesn't sound like much of a loss to me. you spent 1k and she was a no show because of that reason?
You are better off, but yes, drinking can cause a lot of problems.

She was the most beautiful creature I've ever seen in my life.

This fish was it's last of it's extinction.

I learned a few years ago about facecrack and dumped it....phewy

I'm a binger and I can tell you from experience that booze and chiks don't mix.

hey dont let one person hold ya back there're 7 billion people on the planet and a majority of them are female plenty of fish in the sea my man.

I am dreading seeing her tomorrow at work. Thank god our work environment keep to there own business

Its a life lesson everyone has to go through, and I don't mean to trivialize the situation you are in.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and be better for having the experience.

reply to post by joeym1991


Thanks man, i do sometimes forget that there are chicks like her but more better, going through what I've gone through in the last 1/half day has refined me.

I felt so in love with her but its all over. Thus i have more of a hunger ambition to go out there and myself a much better person + find someone similar to my liking at claim.

reply to post by benrl


exactly how i will return from the cave I'm coming out of, Great advice ATS members.

reply to post by FeelingPure


Been there done that

More than once as it happens, I lost a girlfriend of 5 years because of a drunken rant

Hey ho life goes on and I am now a very happily married man

When you hit the deck there's only one thing you do, get up wipe the blood off and carry on

Try and do it with a smile though it makes people wander what you know that they don't

Cody

reply to post by FeelingPure

It is refreshing to read a man, manning up and admitting his mistakes...I liked your honesty...Sorry things went haywire but maybe not all is lost...I might just be a sap for happy endings...but maybe after the dust sttles she will forgive and forget...wishing you the best...

I went out with a girl for 3 months once. I think her name was Jodie.

3 months In 9 months, it will have been 3 times the time you spent with her, and the sum total will be 1 year.

In no time you'll be wondering what all the fuss was, as you're with the next person.

And one day when you're old and grey, you'll look back and think "haha what the hell?" as the nurse sticks a suppository up your bum.

There's plenty of women out there my friend who im sure would love your company. The biggest tip i can give you is don't try and drink a Russian under the table haha, I have Russian friends and tried that one.....And lost!!!

heed this,
dont make a dick of yourself when/if you see her in work tomorrow
as cody said, life goes on
she's a stoner so she's unreliable anyway.
its unfortunate that you work together. keep the chin up.
as for drinking with a russian... well im Irish and my girlfriend is russian.
and i can say for sure that they sure can drink!
dont do that again

reply to post by FeelingPure


Dude...

First of all, you did the right thing. No matter what you said on Facebook you had every reason to get totally freaking obliterated that night. You just lost a grand, which you had spent on romantic tweaks to an already romantic setting (that of a meal in a resturant, which in and of itself is considered romantic) showing all the forethought, heart, mind, and soul, which are the basis of any decent relationship. You showed commitment there. For her to blow you out after all that effort was simply wrong, no matter which side of jupiter she was currently orbiting around.

If I had lost a grand on such an endevour, I would have been wasted for two weeks straight, let me tell you. It would have been fake a sickie and end up in a different county, wearing unfamiliar clothes and wake up in a hayloft wasted time for me I think.

Mind you, you have a lot to be thankful for here as well. You spent a grand right? Well, to even consider doing something like that, you must have had some funds at your back, so that puts you ahead of a poor shmuck like myself, who has two farthings to rub together, but needs them to start fires with (not quite that bad but no where near spending a grand on what amounts to a date).

This means you will not find as many stumbling blocks in future relationships as some might. Personally I think you must be some hell of a dude to have the funds to spend that kind of money on a date, let alone go out and actually do it. Maybe you said some stuff you didnt mean on facebook, maybe you meant every word, it doesnt really matter. You had a perfectly understandable reaction to that situation, and I defy any man, or indeed most women, to tell you otherwise.

This woman you were in a relationship with, who ever she is, has no idea how lucky she was to be involved with a dude as proactive as you obviously are. And to a much lesser degree, I know how you feel.

I have an "its complicated" rather than a GF. That is to say, I am emotionally invested with a woman who cannot reciprocate to the same degree. I am a one woman man, she is not a one man woman. However, she complained to me recently that her bedroom gets awful stuffy when its hot, but since shes two grand in the hole over a property sale at the moment, she cannot afford the time or money to get a fan or a cooler. So, I was in town the other day, and happened across some fans at a discount store going for a song. I decided that despite my own paucity of funds, I would purchase such an item for her.

Her response to my decision to spend my hard earned and rapidly dwindling funds on a fan for her? "Im not impressed." and "I dont want a fan."

She does want a fan, she told me as much. What she doesnt want is for anyone to do anything genuinely nice for her, because she would feel an obligation of some sort. I am going to a barbeque at her mothers place today, and perhaps I will get drunk. I feel a venting of bile coming on

Thanks everyone for the help, Just got back from work.....

this morning as i was walking to work i saw her at the bus stop, the F@#$ed up part was while she saw me she looked away, i put my handout to her as i walked past and she grabbed on to it, i said sorry to her & she said it's fine, she wanted to talk to me & she looked like she missed me...

Although...

After work... she didn't want to talk to me... i was walking back to catch my ride in the city with her as it was only us two.. she was pissed off at what i did on the weekend, I said sorry... while walking with her taking her to where she needed to go through the busy unsafe street... i told her what i realized.. I was in the wrong... i told her she made me realize & click that i can't lie to her... even though it was a stupid lie about me being in a religion 2 years ago that i left... I told she has helped me be a better person, treat the next person with more respect... (i don't know why I'm saying that crap i never did anything wrong..)

I eventually told her before she got to her ride that i will find travel around Europe to find someone just like her (i am not kidding).. she looked pretty sad when i said that..


Although she does not want to talk to me i feel she does & she loves me although she is just going on a emotional rollacoasta at the moment..

Love is the worst thing in the world...


I'm done with it... i don't care about it anymore although i still love her & she still loves me i can't wait for her to change anymore....

reply to post by FeelingPure



Firstly thanks for the update I was wondering at work how it panned out

Love is the worst thing in the world... I'm done with it... i don't care about it anymore although i still love her & she still loves me i can't wait for her to change anymore....

Love my friend is the best thing in the world.

Falling out of love is heart breaking I remember the tears I've shed over women each and every tear was a spike of ice through my heart.


Then I remember falling head over heals in love again. I've been lucky

There was my first love...............The one you never forget Sharon then

My first wife

The woman I left her for

And now Mrs C

Damn, I love falling in love, best feeling in the world

If it helps I fall in love again everyday as soon as I awake and and feel Mrs C's hand on me

Trust your soul my friend

Cody

reply to post by FeelingPure


Hi FeelingPure,
I wasn't going to comment, but I re-read your OP a couple of times...and just have to say something.

WHY are you the one who was wrong? She knew about her date with you, right? She chose to get too stoned to make an appearance? You spent a lot of money, trying to make it romantic for her?
And....when she cancelled (last minute)....THEN, you drank too much, facebooked too much...and ended up apologizing to her?

Action and Reaction, friend. You reacted to her actions. You might have reacted in a foolish, somewhat embarrassing way...but still....?
My advice would be to cut your losses, remain polite and professional at work....and find yourself a woman who totally appreciates grand gestures of romance (lots of us do, lol).
No one has EVER spent $1000 on a date for me...geez....I sure would show up for that! (silly girl)
jacygirl

reply to post by jacygirl


I agree 100% with you. I imagine the only thing this girl has going on for her is looks. It sounds like she thinks the world revolves around her. Where is her apology for being such a flake? Did she ever once tell you that she appreciated what you tried to do for her?

Most girls would cherish the fact that you went to such extents to make things romantic for her.

The next guy she finds is probably going to treat her like crap and she will wake up and realize what an idiot she was.

Girls like this drive me nuts because they give the rest of us a bad name.

Why would you spend a $1000 on a date?!

A. You're not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

B. You're loaded, in which case you shouldn't have a GF anyways.


I'm really starting to enjoy these forums. I'm finding that in most cases of heartache, you guys pretty much set yourselves up for it. I find it interesting that what you humans call "love" actually ends up being self destructive damaging so often. Have you ever considered that maybe you're doing it wrong?