"I Am Sorry That It Has Come to This": A Soldier's Last Words

On June 10, 2013, Daniel Somers wrote a letter to his family before taking his life. Rather than participating in the killing of women and children by direct orders from the hell whores in Washington, he ended his own life.

This is another tragic post war story. One about how a tiny elite of banksters and warmongers are using our soldiers as cannon fodder to serve their evil agendas at any price. In their minds the torture of a child in front of its mother, the killing of innocent Iraqis or Afghans civilians is nothing , compared to the stolen riches they acquire or the temporary political victories they feel they gain against their playmates in Russia and China.

It baffles the mind that even in these times, people still believe by sending their sons and daughters to a war far away, they serve their country, denying the warnings by such Presidents as Dwight D Eisenhower or John F. Kennedy.


"When people speak to you about a preventive war, you tell them to go and fight it. After my experience, I have come to hate war. War settles nothing. " Dwight D Eisenhower

I am sorry that it has come to this.

The fact is, for as long as I can remember my motivation for getting up every day has been so that you would not have to bury me. As things have continued to get worse, it has become clear that this alone is not a sufficient reason to carry on. The fact is, I am not getting better, I am not going to get better, and I will most certainly deteriorate further as time goes on. From a logical standpoint, it is better to simply end things quickly and let any repercussions from that play out in the short term than to drag things out into the long term.

You must not blame yourself. The simple truth is this: During my first deployment, I was made to participate in things, the enormity of which is hard to describe. War crimes, crimes against humanity. Though I did not participate willingly, and made what I thought was my best effort to stop these events, there are some things that a person simply can not come back from. I take some pride in that, actually, as to move on in life after being part of such a thing would be the mark of a sociopath in my mind. These things go far beyond what most are even aware of.

source

reply to post by johncarter

They say - those who commit suicide blaming a single reason - are liars. There are many reasons for suicide - not just one. Someone who commits suicide has many problems other than where they ultimately place the blame.

That being said? Wake up. There’s no draft. What was going on in this guys head? ’Joining up’ for military service yet not being prepared to kill?

I applaud your sentiments OP - and peace to those who lost a friend/family member.

My opinion? If you can’t take the heat - don’t become a cook. Or something like that.

Edit to add:

Here's the point so many of you are failing to get.

How many wars do American's have to experience before they wake the hell up and STOP SIGNING UP!

The government is NOT going to take care of you when you’re through with your service. Not medically - Not psychologically!

You WILL (in many cases) be ordered to kill innocents. WAR is NOT a freaking video game!

No? Tell me a war when these atrocities have not been committed by military? Duh. Can you say Vietnam? Desert Storm? Etc?

Killing civilians. That’s the reality of war. And it’s no secret anymore - Period.

So - what happens? Do these people who sign up just get selective amnesia? ‘Oh, I’ll never be asked to shoot civilians!’ Idiots.

Do I respect the ‘little man’ in the military? Yes, I do. But not when he/she ruins the lives of their loved ones by killing themselves - like they didn’t know war was going to be hell. No no no no. There’s NO WAY people can pretend to be ignorant over the atrocities of war these days. Just no way.

Am I sorry for the guy? Guess what? No, I'm not. I'm sorry the family and friends he left behind.

peace

reply to post by johncarter


Heart wrenching to read the final thoughts of someone in a situation like that. I am sure he joined the service with admirable goals and intentions in mind, then realizing to himself that he was a tool of giant machine that encompasses the US.

I sympathize greatly with his death and the loss for his family, these events are happening more often and with a focus on the larger picture in relation to their illness..

This part concerned me

Lastly, the DEA enters the picture again as they have now managed to create such a culture of fear in the medical community that doctors are too scared to even take the necessary steps to control the symptoms. All under the guise of a completely manufactured “overprescribing epidemic,” which stands in stark relief to all of the legitimate research, which shows the opposite to be true. Perhaps, with the right medication at the right doses, I could have bought a couple of decent years, but even that is too much to ask from a regime built upon the idea that suffering is noble and relief is just for the weak.

I wonder the implications of this?Was he really denied treatment through the over bearing policies of the DEA or was he seeking an escape of his reality through prescribed medicines to white-wash some of his memories?

In any case, this solider has highlighted a real and all all encompassing concern of many.

Originally posted by silo13
reply to post by johncarter

 

They say - those who commit suicide blaming a single reason - are liars. There are many reasons for suicide - not just one. Someone who commits suicide has many problems other than where they ultimately place the blame.

What do I say? I can’t. I don’t know.

And, there is no draft. What was going on in this guys head? ’Joining up’ for military service yet not being prepared to kill?

I applaud your sentiments and peace to those who lost a friend/family member.

My opinion? If you can’t take the heat - don’t become a cook. Or something like that.

peace

edit on 25-6-2013 by silo13 because: remove bold

I'm sure he did not join up in the army to kill innocent civilians, I would imagine he was prepared to kill for the protection of other people and his country but not the for war crimes and human right crimes just because he was ordered to by his higher ranking officers. In my book he has a heart and is a bigger man for not willingly killing innocent people, he obviously was mentally scarred after what he had went through and to be honest mental pain can be more painful than physical pain. If he were a relative to me I would be proud to be a family of his as he stood up for what was right. Admittedly maybe he should have not killed himself but who are we to judge that faith, we dont know what it was like mentally for him and I respect whatever his decision is. It's just a drop in the ocean compared to what goes on in war I imagine. its sad.

My condolences to his family and friends.

I my mind, not many soldiers are heroes.

This man is a hero.

It's a shame that he felt the need to bear the full brunt of the blame, when he could have used what he saw to raise public awareness about what war really is.

To late for that now, though. At least he had the strengh to say "No".

We need more people like him on this planet.

reply to post by silo13

Did you take your time to read the source?

To me it dosnt sounds like he committed suicide over one single thing, but to countless horrific actions he could no longer live with.

So he was not suited to be a soldier, suited to kill? maybe, but honestly i do think soldiers sometimes are pushed over the barrier of whats humanen to do things that can not be justified under the terms of war, dont you?

I agree with you on the last part, if somebody dosnt like to be here, they are absolutely free to leave for whatever reason that may be, but noone should me pushed over that edge by people they start out to thrust in, by a nation they where proud to defend. Stories like theese makes me sad

Just the quoted part in the first post got me choked up, so I didn't read the source.

I still wonder what atrocities he was commanded to participate in. Does the article describe any of that?

I suppose I should just go and read it, I'm sure it will be rough on me though.

Originally posted by silo13
And, there is no draft. What was going on in this guys head? ’Joining up’ for military service yet not being prepared to kill?

Did you even read it?

I am with you on this subject now, now that millions have the ability to see that their government is not fighting for freedom and not serving any moral goal. If people sign up to "serve their country" now, then in my opinion they deserve little respect from me.

But this guy signed up having been lied to by his government. Many of those who served in Iraq and Afghanistan had no reason to expect that they were just canon fodder for a regime hell bent on domination and expansion, with corporate backing.

By all means criticize those who sign up now under the delusion that they're serving - they're not serving their country, they're serving a corrupt regime proven over and over again to be using them as slaves - but this guy didn't know that.

It seems, from what he wrote, that he felt real guilt and that he understood the role he played. He was lied to jut like everyone else. He was told scary stories to make him participate. He believed that he was serving to protect his fellow Americans.

It's a sad story, but it would have had more impact and he could have given back if he had spent some time also detailing the crimes he had witnessed. That's perhaps the thing that annoys me about this. He knew of people tortured and murdered, he knew of war crimes carried out by the US forces, and instead of recording them for future investigation and some kind of closure, he's taken those crimes with him to the grave, further robbing those people of recognition and justice.

I feel bad for his wife and child.

This should be viral, and every individual who thinks about signing up to "serve their country" should read it before signing on the dotted line.

I have always said that people should only fight in wars where their fellow citizens are under attack. We have not engaged in a war like that since WW2. Anything else is simply a game for global leaders and their soldiers are mere pawns.

Originally posted by Ismail


It's a shame that he felt the need to bear the full brunt of the blame, when he could have used what he saw to raise public awareness /editby]

And the poor guy would be labled a traitor by his goverment and imprisoned or chased round the world....

Originally posted by silo13
reply to post by johncarter

 

And, there is no draft. What was going on in this guys head? ’Joining up’ for military service yet not being prepared to kill?

edit on 25-6-2013 by silo13 because: remove bold

Believe it or not most people join the military because they come from nothing. Most people stay in the military even though they may hate it because they feel they have nothing to go back to if they leave the service. I can say this truthfully after having observed it in my 8 years as a Tanker. There is a whole generation of youngsters craving discipline and direction. Every person who signs up to be a solider is told of their purpose, but every recruiter also downplays the reality of what their lives will become. You can't buy a cup of coffee at McDonald's without seeing 10 disclosures of how hot the thing is, but a 17 year old can sign up to be a living weapon for the war machine. And they're easy pickings because they're so often poor, uneducated, young, and easily exploitable. They're not warriors, they're just the next in a long line of weaker humans

Contrary to many opinions spewed on this forum the vast majority of people that enter Army service are not brain washed COD sociopaths that want to play with your blood. I know that my reasons for joining up were the same as I heard from almost all my buddies. I came from an impoverished family. I had only went to high school. The area I lived in had no kind of jobs or schools. I wanted to get married and be able to provide for my wife and I and then go to school after or during service.

Then I put my head down and counted the weeks while enduring two deployments, constant field training, constant stress and worry that comes with being a slave to the flag sucking Army officers. And when it came time to get out I remember being scared as hell. The retention NCO kept offering to get the McDonalds applications ready for me if I left and I remember really doubting myself because I suddenly remembered something that I forgot the whole time I was busy hating the Army. I had nothing to go back to. I ended up closing out that chapter of my life and moving on but I have personally known so many soldiers who did nothing but bitch and moan about the Army and then when their enlistment contract is over they re-up. I never understood why until my time came.

Of course you are gonna have your gung ho types that are born to be soldiers and don't care about what the actual cause of a conflict is for. That's not how a majority of people think though. Its rare that you hear soldiers remark on things like this themselves. See we as civilians have this thing called free speech. Its being dwindled down but for the moment it is still there. If you are in the service and you speak out against certain things you can be prosecuted legally by the Uniform Code of Military Justice. Its much easier to take the path of least resistance and just "suck it up and drive on." Do as you're told mentality.

And until the day comes when you understand the frame of mind of a person who wants to end their life, you will never understand their reasons. I hope that day never comes for you because its a sucky experience. Is it really a wonder for any American that 22 veterans off themselves each day? I guess its easy for an outsider to condemn.

R.I.P. Daniel. I hope you find the peace in death that eluded you in life brother.

Reading the comments below the article I can't help but think Daniel would be very pleased to see the very deep and revealing discussion his death has provoked. The responses run the gamut naturally but a fair number really get down to the nitty-gritty of the issues that combat vets face in theater and after discharge.

Suicide is always a tragedy and sadly it's the often the most humane among us that can no longer bear their pain and frustration. We lose too many of our best young men this way and I think the very nature of modern warfare makes it increasingly costly in emotional terms. We fight wars with no clear objectives or enemy other than to shoot back at those who shoot at you first.

Our minds cannot deal with that type of open-ended question about society when everyone is a potential enemy and out to get you. It bears extreme similarity to our government position on "terrorism" - a general paranoia about everyone and everything. It makes people dysfunctional and does the same to governments as well. This is the natural result of starting wars for corporate control of resources where enemies must be manufactured as a focal point for our aggression.

In the end the real enemy was the one cheerleading the loudest for us to go to war and destroy nation X before they develop weapon Z.

R.I.P Daniel. You did what you could, no one could ask more of a person. May his family and friends find peace and comfort in their time of mourning.

Originally posted by johncarter
One about how a tiny elite of banksters and warmongers are using our soldiers as cannon fodder to serve their evil agendas at any price. In their minds the torture of a child in front of its mother, the killing of innocent Iraqis or Afghans civilians is nothing

It's fine not to like the fact that warmongers are warmongers, but do you honestly believe that anyone in a high position that is not on the battlefield would ever order or find it reasonable that their soldiers to torture children in front of their mothers?

The fact that war does crazy things to a person does not mean that anyone (outside) likes or approves of that one bit.

reply to post by Nevertheless

It's fine not to like the fact that warmongers are warmongers, but do you honestly believe that anyone in a high position that is not on the battlefield would ever order or find it reasonable that their soldiers to torture children in front of their mothers?

What makes you think they care at all? Haven't "they" already proved time and again that they don't care of moral issues? Only for expanding their own power, wealth and influence. Why would they be empathetic towards anyone not them at all?

I read this on another site yesterday.It was very sad to read.I can only imagine how his family feels.I don't want my children going into this criminal military any more.there was a time when one could be proud of service,but these 2 past presidential terms seems to have turned our military into a criminal military.

reply to post by Cancerwarrior

I appreciate your insight. I do. I'm not trying to be uncivilized or uncaring. I do care. But I don’t like ignorance.

No, I’m not calling you ignorant. I’m saying - there’s no way in this day in age anyone can be ignorant of the atrocities of war - which includes killing civilians.

If you’re looking for a jumping off point in life - after high school - you’ve got choices to make. I got that part. But honestly - you do have choices no matter your socioeconomic status. So you have to ask yourself - Am I going to work for a burger joint - or join the military where I will not be afforded a flack jacket unless my family pays for it. I will be asked to perform acts that no human ever should. I will not be given any adequate help for myself of my family should I become psychologically, emotionally, physically harmed during my time in the military.

Some people will still choose the military. Others? That burger joint isn’t going to look so bad after all.

I am sorry for his family - I really am. Problem is - I can imagine what they’re going through. I’ve been in their shoes.

peace

Originally posted by Cancerwarrior
What makes you think they care at all? Haven't "they" already proved time and again that they don't care of moral issues? Only for expanding their own power, wealth and influence. Why would they be empathetic towards anyone not them at all?

It's much easier to gain wealth by not going to war in Afghanistan.

Originally posted by silo13
reply to post by Cancerwarrior

 

I appreciate your insight. I do. I'm not trying to be uncivilized or uncaring. I do care. But I don’t like ignorance.

No, I’m not calling you ignorant. I’m saying - there’s no way in this day in age anyone can be ignorant of the atrocities of war - which includes killing civilians.

If you’re looking for a jumping off point in life - after high school - you’ve got choices to make. I got that part. But honestly - you do have choices no matter your socioeconomic status. So you have to ask yourself - Am I going to work for a burger joint - or join the military where I will not be afforded a flack jacket unless my family pays for it. I will be asked to perform acts that no human ever should. I will not be given any adequate help for myself of my family should I become psychologically, emotionally, physically harmed during my time in the military.

Some people will still choose the military. Others? That burger joint isn’t going to look so bad after all.

edit on 25-6-2013 by silo13 because: double reply

Have you ever talked to an Army recruiter? Alot of them are pretty good. They go to school for it after all. They are basically salesmen for the Army way of life. And I have to disagree with you. It is quite possible for a 17 year old American to be totally naive of the atrocities of war. Especially when you have a real nice army recruiter that takes you to lunch, and tells you all about how easy it is to get promoted, and the college money, traveling, and the benefits and the insurance and on and on with the positives. You will never ever see an Army recruiter say, "Join the Army where you can kill innocent civilians and carry around tampons in your pockets in case you get shot because we can't afford bandages!" In the letter Daniel mentioned ten years a few times. That would mean he enlisted right around when all the craziness with Iraq was getting good and kicked off. I experienced alot in my two years downrange. I bet he did at least four or five and saw even more.

And of course anyone has choices to make. But sometimes you don't realize that. Have you ever felt like you had no choice about something at least once in your life?

reply to post by Nevertheless


For who exactly?

Rare earth elements, poppies and energy are the reasons Afghanistan was invaded.

If the number one export of Afghanistan was broccoli then it would not have been invaded.

reply to post by Rocker2013

But this guy signed up having been lied to by his government. Many of those who served in Iraq and Afghanistan had no reason to expect that they were just canon fodder for a regime hell bent on domination and expansion, with corporate backing.

No, he was lying to himself.

War = innocents getting killed. That’s the history of war and that’s how war repeats itself. There’s just no way this day in age anyone can remain ignorant about the atrocities of war. Vietnam. Desert Storm. Live Leak. Etc.

By all means criticize those who sign up now under the delusion that they're serving - they're not serving their country, they're serving a corrupt regime proven over and over again to be using them as slaves - but this guy didn't know that.

How could he have not known this?

He believed that he was serving to protect his fellow Americans.

These words have been cried out through the ages. ‘But I didn’t know! It’s not my fault! I thought I was doing something good!’ It’s still no excuse. Especially when you can’t turn on a television or computer without hearing the facts of war. The suicide rate afterwards. What - did he think it wasn’t going to happen to him?

It’s a sad story, but it would have had more impact and he could have given back if he had spent some time also detailing the crimes he had witnessed. That's perhaps the thing that annoys me about this. He knew of people tortured and murdered, he knew of war crimes carried out by the US forces, and instead of recording them for future investigation and some kind of closure, he's taken those crimes with him to the grave, further robbing those people of recognition and justice.

Yes - it is sad. Horribly. Horribly sad. But it was also preventable (his joining the military - no one knows if his suicide would have happened later or not).

As for him sticking around and telling about the atrocities he saw and was forced to participate in? Now you’re thinking! Really help your ‘fellow man’ by educating other young men and women about the realities of war! How many American’s might he have saved by sticking around and telling his story? By making sure his son/daughter never serve!

Now, how many American’s did he save by killing himself? We can only hope.

I feel bad for his wife and child.

I’ve been there - the spouse of a suicide. There are NO words to describe that type of devastation. None.

This should be viral, and every individual who thinks about signing up to "serve their country" should read it before signing on the dotted line.

Yes, it should be but again it’s not like these young men and women have not already been warned.

I have always said that people should only fight in wars where their fellow citizens are under attack. We have not engaged in a war like that since WW2. Anything else is simply a game for global leaders and their soldiers are mere pawns.

*High Five* for that! Completely agreed!

peace