I'm probably one of the only people happy their kids are moving in as adults.

For much of their lives, we weren't able to see my wife's kids (my stepkids, their father passed away young). It's a LONG story, but suffice to say, the system sucks, and the agency involved is all powerful and has Gestapo like powers.....

Anyhoo....her son is 18, and her daughter is 19. My stepson came to live with us a couple months back, and it's been great getting to know him. He was basically kicked out from where he was, at 18, so for him, not much of a choice. Either the street, or of course take us up on the offer. My wife would never let her kids be on the street though, of course, and we looked forward to the chance to get to know him, and become the family we never could before.

It had its challenges, but I think he's adjusting well. During this same time, his sister had basically cut off all contact from the whole family, but after seeing how he was adjusting, she reached out (responding to our reach out), and she's been coming to the ranch for visits. Slowly but surely, they're getting to know us from something other than a piece of paper. (and realizing a lot of what they were told were just out and out lies). I mean, they kind of had that inkling anyhow, but we both think the best way is for them to just see for themselves...and get to know us with their heart.

Now, she's decided to take us up on the same offer, to live here. She just wants to line up a job up here first, so that's cool. We told her she's welcome any time. Luckily, we have the room (just have to give up a craft room), so they can have their own rooms and all, of course.

Most dread their kids coming back home as adults, but we're glad we finally get the chance to be a family again. They both tell us how happy the visits have made them. They realize how much we all have in common, and we're all just excited to begin this whole new chapter. Reading their facebook posts has brought me to tears more times than I can count. How they feel like some gaps are now being filled and feel more complete. Just too cool for words really.

reply to post by Gazrok


Happy to hear that.I have had trouble with my family too. I find that of late (15yrs or so ) the family unit is not what it was. I think the independence slogan has its drawbacks.There's a rush to get on your own two feet and start a family and a job and start paying tax's ..could have something to do with it

I am happy for you, that things are finally working out with her children, even though they are adults now!
I'm actually happy that my oldest will probably be staying with us in a few months. He has to move back from Florida, and I will be able to see my grandbabies alot if he is living with us.

Originally posted by Gazrok


Most dread their kids coming back home as adults, but we're glad we finally get the chance to be a family again. They both tell us how happy the visits have made them. They realize how much we all have in common, and we're all just excited to begin this whole new chapter. Reading their facebook posts has brought me to tears more times than I can count. How they feel like some gaps are now being filled and feel more complete. Just too cool for words really.

Congrats!...this is wonderful news! You all have a second chance at connecting as a family, growing together and getting close. I am glad for you and yours. I know the most important thing in life is to...love and be loved. You are so blessed.

it's always refreshing to hear about Parents who don't follow the 'Grow Up, Get A Job, Move Out' Mentality,

Condragulations

Originally posted by Darth_Prime
it's always refreshing to hear about Parents who don't follow the 'Grow Up, Get A Job, Move Out' Mentality,

Condragulations

** Was that a Freudian slip? Lmao, con DRAG YOU lations... *chuckle*

I agree. When I was a lot younger, haha about 8 or 9 lives ago, basically floating from place to place between so called mates at the time, I remember one guy I knew back then, who we all thought was the roughest bugger around, mr know it all, been there done that, explain that he still lived at home.

WHY? we all asked in disbelief? You have a car. You have a job. You have loads of THINGS... why are you stuck with mum and dad, the hassle mongers?

"Why not? It's cheaper and I get a feed every night.." he'd say.. and I thought about it at the time, and not having 2 cents to rub together, kinda understood...

As long as you're not a mooch. And there is certainly a difference between someone living with the family, and someone relying on the family..

Currently, he's kind of mooching, but he is looking for a job...just not finding one (and he's helping out around the ranch some). His sister though, wants to have a job here before she moves, so she'll look prior to the move.

It does make economic sense though (and both kids love their mom's cooking). I think the years of missing that really ticks them off (of course, they'd not be skinny like they are now). Being on your own is tricky, and the more in a household, contributing to the bills, the cheaper for everyone.

All sounds good to me and wish all of you the best.............Wonderful

reply to post by Gazrok


I think its bloody fantastic that you get the oppertunity to start fresh with your kids! I hope and pray that all of you will benifit from being able to learn to live with one another as adults. Theres every chance that you will have a stronger bond in time, than you might have otherwise, so while you work out your fustrations about the missing time, I know you will be grateful for the time you do have.

The very best of luck to all of you

Happy to hear this! You and the Mrs. sound like amazingly wonderful people and fascinating too.
Enjoy those kids and that great house!