reply to post by Iamschist
I know exactly how you feel. It seems like you will never over come. BUT YOU WILL!
I remember having absolutely zero energy. I had time loss. I'd wake up in the morning and then all of the sudden, it was dark and time to go to bed. I
had absolutely no memory of the day that I had just experienced. It was really weird.
The bottoms of my feet were the most ugly yellow you have ever seen. THAT SCARED ME. They were flat and I felt like I was walking on bone. My finger
nails were flat (still are but not as bad) and my hands were nothing but flat, deflated skin and bones. I teetered between this life and the next and
many times I wondered if I would wake up. I was so weak, I couldn't lift my head off of my lap.
In a lot of ways, it was the worst experience of my life. But, in other ways, it was the best experience of my life because I lived to tell and I'm a
better person.
I was so close to passing over to the other side that I saw ghosts, demons, my angel of death and my ANGEL OF LIFE. I experienced what the Bible says
is the "Book of Life". My Guardian ANGEL was a beautiful female with long blond hair and she did indeed wear a white robe. She didn't speak. She took
me to a time when I was about 7 years old. Something happened back then that I had been blaming myself for my entire life. I have no idea what it was
to this day but whatever it was, a weight has been lifted off of my shoulder ever since.
Like I said, she didn't speak like we do. She just pointed and the message was spoken to me inside my head. I don't know how else to explain it.
I know you are feeling scared but don't be. You have made it this far. That is a sure sign that you are going to make it all the way. It might take
years for you to fully recover. I know it did for me. I know you feel like you are never going to get back to your old self and you are right. You
will NEVER be your old self again. YOU ARE GOING TO BE MUCH BETTER THEN YOUR OLD SELF........ You are going to emerge from this like a beautiful rose.
Right now, you are a flower bud. Soon you will be blooming again and then you will be in full bloom! I PROMISE.
The problems you are experiencing are normal for someone who has experienced such a devastating illness. Please just keep the faith. GOD has a purpose
for you. If he didn't, you would already be gone. This experience has been given to you to teach you something. It might take years before it is
revealed to you. For me? Maybe, God let me stay so that I could be here to encourage you through this difficult time. I hope so =)
It taught me to appreciate the little things in life. We take so much for granted. Hot bath, running water, flushing toilet, cool air in the summer
and heat in the winter. It is the little things in life that count and gratitude is the most important thing in this life.
I'm so proud of you for making it this far. You are a WINNER and YOU WILL BEAT THIS. Something else, I'm sure you have been feeling really depressed
and ugly. That is part of the illness. When you get better, you are going to feel even more Beautiful then you were before the illness and really are
today.
There really IS LIFE after anemia. If you ever need to talk to someone who has been through it and understands your plight, I am here for you. I will
support you and I will do everything in my power to further encourage you as you travel down this yellow brick road. You are a Light in the Darkness.
Soon, your light will shine brighter then ever. I have book marked this page in case you need me. Peace be with you and all you Love. You are an Angel
in the flesh. Giant hugs from me to you here in the spirit world of ATS. Cheers! YOU WILL WIN!!! DON'T LOSE FAITH IN YOURSELF!!! YOU WILL BEAT THIS!!!
GOD HAS A PURPOSE FOR YOU!!! YOU HAVE AN ANGEL AND YOUR ANGEL IS BY YOUR SIDE. SHE IS HELPING YOU THROUGH THIS AND SHE IS PROTECTING YOU =)
edit on 5-6-2013 by ladytamatha because: (no reason given)