Real Women

We hear the term "real men" get used quite often in today's world. Whether it be Women's groups advocating better treatment of women and children by men, men aspiring to live up to the expectation of their male role models, or old people reminiscing about the past, the term is used to connote how the average man ought to conduct himself if he wants to be seen as admirable by society as a whole.

What is not commonly spoken of is the idea of "real women" and I felt it was about time that concept was examined in the same light as above. This thread is not intended to serve as a platform for negativity and hate and if you intend to use it for that reason then please part now. What it does (hopefully) serve as is a guide for women to realise the realistic qualities that men find admirable about them.

I have listed below six attributes of what I consider makes women "real women". Please feel free to add your own, but remember to keep it clean, respectful and keep in mind the aim of the thread.

1. Real women show respect for themselves and to others around them.

2. Real women provide nurturing and emotional support for their family.

3. Real women strive for peaceful resolutions.

4. Real women don't emotionally abuse men, women or children.

5. Real women don't manipulate men using sex.

6. Real women don't use their gender as the reason to complain about their lives.

Originally posted by Dark Ghost
We hear the term "real men" get used quite often in today's world. Whether it be Women's groups advocating better treatment of women and children by men, men aspiring to live up to the expectation of their male role models, or old people reminiscing about the past, the term is used to connote how the average man ought to conduct himself if he wants to be seen as admirable by society as a whole.

What is not commonly spoken of is the idea of "real women" and I felt it was about time that concept was examined in the same light as above. This thread is not intended to serve as a platform for negativity and hate and if you intend to use it for that reason then please part now. What it does (hopefully) serve as is a guide for women to realise the realistic qualities that men find admirable about them.

I have listed below six attributes of what I consider makes women "real women". Please feel free to add your own, but remember to keep it clean, respectful and keep in mind the aim of the thread.

1. Real women show respect for themselves and to others around them.

2. Real women provide nurturing and emotional support for their family.

3. Real women strive for peaceful resolutions.

4. Real women don't emotionally abuse men, women or children.

5. Real women don't manipulate men using sex.

6. Real women don't use their gender as the reason to complain about their lives.

Your six attributes are commendable for both men and women. I do posit the possibility that both genders look for those traits in mates.

reply to post by WillowWisp


agree! i think the bigger issue here is real people. so so many people hide behind a computer screen....some even lie completely about who they are.... it indulges these bad qualities withhinn men and women.....thus you get more of the fakes in reality.....just a small contrubution to a big problem...... just need to.ignore fakes so they can't feed off you......

Yes, it is a set of good standards (with appropriate gender adjusted) for both sexes.
Yet I also find it sorely lacking today as applied to women.

Another point - self-reliance.
You should absolutely strive to be self-reliant financially (as I have been since the age of 23), except for the childbearing years. If you are a woman with a small child, you are excused for a few years to provide primary childcare (a priceless treasure when done with love and devotion - very valuable spiritually and at the material level for all next generations).

reply to post by Dark Ghost

3. Real women strive for peaceful resolutions.

5. Real women don't manipulate men using sex.

These two do not exist...

Most women (in my experience) don't want a peaceful resolution...they want to be "right". We are the ones who want peace, and so we allow the win, to end it (which is winning for us).

Of course women use sex to get their way, it's their trump card, their most efficient tool. It's like a guy having a socket set in his tool box, but using a crescent wrench instead. Only time blunts this tool. In the beginning of a relationship, the tool is deadly.

Originally posted by Gazrok
reply to post by Dark Ghost

 

3. Real women strive for peaceful resolutions.

5. Real women don't manipulate men using sex.

These two do not exist...

Most women (in my experience) don't want a peaceful resolution...they want to be "right". We are the ones who want peace, and so we allow the win, to end it (which is winning for us).

Of course women use sex to get their way, it's their trump card, their most efficient tool. It's like a guy having a socket set in his tool box, but using a crescent wrench instead. Only time blunts this tool. In the beginning of a relationship, the tool is deadly.

I've always striven for peaceful solutions and rarely had an argument with my husband, but he was a very laid back sort of guy.

As far as sexual manipulation, I made sure that guy went to bed with a smile on his face and off to work with the same, as often as possible. If that's manipulation, so be it, but I prefer to think that's what people do when they love each other. I NEVER withheld sex or bargained it. I consider that as weird as I do BDSM.

Sorry you never met any mature normal humans of the female sex.

Originally posted by DaughterOfARevolver
reply to post by WillowWisp

 

agree! i think the bigger issue here is real people. so so many people hide behind a computer screen....some even lie completely about who they are.... it indulges these bad qualities withhinn men and women.....thus you get more of the fakes in reality.....just a small contrubution to a big problem...... just need to.ignore fakes so they can't feed off you......

Or better still, judge a person by what you see IRL and not JUST their online activities. Using that list that DarkGhost provided as a guide, you should be able to pick out a pretty good mate or just become a better person in general.

This is the Internet, always remember that.

1/2 the people here will love you, the other 1/2 will hate you.

When you get a instant message from someone on the Internet, you need to be aloof, gamey, playful, unrealistic, downright ridiculous.

A real woman to me, is the one laying in my bed as I type this, not someone I never met, will never meet, and don't care to meet.

A real woman willcome onto you at the grocery store, not at ATS, do you understand that?

This is just me, your mileage may vary.


PS: I love you, what am I going to do? OMG what a drama!!!,

I never met you, I respect you, need you, want you, I will never meet you, I love my wife, I need you, I miss you.

You see how it is? its kooky. Now add tin foil hats, head cases and a few rocket scientists, and you can see how this may all unfold? lol



Please IM me, telling me how hot I am.

How to be a real women

Strive to stay close to the weight you were when you first met.

Have a pleasing, and pleasant manner.

Do not nag.

Be a comfort, and a joy to be around.

Take pride in the high standard to which you keep your home.

Learn to prepare delicious, and nutritious meals.

Be supportive of his goals.

Celebrate his accomplishments with him.

Show your appreciation for the way he cares about you by your actions in the bedroom.

How to be a real women

Strive to stay close to the weight you were when you first met.
(because we all know there is nothing worse than a tubby woman?)

Have a pleasing, and pleasant manner.
(Never be upset, even when he is a total idiot?)

Do not nag.
(Go along with everything? no matter cost or loss?)

Be a comfort, and a joy to be around.
(Crack jokes, back slap and never yap out of turn?)

Take pride in the high standard to which you keep your home.
(get on that vacuum, duster, because we all know, cleanliness is a woman's job?)

Learn to prepare delicious, and nutritious meals.
(Yes, and with your 40hr work week, your also a master chef)

Be supportive of his goals.
(Forget yours, they don't exist anymore.)

Celebrate his accomplishments with him.
Yes OK, this is a good one, it works both ways as well though)

Show your appreciation for the way he cares about you by your actions in the bedroom.
(Pound em good for that new dress and flat top range you just purchased her)

You sure must know different woman than me.

To be a real woman,


Concentrate on whats good, try not to keep dwelling on small failures.

Work with your husband to strategies together how to succeed, be tight and supportive when you fail.

Respect his mother, even if you do not like her, if the mother is a monster, your husband will also know it.

Mitigate time to keep the home decent, this is a 2 way street, its your job,its also his.

Plan together, work towards a common goal, then execute the plan TOGETHER

Try to find common interests, if he likes to sail, at least try it out, give it a good chance. I get only get a little agitated when you just do not want to try. I realize tor not going rappelling with me with 3 inch nails.

Be sensitive to his emotions, men are pretty much all babies who need to be molly coddled from time to time.

Respect your appearance, do your best, no woman can be perfect like the models in the vogue magazines, and he is just as likely to pack on a few pounds.

Dont be a stuck up introvert when it comes time to bed down together, a man likes a lady who can act like a whore behind clothed doors. But you don't want that attitude at the Christmas party, this also is a two way street.

Use some common sense. If you have long painted nails, try to keep them off the paint he so cherishes and works hard to keep nice (this included the space behind the door handle)

Last but not least. be yourself, its you we love, not some actor. Woman cant act, so just be yourself, because more than likely it was you he was originally attracted to.

Originally posted by lnfideI

How to be a real women

Strive to stay close to the weight you were when you first met.
(because we all know there is nothing worse than a tubby woman?)

Have a pleasing, and pleasant manner.
(Never be upset, even when he is a total idiot?)

Do not nag.
(Go along with everything? no matter cost or loss?)

Be a comfort, and a joy to be around.
(Crack jokes, back slap and never yap out of turn?)

Take pride in the high standard to which you keep your home.
(get on that vacuum, duster, because we all know, cleanliness is a woman's job?)

Learn to prepare delicious, and nutritious meals.
(Yes, and with your 40hr work week, your also a master chef)

Be supportive of his goals.
(Forget yours, they don't exist anymore.)

Celebrate his accomplishments with him.
Yes OK, this is a good one, it works both ways as well though)

Show your appreciation for the way he cares about you by your actions in the bedroom.
(Pound em good for that new dress and flat top range you just purchased her)

You sure must know different woman than me.

All the points I highlighted are available through launderettes, food outlets, cleaning staff, and sex workers. So if you are going to pay out for those services why go to the expense of having a wife.

I have no doubt that you could finance all the things a good lady can help with, but,,,,,,,,,,

I feel the way you posted on what you think a good woman is, is not really how it is today.

I think how you described this is more how my Grandpa and Grandmas relationship was and really does not reflect on the state of relationships today.

I am not criticizing you, that's not the OPs original idea. If this works for you and your lady, then that is OK, but I know from experience this would not fly in my world. Unless of course I was dating the Palm Sisters.

reply to post by Gazrok


100% correct.
I cant stand to be around women who use sex, revealing clothing and makeup as a means to be attractive to men.

I feel sorry for women like that. You have other traits that are much much more appealing, like your aspirations in life, your gentle touch, your ability to love...

any women approaches me in a mini skirt with a face full of makeup trying to convince me she's the one cause she sucks **** is a pathetic excuse for a women.

Originally posted by Agit8dChop
reply to post by Gazrok

 

100% correct.
I cant stand to be around women who use sex, revealing clothing and makeup as a means to be attractive to men.

I feel sorry for women like that. You have other traits that are much much more appealing, like your aspirations in life, your gentle touch, your ability to love...

any women approaches me in a mini skirt with a face full of makeup trying to convince me she's the one cause she sucks **** is a pathetic excuse for a women.

Unforunately, These are the types of women I run into more often than not.
But hey, they are good for one night... or a weekend.

reply to post by Dark Ghost


Your post and the traits stated are commendable for any sex to equip themselves with. The problem I see is "Real People" as well but maybe not in the light you are stating because: Role Models today are very hard to find. Just because most end up in "Sex Scandals/Money Scandels/Abuse Scandals/This list keeps going" so to this end is it no wonder why our youth are acting the way they are? Is it no wonder why people are so shell shocked on how to act that it starts deteriorating the fabric of Moral Fiber and Family Values?

Commendable at best but far from Reality of Human Nature not Nurture and the suseptable mind of the humans inhabiting this world. We delude ourselves in Role Models when time and time again they fail and we loose a little part of ourselves everytime we idolize a individual.

Instead why don't we equip ourselves with the tools for success and work on embodying those values and morals for ourselves regardless of stature or place in the world. Strive on being good person to be a good person and for those who want to act evil, Keep up the good work~

Real Men / Real Women.... Non Existent, though both are accounted for on this planet, Men and Women that is. S

So aren't we all Real, at least in the physical?

reply to post by signalfire

Sorry you never met any mature normal humans of the female sex.

It's not always the case..

I'm a happily married man, for 9 years now...

But, there were certainly times she used sex to get something, and many times where she wanted to "win" the argument vs. really resolve it. Can you honestly say you've NEVER done either? Honestly?

reply to post by Dark Ghost


As with most people here, I agree that this is applicable for both genders.

What annoys me is when lasses are like "real men should be strong and reliable and not obsess over their figures or looks and who can provide for me". Then when they start seeing a bloke who is all of that, they complain that he should put more into his looks and he shouldn't pay for meals and stuff like that. The double standards coming from the people who complain that men aren't real any more really does my head in. People should find what they want and stick to it, y'know? Not try and change other people into what they want because they don't like what they see even when they set out to find that in the first place.

The world is a seriously crazy place with stuff like this. And that's on a level of both genders. So, aye. If people stopped whining about what they have and actually appreciate that they're there, then I think that would make life much easier. And that in itself is gold standard in men who I "look for",and who I'd class as 'real'. The minute someone tries to put ideas into my head about how I should look or behave, I'm done.

Originally posted by Gazrok
reply to post by signalfire

 

Sorry you never met any mature normal humans of the female sex.

But, there were certainly times she used sex to get something, and many times where she wanted to "win" the argument vs. really resolve it. Can you honestly say you've NEVER done either? Honestly?

Ahh, but Gaz, have you not used that yourself? Coz I'm fairly sure my lad has against me just as many times as I have against him.

Originally posted by hotel1
How to be a real women

Strive to stay close to the weight you were when you first met.

Have a pleasing, and pleasant manner.

Do not nag.

Be a comfort, and a joy to be around.

Take pride in the high standard to which you keep your home.

Learn to prepare delicious, and nutritious meals.

Be supportive of his goals.

Celebrate his accomplishments with him.

Show your appreciation for the way he cares about you by your actions in the bedroom.

HA HA HA HA HA!

Give my regards to Rosie Palmer, eh?