Issues

So I dunno if I just look creepy or maybe I stink, I really dnk. I try approaching girls with humor, compliments, greetings and well just about anything you can imagine. I have no luck picking up girls that are not sluts and it has always seemed strange to me as I've never hurt anyone and everyone I've dated or even friends with always complimented on how cute and I am and that it's so nice that I'm tall and yada yada yada.
Dating sites? Well I've been successful numerous times, it has been the not so nice girls who are desperate. Except for my latest Ex she was really something just so lost in life and wants to be alone now.
Is it possible I am cursed? After all I have dated some witches.
I am very nice up until I feel attacked and than I either spare myself the bs and walk away or am not so humorous about stuff anymore and it is all downhill from there. I laugh lots, I am understanding and I always try my best to help and even stick my neck out for trouble only to be repaid with negativity shortly afterwards with some of the following issues.
I just cannot catch a break I always seems to meet superficial girls who don't like me on reasons based like I refuse to own a vehicle (Even though I have an electric scoot with passenger seat) or girls who want to change me or think that they are better than me and are all condescending and such. Girls who think like sex is awful or something and completely ignore me or explode or if I even mention the word, which brings me to my next issue, girls with no sense of humor especially when it is sexual humor. Why don't these girls just take a moment to think and not be so judgemental? Will a girl ever try to get to me instead of me trying my hardest to show them who I am but they are just too involved with themselves?
Meaningless relationships are very old with me now, can anybody relate to this in relationships?
Not saying I am perfect but I cannot remember the last time I've been given the respect I deserve by somebody I like whom I have never hurt or angered. I know, I know she is out there but that all seems like a big fat lie and that girls will not give a damn about me until I have absolutely everything they want.
To who shall remain nameless: "I am only human, you get what you get and if you think I am cute and I satisfy you why would you push me away over something you started?"

Wait, are you ranting about women, or asking advice on how to pick them up?

reply to post by beautyofperil

Is it possible I am cursed?

Nope. If you mean you dated real witches (i.e. Wiccans, etc.), then c'mon, many have some other emotional baggage, etc. I mean, I know a few myself, and some good people, but when younger? Could be pretty cu-coo... My guess is you are in your late teens or early 20's...just know that women at this age can be fickle at best. (just as we guys are often lost and don't know what we want at this age).

I just cannot catch a break I always seems to meet superficial girls who don't like me on reasons based like I refuse to own a vehicle (Even though I have an electric scoot with passenger seat) or girls who want to change me or think that they are better than me and are all condescending and such.

Well, scooters have that stigma. Switch it up to a motorcycle and you'll see a big difference.

Girls who think like sex is awful or something and completely ignore me or explode or if I even mention the word, which brings me to my next issue, girls with no sense of humor especially when it is sexual humor.

Depends on your approach. Even young women want a little romance before sexual activity, etc. As for sexual humor, that should be after you are comfortable with each other, otherwise, it's a red flag and scare tactic.

Why don't these girls just take a moment to think and not be so judgemental? Will a girl ever try to get to me instead of me trying my hardest to show them who I am but they are just too involved with themselves?

Sure, some will.

Meaningless relationships are very old with me now, can anybody relate to this in relationships?

If my age assumption is correct, you should really just enjoy yourself, explore, and learn what you are really looking for. Don't get caught up in Ms. Right, or try and go there. Don't have a kid, etc. Just have fun, play it safe, and don't get trapped into the whole kids/marriage thing until you really WANT this. Look up the stats on how many marriages in their 20's end in divorce, for example.

Not saying I am perfect but I cannot remember the last time I've been given the respect I deserve by somebody I like whom I have never hurt or angered. I know, I know she is out there but that all seems like a big fat lie and that girls will not give a damn about me until I have absolutely everything they want.

Not the kind of girl you want anyhow...but look at your other prospects. Do you have a good job or at least a career plan, college? Not just for a girl, but for YOU.

To who shall remain nameless: "I am only human, you get what you get and if you think I am cute and I satisfy you why would you push me away over something you started?"

The right girl is not the enemy, nor is she unattainable. But, you have to change this attitude. If you see yourself as a victim, you become it (and that radiates like female repellent). You have to have more confidence in yourself, envision a better future, and have a more positive outlook. Ever wonder how a rather ordinary looking guy can get women, even one who isn't loaded? It's all about the vibes he's sending out.

Finding the right girl also depends on where you are looking.

Where did you meet all the "witches"?

reply to post by Gazrok


I appreciate your input. In response I would like to add:

Nope. If you mean you dated real witches (i.e. Wiccans, etc.), then c'mon, many have some other emotional baggage, etc. I mean, I know a few myself, and some good people, but when younger? Could be pretty cu-coo... My guess is you are in your late teens or early 20's...just know that women at this age can be fickle at best. (just as we guys are often lost and don't know what we want at this age).

I am just about 28, and thanks sometimes I just need to be reminded of such things I suppose.

Well, scooters have that stigma. Switch it up to a motorcycle and you'll see a big difference.

I will never upgrade my vehicle just to impress somebody, I ride one by choice, call it cheap if you want but I will never pay such prices for a carbon emitting machine.

Depends on your approach. Even young women want a little romance before sexual activity, etc. As for sexual humor, that should be after you are comfortable with each other, otherwise, it's a red flag and scare tactic.

I know but they could just express that to me instead of hating for a minor mistake. And in my mind humor is romantic. Does that make me a hopeless romantic?

Sure, some will.

That is the best thing I have heard all day, can you provide a link to one?

If my age assumption is correct, you should really just enjoy yourself, explore, and learn what you are really looking for. Don't get caught up in Ms. Right, or try and go there. Don't have a kid, etc. Just have fun, play it safe, and don't get trapped into the whole kids/marriage thing until you really WANT this. Look up the stats on how many marriages in their 20's end in divorce, for example.

Thanks for the advice that sounds pretty intelligent. I won't be having kids anytime soon btw.

Not the kind of girl you want anyhow...but look at your other prospects. Do you have a good job or at least a career plan, college? Not just for a girl, but for YOU.

I work in a mill and have first aid, heavy equipment and other maybe not so educated things but they were definitely for me and my terms of employment.

The right girl is not the enemy, nor is she unattainable. But, you have to change this attitude. If you see yourself as a victim, you become it (and that radiates like female repellent). You have to have more confidence in yourself, envision a better future, and have a more positive outlook. Ever wonder how a rather ordinary looking guy can get women, even one who isn't loaded? It's all about the vibes he's sending out.

.

Well I agree for the most part, you do not know whole story. Long story short, I won't kiss ass or take aggressive criticism lightly. I think the problem maybe I am over confident and do not fear aggressive assertiveness towards somebody who can say something hurtful towards me. I am always more positive than they are imo.

reply to post by danielsil18


Highschool and bars. Of course dating sites, but I have already mentioned that.

reply to post by resoe26


Neither, I am discussing issues I have.

reply to post by beautyofperil

I try approaching girls with humor, compliments, greetings and well just about anything you can imagine.

How about just being yourself. Stop "trying", and just be yourself.

I have no luck picking up girls that are not sluts

Well, this was my first red flag. What is a slut? You mean that double standard that says what's good for the gander, is not good for the goose? I'm going to be honest with you here. I'm a guy, and I abandoned the word slut used in a derogatory fashion a very long time ago. Guys who use this word in reference to a woman's sexuality are usually immature, jealous, possessive, self conscious, and are threatened by any woman who is comfortable with her sexuality, knows what she wants, and goes for it with no apology. Just my observation. No offense intended.

Girls who think like sex is awful or something and completely ignore me or explode or if I even mention the word

So they're only a slut when they aren't with you? I'm not being condescending, just trying to get your idea of slut here.

It is said that in ones lifetime, they meet at the most, 2 or 3 truly compatible people. I would highly suggest you step back, relax, take a personal inventory, decide what it is you want in a mate, and then be yourself. Don't try to win a girls favor. Let who you are be the deciding factor for her.

When you stop trying, and relax about the whole issue, they will come to you if you are paying attention.

And do yourself a favor. Get rid of the antiquated idea of a slut. Truly there is no such woman. Unless you apply that label equally to men.

That is the best thing I have heard all day, can you provide a link to one?

Lets just say I've been in your shoes, and it's weird...sometimes it seems you'll have nobody interested, then other times, you'll have two or more. Don't know if it's pheromones or what...but just one of those things.

You're probably better off meeting someone through work, school, or some kind of recreational activity vs. pickups in bars, or dating sites. In those ways, you can get to know each other better vs. playing the "pick up" games.

reply to post by Klassified

How about just being yourself. Stop "trying", and just be yourself.

You misunderstand that I was myself as doing so.

Well, this was my first red flag. What is a slut? You mean that double standard that says what's good for the gander, is not good for the goose? I'm going to be honest with you here. I'm a guy, and I abandoned the word slut used in a derogatory fashion a very long time ago. Guys who use this word in reference to a woman's sexuality are usually immature, jealous, possessive, self conscious, and are threatened by any woman who is comfortable with her sexuality, and knows what she wants, and goes for it with no apology. Just my observation. No offense intended.

It's not like I have a slut radar, they had to cheat on me and tell me for me to find that out. I've never cheated on anybody, never had to. Aside from emotional cheating of course when times got tough. Your right about those traits too I am guilty of them, but I stand firmly behind they opened Pandora's box first in respect to them and I just followed suit thinking that if that is how they feel perhaps there is cause for concern because that is what they do.

So they're only a slut when they aren't with you? I'm not being condescending, just trying to get your idea of slut here. It is said that in ones lifetime, they meet at the most, 2 or 3 truly compatible people. I would highly suggest you step back, relax, take a personal inventory, decide what it is you want in a mate, and then be yourself. Don't try to win a girls favor. Let who you are be the deciding factor for her. When you stop trying, and relax about the whole issue, they will come to you if you are paying attention. And do yourself a favor. Get rid of the antiquated idea of a slut. Truly there is no such woman. Unless you apply that label equally to men.

I don't recall ever feeling accepted for who I am, nor ever being good enough for somebody whether it is my fault or not. It is always something. I didn't rule out men but thank you for that as it does make me see that I have become short with woman due to the fact and it is not so bad so long as they are honest, I still won't waste my time with such an individual though.

reply to post by Gazrok


Ya my recent ex I spoke of worked with my mother and is how I met her and it was by far my best relationship. But she is troubled

reply to post by beautyofperil

It's not like I have a slut radar, they had to cheat on me and tell me for me to find that out. I've never cheated on anybody, never had to. Aside from emotional cheating of course when times got tough. Your right about those traits too I am guilty of them, but I stand firmly behind they opened Pandora's box first in respect to them and I just followed suit thinking that if that is how they feel perhaps there is cause for concern because that is what they do.

Ahhh, I see. You're talking about infidelity. I'm always amazed at the what the same word can mean to different people. Slut has to do with promiscuity, not faithfulness.

I don't recall ever feeling accepted for who I am, nor ever being good enough for somebody whether it is my fault or not. It is always something. I didn't rule out men but thank you for that as it does make me see that I have become short with woman due to the fact and it is not so bad so long as they are honest, I still won't waste my time with such an individual though.

I'll be the first to say relationships aren't always easy. Neither is finding that special someone. But hang in there, and don't give up. Like I said, take a personal inventory. And don't get in a hurry.

What are the positive things I bring to a relationship?

What are the problems, and excess baggage I bring to a relationship?

I wish you the best of luck.

reply to post by Klassified


Ok, thanks dude.

All I'm seeing here is a 28 year old man with a lot of attitude who talks about girls, witches, and sluts who basically just wants to get laid, but has no respect for women, just a guy on the make.

Your first hint is this. "Girls" are under 12 years old. A female approximately your own age is a "woman" not a "girl." 28 year old women do not like to be called "girls" unless they are so lower class as to not know the difference.

I fully expect you to come back all angry and fuming at my post. I don't really care. Last post. Your problem is obvious.

reply to post by schuyler


Ok but your wrong. Please know I would still be with my ex which was a perfectly happy relationship, till she... Well hit something she felt alot of 25 year olds go through.

Terminology does not matter to me, if a girl is so shallow to think like that, good riddance.

reply to post by beautyofperil

I have no luck picking up girls that are not sluts

So you don't have a problem picking up sluts? That is what you want bro. 2 sluts in the bed is worth 10 girls you can take home to mom.

I just cannot catch a break I always seems to meet superficial girls who don't like me on reasons based like I refuse to own a vehicle (Even though I have an electric scoot with passenger seat) or girls who want to change me or think that they are better than me and are all condescending and such.

Alright now we are getting somewhere. So you don't want to own a car? That is fine, you are going to want to go hang out at some natural café or vegan place so you can find a girl with a name like sunflower or starchild.
But im going to go out on a limb here and say you have had issues pleasing mommy in the past- it would explain the types of girls you seem to be pullin in.

Girls who think like sex is awful or something and completely ignore me or explode or if I even mention the word, which brings me to my next issue, girls with no sense of humor especially when it is sexual humor.

Just a question, are the girls that think sex is awful your ex-girlfriends?
In any case you are doing something wrong, your jokes are probably creepy or just not funny. Something like "hey you want another drink? You should take it easy I put like 10 roofies in your last one so I can do sex to you while you are sleeping" Is that the kind of joke you are telling?

Meaningless relationships are very old with me now, can anybody relate to this in relationships?
Not saying I am perfect but I cannot remember the last time I've been given the respect I deserve by somebody I like whom I have never hurt or angered. I know, I know she is out there but that all seems like a big fat lie and that girls will not give a damn about me until I have absolutely everything they want.
To who shall remain nameless: "I am only human, you get what you get and if you think I am cute and I satisfy you why would you push me away over something you started?"

I think I know whats happening here, you are picking up chicks in the wrong place. You don't want to own a car and you have this whole pretending to be deep thing going on.
Its not an issue of dividing chicks up into dumb sluts and the ones you want. You just need to find the right kind of dumb chick for you.
Electro scooter and the idea that you are this deep complex person? You are a hipster, that is the coolest new thing you can be but that actually works against you. You are being a clone, a needle in a needle stack.
Find a new hunting ground or change what you are doing.

Click here for more information.

Originally posted by beautyofperil
reply to post by Superhans

 

How can you judge me calling me pretend to be deep?

Its pretty clear by what you write bro, im just helping you out here.

You sound like a woman yourself.

edit on 19-2-2013 by beautyofperil because: (no reason given)

lol says the guy crying about how he can't get girls. Listen buddy there are guys like me and guys like you. There is a reason why guys like you post stuff like what you posted, to get advice from guys like me. But whatever you can think whatever you want, have fun in celibacy land.

reply to post by Superhans


I appreciate it, I do for the most part anyways. But like calling me pretend? You've no idea who I am. Judging me by a discussion? Is that really something helpful to you? Well I did find humor in your post man that certain part just did not sit well with me.

Originally posted by beautyofperil
reply to post by Superhans

 

I appreciate it, I do for the most part anyways. But like calling me pretend?

I call it like I see it. And that unnecessary California "like" you use "But like calling me pretend" is not doing you any favors.

You've no idea who I am.

I got a pretty good idea, its cool bro. Just helpin ya out. Don't have to get all manners and decorum on me.