Entertain me Please (Corny Clean Jokes)

Originally posted by PurpleChiten

Originally posted by AkumaStreak
A guy walks into a bar testing his avatar image. It's me! And I don't see it.

awww mannnn..... did you remember to hit "submit" after you set it as your avatar?

Forgot that the image needed to be uploaded to ATS and referenced from ATS files URL. Thanks.

reply to post by AkumaStreak


Great Avatar!

If you want a new one after Halloween, follow the link in my signiture. We have several folks that make them as a hobby. You just tell them what you want and get a ton of choices!

does anyone else read every reply to purple chitan threads in sheldon's voice?

reply to post by Rikku


I actually get that a lot!


BAZINGA!!

Originally posted by PurpleChiten
reply to post by AkumaStreak

 

Great Avatar!

If you want a new one after Halloween, follow the link in my signiture. We have several folks that make them as a hobby. You just tell them what you want and get a ton of choices!

Thanks, but I'm pretty sure all choices prob. included embedded chitens!!!

reply to post by AkumaStreak


LOL, nah, I'm the soul holder of the chitenhood

Thanks for the entertainment everybody!

I'm hitting the hay, but feel free to keep entertaining one another!

A man calls a house and a little boy answers the phone.

Hello (in a whisper)

Yes, may I speak to your mother?

No, she's busy (all in a whisper)

Can I speak to your father?

No, he's busy.

Is anyone else there?

Some neighbors

Can I speak to them?

No, they're busy

Is anyone else there?

Some firemen (still whispering)

Let me speak to a fireman

No, they're busy

Young man is there anyone else there?

Some Policemen

Let me talk to a policeman

No, they're busy

What are they all doing? (yelling now)


They're looking for me.

Some more..

- I have a step ladder, my real ladder left home when I was 4

- A man was found dead in an ice cream van with hundreds and thousands all over him. Police think he topped himself

- Why do farmers always put gates on the muddiest part of the field

- Man goes to the "Antiques Road show" with a large object in his bag
- "I am 80 and have lived all my life man and boy in this house. I was in the attic and found this"
- "it must be at least 100 years old"
- Expert pulls the object from the bag
- Expert looks over his glasses at the old man and says "You silly sod, that is a water tank"



Sad but true, I lost 1/2 an hour bent over with laughter on that last joke.

For one-liners you cannot beat Tim Vine - they are truely corny

reply to post by templar knight


I got the first two and they were great

I'm not getting the water tank one.... what am I missing?
maybe an area-thing or something?

...I wanna laugh too!


ETA: I did some Google, is a water tank something that all houses have in them?
Like we all have hot water heaters in our basements here?

I guess I'm extremely Americanized.... I guess over here we'd have to change attic to basement and the guy would say "that's your water heater"

Do you know what moth balls smell like?
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How did you get their little legs apart?

(you said corny)

reply to post by PurpleChiten


There once was a girl from nantucket,
Who found a purple chicken and plucked it.
She said all the while,with a cat grin smile,
this was better then chicken from a bucket.

Posting this one for my kid.

Rather gross but funny at the same time.

Do you know why your poop is tapered?

So your butt doesnt slam shut!

reply to post by mamabeth


ACCCCKKKK!!!