My self absorbed list of overzealous complaints

This is a list of a few things I feel the need to complain about. It may even make laugh. (put your coffee down)

Annoying radio commercials. Yes they bother me. Mr Scott guy, I can’t afford to water my lawn let alone do it everyday. I can’t afford to buy your turf builder crap and even if I could I think I have better priorities than my grass thank you very much. You sound like fat bastard which was almost funny ten years ago. This just in, jingles SUCK. I am much less likely to give you my business if I hear that crap in my ear every 6 minutes so just stop doing it. Try a mascot or something! Maybe Mr. Scott is looking to do some moonlighting!

People that say lick the ketchup bottle. I can’t afford ketchup and if I could I’m not Gene Simmons and I can’t stand water down ketchup. Please stop promoting this idea, if you can’t afford to throw away the last little bit go to McDonalds and cram the ketchup packets in your purse!

Operating systems! Why is another coming out already? The last ones you made just got patched up to an effective state. Please let me use the working operating system for a few years before you upgrade it again. I don’t need a touch screen thank you a keyboard is much easier to use and the conventional screen lasts longer! It’s a conspiracy I tell ya! A conspiracy!

Stop talking about more fuel efficient cars, because we can’t afford the aging non-fuel efficient cars we do have, let alone a new one! I don’t see any place for a flex fuel engine in a truck. It’s a waste of time as it always has been. If you want to reinvent the automobile look into li-fe battery technology combined with computer controlled brushless motors! Here’s a clue, they can more than triple the RPM of an internal combustion engine, double the efficiency of brushed motors and they can almost equal internal combustion in terms of horse power and longevity. They’re getting cheaper every day and they would not only provide a more efficient vehicle, they would be more powerful than what we have now! If American engineers would just learn how to properly use a gear, we may have thought of that before. I’m not saying anything else about how that works because I have no desire to make another thief rich. If anyone wants to back me, U2U me about my work in that area. Please have real money and real resources.

Third party libertarian ads. Oh these really get me. One minute he says, “take votes from the other guys!” The next minute he sounds like he’s actually trying to run our country. Make up your mind!? Are you going to take votes and do fairly dismal, or are you going to win and become our next President? Am I the only one that thinks if enough people vote for this guy that we’re going to end up with some unemployed shrew that has no idea how to run our country? I’m all for a real third party, but at least get your message straight!

Hey all you sub par politicians, now is the time to run. Are you bad at being a politician? Do you have no hope of ever beating a real opponent? Can you barely pay for one radio ad with what was your pension? Join the other sub par politicians! You can actually beat these guys this time around. Where is Ralph Nader when you need him? How about pets? I have a German Shepherd and he can sit, shake, roll over, heel, and fetch. I think he’s got challenger Mitt out classed already!

People that think AK-47s are not dangerous. Yes they’re 60 year old tech. They’re 60 year old tech that hurls big rounds very quickly. I’m all for guns, but don’t kid people into thinking an AK is a puppy. It’s a real and competent weapon that needs to be treated with respect and caution.

Republicans. Mhm no AA rant thread would be complete without ragging on republicans. You are the most hard headed group I have ever seen! Your guy leaves the debate with a trail of blood and you still think he won?! Are you hard headed or just delusional? Let me rephrase, “Are you crazy, or just plain stupid?”

Stop complaining about Obama and his executive orders! His numbers are well below many respected republican Presidents, so drop it!

The stock market. Geez this is a big one. Stop telling all of us. I don’t care if some more billionaires lost their shirt. In fact I hope they did! No one has money in the market anymore, so just pretend it doesn’t exist and stop reminding everyone that the economy stinks.

Inflation. Stop discussing it! The more you remind people about the crappy economy the less money they spend and the more the problem becomes self perpetuating.

People that try to tell me the world isn’t ending or at least changing. Hello?! Did you not notice all these earthquakes in places we aren’t supposed to have earth quakes? Not notice the intensity of places that rarely have certain storms? The local weatherman even showed us pictures of the ice melting! 30 year career and he’s telling locals to prepare! He’s not nuts, he’s just good at his job. Stop the denial!

Oh wait. He did say it was supposed to be a warmer or extraordinary winter. It’s too cold for his hot winter prediction to be right. It is colder than normal though. Maybe he’s right but not completely right?

Subliminal word droppers! Yes I hate when people do that. They throw words out like “fast and furious” to remind us all of that when it’s not related to the current topic at all.

People that tell others to create an island to themselves. What is THAT? We’re all so incredibly isolated and wired into the social network of fakeness that the last thing we need to do is become more isolated. BAD advice, stop saying it. Too many people followed it and now we’re all turning into sociopath zombies! FAIL FAIL FAIL

The end. Hopefully it was a funny read. Real life often provides the best comedy, and a good supply of things to complain about. Thanks for playing along and don’t take it personal!

Love yer post, it made me laugh.
But you did miss a couple(or maybe these are just mine)

memes. Some douchebag twits (or is it twitters?) some mangled catch phrase and 14 hours later my 12 year old is reposting this defecation and tries to tell me its, "in the dictionary".

The crappy economy: I am sorry but i just don't see it! My business is up by 30% this year and last year i was up 17% overall. All these people who cannot seem to find a job have NOT looked on craigslist! I am not going to feel sorry for you if you cannot find a job with a B.A. in comparative Native American Flute Playing!

ok i'm done.

reply to post by redbarron626


Seriousness now. I think American business has died. People can't figure out the simple concept of finding what the people need or want (demand), and competently providing it (supply). That is all you need to do to thrive no matter what. It's pathetic that business has evolved or devolved to a game of monopoly with little plastic pieces that don't really matter to them.

reply to post by AnarchysAngel


I agree with pretty much all you said. Except that Romney left a trail of blood, that was Obama, Romney hasnt used a drone to kill a single American as far as I know, Obama cant even say he hasnt used them to kill more than one.

Also, you forgot to mention the billionaires that make billions a year in profits yet pay their employees so little they NEED welfare to stave of starvation, and homelessness.

SnF OP, quite entertaining.

reply to post by AnarchysAngel




One of the best rants I've read...and I like to read rants.

A hell of a lot better than the pro-sheeple rant. He had his points here and there, but yours are spot on.

This one could go on, and on.