It's going to drive me mad...

Ever since I was young, I've been afraid of the dark. Since the earliest I can remember, I've slept with a nightlight and my head and neck wrapped around the blankets as so none of my skin is showing. I practiced that sleeping ritual even in the hottest of days.

Whenever I was in the dark, it felt like I was being followed and watched. I don't mean by a human, it was like I could feel their eyes on me, just watching. Sometimes when I would get afraid and run into my room, the feeling wouldn't go away. I was running but I wasn't getting ahead.

Now I'm 19 years old, have a very decent job, successful in school and guess what? I'm still afraid of the dark. However, now it is much worse.

I load tractor trailers at a giant corp. close to my house. Much of my day is spent alone in these trailers just putting away boxes. Very often, out of the corner of my eye I'll see a tall pure black figure in my truck. Of course, when I look nothing is there...but when I see nothing there, I actually become surprised.

It's as if even my own mind wanted me to see something there. At my last job I felt that too, I felt like there was a person watching me. Very closely.

I never told anyone because it hasn't done anything, but I just walked into my room and saw the shadow move from the middle of the room, into my dark closet. The door was open and I have "black out" curtains because my girlfriend sleeps during the day. So nothing in my room could create this shadow, not even myself as no lights were on.

And yet, I walk into my bedroom and see this shadow on the floor and it glides into the closet.

Any takes on what this could be? It's simply driving me mad.

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth


It's either a projection of your own deeply ingrained fears,
OR
It's a shadow entity. They seem to come through in a 2 dimensional way..

Only you can really know. Both of these cases will become weaker if there is no fear to feed it. It's something you have to work on. Playing good music or instead of running just sing to yourself and don't act on your fear.

I used to have issues like this. I still get afraid from time to time when I can feel something watching me. My cat seems to see it, though I never have. I just call my cat over and pet him, pretending like I don't notice that stare.

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth

my advice: check your spirituality or let it get checked. what confession are you ?

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth


I wont deny there are things that go bump in the night, nor will I deny that there are things in the dark we just don't understand. Looking at what is believed to be true by many in these regards these things that we don't understand and that go bump in the night feed off of fear. It appears that you have been feeding them for a very long time and have made them strong both in energy and in your own mind. It is time for you to face your fear and let it go. Starve them of their precious dark energy. Something I was taught as a kid was a variation of Psalm 23:4 and that variation goes...Though I walk threw the valley of the shadow of death I fear no evil for evil haveth no hold upon me. I realize that words have power but they only have power to the level that we place belief on them so the more you believe these words the stronger they will become and the more protected you will be. That's my opinion anyway.

reply to post by Dustytoad


I heard it's like Astral Projection. The more you fear, the more it works for the lower beings.

My dad told me he used to be afraid of the dark too, then he just said "enough is enough."

He stood in the middle of his long hallway and turned off the lights and just said "okay, come and get me."

And when nothing happened he was no longer afraid.

reply to post by icepack


I don't know what you mean by what confession I am. I'll assume that means religion? Or what my beliefs are.

I believe that there are vibrational frequencies that humans are on. Every jump in frequency is in a different dimension. There are 1st, 2nd, we are third supposedly transitioning into 4th, and so and so into 9th when we merge with the all mighty energy source.

How do I get my spirituality checked?

reply to post by Agarta


So just ignore them and everything will be okay?

And don't fear?

I think that by instinct we are meant to distrust the night, since we are day creatures we do not operate very efficiently at night and predators who do hunt at night can easily pounce at you, so the brain needs to tell you that somehow so it makes you fear it.

I used to be the same as you until i decided it was ridiculous and i started standing in the night more often and actually realizing that it can help you hide from thing and use it to your advantage, once you realize it can be beneficial you change your way of looking at it and it wont hold you back any more.

I used to have the same thing with leaving my feet outside of the bed at night when i was young, until i decided that i was not going to let it bother me anymore so everyday at night i would stick my feet out for periods at a time until i was able to sleep with them pretty much hanging almost to the floor.

Fears are meant to be conquered and we fear what we don't understand, once you spend time with it and get to know it, it will stop being something that can scare you.

This is not a very healthy way of thinking, the night or darkness is NOT something, its the absence of light, it does not have any density. Its amazing how we can take something so simple and mystify it in a shroud of magic.

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth


I wouldn't say that ignoring them will do any good but more believing that they have no power over you. As an example in generalization lets say you have a fear of people. Your fear would be stronger when dealing with an adult than it would when dealing with a child. Down grade the entity/ies and remove the power that you have given them. Take the power over them as yours.

As you have strengthened it/them over time it will also take time for you to assert your strength over them but the nice thing is that the more belief you have that they are weak and you are strong the less they will be able to manifest and yes eventually they will not have the power to manifest and will go away.

reply to post by CesarO


Thank you for your insight!

I'll have to try it.

Well, you are 19 Op.... you will grow out of the fear, or at least I hope you do.

What I do when I am in fear of anything...

I simply numb myself and think positive. Changing your way of thinking is only something you can do in your mind.

Do it.... change your way of thinking and KNOW within that there is nothing to be scared of as your light is way too bright to be conquered by anything having to do with fear.

reply to post by Agarta


I like the way you think.

I'm going to have to try what my dad did.

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth

yes, confession = religion.

How do I get my spirituality checked?

with the help of a spiritual guide, like a vicar, minister, pastor, shaman, healer or some other kind of spiritual adviser.

reply to post by icepack


I'm Pagan!

Oh, okay. Is there anywhere in particular I could meet one who could tell me? I live in PA, USA. Kind of in the deep woods, I'm not around any big cities.

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth


Google this:

"pagan priest in PA USA"

the first two links seem relevant.

pagan listings

reply to post by johnwilkesbooth

i am from europe, so i can't help you a adress or something. maybe you can find someone on the internet ?
important would be to find a specialist, who is knowledgeable in this kind of occurrences. maybe a demonologist can help ?
imo, it could have something to do with your family history. maybe a ancestor of yours had abnormal events happen in his/her life.

The sensation that someone is behind you in an empty room is actually a hallucination, believe it or not. A little something to consider.

reply to post by icepack


That would be interesting to find out!

I wish there was a way to find out something like that, maybe astral projection would help find my past. I heard you can go into the hall of your past and see who you were.

Originally posted by EllaMarina
The sensation that someone is behind you in an empty room is actually a hallucination, believe it or not. A little something to consider.

edit on 6-10-2012 by EllaMarina because: (no reason given)

Well, I guess I've already gone bonkers than huh?