HELP ME ! I'm Scared For HER Kids

I need some help. I am this close to calling someone in a position to act on this persons behalf for the sake of herself and her children. I don't know what else to do.

I have a sibling who is presenting signs of a serious mental delusional disorder. For the past few days, I have received e-mails from this person asking for contact info of another sibling who wants nothing at all to do with her any more, so much so, she told her she was doing a religious ritual that would take all of her time for a month just to get this person to leave her alone. I myself do not have a strong relationship with this particular sibling, but I live in the same county she does and there is this unspoken obligation, that I need to do something. She has two children. One about to graduate in High school and another just starting.

I am going to do something unprecedented and post , with redaction of personal info, the e-mail that is the straw that broke the camels back for me because I need assistance from those of you who have experience in this sort of thing. This is after several similar e-mails that hinted of vague "thems and they's" who are following her around and hacking into her e-mails and listening in on her phone conversations. Constant paranoia. The sibling she has been trying to contact, used to live near her and had the same problems with her episodes of paranoia , tried to help her and she refused the help. She wants an audience. She wants people to play along and as soon as they try to address the actual paranoia, she abruptly stops and tells them everything is fine. Just like tonight. Here is the e-mail.

So... about whats going on with me you know I prayed about last night and I was going to let it go and go back to school and work and finish up and get my degree but no no Im so so so pissed off right now. Im at the library with [redacted]swearing up a storm which I ask God to forgive me and [redacted] is getting upset because Im using the F word. These d... hackers [redacted] are going to far, my stomach is turning so bad rt now and my face is hot and..... just a min.....................,ok Ive been trying to get a hold of [redacted] and I just remembered this morning that she told me she was going on a I think a 30 to 40 day long fast, which is something I need to do. I prayed so long last night because I didnt want anyone in [redacted] to get hurt not saying that they would. But you know what if these ppl want to push buttons and play games well let the games begin. I feel bad though because I my self am affraid of how far things might go once I ask for help... only because this organization or shall I say extended family of ours are nothing to play around with. And I myself am not looking forward to approaching them. I know once I do the whole situation is going to be out of my hands and over my head and Im scared of that. Im not a mean person like that and I dont want anyone getting hurt I just want to find out why what ever is going on with me is happening all the following and listening into my phone calls and hacking into my emails you know. And well you know sometimes ppl with power get in over their head and do just a little too much when too much wasn't really needed. So...Im calming down rt now. Sometimes I feel like I want to get back to how I use to be before I got married before all the verbal and physical abuse. Gosh [redacted] I was so happy remember? I loved being a [redacted] and adored ppl. And so much HELL! has gone on for the last 30 something yrs and honestly Im trying to get back to me and im trying to find [redacted] again. Im nervous [redacted]leaving soon she graduates this yr. She might want to be a Vet or Military Police Officer in the Air Force, or a Pilot like I want that for her. I mean I know I have to be happy for her its just military come on its so dangerous. Of course.................................[redacted]................... . Im lost [redacted] , Im lost. If anybody in the family ask what happened to [redacted] tell them I told you just a little of what was happening and that I said Im lost. Whats going on now everything with following me all over [redacted] and listening for what I have no idea I promise to Jesus I dont know why, has put me at my end. I give up Im done. If they were trying to prove that Im crazy or insane then ok they won they have succeeded I cant even concentrate and submit a resume to get a job anymore oh I tryed asking [redacted] for help and he treated me like I was crazy and then I told him a little of what was going on and then he decided to listen to me and then he started laughing. So thats what I am a joke a laugh a crazy person thinking ppl are following me making up stories that my email is being hacked and I dont know anymore maybe I am wrong maybe I am................. But I thought for sure................I was right all those times. I hate me I hate who I am sometimes well most of the times Im sorry [redacted] hey Im going to come see you at work ok I know you work in the middle of the night but its important that I come see you ok. I didnt want to ever feel this low again its been 3 years since I felt this way. well see you tonight love you sis

Okay, when she did show up, she did in fact present symptoms of psychosis. Her eyes were wild and wide open , pupils dilated. I know she takes medication and I know that some meds can make you this way. I had already sent her a text and an e-mail not to show up at my job because we have new owners and we can't have family members at our place of work and that I was not about to lose my job over this drama. But of, course, she didn't get that text or that e-mail as she showed up anyway at 12:30 am, wild eyed and spooked out.

I told her what days I would be off and that she could come talk to me then. She said that everything was fine now and that's why she came to my job in the middle of the night to tell me that everything was fine now. I told her that I was concerned about some of the things she stated in her e-mail but could not talk to her about it here at my job and then I said, if all of this is true, you need to be calling the Police. Not talking to me about it. If it's not, then we need to figure out how to get you some help. She then told me that she contacted the police lieutenant in our small city and he didn't do anything to help her. Yeah, because either she never did talk to him or she did and he told her she has a problem with reality.

I repeated the days I was off and told her that she needs to contact me or come over on those days so we can talk about the things she posted in the e-mail and get her the real help she needs. I am flat out ready to tell her she does have a mental disorder. There is not a single secret society on the planet that would want to waste their time on her. This city is way too small for her to be going through what she claims she is going through and NO ONE sees it including her own children. This is conspiracy theorist on steroids. The extended family that she is talking about does not exist. We are only four years apart in age and everything she knows , I know. The only people she could be talking about are the Masons as our grand father was one. That's honestly the only people I think she is talking about when she says extended family.

What do I do ?

Originally posted by skepticconwatcher
What do I do?

Honestly? Mind your own damned business. Because you know what? People (including children) are always suffering and in jeopardy and generating some kind of drama that sucks everybody around them into it. Your best move is to disengage yourself from it and live your own life and be happy. Because the more you get involved, the more you're going to get dragged down with it, and the more your own life will suffer. And what would be the point? Nothing is going to be solved. Things will happen as they will.

Do whatever it takes to separate yourself from the situation. Unless you thrive on drama, and in that case, your question and post here is just feeding into that, so you won't listen anyway. Otherwise, get out.

Just a couple of basics to get the conversation going. Perhaps going to the County mental health worker? A three day involuntary hold may be possible. Or, maybe child protective services? Do you have a family physician you could tell this to? Or do nothing until there is some harm to somebody? That would provide evidence beyond the e-mail.

In any event, you have my sympathy and prayers.

It would be nice if you didn't use the word "redacted" without knowing what it means.

I feel really bad for both you and your sibling. She sounds like she is really scared and desperate for someone to help her. When someone says they are lost that is a pretty bad sign. I think you should get her into a mental hospital ASAP.

A couple things for clarification? Has she ever named or described the source of all this? 'Family' is a term I've only heard two places in this context. A cult and the Mafia. I don't suggest either is really involved..but does she think so?

The other point is just this....Could she become dangerous? You see her and you look into her eyes. You can answer that like no one reading text on a forum can. Do you sense that level of cornered desperation in her? It's been my experience that people who feel they are being chased and hounded will eventually break entirely or turn and fight. In this case...fight whom? That would be the concern? By the way, there is absolutely no chance...no chance AT ALL that she could ever come to ATS, is there? I think seeing her own Email like this would make you an instant "Them" and to an extreme.

geeze.. What a mess... The normal solutions to come to mind like police or even a 72hr psych hold (Which you can probably get done...although write that relationship off forever) just don't fit when it's a sibling.

I hope this works out somehow, although it sure doesn't look positive for how at this point.

reply to post by Wrabbit2000


No. She hasn't. She claims I don't know about them because I was too young and I'm only four years apart from her.

reply to post by charles1952


That's what I am seriously considering. I just don't know how to get that set up. I want to talk to her and have her voluntarily go there.

You obviously have a soft heart for matters of this issue.Remember,as much as she is in denial,the consequences must be addressed promptly for her and the kids sake.People are strange sometimes without fault...although kids are the product of parents they are always forgiving.

reply to post by skepticconwatcher


Let me get this straight. You actually think you're gonna be somehow helping this persons kids by calling the CPS??? First off as long as they have food, clothing and shelter they don't do anything.

But lets say they did. Now you've done these kids the biggest injustice, the most haneous crime ever! Once there "in the system" those kids are gonna be screwed for life. They might end up getting abused in some way or another "in the system". By other kids, by there caregivers, but foster parents etc etc. No way, worst possible thing you can do for the kids ever. Besides you just need to time to calm down. Just ignore her. And if you need to get off on this revenge kick do something that will get revenge on her, not on her kids. Don't make them suffer as a result. And don't get caught up in this petty drama of life. It's not worth your time. Then you go post it on here for the world to read? That's nuts. Don't be a drama queen. And stop letting people get a rise out of you over such tiny little things. Wait until it's a big thing beofre you do anything. And then if you do again, not to the kids, to her. And maybe all that is is you sit her down for coffee and you try and make amends. good luck and leave the kids alone! CPS will ruine there lives if you go that route.

Do whatever it takes to not become "one of them" in her eyes. If she snaps, and you are "one of them" to her, you will be the first one she takes out.

And if she really is involved with something crazy, you need to stop associating with her. The more text messages and emails you send to and receive from her, the more "they" will look at you as being on board with her. Good luck to you; it sounds like quite a perplexing situation to be a part of.

reply to post by r2d246


I don't think I'm going to call CPS because one of them is about to graduate and get the hell out of there. The second child, a boy, is who I am worried about. If all else fails and things come to that where she needs to be hospitalized for a min, he can stay with me while she is being treated.

reply to post by skepticconwatcher

Speak to your own doctor about the problem and ask what he or she suggests.

I don't think you should come to ATS on advice about matters like this. A lot of people here are crazy, too.

Really? Distance yourself from the situation? Whoever wrote that should never give advice- ever.

Spend some time with her, get her relaxed, play some calming music and just let her talk for a bit. When her guard come down ask some discovery questions, find the root of the problem, be a friend and a family member, don't be a snitch! You could cause her to have to endure a hellish experience of being forcefully put into care, with the reasons totally unknown to her.

You sound intelligent, so be an example of how you would like to be treated if you were in crisis.

reply to post by jeramie


What do you mean not become one of them ?

Originally posted by Astyanax
reply to post by skepticconwatcher

 

Speak to your own doctor about the problem and ask what he or she suggests.

I don't think you should come to ATS on advice about matters like this. A lot of people here are crazy, too.

I don't have such a doctor or I would have. Not all of us live in the UK with free doctors to talk to whenever we feel like it.

reply to post by skepticconwatcher


Has she ever showed paranoid behavior in the past? Or is this a sudden change in her personality?

If you can obtain Olanzepine you could bring her back down by yourself without involving straight jackets and foster homes, in a matter of days.

Originally posted by Samuelis
Really? Distance yourself from the situation? Whoever wrote that should never give advice- ever.

Spend some time with her, get her relaxed, play some calming music and just let her talk for a bit. When her guard come down ask some discovery questions, find the root of the problem, be a friend and a family member, don't be a snitch! You could cause her to have to endure a hellish experience of being forcefully put into care, with the reasons totally unknown to her.

You sound intelligent, so be an example of how you would like to be treated if you were in crisis.

What a great answer, and one that should be considered by the OP.

Family should be there to try and help, not make things worse, especially for the children.

Originally posted by Samuelis
reply to post by skepticconwatcher

 

Has she ever showed paranoid behavior in the past? Or is this a sudden change in her personality?

If you can obtain Olanzepine you could bring her back down by yourself without involving straight jackets and foster homes, in a matter of days.

Yes she has which is why my other sister refuses to talk to her. She had the same issue with her before. And since she can't get to her, she's trying to tell me this stuff. I'm just going to have to tell her. I need to get her to my place alone and pull up the symptoms on the internet and let her read it and explain to her that this is what's going on with her. I have to get her to realize that no one is following her.

reply to post by skepticconwatcher


Extreme care must be taken to not scare her off. Just find a really non-confronting way of showing her how she's acting. Or some how trick her into a visit to the Local crisis assessment team for a "check up" if it seems she is too far gone. Would be best if you and her could both check in of your own accord. It will make her recovery process much easier. Hope this helped. (speaking from personal experience)

Originally posted by Samuelis
reply to post by skepticconwatcher

 

Extreme care must be taken to not scare her off. Just find a really non-confronting way of showing her how she's acting.

I like what you said up thread. That's what I am thinking of doing. I need to talk to her and show her this is not reality even though it may feel real to her. I just hope she listens.