posted on Jul, 19 2012 @ 03:15 PM
An older lady of no discernible age, looks at herself in the mirror. She pulls her sagging skin up and musses her hair. She remembers a beautiful face
under all those pesky wrinkles. She remembers her bright shining blue eyes before they dulled to a foggy grey. If only her grandchildren knew what a
trouble maker she had been. She giggled to her reflection as memories flooded her mind.
She was only 15 when she met a very handsome man that she loved with all of her heart. He had a fast car and an even faster motorcycle. Her parents
forbid contact with him but, that never stopped her. She would stand on the back of his bike going 50mph with her arms out like she could fly.
She would urge him to go faster in his car when he was already pushing it to the limits. She wanted to feel the speed and adrenaline pump through
her veins. She would edge closer to him and push his leg harder onto the gas pedal. He would only grab the steering wheel tighter and look at her and
smile.
He left her heartbroken and devastated when he joined the Marines. She was just going on 17. He had tenderly brushed her hair to the side and
gingerly kissed her cheek as he took his farewell. He didn’t want her to be sad but, she cried herself to sleep every night for a week after he was
gone.
The old lady looked at herself again with those aging eyes and frowning face. The first love of her life was never forgotten. He always lingered in
the back of her mind. She had read his obituary several years ago now, and had cried just as hard that day as she had the day he left for the Marines.
She took a moment to savor the memory before the next one took over.
She was standing in the back of a big truck as it went screaming through the mud. She was filthy and laughing hysterically. She was holding on to
the cab for dear life but didn’t care what happened. When the truck came to a stop she jumped down and her newest beau swung her around in his arms.
Both of them laughing like children with new toys on Christmas morning.
She was just on the edge of 18 and thought she was living some of the best days of her life. Late nights, no parents, best friends, and no worries
in the world. She was to be married in a year or so to the man she thought she loved. He was the one she was going to spend forever with.
The old lady brushed a tear off of her cheek as she remembered the day she that would change her forever. Her best friend had been riding in the
window of a truck and fell out going too fast down the road. She never knew what was coming. Her friend had died instantly. The old lady sighed and
looked back in the mirror.
The man she thought was the one, the man full of life and even fuller of alcohol, had cheated on her shortly after the devastating blow of her
friends death. Her world was crumbling down around her. She sank into depression and lost a little bit of the fire that had burned inside of her
heart.
But, along came another man full of life and a need for speed. He was the one who taught her about racing and the mechanics of a fast car. He was
never afraid to go faster and loved to see her smile with her hair blowing in the wind.
She had married this man, on the beach in a quite ceremony. It was lovely with water and a setting sun as the backdrop. Her friends and family said
it would never last but she was determined to prove them all wrong. Little did she know just how right they were.
They were married for 3 years, 3 months, and 3 days when he left her, taking everything they had. She knew this time she had truly hit rock bottom.
She was in a far off place with no family, no way to pay all of the bills, and scared to death. Struggling people can sometimes do miraculous things
though, and she had survived.
The old lady picked up a picture that sat beside the mirror. She ran her fingers over the face that was all so familiar. Her Prince Charming, her
happily ever after. She was sobbing openly now and she knew her makeup would be ruined. She didn’t care, she knew how the story ended and she let
the memories flood her one last time.
Out of her misery a budding friendship bloomed into a romance. He didn’t have a fast motorcycle, he didn’t have a dirty truck, and he didn’t
have the need for speed. What he did have was a fishing pole and a kind heart.
They would spend hours on the bluffs or fishing pier talking about everything and nothing. He taught her how to cast, (even hooking her in neck one
time) and how to bait a hook. Things were going well for them and they knew somehow that this was the beginning to their happily ever after.
After a few years, her life was changed forever when she found out that she was pregnant. Somehow she had gone from crazy girl to parent in the
space of moments to her mind. She wanted everything for her baby girl and she wanted her baby to be nothing like her in her teen years.
Another year passed and another baby girl had arrived. Both girls beautiful and perfect in every way. She prayed that they would not be like she was
and they would be safe as they grew. Her husband only laughed and teased her as her girls got into trouble.
The old lady picked up the other picture beside the mirror and stared lost in the faces. She now had 5 grandchildren that she didn’t get to see
nearly enough. They would never know the true her, the young and carefree her. The woman that was beautiful and full of life.
They only knew the old lady that had lost her husband when they were too small to remember and the lady that cooked thanksgiving dinner. Her
grandchildren will never ask her life story because they don’t think she even existed before they were born.
She reapplied her ruined makeup and brushed her curls that were now white instead of shining blonde. She stood and looked at her aging body in the
mirror and just shrugged her shoulders. What could she possible do about the sags anyway?
She took a deep breath and prepared herself for the task at hand. Today was the day she had to reveal to her gathered family that she was losing her
fight with cancer. In three months time she would cease to exist. Her memories gone with her. Her stories belonging only to her, forever laid to
rest.
As her children and grandchildren were packing up Granny’s things, they came across letters from a marine, pictures of a muddy girl, and pictures
of a beach wedding that wasn’t with their father. They wondered aloud what all of it meant but, no one was there to tell them the answers. If only
they had asked the questions while she had still been alive.