Need help regarding skin condition

I have been dating this girl for 4,5 months already and I love her, but... there is a huge problem. She has herpes, and I have seberrhoeic dermatitis. I was willing to risk my relationship even if I will get myself a herpes, but I thought that that would be worst that could happen. But.. few days ago I found out about disease called Eczema Herpeticum, which is a potentially deadly inflammatory disease which is caused by herpes virus HPV1 and infects inflamed skin such as Eczema, Seborrhoeic dermatitis, etc. It will create watery pastules/warts/nodules, which if untreated, will spread to whole face and then rest of the body and may cause death...
I love her, and I cant imagine being without her... but I am afraid of this. How big risk is developing that disease? I heard it's rare. Also, what precautions should we make? We haven't been kissing when she had an active outbreak, however, we started kissing once her Herpes turned into a scab, which, she said, was harmless. What precautions should we make? Can she kiss me on places affected by seberrhoeic dermatitis, either if she has a scab or she doesnt have anything at all? Please,help. Thanks.

reply to post by Farnhold


Time to move on, buddy. There are an abundance of fish in the sea.

reply to post by Farnhold

I have been dating this girl for 4,5 months already and I love her

lol ! there is your first mistake. Sometimes we confuse lust for love . Women do it all the time , heance why they end up with jerks .

as for your skin condition and her condition. I would say its a bad mix , Why take the risk ? over something that fades with time anyway ?

But if you love her so much , and willing to endure that sort of weridness then all the power to ya bud !

But from a man's prospective your crazy foo!

It sounds like you're talking about oral herpes, which the CDC claims 4/5 people have. I learned this because my son recently contracted oral herpes from his daycare. I was really concerned and felt horrible, then I learned from my doctor that it's SUPER common, and most people have it. Many who do will never show any signs of being a carrier outside of their initial flare up.

There are other fish in the sea, but probably 80% of them have the same problem. If you love her, this seems like a small issue to me.

Just so you know, it is believed that herpes 1 (oral) will create antibodies to prevent outbreaks on other parts of the body, and will also help build an immunity to herpes simplex 2, which is the genital kind.

In all honesty you probably already have herpes simplex 1 - so if she has simplex 1 you can always go get tested to see if you've already contracted it. If you have, there's no reason to dump her for this - if you haven't, well again 80% of the population has it, so it's probably only a matter of time..

reply to post by Farnhold


So, you are talking about the lip herpes? You should really make that distinction, because the lip version is extremely common, and unaggressive and has less social stigma. The other Herpes really sends the wrong message to people.

So, if you are talking of the lip herpes, it is easily kept in control, just don't kiss her during an outbreak.

L-Lysine in extreme doses will make the sore accelerate through its process and go away quickly. Usually a couple of days. I think 5000 units per day when she first starts to notice an outbreak is imminent, but google and verify that. Usually they can feel a numbness or tingling just before a sore appears and they can nuke it ahead of time.

There are also medicines now like Abreva that are supposed to help. She should combine the topical and the L-lysine for best results.

My ex-wife completely wiped hers out by using the L-Lysine approach, limiting certain foods like tomato juice and soft drinks, and just getting into a healthier diet and exercise. She hasn't had a sore in many years now!

Originally posted by TinkerHaus
It sounds like you're talking about oral herpes, which the CDC claims 4/5 people have. I learned this because my son recently contracted oral herpes from his daycare. I was really concerned and felt horrible, then I learned from my doctor that it's SUPER common, and most people have it. Many who do will never show any signs of being a carrier outside of their initial flare up.

There are other fish in the sea, but probably 80% of them have the same problem. If you love her, this seems like a small issue to me.

aye,many people have it,and I was not concerned about developing herpes on my lip,but fact of developing it into potentionally deadly disease scares me :/

You should both visit a clinic for expert advice if you're unsure about stuff. I worked with a girl who had herpes that would flare up now and again. She was happy with a long term boyfriend and completely normal. It's just that word that comes with a stigma.

Good luck.

1. How old are you? I'll say, if you're under 25, move on...not worth the frustration and risk at this point in your life

2. I know a bit about your disease, my ex had it on her scalp...she treated it with meds and a type of oil that broke apart the scaling

that being said, im hoping you dont have it on your junk area...but if that is a case, yes, be watchful of her saliva at any time around your scaling

You should discuss this with your doctor. Knowing how to be careful will make being intimate better without all the worrying.

Originally posted by xNightwing
1. How old are you? I'll say, if you're under 25, move on...not worth the frustration and risk at this point in your life

2. I know a bit about your disease, my ex had it on her scalp...she treated it with meds and a type of oil that broke apart the scaling

that being said, im hoping you dont have it on your junk area...but if that is a case, yes, be watchful of her saliva at any time around your scaling

You should discuss this with your doctor. Knowing how to be careful will make being intimate better without all the worrying.

I am under 25 :/. Ah,this is a very difficult decision . I dont want to dump her, I love her and I dont want to hurt her feelings.

I have it on both scalp and face, it has not developed into scales (I do have dandruff on scalp however, not on face). I do not have it down there .

Damn, this is so frustrating and stressful . I want to stay with her,but at the same time I am afraid I can't .

This issue should definitely be reviewed by a doctor....however, in the mean time, if I were you, I wouldn't allow the areas of dermatitis to be in contact with any areas of hers that she typically breaks out at.

I would go so far as to cover the dermatitis with plastic wrap when being intimate, and she should take L-lysine regularly to keep her herpes at bay. Yes it is totally unromantic and ruins spontaneity, but if you are careless and you come down with the very thing you fear, there is no reversing it.

I don't think you should break up with her because of her herpes, because, depending on where you are in the world, 1/4 of all sexually active adults have herpes (type 2....even more have type 1, oral herpes). If you love her, work with her issues, as well as taking care of your own.

reply to post by Farnhold


This is silly.

Someone posted earlier 80% of the population has this condition. I don't know if it is that high, but I bet it is at least 50%, and in addition to the 50% that get outbreaks there are many more that are carriers and some that are immune.

I was married for 10 years to my ex-wife, and I never developed the sores.

It is pretty obvious when she is contagious, just avoid it during that time.

If you've already dated 4-5 months, then you have likely already been thoroughly exposed anyway.

If you are seriously considering dumping her over this, then you do not love her, and you should dump her. If this thought crossed your mind, without even doing the research first, then you are sub-consciously looking for a reason anyway.

reply to post by Farnhold


You should go on an anti-fungal diet.

Drink anti-fungal teas and tinctures.

Wash your body and scalp with baking soda.

Don't eat wheat, glutinous foods, or refined sugars.

Your skin condition will clear up for sure.

It's going to get more and more difficult to find someone who doesn't have a sexually transmitted disease. The music industry is brainwashing the younger generation that sex is a sport and it's perfectly fine to have meaningless sex with several different people at once.

This video can't be shown enough:


I'm happy you have found someone you're happy with, Farnhold. It's a difficult dilemma.

From the book New Choices in Natural Healing by Bill Gottlieb p. 322-23:

Apply a single drop of tea tree essential oil driectly to the herpes lesions once a day after showering, recommends San Francisco herbalist Jeanne Rose, chairperson of the National Association for Holistic Aromatherapy and author of Aromatherapy: Applications and Inhalations. "Tea tree oil is gentle to the skin and helps any kind of external sore heal faster," says Rose.

"For some people, changing the diet to make it more alkaline can help prevent herpes outbreaks and help get over them more quickly," says Elson Haas, M.D., director of the Preventative Medical Center of Marin in San Rafael, California, and author of Staying Healthy with Nutrition. That means eating more fruits (with exception of citrus fruits, which are too acidic), vegetables, sea vegetables such as kelp and seaweed, millet, seeds and herbs and less meats, fish, eggs, milk products, breads and baked goods, nuts and alcohol, according to Dr. Haas.

Try a wash made from lemon balm, says Varro E. Tyler, Ph.D., professor of pharmacognosy at Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana. The fragrant leaves and flowering tops of the lemon balm plant have antiviral properties, he explains.
To make the wash, Dr. Tyler says you should pour 1/2 cup of boiling water over two to three teaspoons of finely chopped leaves, available in most health food stores. Let it brew for 20 to 30 minutes, then strain it and saturate a clean cotton cloth with the solution. Dr. Tyler suggests applying the wash to herpes lesions three or four times a day.

Another thing I would suggest is taking oil of oregano pills. Just take one each night before bed time. It will kill bad bacteria, but not the good. It will also kill viruses and fungus. You will still want to eat yogurt with live bacteria culture though to keep your system high in good bacteria.

Next, get NATURAL maple syrup and baking soda. Mix them together to make one teaspoon full and take before bedtime. This will kill bad bacteria and viruses. Also, bathe in the baking soda to kill these on your skin. This treatment will help keep your body at a 7.0 pH.

Best wishes!

(If there was a misspelling or grammatical error in the external text, that is my fault as I was typing while reading the words from the actual book.)

Originally posted by Farnhold
I am under 25 :/. Ah,this is a very difficult decision

. I dont want to dump her, I love her and I dont want to hurt her feelings.

I have it on both scalp and face, it has not developed into scales (I do have dandruff on scalp however, not on face). I do not have it down there

.

Damn, this is so frustrating and stressful

. I want to stay with her,but at the same time I am afraid I can't

.

edit on 20-2-2012 by Farnhold because: (no reason given)

Then I doubt you have anything to worry about...unless...shes licking....you face :/ ?

reply to post by Farnhold



Really, it comes down to you, do you OCD (over think) issues like that or is it something you can sweep under the rug... if you can never get over the fact that it's how it is, it's probably the best to move on, for both your sakes...

I only mention this because it kind of seems that you would use this as a way out of the relationship…. Because if you do a quick search on Eczema herpeticum (which I just did) you could postulate that basically what it is, is herpes of the skin (like on your arm or chest).
It’s the herpes virus… not a hybrid of herpes and eczema viruses….

This condition is most commonly caused by herpes simplex virus type 1 or 2, but may also be caused by coxsackievirus A16, or vaccinia virus.[1]

Also the chances of having it…

Eczema herpeticumama is a rare but severe disseminated infection

And it seems even if you did happen to become one of these rare cases, your chances of death are even slimmer….

Can be life threatening in babies

My wife gets outbreaks (as well as every 1 out of 4 people, it's a really common disease, like HPV is) and I've been with her for 11 years and have never had an outbreak. We make sure never to kiss until it has fully healed. It's kind of nice because I HAVE to wait to kiss her and it actually brings some excitement into the relationship... sometimes i forget and go into give her a kiss and she gives me her forehead or cheek... I just re-formulate the whole scenario to those days of cat and mouse with a girl (the ones that play hard to get).

Life is what you make it... Certain issues that can put one person over the edge can be inconsequential to someone else.

Originally posted by JohnnyTHSeed
reply to post by Farnhold

 

You should go on an anti-fungal diet.

Drink anti-fungal teas and tinctures.

Wash your body and scalp with baking soda.

Don't eat wheat, glutinous foods, or refined sugars.

Your skin condition will clear up for sure.

Thanks for your suggestion, I have been trying out lots of different things for my seberrhoeic dermatitis, nothing worked so far, I still have it .
I may try that, unfortunately, I do not have bathtube :/.

Originally posted by xNightwing

Originally posted by Farnhold
I am under 25 :/. Ah,this is a very difficult decision

. I dont want to dump her, I love her and I dont want to hurt her feelings.

I have it on both scalp and face, it has not developed into scales (I do have dandruff on scalp however, not on face). I do not have it down there

.

Damn, this is so frustrating and stressful

. I want to stay with her,but at the same time I am afraid I can't

.

edit on 20-2-2012 by Farnhold because: (no reason given)

Then I doubt you have anything to worry about...unless...shes licking....you face :/ ?

She doesn't lick my face, but kissing it is very regular.

Originally posted by FORMe2p00p0n
reply to post by Farnhold

 

Really, it comes down to you, do you OCD (over think) issues like that or is it something you can sweep under the rug... if you can never get over the fact that it's how it is, it's probably the best to move on, for both your sakes...

I only mention this because it kind of seems that you would use this as a way out of the relationship…. Because if you do a quick search on Eczema herpeticum (which I just did) you could postulate that basically what it is, is herpes of the skin (like on your arm or chest).
It’s the herpes virus… not a hybrid of herpes and eczema viruses….

This condition is most commonly caused by herpes simplex virus type 1 or 2, but may also be caused by coxsackievirus A16, or vaccinia virus.[1]

Also the chances of having it…

Eczema herpeticumama is a rare but severe disseminated infection

And it seems even if you did happen to become one of these rare cases, your chances of death are even slimmer….

Can be life threatening in babies

My wife gets outbreaks (as well as every 1 out of 4 people, it's a really common disease, like HPV is) and I've been with her for 11 years and have never had an outbreak. We make sure never to kiss until it has fully healed. It's kind of nice because I HAVE to wait to kiss her and it actually brings some excitement into the relationship... sometimes i forget and go into give her a kiss and she gives me her forehead or cheek... I just re-formulate the whole scenario to those days of cat and mouse with a girl (the ones that play hard to get).

Life is what you make it... Certain issues that can put one person over the edge can be inconsequential to someone else.

Aye mate, I do OCD, I am hypochondriac. I am definitely not looking for a reason to end relationship, actually, I wanted to preserve it, and I even got over the fact that she has HPV1, and risk that I could get it as well. It wouldnt make me happy if I got it on my lip, but I could live with it. But when we are talking about serious condition like this... I do have second thoughts .

I did look at many EH links, not just quick search, and there they recommend to avoid contact with person who has HPV if you have eczema because of the risk. It is rare, but that doesn't mean it may not show up. It is life threatening even to adults, and if not treated early, it may develop into chronic condition. It also may you scar pretty badly.

reply to post by Farnhold


There is a HPV vaccine but it sounds to me like you subconsciously already made your decision... and it's probably for the best, she can then find someone who isn't as concerned about those issues, and will love her for who she is, not what she is... and you can move on to locate a person without a disease...

and although I really hate to say this to a "HC", just remember there are people out there with HIV (you'll never know they have it without a test) and Hep A (contagious via mouth)

I hope you work it out and good luck with your future decision


Me, I still stand by my decision to marry my wife and wouldn't change it for the world...

10 out of 10 people die... and a normal dude with no STD's can die a miserable death due to a plethora of diseases just from fleas, masquitos, ticks, rats, pigeons

Originally posted by FORMe2p00p0n
reply to post by Farnhold

 

There is a HPV vaccine but it sounds to me like you subconsciously already made your decision... and it's probably for the best, she can then find someone who isn't as concerned about those issues, and will love her for who she is, not what she is... and you can move on to locate a person without a disease...

and although I really hate to say this to a "HC", just remember there are people out there with HIV (you'll never know they have it without a test) and Hep A (contagious via mouth)

I hope you work it out and good luck with your future decision


Me, I still stand by my decision to marry my wife and wouldn't change it for the world...

10 out of 10 people die... and a normal dude with no STD's can die a miserable death due to a plethora of diseases just from fleas, masquitos, ticks, rats, pigeons

edit on 20-2-2012 by FORMe2p00p0n because: (no reason given)

Dude, I love her for who she is, if I would not, I wouldn't be with her in first place. I had no problems until I found out about Eczema Herpeticum (EH). I thought worst thing I could get was a lip herpes (she has HPV1), and that was something I could live with. You may have not gotten a herpes, not only because you avoided kissing your wife (which me and my gf did as well, even then there is still a chance), but also because your immunity is stronger than mine. Seberrhoeic Dermatitis is a immunity disorder, that means that my immunity is weakened, my chances are therefore higher. And regarding EH, even if the chances are low of getting it,they are still there. And it has potential lifelong and lifethreatening problems. Not only that, once you get it, you also threaten others, because there is a chance of passing it onto others, and that is something I do not want. If that scenario happened, I would not be with her anyway, and I would risk infecting her with it as well.
I love her, but I do not want to risk it for both of us.

And regarding vaccines, I guess you know that vaccines are dangerous, right?