McDonalds is the Key to Immortality & Ascension

Wiley Brooks deserves a second look. The self described breatharian claims immortality and ascension require a strict limited ingredient diet of a double quarter pounder with cheese, french fries with a diet coke, preferably eaten while at McDonalds. Check it out:
www.breatharian.com...

I know he's been covered on ats before, but I couldn't resist. Don't miss the workshop page either.

Wow. I must admit to being unable to not read that site's blatherings!!!

I can't figure out whether I should continue laughing, start crying, or go to Mickey-D's....

Hilarious/Terrifying thread!

S&F

reply to post by sayaangel


I knew it, Ronald and the Hamburglar are at it again offering free trips the the 5th dimension.

reply to post by sayaangel

1. Jot Niranjan

2. Omkar

3. Rarankar

4. Sohang

5. Sat Nam

Start meditating with these magic words for at least 30 minutes a day to begin with and increase your meditatiing time to 2 hours a day as soon as possible. Repeat them in the exact order that they are.

I've been doing it all wrong, I thought the magic words were...

Klaatu

Barata

Nikto

Curse you Bruce Campbell!

And seeing how McDonald's food doesn't decay, it makes sense that getting your cellular structure attuned to their foods would produce immortality.


ETA- Thanks for the spelling correction grey580

reply to post by JibbyJedi


Klaatu barada blearghcoughcough!



LOL.

And I was just at mcdonalds this morning.
I'm well on my way to ascension.

Originally posted by JibbyJedi
reply to post by sayaangel

 

1. Jot Niranjan

2. Omkar

3. Rarankar

4. Sohang

5. Sat Nam

Start meditating with these magic words for at least 30 minutes a day to begin with and increase your meditatiing time to 2 hours a day as soon as possible. Repeat them in the exact order that they are.

I've been doing it all wrong, I thought the magic words were...

Clatu

Verata

Nictu

Curse you Bruce Campbell!

And seeing how McDonald's food doesn't decay, it makes sense that getting your cellular structure attuned to their foods would produce immortality.

That

is

FLIPPIN'

Hilarious!

Thanks, I needed a good laugh before heading off to work.

It is better to have some diet coke in your bloodstream (if possible) before starting the meditation exercise. You may drink as much as you desire of diet coke in the 20 oz and 1 liter sizes and at McDonald's (with caffeine) in the plastic bottles only. The double-quarter-pounder/with cheese meal at McDonald's is the other part this diet. Try to eat at least one meal a day for a while to get started. Go back to my web site periodically to see if you can start to feel the magic (The energy from my writings) after reading a few paragraphs.

I love this part, "See if you can start to feel the magic" I dunno after a Mickey D's diet coke and a quarter pounder I kinda feel more like throwing up than seeing if the magic's working.

Ascension? Wow!
And all this time I thought it just gave me gas...

From the website.

"EMPOWERED ASCENSION" or IMMORTALITY

INITIATION WORKSHOPS BY WILEY BROOKS,

BREATHARIAN AND FOUNDER OF The Breatharian Institute of America

To do this workshop you must be able to spend at least 5 days traveling to special places in the four corner states.

The workshop includes a visit to Earth Prime in the 5th Dimension in your physical body if you are ready.

As of December 10,2011 The cost of the workshop is $1,000,000.00 USD

The process starts with a $100,000.00 USD deposit which must be received 30 days before beginning date of workshop. Click on Payment Information sub-tab

NO REFUNDS

In case you wanted some in depth immersion, I wonder if that includes meals...

reply to post by sayaangel


Is there talk of exercise in this book because eating all that fast food is unhealthy physically, which we all know. So eating 1 quarter pounder a day is a lot Micky D's, especially with fries. They recommend you drink diet coke before you mediate? Huh?

Dammit...I'll never ascend...don't eat at Mickey D's

reply to post by JibbyJedi
[more
Bruce was the perfect addition to this

reply to post by clowdstalker


I'm guessing it's 4 McDonalds locations...

Originally posted by sayaangel
Wiley Brooks deserves a second look. The self described breatharian claims immortality and ascension require a strict limited ingredient diet of a double quarter pounder with cheese, french fries with a diet coke, preferably eaten while at McDonalds.

If you buy 10 of those meals does it come with a free angioplasty?
Double quarter pounder with cheese and a DIET coke.....

Or in France...RoyAL with cheese

Ok I needed this I was burning out on ATS today...Oddly the customers of MacDo look preserved so dead or alive the body might out last a twinkie.


HAIL TO THE GOLDEN ARCHES OF ELIGHTENMENT!

KFC 4 life...

ive ascended many times inside mcdonalds and heck one time i even got to keep the underwear i was wearing!

I am ashamed of myself. I nominated another thread for silliest of the week. This is the winner for the month.

Thanks for the contribution.

reply to post by Open2Truth


Thank you! I couldn't not share this, it's still cracking me up hours later.

Do you get that in a happy meal as a gift, or is it available by request?

Also is it only available after 11-30???