Arguments to make bible bashers leave me alone

reply to post by nutzmctaffy


For the record: I am an agnostic, but I think that Father Firecrotch should lead a Christian (R)Evolution;
the results of which would include: followers of Jesus that keep their religion to themselves, and fewer folks crying on the side of the road!

Written just now; by me: for you....

Faithfully, they flock to Father Firecrotch-
and slowly up the ladder Christians go a notch!
if he stays tried-and-true,
the crazies won't be botherin' you...
(...then we'll get the Ginger Priest a congratulations watch!)



Excellent, Civil Thread! S&F!

(this is not sarcastic; good people do good deeds...simple logic-the world becomes better! Father Firecrotch for Space Pope 2025!!!)

Well I get alot of Jehova's witnesses at my door, so many in fact that I have printed the covers of The book of Mormon and the Satanic Bible, and put them around old books I had.

When they come to the door, I say hold on while I grab a book you guys should check out. I then whip out either of the ones below.

They are so quick to leave its hilarious.

1.bp.blogspot.com...
www.mormonmemorabilia.com...

The old geezer who used to spout fire and brimstone in the center of town is long gone.
The Mormons and Jovo's give me a wide berth these days, have done for years. The local vicar of my childhood RE lessons sadly died a good 16 years back. He was a lovely fella and always took the fact we didn't agree on things with good humour, resigned to the fact his star pupil at school grew into a godless heathen but looked forward to me showing my face for the odd wedding or funeral. St Mary's isn't the same since he died.


We just don't get the quality of bible nut the OP does here.

Originally posted by Pixiefyre
I saw this posted somewhere a couple of years ago and saved it thinking it was rather humorous hope you like it too

Source is no longer known

1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, the Bible tells me it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev.1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them in the least. Should I smite them?

2. One of my friends would like to sell his daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. She’s a Yale graduate, speaks fluent French and is very computer literate. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. Leviticus 25:44-46 clearly states that we may indeed possess slaves, both male and female (and we can even leave them to the kids in our Wills … in perpetuity). However, they have to be purchased from neighboring nations. A good Christian friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. I would much prefer owning a Canuck. So why can’t I own Canadians? Can you clarify, please?

4. I know that I am forbidden to have any contact whatsoever with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness – even to sitting on a chair where she had previously sat (Lev.15:19-24). The problem at the office is, how is one supposed to know these things? It seems like merely asking causes them to take great offense.

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should this be a neighborhood activity?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality (s.v., your earlier Leviticus citing). Me? I’m not so sure of that. Is being gay or a crustacean cruncher-muncher worse?

7. Leviticus 21:18-21 has numerous restrictions about who exactly can approach the altar to worship God, but I’m focusing on the one concerning if I have a defect in my eye. I have to admit that I wear glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

8. Most of the guys I know shave on a daily basis, get their hair trimmed regularly and some even have tattoos – although these are all expressly forbidden (Lev. 19:27-28). How should they die?

9. I know from Leviticus 11:7-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes a man unclean. So exactly what kind of brutal Biblical punishment do you think the NCAA and NFL should be meting out to all those big, burly football players? (And is wearing gloves, like some receivers and backs do, a possible loophole?)

10. My uncle has a farm. Year in and year out, he violates Leviticus 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field; as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (she really likes that all-season linen and wool blend). Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them (Lev. 24:14)? Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family gathering like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

11. Big stones or little stones? I live in a neighborhood with LOTS and LOTS of stubborn and rebellious male adolescents. Although Deuteronomy 21:18-22 is perfectly clear they should be stoned to death, my question are pebbles or boulders the accepted mode?

Print this out and pass it out as a pamphlet to the preachers OP...I cried I laughed so hard!

It's also interesting to note Judges 1:19- And the LORD was with Judah; and he drave out the inhabitants of the mountain; but could not drive out the inhabitants of the valley, because they had chariots of iron.

Waa??? Can't defeat iron chariots..we have tanks now.

Also, why did 1/3 of the host of heaven pick Lucifier's side?

Why did the angels want to get funky with earth women and come down and make bodies for themselves if residing in heaven was so fabulous?

Why is it that when Lucifier told Adam and Eve their eyes would become open and they would know good from bad after eating from the 'tree of knowledge' they actually had their eyes opened and realized, yo we are naked?

Good questions to stump a christian with long enough for you to make your get away.

A good video series from a former Christian who became an Atheist. I recommend watching the entire thing.

"Why I am No Longer a Christian - Video Series"

I have linked a couple of the videos below that explain the basic issues with the Bible in regards to the history of God.

Originally posted by pixiekaram
G'day,

I live in a town where many of these people frequently stand on hours on end trying to force they're beliefs on people trying to use public transport (trains/buses massive station) and people walking by trying to mind they're own business.

I get that people are allowed to believe in whatever they want, however I do not condone them trying to thrust/hassle people into believing them and converting them people have the right to make their own decisions in their own time.

They frequently hassle me and it is both catholic and christians so what arguments could I make to p**s them off or just to give up entirely? for either side

Thanks in advance

and sorry mods didnt know where to post this.

Edit: Sorry I ment I wanted to mass debate them (pun intented) so their stupid jaws drop and walk away

edit on 5-10-2011 by pixiekaram because: (no reason given)

just kill one or take them hostage.


what, too much of a wuss?

I opened my door yesterday to an elderly couple and the man had a bible in his hand. I was irritated that they'd come to my door to 'sell' me something I have no interest in. It's not in me to be rude, so I politely told them "no thanks" and shut the door.

I hold the same disdain for these people who come to my door to sell their religion in the same category I place those annoying sales people in the mall who won't let you walk away from them until they force their sales pitch on you. And the telemarketers who call at all hours trying to sell you something, or the stupid commercials on
tv that run every 1/2 hour, over and over again trying to sell something that will never do what they say it will, and
the extremely annoying ads put on web sites and video's that take up or block what you are looking at.

I would never buy anything from any of these mediums. Don't force your crap on me and expect me to buy it. It only makes me irritated and it gets you on my "Do not buy from" list. If what you are selling is THAT good, merchandise or religion, it should speak for itself and it shouldn't need to be aggressively pushed in your face.

reply to post by RoswellCityLimits


LMAO Roswellcitylimits..

Speacepope huh LMAO..

But you know something.... 100% truthfully

My Grandparents are very famous Pastors in the christian faith... so famous I would never reveal their names...

But because it was THEM.... who shunned me out of the church for having long hair and tattoos...and being real

I was always told my by them through my life that god had a HUGE calling for me and that I was called to be a pastor... but I never wanted too....

I can always hope and pray that my REAL message shakes people on the inside....

as I always said I keep it real... always have and always will I refuse to Bow to " religion"

I would Bow to Jesus Christ and worship at his feet... and anyone that understands Jesus's teachings knows that he would not let me stay on my knees he would lift me to my feet so we could be eye level...

thanks for the support Roswell

Maybe this is how I reach people... and maybe this is how god had planned it...

until next time

Nutz McTaffy
ATS token Ginger

Firecrotch out

reply to post by virraszto


Bibles should always be free... I have HUGE problems HUGE PHUCKIN PROBLEMS with people that use GOD as a buisness front... no wonder why our generation is so Lost.. It's because of the older generation who was taught by their parents , parents , parents and so on...

Be safe and Saty in the Light friend don't let these Religious folks keep you from Gods True Favor and Glory

firecrotch out

Smack them in the face.

Originally posted by Pixiefyre


5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should this be a neighborhood activity?


8. Most of the guys I know shave on a daily basis, get their hair trimmed regularly and some even have tattoos – although these are all expressly forbidden (Lev. 19:27-28). How should they die?

lol omg stop killing me, i'm dieing of laughter. So the New Testament don't have these? why do they take these out?

reply to post by pixiekaram


wow...you must really be convicted of your sins and scared to die in order to come on here begging for ways to escape the "horrors" of Christian evangelism.... Just take there paper and smile. Do you really need to do anything else? kids....

reply to post by Ozvaldo


You will not find Jesus saying one thing about homosexuality one way or the other. You can conclude that being a Jew of his time his thoughts on the subject would be within the norms but that is about it. He did however have lots to say concerning greed, infidelity and a variety of other things yet somehow gay people didn't make his radar.

I am a Disciple of Christ... I can't stand it when " Bible Thumping Preachers" scream at people to join their religion I have always had a HUGE problem with this which is why I do not call myself a christian even though I follow Jesus.,. I just don't think god would be happy with someone screaming at you that u are going to hell if you don't convert True Followers of Jesus .... Follow Him ... and Jesus taught Love and acceptance of everyone.. If I ever saw someone falling I would reach out to you.. but with a gentle hand and never squeeze.. Be safe and god bless

reply to post by nutzmctaffy


You don't think GOD would be happy with someone screaming at you that u are going to hell if you don't convert?
Did GOD send John the Baptist or not? Did he not scream 'REPENT' at the people passing by who stopped to observe his strange behaviour? Did he force anyone to repent?
I thought the reason GOD sent Jesus was because people WERE going to hell and He wanted to prevent that by sending a Saviour who would be the atonement for their sins. People wont know to turn from their sins if noone tells them. Maybe you perceive such people as self righteous? Well, maybe some of them are. But if truth be told, they are just as 'sinful' as the people they are yelling 'REPENT' to. The only difference is that they have the 'Righteousness of Christ' upon them, and His blood to cover them. Nothing they did to earn that. A drowning man in a sea of drowning people finds a life raft. He didn't build it/make it. He has no reason to be smug. He should be doing his best to share the raft with others in the same situation. After all, he knows from EXPERIENCE what it is to be drowning.
If you genuinely believed you had the answers to life, to purpose and fulfillment, wouldn't YOU be out there broadcasting it to everyone in the hope that they might 'get it' too?
Have you read the parable of the sower? Bottom line, there are different kinds of people out there. The message you share will not necessarily take root in or bring fruit out of everyone. That's not your problem or responsibility. Throw the seed. It lands where it will. You've done your bit. Not my responsibility to make it grow in the ground.
Jesus loves me, and He loves you too. Some people will always be offended by that. I make no apology.

I was born and raised Methodist. I'm 38. I have a love of God but I also believe every religion is indeed correct. I still wince when people talk bad about God as it's in my blood to revere Him.

Now on that note. Back in 2000 or so, I was living with my ex Dave. Now Dave had long black hair, was a total metal head. Total. Before I moved in to his apartment, he'd warned me that a lot of Jehovah's came to his apartment building. I was like meh, no biggie. And moved in.

Dunno how long it was after but one afternoon Dave-o was in the shower and I was watching tv when a knock came. Yup. THE knock. I went and told Dave who gave a huge sigh. Next thing I knew, he'd walked out of the bathroom, towel wrapped about his hips. He picked up my black cat Pookey, held him ass end forward so his tail was up and out of the way, opened the door and yelled, " WHAT? I'M F..........N BUSY!"


They NEVER bothered us again. I STILL laugh when I think about it.

reply to post by pixiekaram


Well, to make the best argument to make them leave you alone you can always try making the worst arguments.
"How are you certain air is real?"
"If evolution were a natural law, why are there still monkeys"
"Have you ever noticed how well a banana fits in your hand?"
"Why is it that I never find new life in a jar of peanut butter"
A failure in reasoning should provide a loss of interest.

Better yet, just stay off the subject if you want to be left alone because if you make an argument then you will be welcoming attention.

Originally posted by pixiekaram
G'day,

I live in a town where many of these people frequently stand on hours on end trying to force they're beliefs on people trying to use public transport (trains/buses massive station) and people walking by trying to mind they're own business.

I get that people are allowed to believe in whatever they want, however I do not condone them trying to thrust/hassle people into believing them and converting them people have the right to make their own decisions in their own time.

They frequently hassle me and it is both catholic and christians so what arguments could I make to p**s them off or just to give up entirely? for either side

Thanks in advance

and sorry mods didnt know where to post this.

Edit: Sorry I ment I wanted to mass debate them (pun intented) so their stupid jaws drop and walk away

edit on 5-10-2011 by pixiekaram because: (no reason given)

No need for the hateful feelings, sister (or brother...). Why try to drag someone into an argument like that? The bottom line is, God and Jesus love you, and they will use people to reach others who are not saved yet. Instead of hating the person who is talking to you, just pray about it and ask Jesus into your heart.

If you really want to argue with Religious Zealots my advice to you is to take the time to actually read the Bible. There is no shortage of points you can make for your argument, plus it helps to know what you are talking about when your average religious zealot makes a counter point, which they always do. Just know now, if you want to argue you will find an argument. So is it worth to you?

Some days I argue. I get some people from a local Church who seem to like knocking on my door early Saturday morning to tell me how to get saved. I work nights. So there have been times I have grabbed a bible and debated them, then there have been times where my sleep is much more important and I thank them, take their silly literature, get them to leave and go back to bed.

Originally posted by jeramie
No need for the hateful feelings, sister (or brother...). Why try to drag someone into an argument like that? The bottom line is, God and Jesus love you, and they will use people to reach others who are not saved yet. Instead of hating the person who is talking to you, just pray about it and ask Jesus into your heart.

and yet oddly enough you can get the exact same results by praying to the Grinch who stole Christmas and asking him into your heart

Plus he comes with a cool dog who has antlers glued to his head

It comes down to what you accept, this sounds pretty wonderful to me.
If it turns out not to be true, I am still going with it. I am not drawn to most of the previous commentary in this thread, it was so negative and mocking.

= = =

Divine Mercy Illumination

Messages from Heaven received via interior locution.
Friday, October 21, 2011

You Were Created Out Of Love

October 20, 2011
I want to speak to you of my great love. My Father is love and I am His keeper. We work together for the kingdom. Many evils are at hand today. Abortions, pornography, disease and my great love can heal. When you start from the beginning, I healed Adam and Eve with my great love. I can do the same today. You must turn away from evil and come to me so I can heal you. When in doubt, look no further than your heart and find me there. I am the great I Am. Just be with me and I can heal you. I show my children many sides of myself. Love is a great part of me. It can heal all things, remember this. No evil can destroy my love. My vine is full of a great harvest for those who come to me. Only true love can heal a multitude of sins. Love is instilled in all of you. You were created out of love, and great love you do have. It is united to me. My power will help you see the light in love. It is a great light burning bright. Evil cannot extinguish it. My children are saved through great love. A love that only I can give. When you are feeling sorrow or trouble, remember my love. It will carry you. It is always there, my child. You can imagine my love when you feel love for a child. My love is exemplified in that love. I want the best for my children. Whatsoever is good, fair, and kind brings forth love. It is a powerful gift. A gift the world cannot give. Look to others and bring them love for me. I love you.

Love, Jesus

divinemercyillumination.blogspot.com...