The Case for Satan (Let the Defense speak)

"Order in the court, order in the court!"

The jury, assembled of 6 Christians and 6 Atheists, are seated in the court, each with a tinge of nervousness as they are about to decide on the case of all cases: Was Satan really the bad guy?

They had been ordered not to speak on the issues with peers, to include church members or even blog groups. Each juror has been given the very bible itself to help in deciding the case. They have been warned against any (further) propaganda by members of clergy, and another factor had to be clarified; the atheists had to accept that once in the courtroom, the Lord God and Lucifer (Satan, devil) did in fact exist, and the Christians had to accept the words of the very book they hold to be true, and not distort the facts as they please

The World vs. Satan, for the crimes of slavery, rape, kidnapping, torture, lies and MASS MURDER

On the side of the prosecution are the Lord God and his attorney.

On the side of the defense is Lucifer (aka Satan), a 3rd of the Angels, Eve, and the surviving members of humanity after the Deluge.

I, ButterCookie, am litigating on behalf of the Defense.

ButterCookie: “Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, yesterday we heard the prosecution speak. Today, I am going to, and perhaps this will be the first time in recorded history, allow my client, the defense to speak.”
“My client intends to prove his innocence for major crimes in humanity, including kidnapping, rape, torture, slavery, and most of all MURDER. He has also been charged with being the ‘father of lies’, which in itself is outright slander of my client’s name, and today I intend to show the court that not only is my client completely innocent , but that the claimant, LORD GOD is actually the guilty party. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s remove the negative stigma placed on my client for a millennia and get to the bottom of the true terrorist of the bible. Forget the propaganda and myths you have been indoctrinated to believe about my client, and use our critical and rational thinking on today.

Thank you. I now would like to call on my first witness, Eve.”

Eve approaches the bench. She swears in (ironically in the bible) and jeers at the Lord God from the corner of her eye. The fear she has held for him has started to diminish…..

ButterCookie: “Ma’am, could you state your name for the court.”

Eve: “I really don’t have one, but you may call me ‘Eve’. See, I am only one of the prototypes of the first female ‘human’ species…..it was known as the Eve Project, but history has been ‘adjusted’ to look like there was only one of me….”

Juror 6, a Christian, looks very puzzled.

ButterCookie: “Thank you. Eve, could you describe for the court your role in ‘Genesis’?”

Eve: “Sure. Basically, we (again there were many of us early prototypes) toiled the garden….that was our purpose. And one day……”

ButterCookie: “I’m sorry Eve, many of the jury members may not understand what is meant by ‘toil’. Could you describe in more detail?”

Eve: “Oh of course. As it is stated in Genesis 2:15, God saw that there was no one to till the soil, meaning to cultivate it, and make it proper for vegetation. Mainly though, tilling was also extracting gold from the gold mines in Africa.”

Juror 6, again looks puzzled.

ButterCookie: ‘I see. So in other words, mankind was created for slavery.”

Prosecution: “I object. Slavery has such a negative connotation”

Judge: “Objection overruled. Continue counsel.”

ButterCookie: “Thank you, your honor. So Eve, was it in fact slavery?”

Eve: “Yes it was.”

ButterCookie: “Please continue on with the ‘Genesis’ situation”.

Eve: “Yes. So we were tilling the soil in the hot gold mines of Africa when one of the gods….well you all know him as ‘Satan’, approached us, and addressed the inhumane treatment that we were getting. The conditions became unbearable and we would be whipped from time to time by the gods if our work was not up to par.”

Juror 6: (Gods???)

Eve: “We would slave from sun up to sun down with little food…..some of the gods would capture us sleep with us against our will…”

Prosecution: “Are you suggesting that my client kidnapped and raped humans? I object!”

Judge: “Objection sustained……Counsel, can you in fact state any biblical references to rape or allowance of rape and kidnapping by the Lord God?”

ButterCookie: “Certainly, your honor. To name a few:

(Judges 21:10-24 NLT)
So they sent twelve thousand warriors to Jabesh-gilead with orders to kill everyone there, including women and children. "This is what you are to do," they said. "Completely destroy all the males and every woman who is not a virgin." Among the residents of Jabesh-gilead they found four hundred young virgins who had never slept with a man, and they brought them to the camp at Shiloh in the land of Canaan.

(Numbers 31:7-18 NLT)
They attacked Midian just as the LORD had commanded Moses, and they killed all the men. All five of the Midianite kings – Evi, Rekem, Zur, Hur, and Reba – died in the battle. They also killed Balaam son of Beor with the sword. Then the Israelite army captured the Midianite women and children and seized their cattle and flocks and all their wealth as plunder. They burned all the towns and villages where the Midianites had lived. After they had gathered the plunder and captives, both people and animals, they brought them all to Moses and Eleazar the priest, and to the whole community of Israel, which was camped on the plains of Moab beside the Jordan River, across from Jericho.

Moses, Eleazar the priest, and all the leaders of the people went to meet them outside the camp. But Moses was furious with all the military commanders who had returned from the battle. "Why have you let all the women live?" he demanded. "These are the very ones who followed Balaam's advice and caused the people of Israel to rebel against the LORD at Mount Peor. They are the ones who caused the plague to strike the LORD's people. Now kill all the boys and all the women who have slept with a man. Only the young girls who are virgins may live; you may keep them for yourselves.

(Deuteronomy 20:10-14)
As you approach a town to attack it, first offer its people terms for peace. If they accept your terms and open the gates to you, then all the people inside will serve you in forced labor. But if they refuse to make peace and prepare to fight, you must attack the town. When the LORD your God hands it over to you, kill every man in the town. But you may keep for yourselves all the women, children, livestock, and other plunder. You may enjoy the spoils of your enemies that the LORD your God has given you.

(Deuteronomy 21:10-14 NAB)
"When you go out to war against your enemies and the LORD, your God, delivers them into your hand, so that you take captives, if you see a comely woman among the captives and become so enamored of her that you wish to have her as wife, you may take her home to your house. But before she may live there, she must shave her head and pare her nails and lay aside her captive's garb. After she has mourned her father and mother for a full month, you may have relations with her, and you shall be her husband and she shall be your wife. However, if later on you lose your liking for her, you shall give her her freedom, if she wishes it; but you shall not sell her or enslave her, since she was married to you under compulsion."

(Cont'd)

(Judges 5:30 NAB)
They must be dividing the spoils they took: there must be a damsel or two for each man, Spoils of dyed cloth as Sisera's spoil, an ornate shawl or two for me in the spoil. (Judges 5:30 NAB)

(Exodus 21:7-11 NLT)
When a man sells his daughter as a slave, she will not be freed at the end of six years as the men are. If she does not please the man who bought her, he may allow her to be bought back again. But he is not allowed to sell her to foreigners, since he is the one who broke the contract with her. And if the slave girl's owner arranges for her to marry his son, he may no longer treat her as a slave girl, but he must treat her as his daughter. If he himself marries her and then takes another wife, he may not reduce her food or clothing or fail to sleep with her as his wife. If he fails in any of these three ways, she may leave as a free woman without making any payment.
(Exodus 21:7-11 NLT)


(Zechariah 14:1-2 NAB)

Lo, a day shall come for the Lord when the spoils shall be divided in your midst. And I will gather all the nations against Jerusalem for battle: the city shall be taken, houses plundered, women ravished; half of the city shall go into exile, but the rest of the people shall not be removed from the city. (Zechariah 14:1-2 NAB)
(Juror 6 has now passed out and had to be removed from the courtroom)

Judge: “Uhhh…..no need to continue ButterCookie. That will be enough.”

ButterCookie: “Please continue, Eve.”

Eve: “Well Satan, one of the many gods, came to discuss our working conditions. He showed empathy and agreed that we were being mistreated, and that he didn’t like it at all. He then proceeded to give us knowledge….you all refer to it as ‘biting of the tree of knowledge and wisdom. So you see, it was no literal apple, just an ancient symbolism for knowledge. This was the very apple that the Lord God forbade us to ‘eat’ from.

I quickly informed Satan that we had been warned against learning any knowledge, never to ‘bite’ of that apple. Satan told me that it would be ok, that he was actually planning a revolt. I was still afraid, and told him that the Lord God said I’d die if I did. Satan was perplexed this time, stating that was very untrue, that I had been lied to, and that the only thing that would happen is we would have our ‘eyes opened’ and be like one of them (the gods). So……
I went for it. I took in all the knowledge that Satan was able to provide in that short period of time. He had to quickly do this because Lord God would soon be coming to check on us slaves, and would be very upset at Satan even talking to us slaves. After all, the gods were supposed to be cruel and ruthless, just like him (points to the Lord God). The Lord God would have no part in a god being cozy with us slaves.”
Juror 5, another Christian is shocked. She stares at the Lord God from the juror box with a confused look.
Eve: So then here comes Lord God, stomping through Eden, and HIGHLY UPSET at the conversation he is sees taking place between Satan and us slaves. The Lord God asks what in the world is going on and shouts at Satan for ‘enlightening’. Actually, this is when he starting to be referred to as SATAN, meaning enemy of the Lord God. Up until then, he is simply referred to as ‘God’, just like the others.”

ButterCookie: “Thank you for the testimony, Eve. You may now exit the witness stand.”

Lord God, to his attorney in a whisper: (That two-timing slut!!! I’ll fix her…..)

ButterCookie: “Your honor, I would now like to call the defendant himself, Satan, to the stand.”
Satan approached the witness the stand, looks around the courtroom, especially peering at the Lord God.

ButterCookie: “Good morning, Mr…..what shall I call you for today’s purposes?”
Satan: “I like the name Lucifer better, a nickname given to me by humanity during the biblical era. Please note, the Lord God is the only biblical person to refer to me as ‘satan’, meaning ‘enemy’….because, well….I WAS his enemy. I did not like the tyrannical and ruthless behavior he showed toward humanity.”
Juror 5, even more confused, stares at Satan.

ButterCookie: “Thank you. Can you briefly list the facts of this case, as they relate to the crimes of murder, rape, torture, kidnapping, and slavery?”

Satan: “With pleasure.”

I would like to start my testimony by stating that no, my real name is not Satan. However, I have been labeled with that name, because it does mean ‘enemy’. I was a part of the Earth mission along with the Lord God and the angels (administrative staff) to the other high ranking commanders. We were all scientists who headed to planet Earth on a gold-mining expedition to extract gold from the area now known as ‘Africa’. Upon arrival, we noticed the difficulty in the African terrain as we were not prepared for the long hours in the hot desert sun in the gold mines. There had been many creatures that had evolved by then and the one that had the capabilities of

with a plan.

Genesis 1:26- Let us make mankind in our image, according to our likeness.
In other words, let’s fashion a hybrid creature (with our own DNA) to get this work done for us, more efficiently.
The other gods agreed and so that begin the Adamu project (adamu, Hebrew for ‘worker’)……you all know it as ‘Adam’……”

Jurors 1-5 and 7-12 are shocked

Eve, or that’s what you all know her as, described perfectly the purpose for this new creature…mankind/human….hybrid worker. Yes, I admit that there sole purpose was to till the soil and work for the gods. However, because I was the Adamu Project leader, I began to grow sympathy for the slaves….after all, my DNA was used in the early stages of this project. I hated to see the women captured and rape. Slaves were being tortured and murdered even for the smallest of things:

ButterCookie: “Your honor, allow me to present Exhibit 1 entitled “The Murders of Lord God”

Judge: “Proceed.”

Old and New Testament


Number Killed

Cumulative Total
God drowns everyone on earth (except Noah and his family)

Genesis 7:23

30,000,000

30,000,000
God rains fire and brimstone on Sodom and Gomorrah, killing everyone.

Gen.19:24

1000

30,001,000
Lot’s wife for looking back

Gen.19:26

1

30,001,001
Er who was “wicked in the sight of the Lord”

Gen.38:7, 1 Chr.2:3

1

30,001,002
Onan for spilling his seed

Gen.38:10

1

30,001,003
7th Egyptian Plague: Hail

Exodus 9:25

30,000

30,031,003
God kills every Egyptian firstborn child.

Ex.12:29-30

500,000

30,531,003
God drowns Egyptian army

Ex.14:28

1000

30,532,003
God and Moses help Joshua kill the Amalekites

Ex.17:13

1000

30,533,003
For dancing naked around Aaron’s golden calf

Ex.32:27-28, 35

3000

30,536,003
Aaron’s sons for offering strange fire before the Lord

Lev.10:1-3, Num.3:4, 26:61

2

30,536,005
A blasphemer

Lev.24:10-23

1

30,536,006
God burned to death an unknown number for complaining

Numbers 11:1

100

30,536,106
God sent “a very great plague” for complaining about the food.

Num.11:33

10,000

30,546,106
God killed those who murmured with a plague.

Num.14:35-36

100

30,546,206
A man who picked up sticks on the Sabbath

Num.15:32-36

1

30,546,207
Korah, Dathan, and Abiram (and their families)

Num.16:27

12+

30,546,219
Burned to death for offering incense

Num.16:35, 26:10

250

30,546,469
For complaining

Num.16:49

14,700

30,561,169
Massacre of the Aradites

Num.21:1-3

3000

30,564,169
For complaining about the lack of food and water, God sent fiery serpents to bite the people, and many of them died.

Num.21:6

100

30,564,269
God delivers the Bashanites into Moses’ hands and Moses kills everyone “until there was none left alive.”

Num.21:34-35

1000

30,565,269
For “committing whoredom with the daughters of Moab”

Num.25:9

24,000

30,589,269
Midianite massacre (32,000 virgins were kept alive)

Num.31:1-35

90,000+

30,679,269
The slaughter of the Anakim, the children of Esau, and the Horim

Deuteronomy 2:21-22

5000

30,684,269
God hardened the king of Heshbon’s heart so that the Israelites could massacre his people. (included several cities)

Dt.2:33-34

3000

30,687,269
God delievered the king of Bashan so that the Israelites could massacre his people.

Dt.3:3-6

60,000

30,747,269
Massacre of Jericho

Joshua 6:21

1000

30,748,269
God tells Joshua to stone to death Achan (and his family) for taking the accursed thing.

Joshua 7:10-12, 24-26

5+

30,748,274
God tells Joshua to attack Ai and do what he did to Jericho (kill everyone).

Joshua 8:1-25

12,000

30,760,274
God slaughters the Amorites and even chases them “along the way” as they try to escape.

Joshua 10:10-11

1000

30,761,274
Joshua kills 5 kings and hangs their dead bodies on trees

Joshua 10:24-26

5

30,761,279
Massacre of 7 cities

Joshua 10:28-42

7000

30,768,279
God delivers the Hazorites.

Joshua 11:8-12

1000

30,769,279
Massacre of the Anakim

Joshua 11:20-21

1000

30,770,279
God delivered Canaanites and Perizzites

Judges 1:4

10,000

30,780,279
Ehud delivers a message from God: a knife into the king’s belly

Jg.3:15-22

1

30,780,280
God delivered Moabites

Jg.3:28-29

10,000

30,790,280
Massacre of the Canaanites

Jg.4:15

1000

30,791,280
God forces Midianite soldiers to kill each other.

Jg.7:2-22, 8:10

120,000

30,911,280
God delivered the Ammonites to Jephthah to slaughter.

Jg.11:32-33

1000

30,912,280
The Spirit of the Lord comes on Samson

Jg.14:19

30

30,912,310
The Spirit of the Lord comes mightily on Samson

Jg.15:14-15

1000

30,913,310
Samson’s God-assisted act of terrorism

Jg.16:27-30

3000

30,916,310
“The Lord smote Benjamin”

Jg.20:35-37

25,100

30,941,410
More Benjamites

Jg.20:44-46

25,000

30,966,410

For looking into the ark of the Lord

1 Sam.6:19

50,070

31,016,480
God delivered Philistines

1 Sam.14:12

20

God forces the Philistine soldiers to kill each other.

1 Sam.14:20

1000

31,017,500
God orders Saul to kill every Amalekite man, women, and child.

1 Sam.15:2-3

1000

31,018,500
Samuel (at God’s command) hacks Agag to death

1 Sam.15:32-33

1

31,018,501
God delivers the Philistines.

1 Sam.23:2-5

1000

31,019,501
“The Lord smote Nabal.”

1 Sam.25:38

1

31,019,502
God delivers the Philistines to David (again).

2 Sam.5:19, 25

1000

31,020,502
Uzzah for trying to keep the ark from falling

2 Sam.6:6-7, 1 Chr.13:9-10

1

31,020,503
David and Bathsheba’s baby boy

2 Samuel 12:14-18

1

31,020,504
God sent a three-year famine because of something Saul did.

2 Sam.21:1

5000

31,025,504
Seven sons of Saul hung up before the Lord

2 Sam.21:6-9

7

31,025,511
From plague as punishment for David’s census (men only; probably 200,000 if including women and children)

2 Sam.24:13, 1 Chr.21:7

70,000+

31,095,511
A prophet for believing another prophet’s lie

1 Kg.13:1-24

1

31,095,512
Baasha killed everyone in the house of Jeroboam “according to the saying of the Lord.”

1 Kings 15:29

1000

31,096,512
Zimri killed everyone in the house of Baasha “according to the word of the Lord.”

1 Kg.16:11-12

1000

31,097,512
Religious leaders killed in a prayer contest

1 Kg.18:22-40

450

31,097,962
God delivers the Syrians into the Israelites’ hands

1 Kg.20:28-29

100,000

31,197,962
God makes a wall fall on Syrian soldiers

1 Kg.20:30

27,000

31,224,962
God sent a lion to eat a man for not killing a prophet

1 Kg.20:35-36

1

31,224,963
Ahaziah is killed for talking to the wrong god.

2 Kings 1:2-4, 17, 2 Chr.22:7-9

1

31,224,964
Burned to death by God

2 Kg.1:9-12

102

31,225,066
God sends two bears to kill children for making fun of Elisha’s bald head

2 Kg.2:23-24

42

31,225,108
Trampled to death for disbelieving Elijah

2 Kg.7:17-20

1

31,225,109
God calls for a seven year famine.

2 Kg.8:1

10,000

31,235,109
Jezebel

2 Kg.9:33-37

1

31,235,110
Jehu killed “all that remained unto Ahab in Samaria … according to the saying of the Lord”

2 Kg.10:16-17

100

31,235,210
God sent lions to kill “some” foreigners

2 Kg.17:25-26

3+

31,235,213
Sleeping Assyrian soldiers

2 Kg.19:35, 2 Chr.32:21, Is.37:36

185,000

31,420,213
Saul

1 Chronicles 10:14

1

31,420,214
God delivers Israel into the hands of Judah

2 Chronicles 13:15-17

500,000

31,920,214
Jeroboam

2 Chr.13:20

1

31,920,215
“The Lord smote the Ethiopians.”

2 Chr.14:9-14

1,000,000

32,920,215
God kills Jehoram by making his bowels fall out

2 Chr.21:14-19

1

32,920,216
Judean soldiers because they had forsaken the Lord

2 Chr.28:6

120,000

33,040,216
God delivered the Israelites into the hand of the Chaldeans.

2 Chr.36:16-17

1000

33,041,216
Ezekiel’s wife

Ezekiel 24:15-18

1

33,041,217
Ananias and Sapphira

Acts 5:1-10

2

33,041,219
Herod

Acts 12:23

1

33,041,220


ButterCookie: “Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, please note that I only included those killings for which specific numbers are given. There are many events in the Bible where no number of fatalities is given. Noah’s flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the many plagues, famines, etc. all are unknown variables, likely to push this number well over 30 million

The entire courtroom is STUNNED…..

Lord God holds his face in his hands as his attorney begins to sweat.

ButterCookie: “Wow…..that’s a psychotic murder spree if I ever saw one.”

Satan: “Indeed. This is why I rebelled against him. This is why I lead the revolt with some of the other crew members to aid the humans in rising against him. I urged the human slaves to not be afraid of him and to know the truth.

He had been spreading lies and propaganda, even to this day, saying that I am the enemy. I was humanity’s HERO…..”

ButterCookie: “Thank you, Lucifer. Your witness, prosecutor.”

Prosecutor: (Wipes sweat) “Uh….Thank you. Mr. Satan, isn’t it true that you did indeed have your hand in a lil’ murder? Remember the story of Job?

Satan: “Indeed I do. Job 1: 1-19? Oh yes. I was trying to explain to the Lord God that the slaves did not love him; they feared him. And that they would curse him if he did not provide for them. He decided to place a wager on 10 people’s lives in order to see who won the bet. If I am guilty, then it is for those 10 murders only, murders that the Lord God placed a BET on.”

Not to mention his allowance for the killing of Jesus Christ.”

Prosecution: “No further questions.”

ButterCookie: “You may be seated, Lucifer”

Closing remarks

ButterCookie: “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
I implore you today to look beyond the prejudices and negative stigma placed on my client for all of these years, mainly done in propaganda by the Church. When examining the facts of the case, you will surely note that not only is my client

of these crimes, but the very ‘Lord and Savior’ as the Church proclaims is the true guilty party here….
The REAL enemy.

The facts show that the Lord God treated humanity cruelly having committed kidnapping, rape, and torture, and who could refute the countless mass murders?

He even ordered the killing of innocent babies.

Eve was not tempted to do evil in the Garden of Eden, ladies and gentlemen. She was tempted into self-awareness, enlightenment, and mutiny against the evil Lord God.

By the way, why was the Lord God so upset at this exchange of wisdom by Satan and the humans?

Because you cannot have an ‘intelligent slave’.

Let me remind you of the murder tally of the bible, again.


Satan/ Lucifer: 10
The Lord God: 2,038,344 (not including victims from the nuclear attack on Sodom and Gomorrah or the Deluge, and the may plagues and famines)

I ask you, by all definitions of the word EVIL, who really is the evil in this trial?

I rest my case.”

The defense rests.

Comments???

Chirp chirp crickets . . . .

I know reading hurts the brain, but it doesn't hurt THAT much.

Try reading it please.

Then comment.

I did read it. . . . and didn't think it earned more than that.

reply to post by ButterCookie


Psalms 9

15 The nations have fallen into the pit they have dug;
their feet are caught in the net they have hidden.
16 The LORD is known by his acts of justice;
the wicked are ensnared by the work of their hands.[c]
17 The wicked go down to the realm of the dead,
all the nations that forget God.
18 But God will never forget the needy;
the hope of the afflicted will never perish.

Jeremiah 9

23 This is what the LORD says:

“Let not the wise boast of their wisdom
or the strong boast of their strength
or the rich boast of their riches,
24 but let the one who boasts boast about this:
that they have the understanding to know me,
that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight,”
declares the LORD.

Originally posted by MasterGemini
Chirp chirp crickets . . . .

I know reading hurts the brain, but it doesn't hurt THAT much.

Try reading it please.

Then comment.

Read it...garbage. Still a waste of bandwidth. Still should be in Rant section. Foolishness.

reply to post by micmerci


also second time hes posted it............

people learn the rules ........seriously

Its much worse than your Abrahamic (Judeaism, Islam Christianity) faiths say it is....much much worse.


Why do you think your illuminati do the things they do (magic, blood sacrafice etc)??? Keep the gates closed and rearrange the gates. This is no joke and they take it deadly serious


be grateful for 911, 77 and many many other times they have rushed to save you and themselves.

How could there be 6 atheists on the jury in the very room where Lord God and Satan are in? Do the atheists not see or hear anything when they are speaking? lol

Originally posted by micmerci
How could there be 6 atheists on the jury in the very room where Lord God and Satan are in? Do the atheists not see or hear anything when they are speaking? lol

What if I was to tell you Atheism is a religion of sorts?

I know....

Its gonna be ok....Promis

reply to post by superluminal11


Tell that to a modern atheist and see what kind of response you get.

I know...probably won't be alright... I promise

reply to post by ButterCookie


Nice job on this. This was not only fun to read, but contains a lot of information that one could come back to to reference. I think you should turn into into a play and it should be performed every easter or something.

NOT GUILTY!

Loved it. Very well thought out scenerio. Very damning evidence.

If God and Satan are both seated in the same courtroom, Would that make an atheist head explode? No, because they are there and that could be proven.

EDIT: Why doI have a strange craving for shortbread?????

I'll herald the creativity and time that you put into this thread. It is an interesting take on the scriptures. I especially found the correlation between slavery and toiling the earth interesting.

Didn't the toiling start AFTER the eating of the forbidden fruit(never stated as an apple BTW)?