Rapture is not occuring as scheduled!

reply to post by Wildeagle


Haha

that made my face hurt so thank you

Originally posted by FuGGer
did anyone check if Jesus RSVPd?

hahaha
he called last night for help on figuring out what to wear

the sad part: everybody who gave money to that crazy old fart can't sue to get it back because it was a legal donation to an organization.

It would be like going to Burger King, ordering a BK Western, eating it, and then saying it was bad and half-rotten and trying to get a refund. That's BS of a high order. No mortal being knows nor can know of when the world's gonna end. It's simply outside of our human intelligence to conceive a complete and total end to our existence as a species! We just reject it; "I am human, I am the top of the food chain, hear me roar!" and all that nonsense.

Macho Man saved us from the Rapture!!!

Damn, so my End of the World party was thrown for nothing? and I actually have to clean up the mess?

I think i'll sue the management of Heaven...

I wonder what will happen to all those fundementalists.

reply to post by FailedProphet



Oh so 5months from now we're all going to be obliterated? so is this the end of times? Can I run out in the streets naked??

reply to post by Nobama


BLASPHAMY!!! how dare you do such a thing at such a time?!



/end sarcasm

reply to post by DazedDave


Best thing i've seen all week

This is exactly what I and my sister and brother was talking about last night. And whats the truth.

You cannot try to put a date on anything that God does. Its out of our control and impossible to understand.

None of the signs of the end of times has happened yet.

But then again nobody knows the time and the hour in which he will come.

As a thief in the night. To retrive whats rightfully God's and to put away sin.


And this is the exact reaction that evil forces want (which is completely real). But then again Gods in control of it all.

The Son will return with great glory, I know he will, and like it says he sits at the right hand of the father.


And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.

He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son.

But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

reply to post by karen61057


...No, it was actually predicted that the rapture would happen at 6pm LOCAL time, so whenever reached 6pm in your respective time zone, thats when you were supposed to have the giant earthquakes. He said it would happen first in places like Australia and Oceania, followed by the Asian countries, then rolling through Europe and finally North America.

reply to post by EnigmaticDill


Reading that makes God seem like a sneaky boss, trying to catch his employees hands in the cookie jar. I wonder if he's a peeking tom aswell?

Sorry for doublepost , but I'm going by this countdown for the exact time of the "EOTW" and according to it we still have 6 hours

reply to post by Nobama



For the Son of man is as a man taking a far journey, who left his house, and gave authority to his servants, and to every man his work, and commanded the porter to watch.

Watch ye therefore: for ye know not when the master of the house cometh, at even, or at midnight, or at the cockcrowing, or in the morning:

Lest coming suddenly he find you sleeping.


But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison

Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.

Originally posted by FailedProphet
It's already happened but no human beings on this evil earth were found sinless enough to be raptured.
So the prophecy did, in fact, technically come true, although nothing has actually changed.

Win-win.

Jesus is the lamb that was slain to wash away the sins of the world.

Those who believe in Jesus have their sins washed away.

reply to post by freedish


Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,

To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you,

Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.

Wherein ye greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations:

That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:

My friend and I were discussing what a fitting punishment would be for the false prophet in the (very) likely event that the day God the Father chose to be the Day of the Lord did not coincide with that chosen by the random nutter.

Stoning seems too Old Testament.

We came up with a handful of possibilities:

1) IRS audit
2) Guantanamo Bay
3) Extraordinary rendition
4) Waterboarding
5) Quantico marine brig under prevention of injury watch

Our favourite, however, was scorn and ridicule for the remaining days of his (short, sorry) life, in the hope that he might realise the error of his ways and repent.

reply to post by EnigmaticDill


Thank you, very encouraging

Originally posted by freedish
reply to post by EnigmaticDill

 

Thank you, very encouraging

That one was a quote directly from the Bible.

reply to post by XtraTL


Yea he" knows that.