I have lost my smile, any advice?

So hello ATS, im a new guy in here. Im from Finland so my english writing may be full of typos .
Sorry about that.

So anyways, when i was young i was allways happy, smiling and full of life.
Not anymore, i have totally lost my smile and i still have everyting that should make me happy, beutifull wife two kids, house, cat and car and i love them (exept my car)
Im constantly in bad mood, hate my job and everyting is just grey. Not happy not sad not depressed. Same thing every day, not feeling good or bad no highs and lows just grey!!
Is it my job? All my life done the same job, but at the time there is hardly any other jobs available anymore.
And i doubt my job is the reason for this.

Might just be that mid life crises has hit me , dont know?
Im sure someone can help me here?

PS. allready tried the Bible.

Try the Quran.

Originally posted by Kelmi
So hello ATS, im a new guy in here. Im from Finland so my english writing may be full of typos

.
Sorry about that.

So anyways, when i was young i was allways happy, smiling and full of life.
Not anymore, i have totally lost my smile and i still have everyting that should make me happy, beutifull wife two kids, house, cat and car and i love them (exept my car)

Im constantly in bad mood, hate my job and everyting is just grey. Not happy not sad not depressed. Same thing every day, not feeling good or bad no highs and lows just grey!!
Is it my job? All my life done the same job, but at the time there is hardly any other jobs available anymore.
And i doubt my job is the reason for this.

Might just be that mid life crises has hit me , dont know?
Im sure someone can help me here?

PS. allready tried the Bible.

Been there myself pal, my advice is to plan something new and stick to it. Try give yourself rewards to look forward too, maybe little things like a night out with just your wife once a month. If you use excuses not to then you need to give yourself a slap and make it happen. Try and focus on the things you enjoy and are good at like being a dad and work on things that need improvement. Pay more attention to the good things in your life and they will return the favor.

All the best
Helgas

reply to post by Kelmi



Actually, you do sound like you have some of the classic symptoms of depression. Maybe it would help you to see a psychologist or psychiatrist, or even take an online depression test.
( Maybe this one : www.depressedtest.com... )
I have a history of clinical depression and I can tell you its not necessarily being sad all the time, it can also make you feel very cut off from emotion and make it so you get no enjoyment out of things that should by all means be making you happy. Whether it is or isn't depression though,I hope you feel better soon.

It's strange how be a grown-up usually brings on huge amounts of nothingness. This nothingness wipes away our smiles in a couple of rounds. I've felt and have been feeling more or less like you describe.

I really dont know. What's been working pretty fine for me is taking back good old habits: less sleep, more nightover TV, more Red Bulls, more PC games, more reading, more interest in all those "useless" things like Space, Stars, turning my adult life into a teen-age scenario again. Is working pretty ok.

reply to post by Kelmi


Get dressed up fairly nice and go window shopping at the mall.
Folks who frequent the mall are generally sheeple and are therefore in a state of bliss, this may vibrate onto you, who knows.
Being nicely attired will add to the "better you look the better you feel" thing.
Just a start, but get out for some free time anyway.

Hmm.

Mama bear and baby bear, was walking, in a very cold blizard.

Baby bear: Mom! Am i really an icebear?
Mama bear: Of cause you are, you silly..
5 Min later...
Baby bear: MOM! Are you really sure i am an icebear..
Mama bear: Yes i am absolutly sure you are an icebear..Why do you keep asking?

Baby bear: I AM FREEEEEEZING!

Thats the best i can do

You could try what they suggest to war vets coming back from pts syndrome.
Go spend some time in nature to get some perspective.

It's possible you are suffering from S.A.D. (Seasonal affective disorder).

I don't know exactly what the sun and daylight hours are doing at the moment up there in Finland, but I know from personal experience that I suffer down here in France.

Depression, doom and gloom used to get to me each year and I never understood why.

Now, I recognise the symptoms when they begin arriving and just to know that is enough to stop most of the worrying and help me feel better about life when the dark evenings and long nights begin.

Seasonal affective disorder (SAD), also known as winter depression, winter blues, summer depression or summer blues, is a mood disorder in which people who have normal mental health throughout most of the year experience depressive symptoms in the winter or summer,[1] spring or autumn, repeatedly, year after year. In the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV), SAD is not a unique mood disorder, but is "a specifier of major depression".[2]
Once regarded skeptically by the experts, seasonal affective disorder is now well established. Epidemiological studies estimate that its prevalence in the adult population of the US ranges from 1.4 percent (Florida) to 9.7 percent (New Hampshire).[3]
The US National Library of Medicine notes that "some people experience a serious mood change when the seasons change. They may sleep too much, have little energy, and may also feel depressed. Though symptoms can be severe, they usually clear up."[4] The condition in the summer is often referred to as reverse seasonal affective disorder, and can also include heightened anxiety.[5]
SAD was first formally described and named in 1984 by Norman E. Rosenthal and colleagues at the National Institute of Mental Health.[6][7] There are many different treatments for classic (winter-based) seasonal affective disorder, including light therapy with sunlight or bright lights, antidepressant medication, cognitive-behavioral therapy, ionized-air administration,[8] and carefully timed supplementation of the hormone melatonin.[9]

Wikileaks- Seasonal affective disorder

It's natural and normal to go through this cycle depending on where one is located on the planet. Understanding and accepting it is the key to suffering the least when entering the symptoms.

Why do you think Spring is such a wonderful time of year? Our eyes see beauty and our minds find relief.

Could apply to you and I thought I'd mention it. Maybe your doctor can help more with a proper diagnosis.

Good luck, be happy and well, and tell us how you get on up there my friend.

Autobiography of a Yogi,by Paramhansa Yogananda

reply to post by DrumsRfun


Yeah i love fishing, but this winter here in Finland have been soooo long its still snowing and last night -10.
The weather this winter has been so odd.

Thanks everyone for your advises, ill try anything and everything

reply to post by Kelmi


Ice fishing,ice skating,winter camping,hot chocolate.
Don't let it get ya down.....theres a silver lining in every cloud.
The world is yer oyster my friend.

I wouldn't recommend taking anti-depressants.
I heard and have seen that those will make you crazy.

reply to post by Pinkgomo653


Some antidepressants can mess with you a bit, but not all of them. For some people I do believe it's worth it. My antidepressants are the only reason I can still function at all. Obviously if you're functioning well then they may not be necessary, but that's no reason to discourage taking them in general.
Exercise can be a really good alternative to antidepressants, though.

Two recomendations if you've lost your smile

Meditation for one...get in touch with your self...

And...

Do you get out and enjoy nature once in a while? Try a walk in the forest, go camping for a few days. Many people are unhappy because they've lost touch with nature which is not Our Nature. We sit in our houses and disconnect ourselves from nature...

Once upon a time humans socialized by sitting around a fire and telling stories, shareing a few laughs and probably a few drinks. Fresh air and good friends to enjoy it with. Now we have TV to tell us stories...

No wonder we're disconnected from the world

Good luck my friend

Easy peasy...
Make yourself smile at someone.. randomly. They may or may not smile back.. but keep it up. Youll make it a habit and folks will smile back at you and sense your approachability. Worked for Ted Bundy anyway.

There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day. The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem? Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing. Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?! Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup.

OP, got it!

Just Click Here

If your smile has gone and replaced with a frown;
just stand on your head and the smile will return?