New and Improved Master Rant on the Nation of SUCKATION!!!

-People that don't know obvious things, not that all of us don't know something obvious (and in the end feel like the jackass we should feel like), but these numb nuts have no desire to learn. Well screw you then.

-Bobble heads. You nodding little bastards, with your condecending smiles. I bet you think your little plastic #s don't stink. At least I don't have Mattel stamped on my ass.

-Mya Angelo. I hate to say it honey, but your poetry SUCKS.

-Black people (some not all). Good god man, you even get mad when a fellow black man like Bill Cosby tells you to stop being Bling-freaks. Take a hint.

-Aging hipsters (namely of the white persuasion). YOU'RE 40 YEARS OLD. Take the ear ring out of your ear and stop listening to DMX. You're LAME and wouldn't know cool if it kicked your lilly white ass for cutting them off in traffic for talking on your cell phone.

-Snotty bitches. Why do you knowingly let your boobs show then act pissed when people a) look at them, b) ask you to dance or go out, and c) LOOK AT THEM. I'm sure after a couple thousand years of men wanting sex from women, they might understand that we like to check out the goods. You love it, and you are afraid that once it goes away you will be nothing but a hollow shell who is bitter and old. Get off it and stop acting better than you are.

-Reality TV. IT'S NOT REAL YOU MORONS. These are carefully crafted and edited situations that force people to fill specific charcters much like anything else. You don't know them, or even like them. No one cares what you think of them, so SHUT UP. Do you really think you will find a quality woman by "testing the goods" of thirty women? I'm sure the last one left won't try to one up you like you did to the other 29 women.

-Football. In real life, it is nothing but entertainment for the mentally challanged. Fighting over the accomplishment of others is truely pathetic you lame brained neanderthals. What's worse, is that my airwaves are covered with people paid to pander to your dumb ass by providing hours of commentary about something that means nothing. Let's spin our wheels some more, bury our heads in the sand, and let this world go to crap because you are filled with who scratched their ass 57 times in the pre-season.

Adult happy meals. I equate these to the begining of adult diapers. A salad and a water makes you happy? An adult happy meal sounds more like an all you can eat at the strip club, but that's just me. I guess we have to cater to the morbidly obies. But the funny thing is, is THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO LOOSE WEIGHT. If you did, you'd stop buying their stepmasters, their sickass shakes, the pills, the protein bars, the carb counting books, the diet cokes, the special dinners. Better idea, get an enema and a head of lettice.

Planned communities. Why don't they just say it like it is. Welcome to your New hometown. We don't like minorities (except to mulch our flower beds or mow our lawns), poor people, or reality.

UFOs, Telepathy, Tarot cards. Is there some guildbook and clothing line for people who believe is stupid crap? They are either extreme rednecks (like the hillbilly type who wear those lame camoflag jacket and hat combos, which is interchanable with the John Deer hats) or earthy types who think Darma's mom and dad from Darma and Greg are snappy dressers. Nice purple vest.

Kid's shows. DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE. 'Nuff said.

African clothes.

Real African people


More Real African people



So after seeing that, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!



Please, but Germans don't dress like this.





I wish fat people could see their feet. As a matter of fact, I saw a fat woman firefighter the other day. I don't just mean the stocky lesbian type, I mean that she literally had a SHELF of fat sticking out over her belt like one of those Africans with the plate in their lips lying over their chin. Looked to me that she had to be careful not to wear any flannel because the heat of friction between the shelf and the pelvic area would be too much and she could burst into flames. She was so big that her boobs got lost in the straight slope between her neck and the tip of the stomach shelf and their is no hope of rescue. It's formed a big triangle of nasty, displayed for the world to see. But let's not forget who we hope for in case of a fire. I'm sure she's pull me out of a flaming building.


Sexual Addiction. This is something I can't understand the need to label. If any other addiction plagued 49% of the population then it should be called an epidemic. Most boys start the addiction but experimenting with odd textures that feel wierdly pleasing (like that rabbit fur you got from summer camp) until you pee something that isn't pee. Fast forward to the myriad men posing their "I'm a bad ass" pose in every bar across the country completely oblivious to the fact that chicks KNOW what they are after and can avoid them (unless they are sluts). How can men be sexual addicts. Most men (if not all) would give it the old college try on their death bed, with 104 degree fever, with a broken leg, in the sonogram room while your wife is pregnant, in a fast food restroom, in the car, while driving, in the office, on the copier (with a nice sovenier for your collection), and isn't it always the man who brings up "breaking in the new house"? After all that, we still have "personal time" that would make the nastiest woman blush. You can see what happens when we don't have women to keep us under control. Gay men go NUTS. They dress as women and have small leather shorts.


So ends Part One...

Stay tuned for more on this channel.

The mighty KJ. Sex symbol and calander model for ADD Monthly.

christ, feel batter after this KJ?

Comic Book Guy: Worst rant ever.
Go outside.

Geez beagle. It's just for fun. This is not a real rant. I'm surprised you revived this thread.

Originally posted by KrazyJethro

UFOs, Telepathy, Tarot cards. Is there some guildbook and clothing line for people who believe is stupid crap? They are either extreme rednecks (like the hillbilly type who wear those lame camoflag jacket and hat combos, which is interchanable with the John Deer hats) or earthy types who think Darma's mom and dad from Darma and Greg are snappy dressers. Nice purple vest.

.

Ouch thats harsh- not funny- and its really insulting!!The majority of my family MUST be extreme rednecks then.

I wonder how old are you when your are so mad at life.

Hey, there's no age to be mad at life. I was mad at 18 and I'm still mad at 22.

KJ - What's wrong with John Deer hat/cap ? They're cool.