50 Symptoms of ATS Syndrome! Are YOU Infected?

reply to post by woodwardjnr

Originally posted by woodwardjnr

If there was a vaccine, ATS Syndrome would instantly make you suspicious about any such vaccination and you would be forced to create a thread about how dangerous the vacine is, warning your fellow ATSers not to take the vacine

edit on 5-1-2011 by woodwardjnr because: (no reason given)

Wood... sssssshhhhhh, Don't give away my next thread!

Actually vaccines are dangerous and ATS Syndrome, thankfully, can be cured by a stringent 12 step program. But there is a catch that we have yet to overcome...

In order for the 12 step program to work, you have to appeal to your higher power. Appealing to your higher power can break you free of your addiction. The problem seems to be that once you've done that, it is common to find oneself back on ATS writing endless, rambling threads about that higher power and your appreciation towards it.

~Heff

Originally posted by HefficideThe problem seems to be that once you've done that, it is common to find oneself back on ATS writing endless, rambling threads about that higher power and your appreciation towards it.

~Heff

Is that so wrong.

hahahahhahaa..nice thread mate, tnx

A sure sign that you are infected... when you are assigned your own MOD!!!!

~Heff

reply to post by Hefficide


Excellent OP

Thanking you kindly for 'administrating' a sense of 'vaccine'

Our choice of 'medicine' enabling our protection from those who are seriously infected.

This type of mutation can be rather concerning but Im glad many of us have been vaccinated from such an infestation

Bumping because shameless self promotion can also be an act of community service.

reply to post by Hefficide


Bump acknowledged.
Dang that ATS infection just won't go away.....

reply to post by Misoir


You may not have ATS syndrome but you're surly obsessed with the word "NO", I have never heard anyone over the age of three say that 49 times.

I think there may be a 12 step program out there for that.

actually never even thought about Colleen as a female. Guess i'm infected.

Originally posted by Hefficide
Bumping because shameless self promotion can also be an act of community service.

so me pimping my self is a good thing . cool just what i always wanted to be a ats flag and star ho .....

ahh my dreams have come true ....

so peeps get to flaging and staring all of my threads and post right now , heff said its cool. and the thing to do.

That was bloody hilarious Heffi

Can I add one?

You know you're infected when you start to stalk members...

37) You use 128 key encryption to email your Mom.


Thats NOT a symptom of any ATS infection.. thats just good security sense...

Originally posted by Advantage
37) You use 128 key encryption to email your Mom.


Thats NOT a symptom of any ATS infection.. thats just good security sense...

F that...512 encrypt gives me enough time to get up to my hidden underground bunker on BLM land, if my "MIB seeker" app alarm goes off.

Originally posted by jimmyx

Originally posted by Advantage
37) You use 128 key encryption to email your Mom.


Thats NOT a symptom of any ATS infection.. thats just good security sense...

F that...512 encrypt gives me enough time to get up to my hidden underground bunker on BLM land, if my "MIB seeker" app alarm goes off.

Thats just crazy talk.. WHat are you doing OUT of your bunker emailing people?? Silly sheeple....

reply to post by Hefficide


Number 40 use to get me all the time, but after I left my old job I just quit worrying about it. Some other ones here too but not gonna say which else affect me.

I don't sleep at night, just in case " They " come for me, so I stay on ATS from 1am to 7am, then I am tired all day and blame it on " Them " beaming top secret waves at me. I have the telephone on answerphone 24/7 and almost never return calls because a little man lives inside my machine and he listens to my calls. I wait for the postman to arrive, but refuse to collect the mail, in case someone tampered with it. It's a good job I am normal, otherwise I would never leave the house, Ah just a minuite, when WAS the last time I left the house, I can't remember, I will have to look out of the window to check if they are still out there, they have been there since Christmas !

Bumping this because I forgot it existed... new folks might wanna laugh too.

Originally posted by Hefficide
Bumping this because I forgot it existed... new folks might wanna laugh too.

OMG heffs suffering from premature memory loss.. everybody call the guys with the white jackets .. white jackets , white jackets ...

heff, me dear, you know i do care for ya .. tis for the best and your mental health ...

reply to post by Hefficide


HA LARRY US!! THANK YOU I needed a laugh

01) You've spontaneously cut a great first date short because the other party said the words "Who's David Icke?"

Dang it. You got me at number one.

Well, actually it was Ron Paul not David Icke, but...

Thanks for bumping this, it made my night.