ATS Need some help thinking things through (Long Thread) time sensitive

Before i start i just wanted to apologize if this thread is all over the place. Whether it is read as religious, political, spiritual or economic melt down i have a lot to say. While i may have a lot to say, i would appreciate any feedback, questions, opposing points of view or disagreements you might have with my post.

Let me start with my story.

A little over 3 years ago my son was born. While his mother and i never married i took the idea of family more importantly than most i know. My new born son, his mother and her daughter from another relationship lived in an upscale apartment building. Both the mother and i worked retail with long hours and odd shifts. Approximately 6 months after my son was born i required surgery for a chronic condition which i have delt with my entire life. The down time was to be 6 months. My insurance through work paid me 80% of my salary through this time period and i stayed home to take care of my son and his mothers daughter. My sons mother continued to work. My days were filled with pain due to my medical issue but i somehow found it in me to overcome and ensure my son was well taken care of along with his sister. The children became my life. Taking care of them was my job. A job i was happier doing than any other job i've had before. Sure it was hard work, but extremely rewarding. This went on for six months, thorough the surgery, the recovery and eventually i went back to work. Upon going back to work and getting back in touch i realized while i was in recovery things had fallen apart. While out from work my sons mother would tell me she was working extra hours, had a meeting or was to tired to drive so she was not coming home. Being a supportive partner i always bought this excuses and blindly trusted her in good faith. Eventually she left retail and landed a government job with the help of some of her friends. From here on out, i no longer got phone calls when she was not coming home. There were many nights where her daughter would ask me when i mommy going to be home and i would have to make something up about mommy being late due to traffic. It was a sad situation and looking at it now i realize what was happening but then didn't and just continued trying to be the best father/boyfriend i could be. I tried to speak with my sons mother, offered to go to counseling and tried everything in the book to put things back together only to fail. My eyes were not opened as to what was going on until i came home to a eviction notice on the apartments front door. In a panic i called my best friend and asked for his help to get all of our belongings into a storage shed. Once we did the next day i went to my bank to check my account. What i found was shocking. In the 6 months i was out of work. My sons mother was in control of finances. In that time i do not know what she was doing with my income but i wrongly assumed it was paying bills. To my surprise i found i was:

~ 3 months late on rent
~ 4 months late on car insurance (i was dropped at this point)
~ 3 months behind on Car payment
~ 2 months behind on cable and internet
~ 3 months behind on electric
~ 5 months behind on water and sewer
~ one of my credit cards maxed out
~ 3 months late on both cell phone payments

Adding up all my deposits from medical leave i discovered i had made close to 8k in those 6 months. Now all my money was gone and no bills were paid. What made this worst was my incime tax refund of 8k also had been spent. My first thought was how could she do this to me? My 2nd thought was what the hell is she doing with all this money? My sons mother at the time made close to 90k a year my salary was 70k. It's not like she was hurting.

Needless to say i started talking to a lawyer because i could see what was happening. For about 2 more months i put up with my sons mother coming and going as she pleased. Fought tooth and nail to pay rent and support her daughter and my son until enough was enough. The straw that broke the camels back came when i cut off her access to my bank card. Immediately she attempted to withdraw all money i had from my bank account but failed. Next thing i knew she stopped calling, completely stopped coming home. A few times i was forced to call out of work on days she was suppose to be off work because i needed to be with the children who were 9 years old and 9 months old at the time since she was not there. Soon there after she started taking her daughter with her to a friend's house during weekends. Finally enough was enough. I was starting to get into some trouble at work due to my constant need to call out from having no one to watch my son. His mother was unreliable and to my knowledge had a alcohol addiction and perhaps (just guessing) drug addiction. Once i realized she was not going to accept help, i took my son and stooped at a friend's house. Once his mother realized i was no longer living at the apartment (approximately a week), she started freaking out. Telling me she wanted to see our son, but at this point i didn't feel safe with that. She then started showing up at family and friends houses telling them i kidnapped our son and would not let her see him. Every time i spoke with her she sounded drunk. One night it came to a head and she had her lawyer step in, like wise did mine. I was told at this point she had moved in with one of her friends and that i needed to allow her to have my son by my lawyer or a judge would not look at me favorably in court. I agreed and both lawyers came to a agreement that my son would be able to go with his mother and stay with her 3-4 days a week. Basically a joint good faith agreement. Not happy with this but afraid i would get in trouble and not be able to see my son due to court i agreed. Little did i know it would be over a month before i saw my son again. After a stressful month and a half, my life fell apart. I stepped down from my management position at work due to stress and moved into a lower paying less demanding supervisor position. I got myself a little apartment and lived off ends meet. I had anxiety attacks on a nightly basis and stayed up for hours upon end on the internet researching legal rights. Eventually my lawyer reached a good faith agreement and for a year straight my sons mother and i split visitation 50/50. 2 days prior to our court date for custody (10,000 in legal bills later) my lawyer told me she reached a settlement with the opposing lawyer. She ten tried to talk me into seeing my son twice a week, paying no child support and giving up legal and sole physical custody. I declined. My lawyer did not agree with my decision but went back to the drawing board and finally came back and told me the opposing lawyer was drafting an agreement with 99% of what i wanted in place with was joint/joint rotating 3 days 4 nights a week. I said ok and court was canceled literally on the court house steps. A few days later i was called to my lawyers office to sign the agreement. While going over the agreement i found nothing was changed. The agreement had my sons mother with soul legal and joint physical. I refused to sign it. Unfortunately at this point i was out of money. Lost my apartment, moved in with my grandmother and lost my lawyer due to finances. Luckily i was able to steal 2 more months with my son prior to his mother discovering my lawyer was no longer representing me. At this point she started with holding again. At this point i decided to cash in my 401k to get another lawyer. I figured since the first one was lower priced that i would go with the best of the best to get things done and over with. 20 thousand dollars later on top of the 13 thousand for the first lawyer, i was back to square one. The second lawyer burned through my $20,000 in a little under 2 months. While i admit she did get me back on track with seeing my son, she did more damage than good. Eventually i ran out of money again. This past March my sons mother enrolled my son into a Montessori school with at my permission or knowledge. Our agreement at this time was i had my son Friday through Monday. One day prior to me having my son i received an email from her stating he would be starting school and needed to be returned home Sunday night and that form this point forward i would only have home Saturdays and Sundays. Upset with this is refused to give him back (he was 2 at this point). My lawyer called me and told me i had to or she would stop representing me due to the fact that i had moral high ground that i would lose if i kept my son. I let her bully me gave in and gave my son back. Little did i know i would not see him for 4 months. Once again at this point i was broke. I ended up obtaining a pro se lawyer through my benefit's at work and since march have paid him 15 thousand dollars. We had a court date scheduled in October which was abandoned due to flooding at the court house. My sons mother has moved over an hour away and between now and March the best thing we could work out visitation wise consisted of me driving 2 hours to see my son in a public place for 2 hours then driving two hours home twice a week. After 2 months of that i was able to start keeping my son over night from Saturday at 4pm until 10 a.m. Sunday morning.

My reason in typing this is that my court date is next week. My current lawyer is doing a lot of back pedaling. He has offered me a settlement of seeing my son every other weekend in which i which i declined. Now my sons mother is also coming after me for back child support from his birth. Keep in mind up until this march i pretty much had him 3-4 nights a week. The good news is our latest visitation agreement signed by a judge was violate by her on several occasions and i have filed for contempt of court.

So where does conspiracy fit into all of this?
Why do i need your help?

First off any help or kind words at this point can only do good.
Second my son is my life. My sun in the sky. I will fight to the death for him.
What are your thoughts on this?

Of course i have shortened this story and left a lot our but you get the general idea my sons mom is crazy! Is it fair for her to have my son more just because she is a woman?

Conspiracy and my Beliefs

America......we pride ourselves on the saying words like freedom, liberty and justice yet we as Americans are all but these things. Your typical average Joe American is a sheep in a large heard. Our government likes it that way. Even your average Joe American likes it that way. You see us Americans are slaves. Our government has taught us to over look the responsibilities of freedom. We careless go to the poles and vote in corrupt elected officials into office who wage wars with other countries, prop up a broken legal system and punish those who stand up to them. The rest of the world is mad at us and they should be. Americans as a whole are currently equivalent to a drunk driver. All we are worried about is American Idol, Jersey Shore and reality tv, not the havoc our government is causing at home and around the rest of the world. Sadly enough but warranted we will pay in due time.

Now where does this fit into my story. Well ill explain.

You see as i said before my son is the most important thing in my life. I would die for him and will die fighting for him if i have to. Currently America's court systems are bias and typically give the mother a win in the court room when it comes to separation and divorce unless you can really prove something is wrong and the child is in danger. There is no fairness or justice, only a predetermined outcome Judges use to decide on matters like this. I realize my day in court is coming up. I know in my heart and soul my son deserves equal time with me. As a true American i will not allow a corrupt legal system to take my son from me or make it so i can only see him every other weekend.

With that being said.....what other options do i have?

What do i do if i go into the court room and the judge decided to take the easy way out? As a true American i will stand up and fight for my son's freedom and liberties. I will fight for my legal and GOD GIVEN right to see and be with my son!

According to my lawyer, things are looking pretty bleak. He does not think i will get joint, joint. He believes i will get stuck with back child support. He also believes i will only see my son every other weekend. If this happens i will devote my life to destroying the legal system in America as we know it. I have already started working on a website for fathers rights. I've read numerous books and I'm ready to go but hope it is not necessary.

If i lose my son, i will lose all faith in America and will do whatever i must to destroy this corrupt society in which the rest of the world already see's and my eyes have been recently opened to. A true American fights for freedom and truth. I'm a true American, not just another sheep in the herd.

To everyone outside of America i apologize for what my brother and sisters in this country have allowed to happen to you. To all the active military currently tricked into following orders form a corrupt government i wish you the best and hope your eyes will open to as to who your leaders really are soon.

As everyone can tell i have a lot more to write and discuss........ i just need to get this out there for now and see where it goes......... ill cont. shortly

please give me any suggestions or thoughts or questions. I need your help thinking things through

wait a minute....you got 80% of your salary which you said was 70k but you only made 8k in 6 months? Thats not right...

reply to post by Electric Crown


My beneift's only allowed me to recieve 80% of my salary while out on medical leave . Also my yearly income was also made up of bonus's. I could not cliam bonus's while on medical leave.


My normal bonus was around 7k to 8k quaterly when things were good.

p.s. retail sucks....wish i had gone to college


edited due to being tired

reply to post by TheEndisNearer


uhhhhhh...welcome.


If i lose my son, i will lose all faith in America and will do whatever i must to destroy this corrupt society in which the rest of the world already see's and my eyes have been recently opened to


No...it's TPTB that are corrupt - society is guilty of complacency, but your destruction should be focused on the former.


And anyways - it sounds like you have more issues with the mother of your child than the system, so how 'bout focusing your energy in that direction and leave society alone..? Everyone would be better off...





Enjoy the site...

you may need to lose a few battles in order to win the war
start with your finances as i am sure that is being used against you
now she wants back child support? sounds like a strategy to me

learn how to meditate you need to remain calm and always act from an internal source of strength
on the more practical side instead of "throwing" money at lawyers try a private investigator
proof of drug addiction or alcoholism will do a lot more for your case

and finally fight to win
don't go to court as a supplicant but don't be to pushy or demanding of your rights
or the court will condemn your son to live with an unfit mother just to show you who's boss

reply to post by facelift


Yes i guess im wrong in saying Society. I guess i should take that back and say the legal system. As far as being mad at my sons mother, ive come to terms with things. She is sick. Mentally she is not capable of much more than what i described above. It is really sad. Also while i may have no respect for her and what she's done. She will always be my sons mother.

I guess it would be helpful to add that after being with her for 3 years, i discovered her last name was not even what she told meit was and found a medical file under her bed from when she was in the military. It stated she was in a mental health facility for 3 months. Diagniosed with a borederline personality disorder and narcastic tendencies. Unfortinitly the file is ten years old and can not be used in court. I also believe she stole it from the base she was at because it is the original. My lawyer swears we can not sue it in court though.

reply to post by DerepentLEstranger


Ive got my finances back in line since then. My credit is destroyed though ( Had a plus credit.

Ive spent a lot of time of relaxing and meditiating over the past months, i always fall asleep, it makes me so tired.

I will remain respectfull in the courtroom but when the ruling comes down and if it is bogus ir eally do not know what i will do or how i can react. I can only imagine it's not good.

All in all if things do not turn out right. I blame no one but the goverment. My quote about scociety was merely to make others hopfully realize their lack of responsibilty when it comes to being free. I know many people on these boards are more responsible but 90 percent of the people i interact with on a daily basis are more concerned with TV then what is going on with our country.

Im sorry if I am wrong but this reeks of trolling your intro thread is a rambling account of a very personal matter to a conspiracy forum and your user name is the end is near ?? Sorry if I am wrong, if I am I would auggest you speak to your friends and family about these problems and focus on getting your life back on track rrather than looking at ways to get back at the legal system

Originally posted by On the level
Im sorry if I am wrong but this reeks of trolling your intro thread is a rambling account of a very personal matter to a conspiracy forum and your user name is the end is near ?? Sorry if I am wrong, if I am I would auggest you speak to your friends and family about these problems and focus on getting your life back on track rrather than looking at ways to get back at the legal system

Trolling? I tried to tie in my personal matter with my beliefs on a corrupt American goverment.

My name was meant to be funny i really could not think of anytihng better. You always see those people holding signs saying "the end is near" i thought it would be funny to make my handle "the end is nearer"

My family and friends have been really supportive but the problem im having is they do not understand why i say our legal system is corrupt and that our goverment in the United States is evil. I came here because after lurking for a while, many people share the same beliefs i do. I honestly believe this is the best place for me to speak to others who see thigns the way i do.

and rambling....lol i believe i warned you in the thread my thoughts were goignt o be all over the place )

Except my apology then my friend sounds like karma is long overdue for that bitch I hope they see sense and you get a result in court enjoy ATS

jess that just give me goose bumps, thats prity much exactly what hapend to me my miss's was drunk buy 11 am, every day an then taking off in the car late afternoon with no licence, and i want go on but what i put up with then had anoth .
she took off from court the cops every thing an they said i had to hier a priverite investigator,
7 months later she dumps them on me an takes off !! me an the kids havent seen or herd of her in 10 years lol,
an throu court it help'd me couse her familly were on my side thats how bad she was

Originally posted by On the level
Except my apology then my friend sounds like karma is long overdue for that bitch I hope they see sense and you get a result in court enjoy ATS

Thank You, honestly at this point i do not wish anything bad to happen to her. I just want to have equal time with my son. I want to be able to take him and teach him how to play hockey and other things. Even if this happens, at this point though, i do not know if i can turn my back on our broken legal system and goverment. Regardless of the outcome things need to change in America.

No apology needed, it can be hard to comprehend peoples thoughts and emotions online. I appreciate your thoughts questions and replies. Not to mention my post was not the most organized and easiest to read.

Thank You

Originally posted by scott,aussie
jess that just give me goose bumps, thats prity much exactly what hapend to me my miss's was drunk buy 11 am, every day an then taking off in the car late afternoon with no licence, and i want go on but what i put up with then had anoth .
she took off from court the cops every thing an they said i had to hier a priverite investigator,
7 months later she dumps them on me an takes off !! me an the kids havent seen or herd of her in 10 years lol,
an throu court it help'd me couse her familly were on my side thats how bad she was

On the upside you have your kids, id rather be in your shoes my friend trust me. Be Thankfull for what happened. I could only wish she did that to me. Although the sad part is in your scenereo your children have to go with out seeing their mother.

Atleast they ar ein good hands though

yes im very lucky to have the kids, i just hope were you are the courts are more fair on fathers ?
over here the father has buger all rites that was 10 years ago but,

good luck i hope you get what you want,,

its seems sortof degraiding for a father to stand in court an practicly beg for weekends with there kids it just dont seem rite to me

reply to post by scott,aussie


The state i'm in is extremly bias pro mother. That is my delema. If a unfair ruling is made, and i feel as if the judge is just going through the motions of a broken legal system, by me allowing it to happen, i would be buying into a broken legal system supported by a corrupt goverment. At that point i will be forced to defend and take action not only on my sons behalf but for the ture meaning of being an American as well. I feel it would be wrong and unfair to my son to just say ok this is what the judge said, and a slap in the face to Americans who have fought and died for my freedoms and beliefs.

Welcome!

Sounds like a little rough ride there.

I will try to explain things from a very different perspective. Imagine you lived many past lives and you did some bad stuff in those lives. Imagine your ex girlfriend was harmed by you then.

Now she wants to settle your debt to her and hence she makes you suffer this time. That is called a karmic relationships in buddhism. Hence one must suffer in each lifetime. The key is to not get emotional and just go with the flow, that is the best way to handle these issues. That does not mean you should drop dead and do nothing. Just use the legal system and accept any outcome without getting emotional. If you manage to do that you will transform your karma into virtue and you will feel a lot better.

I believe a key issue in the western world is that people have forgotten everything about past lives etc and hence they are completely unaware of destiny and karmic relationships.

Try reading the book Zhuan Falun for a new perspective on human life, how to become a good person, supernormal powers, opening your third eye etc:

www.falundafa.org...

Wish you good luck!

reply to post by TheEndisNearer


if you can prove criminality or insanity to great degree you have a better chance
this is where hiring a detective comes in
re previous response you need to seem reasonable calm and respectful only on the outside
inside you must be aware of whats at stake
the law is not your friend
if i understand correctly about that file youve got she could be borderline sociopath or in worst case
scenario a full blown psychopath that has managed to slip thru the cracks after all to the military some types are acceptable
i'm not a psychologist but have personal experience from childhood
i was 6 when i realized daddy was dangerous crazy
the bottom line is do you want those kids to be infected?
they may not be lucky enough to have a "Valerie experience" as i did
against that type you are going to have to go for the jugular
just got up was very tired last night but felt i needed to say something going to reread whole thread
but for now
where is the girls father you could surprise her with a 2 prong attack have him come out of the blue demanding custody but only if he is a responsible person
maybe you can't use that file but if you still have it you could have your lawyer return it, and get a written acknowledgment that the file was stolen
forget joint you want full custody of both if the girls father is no good
you of course "are only concerned about the children and seeing that your ex gets the help she needs"
also watch your back you need to be wired for sound and video in your house and person at all times
it would be such a shame if you had an accident or aloww yourself to be tricked into looking
crazy or violent

Originally posted by Gaussq
Welcome!

Sounds like a little rough ride there.

I will try to explain things from a very different perspective. Imagine you lived many past lives and you did some bad stuff in those lives. Imagine your ex girlfriend was harmed by you then.

Now she wants to settle your debt to her and hence she makes you suffer this time. That is called a karmic relationships in buddhism. Hence one must suffer in each lifetime. The key is to not get emotional and just go with the flow, that is the best way to handle these issues. That does not mean you should drop dead and do nothing. Just use the legal system and accept any outcome without getting emotional. If you manage to do that you will transform your karma into virtue and you will feel a lot better.

I believe a key issue in the western world is that people have forgotten everything about past lives etc and hence they are completely unaware of destiny and karmic relationships.

Try reading the book Zhuan Falun for a new perspective on human life, how to become a good person, supernormal powers, opening your third eye etc:

www.falundafa.org...

Wish you good luck!

Gassq-

Excellent Thank You,

Your response and those who have followed is exactly the kind of knowledge i need to help my situation. I'm a Tiny bit educated on Budhism. A friend of mine 3 years ago reccomended me to read a book called the Tao of Pooh. He also told me about the story of The Stone Cutter. Gaining that knowledge gave me a new perspective on life and honestly helped me deal with a lot of what i have faced not only in my current situation but other trials as well.

I apporach each suggestion with an open mind and will definitly check into your recomendations. I will start reading the book you posted tonight. Thank You again Your response to my post means a lot!

Originally posted by DerepentLEstranger
reply to post by TheEndisNearer

 

if you can prove criminality or insanity to great degree you have a better chance
this is where hiring a detective comes in
re previous response you need to seem reasonable calm and respectful only on the outside
inside you must be aware of whats at stake
the law is not your friend
if i understand correctly about that file youve got she could be borderline sociopath or in worst case
scenario a full blown psychopath that has managed to slip thru the cracks after all to the military some types are acceptable
i'm not a psychologist but have personal experience from childhood
i was 6 when i realized daddy was dangerous crazy
the bottom line is do you want those kids to be infected?
they may not be lucky enough to have a "Valerie experience" as i did
against that type you are going to have to go for the jugular
just got up was very tired last night but felt i needed to say something going to reread whole thread
but for now
where is the girls father you could surprise her with a 2 prong attack have him come out of the blue demanding custody but only if he is a responsible person
maybe you can't use that file but if you still have it you could have your lawyer return it, and get a written acknowledgment that the file was stolen
forget joint you want full custody of both if the girls father is no good
you of course "are only concerned about the children and seeing that your ex gets the help she needs"
also watch your back you need to be wired for sound and video in your house and person at all times
it would be such a shame if you had an accident or aloww yourself to be tricked into looking
crazy or violent

edit on 3-1-2011 by DerepentLEstranger because: (no reason given)

edit on 3-1-2011 by DerepentLEstranger because: made a few corrections

First Thank You for your hard thought on my situation and your response.

Obviously at this point there is no question in my mind that my sons mother has a few bolts loose. Unfortinitly my lawyer does not seem to think that even with the military documentation that i have enough recent events or proof to show a pattern.

I do not know how but the entire duriration of this i have managed to stay calm, level headed and despite the bumps and conflicts have never acted out of passion. I have always kept a clear view of what is at stake and have been overly mindfull of my own reactions and actions.

The law is not my friend: I have discovered this. The law in America is not interested in the truth but figuring out the quickest way of appointing an outcome. Law has completly drifted away from it's intended purpose in this country. While the legal system is corrupt, i will remain loyal and ensure all my communications are of truth and regardless of evil claims against me i only speak truth and do not retaliate with dishonesty. My state of mind is that i will stay true to my convictions and present them in the way law is intended to have them presented.

As far as my sons mother being a psycho path i do feel as if she has cleaned up a little. Although i do believe it is because we have had her under a magnifine glass. I believe that after court she will let down her guard and go back to her old ways. More importantly with the focus on her every move i know my son is safe while with her. She is extremly clever and knows she has little room for error.

I have often thoguht about contacting her daughters father. I even have gone far enough that i have all of his contact information, a copy of his green card, social security number, home adress, phone number and facebook page. My only reservations here is how it would effect her daughter. Her daughter is an innocent party here and while there may be a way for me to exploit this to my benefit and gain, i believe that by me being a good person is enough and that turth will prevail. I would hate to place her daughter through any heart ache that is neccessary for her to go through. Trust me thought has crossed my mind but at this point i believe it would help me but hurt her daughter. I have truth on my side and that will be enough.

As far as the medical file, i have agreed in a written contract with each lawyer that i will return it to the proper authorities after court. I do not know if there will be repercussions for her when this is done but i will return it to the military base it was taken from.

When pressed im an extremly parinoid person and ive been pressed. I have recorded many conversations between her and i and opnely speak of everythign that goes on between us conversation wise. I have refused to communicate with her outside of email so that i have record of all conversation.

When it comes to watching my back, im mindfull that im dealing with someone who more than likely would consider physical harm to me but tend to rely on a spiritual belief that someone some where is protecting me because i have remained true.

His mother has attempted to push me into violencen or getting angry 3 times. Each time i responded as soon as i felt angry by kneeling to the ground closing my eyes and offering ym self open to attack. Surprisingly upon doing this, she stopped hitting/pushing me.

I appreciate your wisdom and hope you comment some more on my situation, your recommendations are very much thoughts of my own. That my friends tells me you and i are on the same page.

Thank You for the thought you put into your post. I know it took a lot of thought because it took me a lot of thought to come tot he same wisdom.

reply to post by TheEndisNearer


Thanks for your kind words, be sure to keep in mind that it is very hard to finish reading the book. Your dark karma will create interference for you whenever you want to read it since it knows it risks being eliminated if you finish that book.

I give you an example, I have a friend who really loved the book but every time he started reading it there is an emergency. So he said: "during my vacation I will finish it". At the same day of his departure his suitcase broke in pieces and in the replacement bag there was no room for the book.....


/Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance is good, Falun Dafa is good