Today, I'm 33 1/2 and still a virgin. It was the age of Jesus when he was crucified.

Sometimes the harder you look for something, the harder you push it away.
Stop trying, and just do something.
When you least expect it is when it will happen.
Then you will be in for a real spiritual experience. LOL!!

reply to post by bkaust


No, I was doing everything in my power to NOT be in this situation. I don't tell or even remotely imply that I'm even inexperienced.

OK guys and girls. Let's slow down a bit.

Let's try and stay focused on the "question".

"Do you think that my future will at least involve leadership like Jesus?"

Also keep in mind that this is the Gray Area, so let's stay far, far away from insults:

The Gray Area: The Gray Area is a discussion forum that provides a dedicated area for members to post their confessions, disclosures, and related extraordinary personal experiences. Like the highly speculative Skunk Works forum, The Gray Area will tolerate topics that may be unusually hypothetical or unproven for the purpose of vetting the stories of thread-starters by the ATS membership at large.

If you don't have anything productive to add to the thread, then rather move along.

And please keep in mind that prostitution is against the law in MANY places, so PLEASE don't advise anyone to seek a prostitute!

Thank you.

reply to post by realanswers


realanswers, you seem to possess a lot of patience and that is a good thing. If you are mentioning your sexlife in reference to you being more pure, then I can understand where you are comming from. If you are remaining this way out of keeping a certain purity to yourself. If it is because you are afraid of the ladies then that all together is a different situation my friend. Anyway on topic you may be on to something and god bless you for feeling his powers upon you to sense your potentials. As far as the ladies mabey adjust your standards and see what can happen.

Certain things and specially the timing of things happen when they need to happen for me. It's as if when I try hard to get a job or something, I don't get one. But, when I don't try at all, 2 or 3 employers on the same day tell me that I'm hired. That actually has happened to me like many other circumstances.

Look man its an extremely simple thing, you are an awesome and nice dude, and thus before you are able to seal any deals you are already perceived as a friend by the girl you are pursuing at the time. This, while it may seem is wonderful and my end in a chance to have intercourse, places you on the forbidden fruit list of that girl as she values you as a friend and advisor and thus refuses to jeopardize that asset. . . sex ruins good relationships. So, what you need to do is just go out and get laid by any means necessary so you can cease this belief that it has some religious cause. Your lack of . . . experience. . . does not stem from spirituality or energies or religious destinies, it stems from the fact that you are shy and allow an acquaintance to incubate too long, all the while you attempt to look for a sign that your courtesan is waiting for your advance. In this situation one must recognize that in most dating game situations, unless the guy gives the first sign of interest the girl will feel out of place making a move of approval. So in conclusion, walk up to a girl be assertive but proper, be fast, and for [SNIP] stop looking for answers outside of the box, for simple problems like this the answer is in that special blinds pot we all have. . . . and don't listen to psychics the only real psychics are to smart to get a job being one

Originally posted by OzWeatherman

Originally posted by bkaust
From a woman's perspective - I wouldn't sleep with a man that thought he was still a virgin because he thought he was to be a 'leader like Jesus' - that right there could be the reason you still are one.

Kinda creepy. Sorry, but I'm aiming for honesty.

This is exactly the answer the OP should be looking at

APPLAUSE

To expand on that, and not to pick on you...

I went through getting my BA without ever having a girlfriend. I had hooked up with a handful of women and never came to grips with why I could never start a decent relationship. The key is focus. It's good to get really deep into thoughts, this site is a great place to do it. IF you really want to find a girl you need to put it all down for a bit. The whole Jesus comparison seems to be a development of the ego. The key is to look deep and ask yourself, do you really WANT to be in a relationship. Not from a superficial standpoint, not to seem normal or gain respect, but to truly develop.

I wasn't in the same situation as you, but being a decent looking dude and being relatively normal throws me in the same pot. At 26 I finally met a woman that I fell madly in love with. Part of it is just waiting. All those cheesy sayings about love at first sight and fate and soul mates kind of ties into what you are saying. It seems like the forces of the universe allow two people to meet who share a lot in common.

Stop trying and start living. You'll probably trip and fall into the right woman along the way when you least expect it. Don't get caught up in the conspiracy lot or the "why am I single" jibber jabber too much, just grab your sack and plow ahead.

Or don't, it's up to you my friend.

reply to post by realanswers


Oh man... Hard to read your expression.

If you have some spiritual, religious or moral stance that you would like to maintain virginity, then you're doing great.

Although, with your expression, it is obvious that it has become part of your self identity. One that you aren't complete with. You raise topics about Joe and Christ to help justify your self image, but you don't believe 'em yourself as you're inquiring with the weirdo minds here on ATS (mine included).

Having sex is an easy effort. I'm certain many will share the old easy trick of showing up to the bar at 0100 for the easy pickings. But that's not what you're after either- otherwise you would have done it already.

May I suggest you find out what you want before you go making any moves this or that way? Spend some time in a sweatlodge, eat mushrooms (if they're legal in your area), sit in a tent with a notepad and pen and really ask yourself where your priorities are.

If you're doomed to be a Messiah to Yaweh an unfamiliar mythos to you- so be it. If you're a lonely fella who has never gained the skills to sack a broad and just need some practice, then get to it. If you're an odd mind that solicits advice from strangers and that sense of community is important- heck, you're already at it man!

But, don't go down to Las Vegas and rent a lady for a while just to shatter your self image. A shattered self image won't do you any good if you don't know what is important to you and where you want to go/be. I suggest sitting in a cave like Muhammad / going into the desert like Yeshua, and if you come back a porn star, a barefoot prophet to some mythos, or with another personal confession to ATS, then you'll be doing something you truly believe is important, and with that- you can't lose.

I hope I worded the thread right. I have this very bad headache pain and it's hard for me to do anything right now. I didn't want to say that I feel like Jesus, because that would be really crossing the line. I respect people and respect their religions. I believe in spiritual growth and becoming a better person.

reply to post by realanswers


Dude I know why you are not getting laid.

You spend waaaay to much time on this forum.

And not enough time in church(where you will find a nice woman) or at the grocery store where you will find single women.

I too was late in life getting laid.

But I just was not ready and did not want to have a relationship while I was having fun.

I did not even get married when I was your age.

I did not have the advantage of being attractive but I am HIGHLY intelligent.

You need to take a vacation.

Save your money up and travel overseas.

I suggest the Philippines.

Those women can do AMAZING things to a mans "morale".

I should know.

I married one.

It's very simple. If I'm in a relationship, I don't hold back anything. If I just met a woman the first day, I would not have sex because that would mean that that's the only thing that she would be after.
And yes, I did pass it up before for that same reason. And I would still do it again because that's the wise thing to do if you are looking to start a relationship.
Again, I rather not talk so much about my personal love life. I was just trying to make things clear to everybody that for my age and how long I've tried proves that there is more to this that involves a powerful spiritual control.
I wouldn't say it's a "curse" and I've already done spiritual detox & cleansing in case that was it anyways.
To many good things has happened to me for me to believe it was a negative force controlling my life.

Originally posted by realanswers
reply to post by bkaust

 

No, I was doing everything in my power to NOT be in this situation. I don't tell or even remotely imply that I'm even inexperienced.

ok, I also didn't mean to offend, just trying to be honest as a member of the opposite sex.

It must be like someone else suggested, the harder you try, the harder it is to get closer to what you want sometimes. Body language can play a key too - it's like i've been told it's always hard to get a partner when you're single, but as soon as you are in a relationship, everyone wants a piece!

But to stick to topic, I'm sorry but I don't see you leading like Jesus, BUT i'm not religious. Have you considered joining the church as a priest?

You're bipolar.

2nd line

reply to post by Jim Scott

Jim, not to be rude.... but the man thinks he's Jesus... I'd imagine if this tactic was used correctly(David Koresh/Chuck Manson) he'd be gettin some lovin. His went the other route. Just sayin theres been many who have claimed to be Jesus but only one has gotten it right so far.

Originally posted by realanswers
I've just turned 33 1/2 today. I've heard my times that that was the age of Jesus when he died on the cross.

The age of Jesus is actually the age of Pisces. Jesus is just a rehashed version of the ancient sun god Horus. He didn't actually live and wasn't a real person.

IRM

reply to post by Oneolddude


Oh my goodness!
I tell you the truth. My roommate is a single Filipina model. She said the reason I can't date her is because I'm her roommate. It sounds reasonable, but there seems to always be a reason with me that has nothing to do with them not wanting to hook up with me.
As far as going to church or the grocery store, I've done that a countless number of times.
I was raised a Christian, but I no longer subscribe to any religion since I've been an adult and learned a lot about life.

reply to post by Loki


I'm not bipolar. I even have more control over my feelings and testosterone than most men. It takes a good amount of things to get me angry if I try not to get angry. If I get angry, it really shows that I have a lot of testosterone.

I am a 26 year old virgin. And I am destined to be alone for my entire life. I am in the same boat as you are. You are not special, you are not a leader, and you're not Jesus. You never will be. Women don't see you in a sexual manner, because your personality doesn't reflect sexual attraction. You're "the nice guy" " the friend guy" that is the way it is. I learned this back when I was 24, after trying to hard to date a girl, she just didn't see me as boyfriend material. I am responsible, I own my own business, I'm not bad looking, I'm reliable, honest, caring, faithful and loyal. I'm pretty much exactly what every girl looks for in a man. But my personality, ( not my looks) lack sexual attraction. And because of this, I will be single for my entire life. I have come to accept it, and I no longer try to go on dates, even if I sometimes wonder what I'm missing, especially when all my friends are getting married and having kids, I know that life is not for me. I have learned to become independant, and don't need anyone to be with me. I am not afraid of dying a virgin.

You just have to figure out who you are, and what you want out of life. You don't have a set future, you don't have a destiny. You make that yourself, by your actions and your decisions. You may be religious, I am not. but religious or not, there is only one, and will always be, only one, Jesus Christ. And when you think about it this way, if Jesus was 33.5 when he died, and you're 33.5 now, shouldn't you be on the cross right now, already having been a leader?

Just write down want you want. Do you want to be a celibate priest? If not work on something else. Get on youtube and search for videos for dating and how to meet girls. I stumbled on one guy that had excellent videos on there. I wasn't even looking for such videos but I tend to stray on youtube. It's easy. Do you live in a small town? That may be a problem with not meeting enough girls. Go out and have fun. Don't appear creepy. Girls will recognize a guy who is having fun and is assertive. You might be giving the wrong signals to the girls who just want to be friends. I wondered what kind of signals I'm giving off when I'm just having fun in a club and a girl I don't know comes up to me and says she wants to take me back to her apartment and let me do whatever I want to her. She didn't even say hi or her name first. I didn't trust her and thought that was weird so I acted like I wasn't interested. However I'm like you in wondering why? What prompts girls to just want to be friends or want to jump in the sack without even saying hi to you first? My best idea is that I was probably acting like an alpha male and having a lot of fun in the club. That happens when I start drinking. I try not to drink too much because it seems like girls start taking advantage. However it may depend upon all the signals I'm giving off.

Decide what you want in life and go after it. Ask for things. If you fail, learn what you did wrong from others and try again. You'll only learn by trying.

If all you want is some action, I suggest catching a buzz and head to a local bar.
As my good buddy always said, "You've got to slay a few dragons before you get the princess."
Just go and have fun, let your inhibitions go and cab it home.
Wrap up as well, better safe than sorry.