The ego is connected to materialism

I make this post in the midst of reading a new book released about a month ago. This book is called "I AM" by Howard Falco. It has been a very pleasant read thus far (I'm about halfway through it) and I have especially found the part interesting where he connects the ego to materialism. I recommend it to anyone looking for a new self-help book.

Many people talk of the ego and I do not believe they really know what the ego is. I hear some say they can "get rid of their ego." I personally do not feel this can be done. The ego can be greatly reduced, but the ego itself is the part of you that works to justify who you BELIEVE you are. When your beliefs about yourself match up to your true reality, the ego does not have much work to do. It is when they ego finds a conflict in who you believe you are and the world that surrounds you that it becomes active and can cause one to break down and submit to it.

For example, someone who believes they are the hardest worker in their workplace gets fired for being late and showing a lack of motivation/lethargy while on the job. Since the person's beliefs do not match up with their current environment (being fired) the ego senses a state of incongruity. This causes the ego to become desperate to prove the belief the person holds. The person may say "My boss never treated me fairly," or "I hated my job anyway." This can many times leave a deep seeded sense of anger or frustration in the subconscious mind of this individual. This person will act out in ways they cannot pair with the original problem (the incongruity with the belief and environment concerning the job firing).

In my case, I would subconsciously drink more alcohol when something did not match my belief and caused me distress. My ego would turn to the materialistic side by using alcohol to cope with the conflict. My frustrations would subconsciously manifest after feeling quite intoxicated. The last time this happened was when the girl I believed I would spend the rest of my life with told me something that caused me to break it off. My ego took control and began to act desperately to justify my original belief. At that time, I was rather upset and looking for answers in all the wrong places. I was going to friends to make sure what i did was the right decision. I was angry and bitter about relationships saying they were worthless. I was looking everywhere but inside for my answers, and it caused more problems than solutions.

So where DO you look for answers? How DO you stop the ego? Well, for one, one has to find the actual truth of the situation they find themselves in, objectively speaking. Now, how does one get to this point if their ego is overactive because it is still trying to justify the previous beliefs? Well, I believe we have to start with changing our beliefs about who we are from a materialistic approach to an approach of our feelings/ who we truly are in our inner self. Our inner self holds all answers, but the materialistic world combined with ego's desire to prove your beliefs right as quickly as possible, tends to take control and serve as a quick, but temporary, fix.

For example: "I am wealthy." If one suffers great monetary loss and struggles to pay bills, the ego sees this incongruity and begins to cloud the mind of the true situation at hand. "I am broke RIGHT NOW, but I may or may not be broke in ten minutes." Beliefs begin to cause frustration and stress, further clouding the mind, and further causing negative emotions.

If the belief is negative and the environment is negative, one is left with a reduced ego state but negative emotions. If a belief is positive and environment ends up being incompatible with the belief, the ego goes to work and causes negativity. If the belief is positive and the environment is positive, the ego state is reduced and positivity is the main feeling one will have. The problem occurs here when materialism creates a temporary positive state that can alter one from seeing the REAL truth of their situation. If one believes they will win the lottery and they do, sure they will be positive at that time, but what happens if they run out of money? They have to go back and find out what REALLY can permanently make them happy.

Now, lets look at true emotions from the inner self.

Replace the materialistic ego with the true feelings of the inner self and see what happens,

Instead of "I am wealthy." "I am the owner of a nice car." "I have a great job" replace them with: "I am loyal." "I am loving." "I am compassionate." "I am appreciative of being alive."

If these feelings are your true belief of who you are, no situation can cause you incongruity. You may still experience negative obstacles in life, but you will see them objectively from almost a third person perspective and be able to clearly deal with the situation without causing anymore harm to yourself. Are you not still loyal if your roommate steals money from you? Are you not still compassionate if your girlfriend breaks up with you? These things are out of your control if your true beliefs of who you are include those above feelings and therefore are shown in your everyday behavior. This person has a clear mind with a reduced ego state. This, to me, is the key to finding answers in life that are right in front of you yet you may have never even noticed. the good thing is one can start fresh RIGHT NOW with looking inward for beliefs and immediately begin to clear their mind and find the answers they are looking for.

reply to post by Subconsciously Correct

Totally. It's all about being in touch with reality, particuarly the objective reality of who you are. The more out of touch with this reality, the more neurotic you will be.

But an ego out of touch with reality will actively avoid, as a defense mechanism, being put back in touch. Thus it usually takes a rough lesson in humility (a sort of "rock bottom") before this happens.

I couldn't agree more with what you are saying!

The fact is everyone is the same we are human and it doesn't matter which objects you posses or who you know or what you know! Human is all your ever going to be!

We are all equal!

It is a shame people think otherwise and it is a shame people believe other wise!