What I thought was curiosity, has exploded into a quest.

Greetings ATS,

My journey into the realm of conspiracy theories has been a quick to descent into what I can only describe as overload madness. The information I gathered while lurking upon the boards has been startling, engaging, mystifying, and at times complete lunacy.

For years I considered myself to be well informed, even on the more eccentric bits and pieces of information presented to me. I read newspapers, political books, articles regaling scientific breakthroughs and achievements. I even believed most of what the media told me, though I always felt as if things followed scripting. In cartoons and novels, journalists were always scrambling for a scoop, exposing corrupt politicians, bringing down corporations, standing on the frontline of knowledge, guarding the public and truth against the oppression of tyranny. Slowly but surely my beliefs were chipped away, and I started to laugh at the half truths, the 'veiled' biases, the outright propoganda...Still I thought, it's ok things aren't that bad.

At a young age I began postulating that civilization rested upon a knifes edge, always teetering on the brink. Drawing from historical precedents taught in school (shocker) and independent information gathering, I saw the rise and fall of empires. I thought this could happen to us. I worried, I paid more attention, I decided to become political, maybe one person could change the world? I decided to pursue higher education, to work from the inside and help...University was the beginning of the end...Wasn't it supposed to be a free exchange of ideas? Weren't we supposed to be discovering facts, having epiphany's, arguing, debating, and contributing? Thats what I was told...That was a lie...

Politics I soon found was nothing more then a charade, enacted for the public. We had no control over the issues, the system was broken and we had lost our way. I wondered how can such things be? Why can't we all decide that things are bad and change it? This is when I realized that I may control myself but the rest of the world, they're stuck not even questioning, just lamenting the way things are... I mean, what solves the worlds problems? I wrestled with the questions, and still the answer evaded me...frustrating.

Spiritually...I was fed up. Church lost meaning around the time puberty hit, I tried other organized religions, and though I respect everyones beliefs, to me it was just lacking that fundamental element...the divine. Where was it? How come we needed to believe in it? If my life is predestined then the evil or good I commit was chosen by the almighty and why should he be mad if I do what he designed me to do? They say it's unknowable the will of everything, then I say my petty allegiance shouldn't matter and it'll love me like a parent should.

Supernaturally, I do actually believe in the unknowable. I have had psychic friends, who have indeed made me a believer. How do you react when someone thousands of kilometers away can hear your unspoken questions, or describle the room you're sitting in down to the color of the cup in your hand? What could you do with these individuals? It's like knowing the secret identity of a superhero...you know things you don't want to, and there isn't any one you can tell who will believe you.

So I laugh, I learn and I seek. It's because of sites like this that I things I don't know seem more within my reach. It's scary and exhilarating and I wake up each morning with a thirst to know more. It's a pandoras box I've opened and I couldn't be more confused or happy.

(Sorry if this isn't a good way to introduce yourself, but this is me)

reply to post by the cynic jester

Your intro was alot better than some shot I didnt even intro myself I just jumped in.
So welcome to ATS youll fit in just fine

reply to post by the cynic jester


That was great! Reminded me of my self in many ways. Keep your head up, and see you around the boards!

Thanks for the support. I'm not sure what to believe anymore, there's so much to process. Project bluebeam bothers me the most I think, because if thats true...and they'e getting ready to use it, how could I guard myself if I didn't know to question what I was seeing...I've tried discussing some of things I've found on here with friends and relatives, I've learned very quickly to only tell them things in small doses. I wonder if TPTB get the same headache I do?

reply to post by the cynic jester


Yes, very small doses. To be honest, I went through a whole stage of being interested in things like Blue Beam, and 2012, and NWO, but in the end there are so many other things in our world and our society that need close attention and changing that I have no time for those things. Some of them may be true, and I applaud the people who continue to put in long hours of research on them, but what are you going to do about it? How can you have an direct effect and stop something so powerful as those things? To the contrary, you CAN change society, and in doing so you will ultimately open the doors to these other things. Just my .02 for ya.

Good intro,
You'll find yourself Not telling people a lot of what you find out, because they start looking at you like you're crazy
Also, it's a good idea, every now and again, to give your head a little shake, let the brain empty out, and start over. All the info does get overwhelming at times, take it all with a grain of salt, and research, research, research. It's a weird world out there.

hey jester...the only bit of advice i can give when dealing with such huge things like 2012 or project bluebeam...ya know the big things that one person cant really do anything about if they are actually true...is just to try and stay informed as well as you can...they are fun and interesting things to read about and study up on...but as far as trying to change everything and the world yourself can be overwhelming....there is one thing you can do. be the change you want to see in the world. thats the one thing that i do. for example...i cannot believe that profanity has run amok like it has...grown people are at the point where they cant even say one sentence without saying 5 or 6 curse words...profanity on family shows on the tv teaching our young children how to talk like an idiot...showing them that its ok to speak like an ignorant fool....if you play any console games like xbox online..you can hear the kids..when playing online...they say nothing but curse words and its really sad..its almost like they dont know any others...i myself use to talk like this....i stopped using profanity and am teaching my son that tptb...imo...are pushing this profanity on him and all of us. i sorta gave him a visual of what it would be like 100 years from now if our language continues to be dumbed down like it is...and i used the movie "Idiocracy" as my reference...if you havent seen that movie, go watch it and you will see what im talking about....so eliminating profanity from my vocabulary and teaching my child the problem with it is just one thing ive done in my life that i want to see changed.....so yeah...you be the change that you want to see. thats a very good starting place if you as me.

Welcome aboard!
If you need any tips or pointers, never hesitate to ask.

Very nice intro. Welcome aboard. Beware or you will be posting on the Im a ATS addict thread soon enough! This is a great site to gather, disregard, and learn. Your thinking on a lot of things may very well undergo some changes. I also agree with the rest of the posters. Baby steps with what you try to share with others.

reply to post by the cynic jester



Hi cynic jester, and welcome to the ATS community. For now, you can reply to any thread in any member forum you wish, as well as send & receive (PM's)Private Messages to Staff only.
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Welcome!
You're gonna love it here! SO much of what you say rings true for me as well!
All we can keep doing is search for truth!

reply to post by the cynic jester


Hello jester, and welcome

I enjoyed reading your intro, and I truly understand where you're coming from. When you mentioned curiosity exploding into a quest, I think most ATS'ers can relate. It is all too easy to be investigating point A, then encounter point B that needs back-research. Then before you know it your bookmarks, files, papers, notebooks, and research have branched out so far you don't know how the heck you got there! And even worse, you end up touching basics on so many topics it becomes hard to properly research everything you want. You become overwhelmed and lost.

A person recently told me, "Theres just not enough time to learn it all which tells you theres something else you are here for that doesnt involve learning everything."

And you touched upon changing the world. Man... researching "shadow government," NWO, government lies, education systems based on degradation, food/water poisoning, spiritual negativity conditioning, media propaganda, etc., all of this made me angry, sick to my soul!

I figured out that personally, all I can do is effect positive change in myself. Hope that my good deeds spread in the hearts of my family, my friends, and this can spread the positive vibes like a virus... starting with me!

"You must be the change that you want to see in the world." [Mahatma Ghandi]

"If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change." [Michael Jackson - Man In The Mirror]

The world is your mirror. Take all of the information you learn to effect positive change, positive thinking, positive speech, positive decisions, positive actions, thus becoming light to those around you.

Peace, and may your quest for knowledge benefit you!

I agree that everything needs to be in moderation, I joined specifically because I've been so surprised by reading alot of intelligent discussion on everything from the most outlandish theory to the most well reasoned argument I've read. Both were refuted, both were supported. It's fascinating really. I also agree about being the mirror, or changing only what we can and always for the better. I personally try to be pleasant to everyone, even telemarketers calling me during the dinner hours. So many misunderstandings, so much hate can be overturned through a friendly demeanor even when you disagree...Everyone has their limits though and waiting inline at walmart is my own personal hell.

Welcome to ATS.

Remember not to get too caught up... not all you read, see or listen out there is true, but not all is false either - as long as you keep questioning you'll filter it out... oh and always get a second opinion

Well I'd say you came to the right place. Hope to see some interesting threads.

Yeah.. when you first start looking into these kinds of things the ideas that are put forth tend to make you a little crazy. It's like learning an alternate history running parallel to everything you have ever known. I will tell you though, that crazy schizo feeling will fade a bit as you start to reel yourself back in. Also a good warning, the things that click and have a higher possibility as truth can make you more susceptible to getting on board with some of the down right insane and lunatic ideas. You will think "well if this is possible, than that could be as well." Remember to remain rational there is a lot of B.S. to be found as well. So if you start to feel overwhelmed take a step back and remember to keep your head, you'll need it if you intend on finding any actual truth.

we are just what we dare to be.
we try to understand what we perceive, the more we understand the more we can try to explain, but the mystery will forever be, but that is ok, because WE ARE part of the same mysterious something that makes us AWARE!

reply to post by the cynic jester
Welcome cynic jester,I have to laugh I felt compelled about a year ago to do research on the computer and my mouth hung open for about the first four months.If I've learned anything I think its how to see more of the truth in the world around me,and to keep faith in the people that the truth will always prevail.I think if anything we live in exciting times...again welcome!!

reply to post by the cynic jester


Welcome,

Can I give you some advice?
Make sure you don't swap the real world by relegating it to a lie, for the internet conspiracy world as the only truth. It's all about balance.

Good luck.

I find it incredibly hard looking at the world the same way now. I question my entire basis of knowledge having read a few threads. If I am to 'wake up' then I need to broaden my perspective. I was headed down this road of self discovery already, my psychic friends, novels, comic books, and movies had already jump started me. Finding this site has only allowed me to connect more dots. I laugh when you say don't disregard reality, because I've been there. Becoming fatalistic is a side effect of knowing too much, and you forget to live. We live in interesting times, monumentous possibly. It's times like these you need to keep your head squarly upon your shoulders.