What is wrong with Me? Or Us?

Hello my friends...

I had a hard time deciding where to put this. In one sense it is a rant, because I am reaching a breaking level point in a sense, yet, on the other hand, this breaking level point is messing with my thoughts on ascension and trying to be a better person.

Pardon me if I ramble for a moment.

Let us take "ascension" for a moment. One of the basic keys to that ( from what I have read, and believe in my heart) is, it is all about love for you fellow man. Well, yes, that makes perfect sense. Another is we are all ONE. That makes sense as well. Lets just say for the record to keep this short and sweet, I understand those fundamentals.When I am left in my own little world, in my home, with my garden and wildlife, it is very easy to conceive.

But then, I step out of my safe zone of peace and run across myself (if we are all one), being a idiot. I see myself crossing the road at a green light against traffic taking my sweet time. I see myself having someone let me cut into traffic without so much as a simple thank you. I see myself living off the state and mad because I don't have a bigger tv that I think I deserve.I see myself being a criminal, a person who lies to get ahead, a person who thinks nothing of tossing trash into the street out of my window.I see myself creating a war because my God of love is better then someone elses.

The list could go on and on, but what the bleep is the matter with me?

Now we have the actual me that just wants to run over the idiot crossing the road in front of me, not letting anyone cut in because they just think it is there right with no acknowledgment of a thank you,a person mad because it is apparent you are capable of getting a job, quit whining about the flat screen you all ready have, that I have paid for you through my own hard work, that's bigger then the flat screen I don't even have... ugh this list could go on as well...

Don't get me wrong, I also see much beauty around me and see so many trying to help their fellow man, or, themselves as we are all one, but, still...these angers that arise in me from ignorance just really upset my balance.

I try sooooo hard to find a inner peace,but sometimes I just feel like going postal.... What is wrong with me?

reply to post by yigsstarhouse

That is to say, the whole purpose of spiritual life is to transcend the ego and, thereby, reside in the native rapture of the divine. But doing so is no easy matter. Indeed, it is fraught with perils of all kinds, not least of which the devotee's own egoic nature. According to Adi Da: The crisis [the Guru] serves in the individual does not negate. It illuminates, perfects…. I have often used this image of the sunlight over the well. When the sun shines directly into the well, all of the creeps that hang around deep under the water start coming up the sides. Then a few minutes after noon they quiet down again. As soon as they can find a little shade, they quiet down again. The time you spend in Satsang [the company of the Guru] is like time spent with the sun directly over the well. The more time you live in Satsang, the more these slithering things arise, the more you see of your egoic self, the more you must pass through the crisis of personal self-understanding. However, the irony is this: whereas it is true that the creepy-crawlies only emerge in the presence of sunlight, and their emergence thereby thought of as caused by the sunlight, the sunlight did not create their existence-they were there the whole time. To put it somewhat differently, the accusations and complaints brought against Adi Da are partly true and partly false. In the presence of the sublime, spiritual sunlight of Adi Da, creepy-crawlies are, indeed, stirred noticeably into life. That much is true; and an extremely unpleasant truth it is, too. Yet, that is the whole point of spiritual practice in the company of a Guru. Devotees bring their creepy-crawlies with them into the Guru's presence, as part of who they are-for the purpose of being purified. But the presence of these creepy-crawlies is not the Guru's fault, nor is the excitation that brings them to the surface. To blame the Guru is to be ignorant of the true nature of the spiritual process, and irresponsible for the role you play in it. Truly responsible men and women own up to this. It's as simple as that.

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reply to post by yigsstarhouse



Yigs nothing is wrong with you, in fact I would say your current awareness is wonderful.

Your current state actually makes you a being with a conscious or at least someone who is aware of there actions, being able to post your thoughts freely takes courage and asking for help also shows a higher spiritual awareness.

Inner peace is attained by not reacting, you see you are in charge.

There are two types of people in this world.

First is the victim mentality.

Second is the person who accepts everything they do and the choices they make.

The first group gives their power away to everyone else and everything else, so then they are never in control, hence the victim mentality.

The second group accepts every challenge in life and believes that they are the master of their own destiny, thus remaining in control and getting back up after every curve ball, but also enjoying the fruits of their choices.

Yigs my Sister,

On days like that, go home and play some music to get you back under control. That is your strength. You only have control over your own free will, what others do with theirs you cannot help. Judge them not. Most are not even aware that they have control over their own will. They walk through life with blinders on, reacting not acting. They are like babies first learning to walk. Scold them not, find humor in their folly.

With Love,

Your Brother

Originally posted by Realtruth

First is the victim mentality.

Realtruth this is some Real Truth.
I feel that the apocalyptic bottomless pit,
that which vapors up forever and ever in darkness,
is victimology. Ever notice that when people drop out
they always have a very elaborate and detailed story about why?

I am more interested in what I am running towards than what I'm running from.

Take fundy Christians. I still can't figure out why they can tell me
more about the devil than the saviour. They seem to know
an awful lot. Thoroughly trained in the wrong direction.

In Shindin Zukuri (Japanese rock gardens) the idea
that everyone can have a sacred garden in their
heart, and no one can touch it, is how one
can maintain their serenity in the face
of negativity and pit diggers.


David Grouchy

reply to post by yigsstarhouse


We are all one because of things like we are all on 1 planet , we are all 1 species, we all breathe, we all bleed..... simple stuff like that. Don't read more into a phrase like "we are all one" than you can PROVE.

Most people are on a path of learning. Everyone makes mistakes. Have you ever been taken care of? Have you ever made the mistake of cutting someone off and being too embaressed to acknowledge it? Ever crossed the street too soon or too late and took your time cause you had the slight chance of getting someone to notice you and REMEMBER you?

You're no psychic. You have no idea what someone is thinking, so don't lump yourself or me into the same catagory as someone who truly wants to see the world burn just because we are human.

The cells of my hand make no apologies for the cells of my feet. The pain in my lower back is not the fault of the muscles in my forearms. And still, they all belong to the whole of my body and they are my body. This is the mystery of Identity - where the delineated aspect can be both unique and in union with the larger whole at the same instant.

Humankind is one whole and you are the other whole. Then, there is the whole of your family and the whole of your community.

We are corporeal beings for a short period of time, and we need to embrace the functional purpose of corporeal existence if we're to gain properly from this stage of our overall development. When you were in grade school, no one insisted that you ignore the curriculum just because you'd be graduating eventually to middle school. Same with middle school and high school. Your studies were centered on the stage of educational development that you were in at the time. It's odd that so many New Age types insist that the proper way to experience corporeal existence is to deny it or overcome it. Maybe there's value in experiencing it? Maybe there's something to learn from corporeal existence?

Getting angry - experiencing the surge in chemicals that occurs when you get really mad - is something that can only occur as a corporeal being? Maybe it's important to know what it feels like to lose your temper? Maybe it helps you understand that failure in a more profound manner?

If a god is all-knowing, then it has sinned every sin and in every possible way of sinning each sin. If not, then it's not all-knowing.

reply to post by yigsstarhouse


Nothing is wrong with you, yig.

It is very difficult to live in this world.

Originally posted by catwhoknows
reply to post by yigsstarhouse

 

Nothing is wrong with you, yig.

It is very difficult to live in this world.

Someone asked Yogananda if there is a Hell.
He replied,"Where do you think you are?"