reply to post by Muckster
Very perceptive Muckster, very well done.
My best friend is a Native American and when her son turned 12 they had a "coming of age" ritual at a pow wow.
There is a basic physiological human need for both boys and girls coming of age to celebrate, a right of passage it use to be called. A acceptance
into the group.
Now days it takes the form of joining a gang, or skull and cross bones (Bush / Gore), the masons, boyscouts, girlscouts, the softball league, etc.
Your story affected me profoundly because my oldest son at one time was a member of a gang.
When he was born I named him after one of the four arch angels and told him I did so because I felt after carrying him (he punched and kicked inside
of me for five months straight) that he would need a really good guardian angel to watch over him.
One day, my son and several other members of his "gang" were on a drug run into the city (we live in a nice middle class suburb).
They arrived at their destination and got out of the car. My son was riding shotgun, in front on the passagger side.
My son said that as he stood there, he heard something wiz by his right ear, just a wizzing sound for a brief second by his right ear.
The young man in back of him dropped to the pavement, blood seeping all over the cement.
The driver said, "get in now or I'm leaving you we're outta here"
My son turned around and saw the young man that had ridden behind him was now clearly dead.
My son got back into the car and silently they rode back home.
After that incident, he knew there was a higher power mama had pleaded to - to protect him.
He quit the gang, they put a contract out on him, he was committed for over a year at a cost of a second mortgage (150,000), a small price to pay for
the life of your son.
Now, at 33 he sees how misguided he was and how desperately my husband and I tried to save his arse.
He has a job, lives with a really sweet and kind woman and has a daugher that will be my only grandchild.
Once in passing he said to me, "mom, I thank you for believeing in me and protecting me when I got in over my head."
That is what family does.
Your story affected me profoundly because in my early 20's I always thought, if I obey "the rules", work hard, do what is right this "bad stuff"
will never happen to me.
Well, it does, it affects all of us.
I am thankful my son is safe, matured and passed this situation.
See the movie "The Ya Ya Sisterhood".
Good movie, we all need a yaya sisterhood.
[edit on 2-8-2010 by ofhumandescent]