Its 10pm. Do you know where your children are?

Some of us here on ATS know plenty of things, we know about UFO's, Government conspiracies, Religions, etc. Now with that being said. I was wondering if we could go in a different direction concerning the above mention conspiracies, and widen them with what we can do about children of today.

The statistics of child abuse and neglect along with the rush adoptions, and even the facts about the corruption in the system, where children are lost, sexually abused, and even killed. Children are being taken away from their parents and not given back. There are reports of some 60,000 kids just in the U.K alone that were abruptly removed from their homes, and put through a rush adoption, and now the parents cannot get them back. These types of things are done, to certain parents, due to the demand of a child either the same age, or descriptive look, such as eye color, complexion, race.

Though there are children that need to be taken away from their parents due to these abuses, because of this many have either fell through the cracks, or have been used by the system to gain profit. We have now lost an entire generation of children to a system that wanted it that way. There are thousands of cases of children that were taken by the system, and if asked, no one knows where they are, or where they have gone.

No one speaks for the kids anymore. And because of the system that has been put into place, instead of other adults standing up for kids that were being abused, we asked the government to intervene. Children today when possibly needing discipline (not beatings) threaten their parents with the same government that was supposed to help.

We fight more for unborn children, then the children that are already here. There are stories such as these that make it hard for me to think that with these atrocities we fight for things of less importance.

It was 1873. Mary-Ellen was 9 years old when a church worker, Mrs. Etta Wheeler, who had been asked to visit the family, found Mary-Ellen shackled to her bed, grossly malnourished, scarred and badly beaten. Mrs. Wheeler was so appalled by what she saw that she went to the authorities to report this horrifying child abuse.

The authorities turned her away.

But Mrs. Wheeler refused to take no for an answer; she petitioned the American SPCA.

Animals were protected, but children were not.

Mrs. Wheeler appealed to the ASPCA that children were members of the animal kingdom, and must therefore be protected. It was on these grounds that the ASPCA did finally intervene.

www.child-abuse-effects.com...


We hate whats going on with children today, how can we expect the future to be worth fighting for if when were dead, these same children will be left with the decision to keep this planet going? We left them with problems, and not the tools to know the difference between a parent that abused them or a system that claims to protect them?

There are people today that are protesting in the streets about taxes, or outside of a abortion clinic, or at the ASPCA, but no one at the house of a little girl thats hungry, or a little boys house where he has welts on his legs. Imagine if you will the system that we discuss here today, and we know adults that cant see the truth, imagine children. What do you think they see?

I guarantee you that there is someone out there that you know, or a child that needs a friend to listen, that we tend not to really see, we had programs in place for kids to get away, church's, playgrounds, and were filled with liars, child molesters, and kidnappers. We as a society left others to raise our kids, while we looked the other way.


Peace to you...

Hilary said
"it takes a village to raise our children"

I called her village....It seems thier Idiot is missing...

*Note *I do not have children

So forgive me if i am speaking out of place here But Relying on others to do your duty as a parent is WRONG If parents would take the time to get to know thier own children and set boundries and enforce rules we would not be in the situation we are now as a nation..

I was driving a friend home last night around 130 in the morning,
as we were pulling on to his street, we say a group of young teens sitting on a bench smoking ciggerettes .. i just looked over and shook my head.

how can these kids be allowed to roam the streets of New Haven at that time is beyond me...

S+F for this thread

~meathead

reply to post by NoRegretsEver


I agree, that something different needs to be done. If people see signs of abuse, they call the police, and the feds take the child away until the facts can be resolved. The problem being, the federal system is most of the time more harmful to the child than the abusive parent. The only solutions, would be so against the realms of morality that they would never be implimented. For example, All children are temporarily sterilized at birth. Once they have reached a certain age, likely 23, have shown that they are financially able to take care of a child, and have taken a three week course on parenthood, at that time they are able to have the free surgical procedure which will allow them to procreate. See, sounds horrible. Yet there may not be any other option to save the children of our future. If anybody else has any ideas, I'd like to hear them.

Heck yeah! she is here at home (as always) and reading a book.
I never let her go out alone with frinds (males or females), but I make sure there is a parent or myself accompanying the group.

Not that I dont trust my daughter, but there is such a thing as "friends" setting someone up for trouble or worse.

I never take chances, and I rather be safe than sorry because our kids just cant be replaced.

Even school bustop...my daughter is teenager, but I still make sure I get my rear end up every morning and drive her to the stop and stay until she is on that bus. Same for after school bus.

Too many times I see kids especially young girls walking home alone from school or bustop. I get very angry at the parents. No matter the neighborhood, people need to keep an eye out regardless.

Parents also need to confirm where their kids are for sure, some kids lie (YES, they sure do!) and even the good kids may have friends who are not so well behaved. So, for safety sake (so kids understand) it is a parents duty and responsibility to keep tabs on their kids and make sure those young ones (especially teens) stay out of trouble. If they cant stay out of trouble. then they should not be allowed out. Period and no exceptions.

reply to post by NoRegretsEver



If we did a serious root cause analysis I imagine we would find that 95% of the westernized world is still operating at the mental state of a child well beyond 30 years of age. A child cannot consider anything beyond itself. The adult has to surface for this to occur.

Abuse? Yes, people would get out of control or even enjoyed hurting kids.
But in my day, we got our rear ends whooped, and it WORKED.

Now, parents are intimidated by laws, the kids hold the laws as control over the parents.....not me.
When my teen boy wanted to do nothing but sit on his rear EVERY day and playvid games and not even do TWO chores, I had enough and told him early one morning, "Son, sit right here in this chair. I have something for you to do." After ho-hum, he asked what I wanted him to do. I told him
"NOTHING. Just sit there and DO NOT get out of that chair. Here is a bucket to pis in, and heres three sandwiches and juice. If you get up from that chair, I will hit your feet with this belt. You are to do exactly what you enjoy---nothing." He learned his lesson (ALMOST struck his feet but he got to his chair before I could reach him he he). Since then, though he did not like his game fest interrupted, he always made the effort to help out on occasion when I need it. He got the hint pretty well.

A funny island discipline is when a kid acts up, he is to (right on the spot with everyone watching) stand, hold both his ears and squat, stand up, squat, stand up, etc. Doesnt hurt him a bit except his pride is a little hurt, but those leg muscles sure develope nicely.

Im struggling to understand the point of your thread, but felt like i could contribute some empirically inspired points anyway.

The physical symptoms of neglect or abuse, such as malnutrition and lacerations, are in my opinion overemphasized in your thread. Or perhaps its just that you haven't presented these issues with a balanced understanding, which usually comes from first hand experience as a researcher or sufferer, of child abuse/neglect.

So Id just like to add that in my opinion, the emotional/physiological/psychological/spiritual effects of abuse and neglect are by far the most significant. A bruise is only skin deep (okay perhaps a little deeper), but disturbingly incompassionate and hostile parents need not raise a finger in your direction let alone punch you in the face for your mind to self-destruct in a frenzy of fear and guilt, which may leave you permanently traumatised, causing you to live your life with almost permanent stress, leading to depleted adrenaline, constant fatigue and possibly pre-mature cardiac arrest, due to the absence of one crucial developmental ingredient too many parents take for granted, or most damagingly dont take any notice of ~ compassion ~ love ~ respect ~ PEACE

reply to post by dreamwalker74


That's my point. We have drinking age laws, driving, etc. But none for child bearing. There was a woman in the 1990's that was offering woman sterilization for $300. This if course was mostly offered in areas that had the majority of drug and alcohol abuse, also cases that seemed to have the most children n the system. She was ridiculed as someone who just wanted minority children to stop being born, and because I bought up her method, I should state that she also said some rude comments that got her in trouble.

But I didn't see the fault in her offer, despite what type of person she was, her option was a good one. First being that someone sterilized can later have children by invetro, which cost money, but if you have the money for the procedure you probably have the money to take care of a child.

There are way to many people out there having kids to save their relationship, stupidity (like being drunk and no condom), and just no knowledge on sexual practices in general. While though the kid things is horrendous, in order for people to get in this situation they have to be having unprotected sex, which in its self is ridiculous. If its easy for one person to leave a child in the relationship, how easy is it for both?

We need to at least police ourselves by giving those we know now the knowledge of procreation, being a friend and being a parent are two very different things, except kids are having kids, so they just show what they know. We need to wake up to this, or our children and the next generation is doomed.

Peace to you...

reply to post by masqua


Makes alot of sense when you said "smothering with my own fear".
I am protective (can be considered overly becasue of my own past),
the kids are happy and do alot of things and are growing up. But they know also that they can always rely on me anytime.

I have some friends who let their kids do what ever they want, where ever, when ever. Those teens are not faring well and are getting into alot of trouble especially when they hang in their groups and to top it off, go to hoods that are known to be trouble. there are ways to allow young ones to grow up, but they need to be tought by example, with patience, understanding, open mindedness, and they MUST know there are repurcussions of their actions....someday the law will punish them, not ma and pa, and sometimes it isnt (unfortunately ) the law that gets them, but someone else.
I have seen a couple kids conducting themselves alright, but they were also disrespectful, etc, when the small group was in a larger one. Alot of kids dont do things because they are mean, sometimes they do things to be accepted or not be called a coward....Hey I teach my kids to know right from wrong, learn from OTHER peoples mistakes, and to never sway, because their friends are not going to help them walk their life path, but could get them to take the wrong path. In otherwords, some kids say "if you dont do this, you dont love me, etc" My kids know not to fall for that crap. They really are individuals, (still make a few mistakes of course), but they have good common sense and know there are repercussions if they are not careful enough to think first.

Yeah, I have quite a few scars myself, and oh boy, I sucked up the pains, because I knew my ma and dad would kick my butt for being stupid in the first place. though its not good to get hurt, I thought I did good by hiding injuries from their eagle eyes.

reply to post by NoRegretsEver

The statistics of child abuse and neglect along with the rush adoptions, and even the facts about the corruption in the system, where children are lost, sexually abused, and even killed. Children are being taken away from their parents and not given back. There are reports of some 60,000 kids just in the U.K alone that were abruptly removed from their homes, and put through a rush adoption, and now the parents cannot get them back.

Well the statistics are very misleading. What passes as abuse these days get significantly lower every year. For example im in my 20s my parents were hit with a belt if they were bad. I would not really care to turn this into what is the right and wrong way to raise a child, the fact is parents used to do it. Now my parents never hit me, well i think my mom slapped the crap out of me a few times but i deserved it and was 16-19 so she was not abusing a "kid". Today parents can't even discipline their children without social services being called. In fact there have been couples that have had their children taken away because they got pictures developed of their children in the bath naked. Now who here can say that their mom does not have at least one naked baby bath photo of them? Kids have even caught on to the fact that they can file false reports on their parents and get sent off to live in a foster home.

reply to post by masqua


The best advice I can give is that if you're scared to let your kids have some freedom, then don't have them. They'll only dislike you for smothering them with your fear.
----------------------------------------------------------------------


I agree some freedom is needed in order for them to grow, and sometimes mistakes need to be made to learn how to cope, nobody is perfect. I do not think children should be Coddled and i think living a Sheltered Youth is highly counter productive to the childs social and relationship building skills. not to mention the real value with gaining "some"street smarts.

That said, I also think its wrong when i drive down the road and see kids who dont look to be 15 years old sitting on a bench smoking cigarettes at 130 AM in a highly dangerous city like New Haven CT.

I also think there is a middle ground to be found between being over-protective of your kids and letting them live life. it just takes real hard work to become the parent who can find it

I guess what im saying is I agree with you overall, but its a much differant world than 48 years ago when you were 16 as well.


Respectfully,
~meathead

reply to post by DizzyDayDream


Yes, remember the old saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hut me?"

Well, Actually bones can heal when broken, names DO hurt even for a lifetime, and shattered hearts take forever to mend.

reply to post by Mike Stivic


Mike, you said it well.
Alot has changed, some freedom really is good along with rewards, etc.

You have a good open mind and understand well.

reply to post by triplereiki


Good post.

I raised two sons. One is just 40 and the other 36 and getting them through those early pre-teen and teen years was a lockerful of hurt for all of us.

Even though I wanted them safe and secure all the time, I knew it was hopeless to try. They HAD to go to school, HAD to play soccer, hockey and baseball and, sure enough, broken and legs happened. Drinking happened. Fights happened.

They didn't hang out with what I'd call 'Bad People', but they ran into them for sure. Like you suggested, it was up to me to be the kind of role model that they could emulate and compare that to the negative qualities in those types. I wasn't perfect, not are my sons, but they're a lot better than many teens I see these days. Is it the lack of good parenting? I dunno. Maybe there's somthing bigger going on, like a sense of hopelessness and fear that pervades our society today.

reply to post by zaiger


Yes the statics have been lowered since the government has intervened. It has made it easier for children to find better ways to abuse and neglect, out of fear of getting caught. That doesn't mean that it doesn't happen, it means that since this has been in place, less people cooperate.


How many children are abused and neglected in the United States?

Although the incidence of child abuse and neglect has been decreasing in recent years, more than 1.25 million, or 1 in every 58 children in the United States, were abused in 2006.

More than half (61 percent) of the children (771,700 children) were victims of neglect, meaning a parent or guardian failed to provide for the child's basic needs. Forms of neglect include educational neglect (360,500 children), physical neglect (295,300 children), and emotional neglect (193,400).

Another 44 percent were victims of abuse (553,300 children), including physical abuse (325,000 children), sexual abuse (135,000 children), and emotional abuse (148,500 children).

An average of nearly four children die every day as a result of child abuse or neglect (1,760 in 2007).

pediatrics.about.com...

Peace to you ...

Originally posted by Mike Stivic
That said, I also think its wrong when i drive down the road and see kids who dont look to be 15 years old sitting on a bench smoking cigarettes at 130 AM in a highly dangerous city like New Haven CT.

Gotta agree with you there. Where I live an 11PM curfew has been going for some time now for those under 16... mostly over vandalism. The youngsters should NOT be out after dark. Teenagers, maybe... if they're in a group of their friends. Alone at night is not a safe time for anyone, especially in unfamilar neighbourhoods.

I also think there is a middle ground to be found between being over-protective of your kids and letting them live life. it just takes real hard work to become the parent who can find it

You said a mouthful there. Another thing many don't know is that parenting often extends well into the adult years of a child. I know I'm still advising both my sons and one is heading into mid-life and all that might entail.

It never stops.

I guess what im saying is I agree with you overall, but its a much differant world than 48 years ago when you were 16 as well.

No kidding. When I was 16, my dad gave me $50 to take the train across the province to work as a Junior Forest Ranger and have an adventure in Canada's northlands. When I was 18, he did the same and I travelled ALONE from Ontario to Calgary, Alberta to find work (which I did). I cherish those memories as a cowboy for a summer and they are a huge part of who I now am.

[edit on 12/7/10 by masqua]

I forgot to thank you for this thread. It is not to point out if parents are good or bad, but what this thread can do is stop us a moment to think or see things we may want to change or even tighten up a bit if things are out of hand. some kids love being treated well, and reward us with respect in return, but some kids take advantage and abuse the love, trust, etc that the parents give....We all know we must draw the line sometimes, and enforce the rules which should be agreeable (kids/teens are people to and have feelings!) with everyone, and even allow kids form a reaasonable age to make choices....I was not allowed choices...when asked what I wanted for christmas I would name one thing LEGOS! andinstead I got a crap load of clothes and things I never wanted then they would be mad because the toys, etc would not be played with...well duh!

Or asked if I wanted pizza or hamburger, I say hamburger and they decided on pizza instead...Kids need to be offered choices and be treated respectfully as well.


Also my opinion in regards to having so many kids.....that is one of the reasons our population is way too much. there are folks who have 5 - 8 kids....What the heck!? Practice birth control! Seriously.

think about it, if each couple had two kids, then when they pass on, the kids are replacing. there is way off balance....sure its nice to have a large family but people do not think about what happens in the long run. Do the math, if each couple had two kids, there is balance.....but if people produce way more than that, there is without a doubt a huge problem, and think about those kids growing up and having a bunch more....It is our fault for this population mess. I myself had two, am happy and got my tubes tied. I am not a bunny, I know my limit.

I think sometimes its harder for good parents that want the best for their kids to raise them when their kids, have to play, go to school, and socialize with other children that don't have the same at home.

I becomes a competition in a way, when you want to say "no", and the reply is "but my friends are doing it". That's where real parenting has to kick in. Even when its things that you done when you were a kid and ended up ok. Mistakes will be made on both the parent and child's part, but there's a difference between being protective and being abusive, or even being concerned, and smothering.

Peace to you...

Thats a line out of an awesome dance track, has saxophones and everything.