What can I do to get over my paranoia?

I have had mixed luck with my social life. I usually don't have problems with my friends bit I have had problems with some friends. When I have had problems with them usually it has resulted in them not talking to me. They never told me why they stopped talking to me all of a sudden- some of these people were good friends and it was just because of one little thing I did or sometimes I didn't do anything and they stopped talking to me. I have had better luck with my new set of friends that I have made in the last 2 years, and while sometimes you just stop talking to people anyways, my past experience has built a sense of paranoia in me and i don't trust a lot of people that much. What could I do to get over it for good? I don't think not trusting your friends is healthy.

I guess what I want to know is how I can get over my mistrust for other people. I feel like I have been burnt out by other people in the past by people not following through on what they said they would do. It's made me feel kind of sad, and, at times it's gotten me to seclude within myself. I just want to know how to get over my paranoia I've gotten from these past events- because, I just want to live a normal life, but, I feel like my past events have gotten the best of me at times.

reply to post by Frankidealist35


None of it is easy baby, both in love and close friendships

It's the " not knowing " that really does the damage. I think once you have answers, somehow you can move on and try deal with situations, but when things remain unanswered it can screw you up bigtime

I can see why you mistrust people, it's the dread, the fear that they're going to leave you, as some of your friends have done in the past. So yeah, you withdraw into yourself, put up a defensive firewall so to speak

But life is too short baby to let the pain of the past ruin the possible happiness of the future.....please don't hide yourself and your feelings away cos it's sooooo destructive.
If those friends abandoned you with no explanation, then they were never true friends anyway !

Hope everything works out for you....

peace n luv

It's your own personal autonomy that carries you. You can spend days by yourself without worry........ I almost sense that about you. Tell me I'm wrong?

So, perhaps you are comparing yourself in some small way with others around you that always seem to be at the heart of the action, the party animals, the people who really need people around them, validating them, passing approval to make them feel whole. Hey, there's nothing wrong with that, far as I can see, but it doesn't do much for a person who's awake at 3:15 and wondering if they are missing out on something, somewhere.

You make your own way, and you dream and create your goals and somewhere along the line, likeminded people show themselves. You don't NEED each other at first, but then later, you find that you choose your own family and hopefully, they choose you too.

The important thing is that you know what makes you happy, and you can provide that, and revel in the joys of the passing of the days, without regret. Regret. That's a bad one; one of the few things that can haunt a person thoughout their days if they let it. Better to act and laugh at yourself later than to let your momentary fears cause you to hesitate at the presentation of beneficial opportunity.

Dont' forget to laugh and smile. You body loves endorphins.

Nothing you can do....because they ARE after you....



[seriously though]....

Just say, "What's the worst that can happen to me?"
and then, analyze the situation....could it have that outcome?
If not, then proceed.
If so, then proceed, with caution.

jus dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo it
dont be scared of anything hun

reply to post by Frankidealist35


Meh, friends?

Sounds like most were acquaintances and those usually suck, see the way it works with acquaintances is everyone is just leeching off eachother in some way, mutual friendship, i mean you know its some sort of resource.

company is resource, so trade it like a commodity to those that suck, sell em off and buy new ones...

Now friends, those are rare, when you find em you keep cuz a true friend always gonna be there for you, dont let acquaintances fool you into true friendship.

That's true...there is a big difference. I'm fortunate enough to have some really good friends...folks I know I can count on if the chips were down, and they know they can count on me... Heck, it's been tested a few times too, as luck ebbs and flows in all of our lives. We've been there for them, they've been there for us, etc. It's a good feeling, and definitely worth pursuing (and holding onto).

Real friends would give you a REASON if they are distant all of a sudden. If they don't, then they simply weren't that to begin with.