Man arrested at LHC claims he's from the future!!!

A would-be saboteur arrested today at the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland made the bizarre claim that he was from the future. Eloi Cole, a strangely dressed young man, said that he had travelled back in time to prevent the LHC from destroying the world.

The LHC successfully collided particles at record force earlier this week, a milestone Mr Cole was attempting to disrupt by stopping supplies of Mountain Dew to the experiment's vending machines. He also claimed responsibility for the infamous baguette sabotage in November last year.

Mr Cole was seized by Swiss police after CERN security guards spotted him rooting around in bins. He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender. Police said Mr Cole, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

crave.cnet.co.uk...

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[edit on 1/4/2010 by Mirthful Me]

the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening

Yes! I so hope this is true! But i'm not believing anything today.

-E-

Originally posted by MysterE

the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening

Yes! I so hope this is true! But i'm not believing anything today.

-E-

He also was trying to sabotage the Mountain Dew machine. LOL =)

So this is all the proof we need that global warming is a scam! Kit-Kats still exist and would otherwise melt!! Thanks goodness we still have Kit-Kats in the future.

Don't you just love April 1st?

Oh man....enough with this crap already!

I wasn't inundated with this much BS,even when April Fool's was funny back in grade school.

reply to post by CanadianDream420


ok im thinking of the movie 12 monkeys john titor here

dream becomes reality reality becomes a dreams

ohh Willy Wonka I need a chocolate bar ohh wait my hands are trembling i see something shiny a golden ticket after all the excitement
i finaly calmed down to actually read the ticket
i read the last line on the ticket If this Ticket revealed April 1st and there after it is not considered valid or to be claimed after the 31st of March oh boy where is that time machine !

Originally posted by CanadianDream420
"The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

Right, because limitless power and elimination of poverty should be prevented.

What a crummy publicity stunt.

Originally posted by traditionaldrummer

Originally posted by CanadianDream420
"The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

Right, because limitless power and elimination of poverty should be prevented.

What a crummy publicity stunt.

Yes but with that comes limitless kit-kats, which we should all know inevitably leads to disaster and nuclear winter.

While there are those that might consider this posting something of an April Fools Day prank and in such a case, a laugh track would be appropriate. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

On the other hand, there has been sufficient discussion here on ATS about the same subject. While the media release was worded to sound as if the person was some mental case, I would ask you a blunt question. How did the man disappear from authorities?

If the man was from the future and if those at LHC did not believe him, he would still be branded some nut case and if he indeed had a time machine and it was not a blender, then that time machine device is now probably in the hands of CERN scientist. If not, then it implies that the time traveler retrieved his time travel device and then disappeared with it and his 20oz bottle of Mountain Dew. If he used his original device to disappear, it implies a cover up and a hoax cover story for the masses.

The remark about him looking for fuel for his time machine in the trash is written as if it is some laughing joke and then the remarks about Mountain Dew and you have a complete discredited incident that for the most part will never even register on the fluoride brain dead neurons of those that could care less as long as the pizza and beer holds out while they watch American Idol and go ooh, aah, pass the pizza.

Time will tell if indeed this mystery man is ever found again. It is interesting that he should disappear from a lockup. All these little things make me suspect a Trixy on April Fools Day, but if this is not a hoax story, then what we were presented was not about fact, conjecture or theory dealing with the claim that he was a time traveler. While it makes sense to me to discredit and make the news coverage appear as a joke, and leave it to the masses to consider the event as just another insane nut job who has seen one too many movies.

On the other hand if he was the real deal, treating his press media coverage as a joke is the only way to discredit the incident so no one asks questions or thinks beyond the laughter of Aprils Fools Day. Real questions that might reveal much more would be prevented. Who knows, but I for one hope he was able to do what he needed to do before getting so relaxed that he needed a soda break at the Mountain Dew Machine which really must have seemed like a monument to mankind from his perspective.

I mean, really, has anyone see the new soda machines these days? They are spectacular and to someone who just dropped in, any coke machine let alone the Mountain Dew Machine would still appear to a time traveler like arriving in Las Vegas and seeing all the bright and colorful Vega Casino lights that truly capture ones attention and makes one stop and look.

Anyway, this incident is either real or it is a joke. If it is not a joke, then ignoring what happened and what was reported relative to what cannot be explained,like his disappearance from a holding area would generate the need to remain non-judgmental and to remain open to the possibility that we don't know everything.

While the LHC scientist are probably the only ones who really know if this was a joke or if this was an incident that will be added to the many other LHC incidents that keep telling us that we are no longer in Kansas with our little dog Toto. In fact, the sign post up ahead reads, "The Twilight Zone" .

I just hope that after he finished briefing the CERN scientist about why he was there and drinking his Mountain Dew that the scientist took notes and will seriously consider what he might have told them, that we don't know anything about. Who knows, but right now, I will hold my laughter until it is proven that this incident was just a joke generated to solicit some laughs on April Fools Day.

Thanks for the posting.

Originally posted by hippomchippo

Originally posted by traditionaldrummer

Originally posted by CanadianDream420
"The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

Right, because limitless power and elimination of poverty should be prevented.

What a crummy publicity stunt.

Yes but with that comes limitless kit-kats, which we should all know inevitably leads to disaster and nuclear winter.

Apparently that's the case. Communists evidently have a hell of a sweet tooth.

At least he had the good sense to prevent people from consuming Mountain Dew.

Eloi Cole, a strangely dressed young man, said that he had travelled back in time to prevent the LHC from destroying the world.

Well this is weird. Why did he even bother to try THAT? I mean, someone must have already succeeded in stopping the LHC from destroying the world if he came from the future.

Another illogical nutcase that didn't think his little lie all the way through.

It dosnt say anything about the Unicorn he flew in on!
What happend to the unicorn?

Anyway, if the world was destroyed, how can he come from the future.... Urgh.

Cole? That's the name of Bruce Willis in 12 Monkeys isn't it, where he time travels back in time etc...

reply to post by MaxBlack




It's an April fools day prank...

Originally posted by CanadianDream420

"Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."


[edit on 1/4/2010 by Mirthful Me]

Here you go -- chocolate hellhole from a country that does not exist:

www.youtube.com...

Ah! The man must have a Mr.Fusion energy device in the car/time machine!

Great scott!

Originally posted by Horselover Fat
Oh man....enough with this crap already!

Yep so boring. It amazes me that the people who do these things think its interesting and funny, while i see it as so boring.

What a crummy publicity stunt.

Wow, total sense of humor failure for some people on this thread? Relax, enjoy the silliness that always happens on April first. How can you not know that the intertubes kinda have a field day with this date?

I actually think it was kind of amusing and a neat little Dr. Who gag to boot. See? Physicists are human too, who'da thunk it?

As hilarious as this is, and it is funny. Did it actually happen?
Are there any other sources?

It goes in my sig anyway.

[edit on 3-4-2010 by pazcat]