Just For Gits and Shiggles

Hello all! This is just for fun as I seem to find the most ridiculous statements on instructions, products etc. as I'm sure you have as well, so please share some of your findings.

I have somewhat of an obsession for reading instructions, warnings etc. on products just to see what stupidity I can find.

I recently purchased an orbital buffer from Walmart in order to make waxing the cars a bit easier. It is a nice little hand held job that came in a box approximately nine inches by eight inches. The cord, approximately nine inches long. While perusing the instructions I came across this statement: "If you use an extension cord.........."
WHAT? "If?" How else would you wax a car with a buffer that only has a nine inch cord???

Also, on the lid of my plastic garbage bin it states, "No Hot Ashes." REALLY?? Now, it doesn't bother me that it is there, rather that they HAD to put it there!

Don't shower while blow drying your hair? Don't ingest this detergent cleaner.
Dont drop this product if you want it to function properly.


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I love how deodorant sticks say 'for external use only' on the back.

Or on a bottle of NyQuil: 'warning: may cause drowsiness.' -__-

This is not a direction on a package but a really stupid statement on a Postal Service(Government) television commercial about one price bulk package mailing.

If it fits in the box you can ship it.

One person was complaining about standing in line to have his package weighed.

The actor portraying a postal worker says,"If it weighs less than 70lbs and fits in the box you can ship it for one price you don't have to have it weighed."

So how would you know it weighs less than without weighing it?