posted on Aug, 14 2009 @ 08:07 AM
I have had sleep paralysis since the age of 14. I am now 20 and i get it at least 3-5 times a year. The worst was when i had it every night for a
whole week.
I can say, that when I do have sleep paralysis. I feel a sense of dread. Almost as if something malicious is in the room. However, i dont personally
believe in ghosts / demons and so on and so forth. However, I do believe, that IF they were to exist, they could not harm me.
Anyways, long story short. I used to always have a bad dream before I had a case of SP. Nowdays, its wierd. Its almost as if i am dreaming but my
brain becomes concious and I start controlling my dreams, lucid dreaming its called I believe. Now, SP happens when I become concious of myself being
awake whilst dreaming. Its really wierd to explain.
When dreaming, its almost like i am taking part in watching a movie. I myself am part of that movie, just like paint makes up a painting. I am not
concious of myself, I am only in a state of dreaming, my dream is my existence. Then, as if my brain has begun awakening, I 'remember' I am Bradley
and this is a dream, thats when I start to have fun, controlling my dreams. That however, is a rare occasion. Usually, as soon as I 'remember' I am
bradley, this is a dream, its almost like when you take the plug out of a filled sink. My dreams are sucked away and i awaken to look at my ceiling,
able to move my eyes, but nothing else.
When I am lying there, awake but paralysed, i get a bad feeling. One that can only be described by the following: you know as a child, or even now,
when you done something wrong, which you knew was wrong and 'bad' consequeces came about because of it, i and many others who i spoke to got a
'tingling' sensation at the back of our head/brain, you fear the worst and worry at the same time. It is that feeling + the idea that there is
something in my room, something that is making me scared like this, that does not like me but i cannot see it. As ive said before, a sense of
dread.
I typically struggle against this paralysis, my breathing becomes irregular, my eyes start flittering from left, right, up down, and so on. Until i
make a tiny little noise, and by tiny i really do mean tiny, but to me, i was actually trying to shout/scream. As soon as I make that little noise, i
gradually feel the effects of the paralysis wear off and i become more in controll.
However, if i try to fall back to sleep straight away, its almost like i feel the sleep paralysis is going to happen again, and it has. So now i take
a few deep breaths, think about something that requires my brain to fully engage, just lay awake for a few minutes then drift back off to sleep.
Scientists say this is due to a malfunction of REM sleep, where your body does paralyse itself to stop it from acting out your dreams, but as soon as
your body does that and you go into REM you wake up. Whats wierd is then, that it happens to me after beening asleep anywhere from 20-30 minutes or 5
hours in!
However, I think they are right, it is just a bodily malfunction.
Cheers,
Brad
[edit on 14-8-2009 by Toughiv]