A love letter to the government, page 1

Hi Government,
You know who I am, you know everything about me, after all what with stalking me and my every move. I thought It was so sweet of you too, especially the way you tapped my phone when I was talking about seeing other government's. No one makes me feel safe and secure like you do, I just love the exhilarating feeling of constantly wondering whether your gonna snap and put me in a cage for disagreeing with you about dinner. It drives me wild your my own personal controlling lover. I don't understand why people say they see you trying to keep me under lock and key and ignore that me and you are the greatest, why else would our song be the star spangled banner... *SIGH* sometimes I wonder what life would be like without you, Id probably have to make actual choices, gosh I don't know what I'd do with that kind of freedom, I'd probably go crazy or something, I might even start thinking about the world's problem's like the looming economic collapse, or the emphasis everyone is putting on the swine flu that's still killed less than 300 people worldwide... But you know what Govie Ill listen to everything you tell me because after all it would be to hard and scary to stand up to you and do what need's to be done like me completely dumping you out with the old garbage and just being me for a while... well I hope you realize that every day that goes by just makes it harder and harder for me to get away from your awesome totalitarian touch.

With Lot's of LOVE, The American Citizen