posted on Jul, 9 2009 @ 05:31 AM
In my opinion I see the describer, Indigo as pertaining to a markable mutation occuring in the population these days, that is, in some ways the
beginning of mans pinnacle in time, these forms of mutation and mutational combinations are the progression of the mutants of the past.
I am a very wierd individual, both gifted with special abilities and also cursed with disorder. I am more mutated than most, and can rattle off some
of the base abilities I have. First I have insomnia, I find it impossible to establish any sleep patern. I can stay up for at least three days and be
coherent enough to do homework even after being up for a day or two.
I am bipolar, and also hyperactive. Bipolar is mostly known for its disorderly attributes, but I have special powers of focus and intuition,
especially emotional focus. Being hyperactive my mind resets its train of thought very rapidly and my focus gets sidetracked just enough to bring my
attension to parallel trains of thought which enables me to find unseen answers quickly.
I can multitask very easily and find life easier when doing several things intermingled. Unlike most Indigo (mutant) people I have several mutational
attributes that are comorbidly tied together, so my mutation is far greater and my disability very great indeed. In fact I have to use more of my
brain capacity just to be alive and cope. It really is that bad, sometimes I absolutely hate it and wish for nothing more than to be normal, but that
is not the way it is, I can never be normal.
I have far greater mutations that I don't feel like discussing right now, because I don't want to argue about it, as they are absolutely very hard
to believe. I don't really expect to be believed, but my color is actually not indigo, but hazzard orange. I would readily call myself a Monster
plain and simple. It takes an incredible ammount of energy from the God, just to make myself move at all. In all actuality I cannot motivate or
function at all, without God and medicine.
My members all demand their places and to be heard and when I agree with them I allow them to manifest their places in my personality, this literally
makes me feel like a different person day to day, but I am not at all schizophrenic. My members do not cause me to become delusional by manifesting
hallucinations or fighting with each other. They must follow my bottom line or they end up in chains. This protects me from allowing brain damage to
occur from evil manifestations, at the source, therefore, I do not halucinate at all, where halucination is a sign of brain damage.
You see these disabilities/abilities all exact damage to the brain in different ways. The gifts come when survival means using more of the brain
capacity to curb the disabling effects. Without this enlargement these conditions are fatal, plain and simple. Example, when I do not get an
antipsychotic, such as geodone, I eventually become so depressed with the feeling of exploding and inploding at the same time, that I find myself
literally frozen, because I can't reach the controls. It would be like being cast into a bottomless pit that is so wide that one cannot reach the
sides, that is why I become frozen and cannot even move my lips to speak, let alone get up out of bed, because I can't reach the saving controls on
the inside of my mind.
Being hyperactive is always my savior when I'm not medicated, because when I become focused on depression, it always gets interrupted by my
hyperactivity resetting my mind, eventually I get so sidetracked that I forget why I was depressed. In the most severe depression I have endured,
focus on depression could not have been broken except God sent a little sparrow who landed on my car door while I was sitting in the car, this sparrow
was very amusing as he was struggling to grip the slick surface, and that was cute, but then, he began to sing to me beautifully, which made a tear of
sad joy streak down my face.
I am mutation period.