posted on Jun, 12 2009 @ 11:10 PM
Murdoch Matinee
(customer): Two Tickets for 'Mayhem at Melvins'
(Automated Ticketbooth): "Movies Already Started"
(customer): No problem, I'm sure we can piece it together
(Automated Ticketbooth): Alrighty, that'll be $24.98...Please feed all tickets into Entrance Gate #2
(Ticketmaster): Thank You for supporting Rhegal Cinemas concessions are that way ->
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(customer): I'll have a medium popco....
(vendor): Sir, No large bags are allowed in the theater..
(customer): It's just my popcorn bowl, .....see
(vendor): Whoa! Awesome,... Where'd you get it?
(customer): ..uh.. a close friend gave it to me
(vendor): Well.. I know how that is.. here's your order
(customer): Could You?...
(vendor): Yes,.. let me get the door for you.... enjoy the show.
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MOVIE:
"......No..... I haven't seen him in a while,..... the shutters are probably the only things that move in that house."
"The Shutters?"
"Yeah, they're opened during the morning and come down around noon.... No lights are ever on though and...."
"and what?"
".....and there's... there's a..... Come Inside, I need to tell you something...... Listen Richard there's a lot of folks going into that house
and not coming back out.....
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(customer): (laughing gleefully)
(Moviegoer 1): shhhhh, Hey Goofball I didn't dole out Twelve bucks for a comedy... be quiet up there....
(kid): ..Mister COOL Bowl!!!
(Moviegoer 1): ....shhhhh, shhhh..
(Moviegoer 2): BI #cH.... Don't you SHUSH my son, We paid to get in here like everyone else
(Moviegoer 1): "Go to Hel...."
(Moviegoer 2): What'd you say?....That's what I thought.
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MOVIE:
"what?"
"they're going in but not coming out... they give the door a knock, go inside and that's the last I see of them."
"Mam I don't think that...."
"Look, You don't have to believe me... it wouldn't be the first time my words were Ignored. PEOPLE ARE NOT COMING OUT OF THAT HOUSE!!!"
"thank you Ms. Taylor you've been a big help"........
Al: Hey Rich, What did she say?
Rich: The crazy old bat is spouting off ludicrous accusations, erroneous assumptions, and biased statements... Against a Decent Man!...
Al: all that huh?...
Rich: Yeah
Al: well, We didn't check the back door.. maybe he's in the basement,.... come on,... let's have another look over there...
Rich: but What if she's right Al?
Al: bro! you said yourself that she's nuts... besides if anything's wrong with him we can take him on... so?....
Rich: all right, All right.... you do the knocking and I'll do the talking
Al: Goodshot.....
Rich: Helloooo... anyone home...
Al: .. he's home, I hear the water running,.... Hey Melvin... it's Al and Rich,..... we need you to take a look at the transmission.... the Chevy's
in the driveway..... I can leave it overnight if that's ok with you...mel..
Rich: PHEW
Al: .. man,.. What are you over there doing?
Rich: bro..... bro, take a look through this fake window... Who the hell Mel thinks he is Predator?.....dammmn dog... they're stacked all the way up
to the roof....
Al: they?.... ey Rich, get your head out of that hole
Rich: blehk, pbbbt, pbbbt, it smells too, flies are everywhere
Al: Rich Get Your Head Out of the Hole, The Shutters are coming down... We need to GO!
Rich: I can't move back... help me out Al
Al: I'm not playing man the shutters are coming down
Rich: I said I can't MOVE!... dammit Al help me OUT!....
Al: Quick!, Rich move your Arm to the righhh.... Mel.....MEL, is that yoUGug gg.....
Rich: What the 'F'?... Al!, ALLEN is that a CHAINSAW MOTOR?!!!?...
Al: .....ggggurgle.....
Rich: AL!, MAN.. PULL ME OUT BRO' I CAN'T BREEEEGGGGgggurgle
Melvin: mwahahahahahahBWAHAHAHAHAHAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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(woman 1): ....creepy movie.... that's exactly why I don't date mechanics... You never know what they're capable of inventing..
(woman 2): I hear ya, The Mystery Channel has followed this tragedy for 17 years,... apparently he's responsible for several murders... Over 700
skulls were found in Mel's interior walls alone... I've heard that, .. all the Craniums were removed....
(woman 1): ....gross... I wonder what he did with them...
(Ticketmaster): Enjoyed the Show sir?
(customer): Yes, quite intriguing
(vendor): Drive Safely...
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" I know that but it won't start....."
"Well, What's wrong with it Steven?... Cars just don't die out in drive"
"How the HELL! should I know, Do I look like an Auto Zone?"....
"I'm so frustrated with you right now, I can't think Straight..."
"Whoa! Terry baby what are you doing?"
"I'm flagging down a vehicle, I refuse to ride in your Mom's dog hair infested Buick"
"here we go..."
"......whatever,..idiot,.... HEY... HEY!!!!('whistles loudly')...... OH Thank You so much for Stopping.."
"anytime... Where you headed?"
"We're headed to the LaQuinta Inn,. in Augusta, Georgia... we have to be there by 2am or they'll cancel our Masters Reservation"
"Hop in... and tell the slim fella in the Jetta to Come On"
"Man you're a lifesaver,... wait here, I have to get my things... Steve hurry, let's go...."
Steven:,.... What is this?.... Elephant Ivory?..... Rhino Horn?.... Honey look at this, ..you open the jaw and Popcorn comes out, ..mmmmm it's
Delicious!!,... Fantastic Craftsmanship!!!.... This Bowl Must have cost you a Fortune Mister....., mister uh.....
The names Melvin,... Melvin Murdoch