Please help me find myself

This may sound weird to some of you.

Recently I've been engaged in several discussions on these forums as well as u2u's with several people all relating to spirituality.

I am past the point of questions, I've accepted the fact that I indeed know nothing. I search for truth and pray for wisdom, every night. I guess I'm trying to find myself, myself not only in me but in others and everything around me. I know it's all connected but I guess I'm just not looking in the right places.

I try to look within, maybe I've found what I'm looking for and have just overlooked it. Maybe the truth it staring me in the face and I can't see it.

I'm unsure of how to write where I need help. Or specifically what I need help on. I'm sorry that a lot might find this call for help just downright confusing. I just don't know what say or what to ask for.

I just have such an overwhelming desire to understand life, myself and the purpose of things. I believe everything is connected and that we are divine. I assure you I am perfectly sane. Please feel free to u2u me. I guess I just don't know how to word this.

You know something, youve really struck a chord with me here, I really know what you feel, seriously, I have the same overpowering urge to understand everything, yet I also have the urge to keep things simple in my life.

I mean Im only 19, I have ambitions in life, I want to be a great artist and animator, make a career out of it you know?, but deep down, when I really look inside myself(cheesy much)I feel that what I really should be doing is accumulating knowledge and using it to help people, I really do have an urge to just.....help people, tell them not to take things so seriously, to try a lucid dream at night, to stop and smell the flowers, to embrace just embrace the experience of life be thankful for every breath, etc.

These are just some thoughts that go through my head when I go to bed, I think its important to have a good understanding of where you are in your life and how you feel and what better time than in bedJust take stock of yourself, very important.


Seriously though my mind is always muddled like this......

However, if I ha one piece of advice it would be this(and Im learning to adhere by it), in life do what you truly feel it is you should be doing, dont overcomplicate things, dont feel like you need to help everyone all the time or know everything, because it will just drive you mad, take things easy, follow your ambitions, do what you know is right and things hopefully will take care of themselves and you, and dont get me wrong, I know it aint all roses, lifes a bitch sometimes, thats a given, but things always seem that little less bleak when you take time to go outside at night, look at the stars, and picture that your problems are all on a tiny spot on a tiny rock floating in an ifinite void of darkness and light.

Lifes one hell of a mad ride, make sure to hold on tight, but always remember................its just a ride)))

reply to post by n1zzzn

I just have such an overwhelming desire to understand life, myself and the purpose of things.

I know it's all connected but I guess I'm just not looking in the right places.

This is a good place to start...as you get to know other members and engage in meaningful (sometimes) debate, you may find that what you are looking for might just find you...

I believe everything is connected and that we are divine. I assure you I am perfectly sane.

Divine and sane in the same sentence...oxymoron?


Keep at it man...

Sure I'll help you find yourself. . !

"You're over there."

After being bombarded daily by the media, internet, and others self-rightious views, finding ones self is almost impossible nowadays. Let alone being connected.

Peace and connection is out there, but there is so much external interference to find it.

A walk in the woods, quality time with your dog, or just being alone tuning out everything could.

Interesting thread-----Good Luck on your Quest!!!!!

reply to post by n1zzzn


you know i feel for you ... this is a deep deep question that i don't think words can answer ... you need to find yourself, yourself ... i don't think you'll get the meaning of life out of u2u's or even on this website ... you just need to get out and experience life whether it be by yourself or with friends ... go to a park and just sit in the middle of the woods, relax and you'll start getting some grasp of everything ... or just talk with people who know you better then we do ... these are both 50/50 i guess ... i don't know but here are some links that might give you some better insight on the subject ....

Article 1
Article 2
Article 3

Just trying to help ... good luck on your spiritual journey

You may find this thread a very good read with lots of information, go all the way through.

Enlightenment What is it and when do we know we have reached it?

Also I cannot stress enough Alan Watts to uncomplicate and complicate more again lots for you look here for a start, you really i am sure will find it very helpful to listen to as much of his work as possible, compare it to your own life and listen again.

MUCH wisdom lies in his thoughts, genius and words the best place to start is here:



Enjoy, lay down relax listen to all of this lecture all the parts and contemplate I am sure you will find more peace of mind.

Kind regards,

Elf.

You should start by reading books of high quality and integrity, and find
websites with high quality material as well. That is the best way to start
for anyone willing to get on a spiritual path. I will do my best giving you
a list of good books and websites.

Michael Newton:
* Journey of Souls
* Destiny of Souls

Mary Summer Rain:
* Spirit Song
* Dreamwalker
* Phnoenix Rising
* Phantoms Afoot
* Earthway
* Daybreak

And if you can speak German or dutch:

Ute Kretzschmar:
* 2012 - Der Aufstieg der Erde in die fünfte Dimension
* Ohne Ticket in andere Dimensionen
* Die Seele in den Meisterjahren

Websites:
* spiritrus.com...
* www.near-death.com...
* www.eclecticenergies.com...
* intunewithspirit.com...
* book-of-thoth.com...
* www.spiritualforums.com...

I recommend buying Michael Newton's books right away. They will change
your life forever, they will open your mind to a whole new world, they
provide a huge amount of incredibly important information about the
afterlife, about why we live on earth, what our tasks are and so forth.

Remember, you don't need anyone to get started, you can do it all by
yourself. It's nice to have a person guiding you of course, but most of
us are students ourselves. The spiritual master I know, has done most
of it all by himself as well, and he's turned out extremely powerful and
wise.

Never lose hope, but remember you have to work on it yourself, and
you have to be patient when it comes to training psychic abilities.

I wish you good luck my friend.

In love and light,

Hans

[edit on (23/2/09) by Wehali]

Courageous post. May I suggest taking an interest in such questions as where you are in the creation? What is the organization of the creation? Who is the creator? Where is the creator? Where are you located in the scope of the creation. What is your true spiritual destiny? How can you know and love the creator? What is the true means by which you can reach your point of origin, your true home?

When you beg of the Supreme Being for the Supreme Being himself, in all sincerity and humility, I absolutely guarantee you the Supreme Being will beat a path to your door. But if you want a happy world or to be rich or to be satiated with indulgence in the body or mind or to be worshiped by the world those desires would point you in different direction. Philosophy or intellectualism can't help. You can't fake sincerity but if or when the time is right, believe me, the true Supreme Being is not only ready to provide you with all necessary assistance but much more eager for your return home than you are and way ahead of you on that task. :->

There are some good recommendations here. Though most of it pertains to what someone else has found. I've discovered personally that such journeys are always personal. What other people find is only going to be a clue about what you might find.

As an alternative, sit naked in a dark room and touch each of the parts of your body individually, getting to know them intimately without the prejudice of sight. Sound silly? Maybe it is. If that's the case, maybe you'd better not.

I feel the exact same way.

I can't describe how overwhelming that feeling is to me too.

It's like, I NEED to know who I am, and why I am, I'm only 19, and I hopefully have a lot more time to figure this all out, but, 1 month ago, I couldn't care less about it, and now, Boom, all of a sudden I just HAVE to know.

Unfortunately, no one but ourselves can help us find ourselves, It's going to take time, I've accepted that, but, this overwhelming need of trying to find one's self is actually almost painful...

I suppose in time, it will all just reveal itself.

I'm not going to preach to you. I'm not going to tell you my belief is better than yours. I'm not trying to further any agenda other than pure love.

That being said, any faith/religion when twisted by mankind's own desire to further their own agenda can turn one off to the truth.

I will tell you this, the following is how I was raised and I have been blessed to have seen, and greatly benefited by the intervention of the God called "The Heavenly Father" as mentioned in the New Testament.

This intervention was witnessed by another sane person. It was not only instantaneous, but a direct answer given immediately after prayer for the
"Heavenly Father" to send Angels like He did for His prophet Elisha to chase away the fallen Angels that were oppressing me.

The oppression was when I was very young and innocent, I was about 7 years old. Why were the fallen Angels oppressing me? Because it is war between the "fallen" and the "holy" Angels.

Any soul that might lead a great number to find the truth WILL BE ATTACKED!

However, there is good news, because the oppression has never returned and God has kept them at bay.

Praise be unto God who dwells in Heaven, and to His Son Jesus Christ, without which there is no salvation.

Why? Because when God tested Adam, he/we did the same thing that Lucifer had done, we fell for the same thing that tempted Lucifer...We were told by him that we would be like Gods...knowing the difference between good and evil.

There is a choice you will have to make. Will you follow the Creator Jesus Christ/God/Holy Spirit...or will you try to rebel like Lucifer.

If you rebel, you will be lost for all eternity, sequestered in a place of horrible torment because of your unbelief in the God who can save you.

If you want to call that preaching then so be it. I call it caring about your eternal soul, and thus you.

The following short movie explains how you can be saved. I would not take the time to answer you and tell you the good news if I didn't care for you.
The problem with most "learned" people is that they can't let go of the finite to embrace the infinite. Of course many have never seen the mind blowing kind of intervention that I have.

Try to look past the physical and embrace the spiritual. The following short avi movie tells you how to know you will be saved after this short life.

I hope God will talk to your heart and you will find the answer as I have Nizzan.

Steps To Peace With God

I will just add here as I think the OP needs this balance.

When I had my NDE in late 2004.... lol and have died 2 times already, and remembered part of this, i have mentioned it on ATS before search my name and Post NDE....

God is not the Christian God, the Muslim One, the Buddhist one (though that is my prefered route) or any other one.

He was the essence of all those core teachings, he was not even a He

God is Love and you judge yourself when you die based on the perspective of the effects of your thoughts words and deeds from other peoples point of veiw, make someone smile, you will experience that as them when you have your life review as if you were them, inside them!

Make someone cry, upset etc... well you get the drift,

God is love and forgiveness, but your own conscounse judges yourself when you pass away and draws you towards this pure love or away from it according to your reveiw as above.

So in summation, whichever path you find the most beneficial to you to develop, love and compassion and a sense of connectedness with all as one as it is, thats OK, no one is going to burn you in any pits of hell, unless yourself Always think how it feels from the other persons point of veiw, because one day YOU WILL and judge yourself based on that.

Islam, Christian, jew, Budhist, Shaman, Atheist all are equal and measured on their hearts only, and motivation of love and not selfishness.

Kind Regards,

Elf.

I do sincerely yearn, not for power or possession.

I wonder as I ask for these things if all the small things I come across, maybe even this thread are a result of my pleas.

In response to a few posts above, I do fear evil to an extent but I have sincere faith that the Creator will protect me from such if I call out for it.

[edit on 23-2-2009 by n1zzzn]

Er... when I need to find things I always look in the kitchen first. I've often put something down while I was making a cup of tea. After that, the bathroom - you take a whizz, you put something down... and it's gone for the day.

And of course you're always directly above the centre of the earth.

On a serious note: you're young, enjoy it. I didn't find out what I really wanted to do until I was in my early thirties. And then I went and did it and now I'm looking for something else to do.

I would suggest that if there's something you want to do, do that and get really good at it.

With me it was music. The great thing about music in particular is that it brings you up against all sorts of issues within yourself. Do I have the discipline to practise? Am I expressing something when I play? Do I understand the rules of the idiom I want to play within? Am I physically doing the right thing for my body? Am I relaxed?

John Coltrane said, "after a while, all you can do is try to make yourself a better person".

If I were you, I'd also be wary of attaching myself to dogmatic groups. It starts to come down to "my imaginary friend is better than your imaginary friend". "Yeah? Well my imaginary friend is real, and I'll kill anyone who says different!"

Last tip: watch lots of late-period George Carlin. There is both wit and wisdom in what he says.

Originally posted by n1zzzn
I wonder as I ask for these things if all the small things I come across, maybe even this thread are a result of my pleas.

Bingo!

It's the difference between discovery and the intention of discovery. The difference between awareness and anticipation. Try to guess what form your answers should come in and they'll likely be passing you by while you fret.

[edit on 23-2-2009 by TravelerintheDark]

you will truly find ALL you seek........by setting up a daily meditation practice.

Go inside yourself where all you need is waiting to be found.

:READING MATERIAL:
(my personal TOP 5 'enlightenment' tomes, and really they are all you would ever need...I read these books over & over & over....)

The Four Agreements...by Miguel Ruiz

And Eckhardt Tolle's....The Power of Now....AND 'A New Earth'

The Carlos Castaneda books.....

the Conversations with God.......books

Robert Monroe's FAR JOURNEYS


Let your mind soak up these books.....and practice meditation.
IMO thats all you need for enlightenment.

Purchase a journal. Six hundred pages of blank paper. Title it "All the Answers " On the last page write " The End " Place it on your book shelf. From time to time carefully remove this journal. At random, select any one of the six hundred blank pages. Stare intently at said blank page. Close the journal and return it to its sacred resting place.
In my most humble opinion, this is as close as you will ever come !

Just make every effort to be honest with yourself. There is tons of stuff on the internet and I recommend checking out whatever interests you. Always keep the idea of grounding in mind. Alan Watts has the best explanation for oneness and "What we really are" that I've ever come across. So I must second the recommendation made by MischeviousElf. It was an insightful suggestion, as you asked for help specifically on finding yourself. I really like the Alan Watts video "A conversation with myself" on youtube.

reply to post by MischeviousElf


Interesting idea on us judging ourselves after death, but I'm wondering how does this work? The way I see it, short of flat out abuse, most suffering is yes in response to anothers actions, but it is really brought on by ourselves. So it's very hard to cause another person pain when they are really bringing it all on themselves. On top of that, all suffering is possible only through the ego which isn't our self at all. How do we judge ourselves!? Rather tricky to me I look forward to your response.

I'm sure you see what I mean but to further illustrate for everyone: A guy asks a girl out, she say's no. The girl is stressed out having to deal with an uneasy situation, the guy is depressed for weeks cause the girl said no. Did the girl cause the guy pain? Did the guy cause the girl pain? No they both brought it on themselves by letting it bother them so and focusing on it.