Are there any "good" girls out there anymore?

Originally posted by goldbomb444
I'm not sure you read the rest of the thread. I am looking for the girls that are intelligent. Perhaps a girl that is that shy is that way because she gets made fun of for being smart? I know how that feels...

I read it bro, I guess I'm trying to impart my experiences in the last 3 years into a few paragraphs lol.

I hear you, believe me, you remind me of myself on my first day.

What I'm trying to say is that this girl you describe is more mythical than anything. I've dated a lot of doctors/pharmacists/psychologists to be, smart women, on paper. It never seems to translate into social situations, sure they know what's going on but that doesn't mean they'll acknowledge your appreciation for their intelligence in exchange for lacking in whatever field you're trying to avoid being confronted on.

All in all my advice is as previous, don't look for a specific girl, you end up trying to find her within each and every girl. Have the mentality that she'll come to you via trial and error; expecting a lot of error.

reply to post by ZombieOctopus


The "shy girl" is just an example, what I'm trying to tell him is that maybe he should lower his standards a little if he wants to meet someone with the right qualities. Everyone wants the extremely attractive guy/girl with the great personality who just happens to be loyal and a good person. Doesn't always turn out that way. Sometimes the right person is the person you least suspect.

I have no problem with an "average" looking girl. None at all. An average looking girl with no brains is just as bad a a great looking one with no brains

reply to post by goldbomb444


Well....... I don't know maybe you need to move to a huge city where there's all types of people. Where do you live?

Originally posted by goldbomb444
I have no problem with an "average" looking girl. None at all. An average looking girl with no brains is just as bad a a great looking one with no brains

I will respectfully disagree with you sir but acknowledge your position Good luck with it.

Originally posted by veranda
reply to post by goldbomb444

 

Well....... I don't know maybe you need to move to a huge city where there's all types of people. Where do you live?

Lol, I live in Tempe, AZ...can't get too much bigger than that

ok then my only advice is to go out and meet as many people as you can, and drink heavily. Then you won't care so much about meeting the right girl, and then all of a sudden you will meet the right girl! That's what I did and it worked for me : )

Lol...being 18 it is hard to drink out in public...

reply to post by goldbomb444


you always manage to defeat me don't you? lol then get into drugs. Nothing hard core, weed and the occasional shrooms will do. I'm just kidding .... or am I?

Originally posted by veranda
reply to post by goldbomb444

 

you always manage to defeat me don't you? lol then get into drugs. Nothing hard core, weed and the occasional shrooms will do. I'm just kidding .... or am I?

Lol...your killing me here. I am looking for girls that are smart enough not to do crap like that. I would be quite hypocritical if I did them wouldn't I?

Well I suppose but maybe you need to take your mind off the girl hunt... just relax and meet people. I know because when I was in high school I was all nerdy and shy and hurt because I felt like no guy was interested in me.... and then I started partying and got to know guys better as friends and it just kind of clicked.... and then I met the guy I'm with now. And if your not afraid to get with someone who is average I don't see any reason why you shouldn't the find the right girl. You seem like a real sweetheart- I hope you find her !!!

Originally posted by goldbomb444

Originally posted by veranda
reply to post by goldbomb444

 

you always manage to defeat me don't you? lol then get into drugs. Nothing hard core, weed and the occasional shrooms will do. I'm just kidding .... or am I?

Lol...your killing me here. I am looking for girls that are smart enough not to do crap like that. I would be quite hypocritical if I did them wouldn't I?

Come on man, I'm having doubts as to your commitment here.

I second veranda. Bring a couple friends to a bar near campus, drink till you can't feel feelings and pick yourself out one to be proud of. Then ride that confidence to something better, no pun intended.

[edit on 10/31/2008 by ZombieOctopus]

Shy people are really misunderstood, even surprisingly by doctors. They get treated as though theres something wrong with them, and actually some of them end up bent out of shape because of it, and only start to truly appreciate who they are and accept their differences in their 30s. Its hard being an innie in an outie world. But to the psychologists studying personalities, there are quite a bit differences in introspective people who are born that way. Just over 25% are born innies, because the world doesn't need any more than that. They are considered by those studying personalities to be the master planners of the world. Whereas the chemical released for outies in social situations is the feeling good natural opiums in the brain, these cause a fight or flight response in the introvert. The thought processes go through different areas of the brain as well. The introspects are associated with chemicals related to memories and their thought processes involve retrieving memories and making comparisons when hearing information. When they're being quiet, they're absorbing everything and problem solving it. When they go out in a crowd, they don't feel good about it, and often have to plan ahead time, and then spend a few days recovering and building up their strength so they don't get ill afterwards. Once they are in their 30s, they usually understand themselves a lot better, and have some very good friends who appreciate them, as they do their more outgoing companions who lift them up.
Theres lots of pretty, shy girls out there. I would say get to know one, but be friends for a while first.

[edit on 31-10-2008 by mystiq]

reply to post by goldbomb444


I am a genius and I do stuff like that often

Originally posted by mystiq
When they go out in a crowd, they don't feel good about it, and often have to plan ahead time, and then spend a few days recovering and building up their strength so they don't get ill afterwards. Once they are in their 30s, they usually understand themselves a lot better, and have some very good friends who appreciate them, as they do their more outgoing companions who lift them up.

[edit on 31-10-2008 by mystiq]

A bit off topic for a moment but I guess you just explained to me why I have trouble in crowds. I often have to plan out exactly what I will say if spoken to someone at a large social event. Wow, I thought I was just weird or something.

Yeah, me too! I was always surrounded by more outgoing friends so we were sort of foils for each other. So in some ways it was easier for me. I have to rest up ahead of time, and after wards for things that make me feel really depleted afterwards. Just need some quiet reflective time to refill myself so to speak.

Wow, you have no idea how good it makes me feel to know that I am not the only one that feels like this. I watch people that can talk to everyone at a party and just keep talking, while I am much more content to just talk to 1-3 people.

Okay, that was fun...not. I went to the local coffee shop, got a coffee, and started reading a book. After a little while had passed, a girl walked in that caught my eye. She too got a coffee, and then sat down at a table next to me. Thats when I realized that I had no clue what to say to a random girl you have never seen before (like I said earlier, I grew up in a very small town where everyone knows everyone else). I hoped she would be reading a book by the same author or something I could use to start conversation, but no luck. She was reading some book by an author I've never heard of, and I couldn't pick out anything else to start a conversation with...
How do you start talking to a total stranger in this situation?

Quit being a wuss. Be yourself and quit cry-babying about the "are there any good girls out there?" crap.

When you stop looking and lamenting, one will come along from where you don't expect. But, she'll probably weigh 700lbs and have a moustache.

Ok, kidding about the moustache thing. And, I suppose the 700lb thing too. They are out there, but they don't like shy whiners. When you get older and live your own life, you'll meet them. But, right now, you are probably just being too nice. Quit it. Go get a tattoo. Maybe pierce a body part. Grow your hair out. After that go have some and quit

By the time you do this, that 700lb woman will quit eating so much

and, 550lbs later, she'll be and at your feet!

Originally posted by CreeWolf
Quit being a wuss. Be yourself and quit cry-babying about the "are there any good girls out there?" crap.

When you stop looking and lamenting, one will come along from where you don't expect. But, she'll probably weigh 700lbs and have a moustache.

Ok, kidding about the moustache thing. And, I suppose the 700lb thing too. They are out there, but they don't like shy whiners. When you get older and live your own life, you'll meet them. But, right now, you are probably just being too nice. Quit it. Go get a tattoo. Maybe pierce a body part. Grow your hair out. After that go have some and quit

By the time you do this, that 700lb woman will quit eating so much

and, 550lbs later, she'll be

and

at your feet!

I will take most of that as a joke (not a very funny one but whatever). I am not sure how one can be "too nice". I am simply being myself. Can't help that (unless I want to pretend to be someone I am not, in which case I don't want the girls I would attract anyway).

Oh and by the way, I do have a tattoo.