reply to post by jam321
I didn't mean to come off snarky. Been up all night with a teething toddler.*smiles*
But I will say what a lot of people think but are afraid to say because they don't want to tread through these murkey waters.
First off, I am a feminist, but not solidly so for lack of a better word.
I believe women should be given the same pay, same education, same opportunities. I believe it should be even across the board, if they so choose.
I am going to try to say this without jumbling things up too much.
But I am sure someone is going to get annoyed.
I will start by saying that there is a double standard. Would this be a problem if it this was a father? No.
I do believe in the NATURAL order of things, women tend to do the child rearing. This is where it gets murkey.
It is the way nature has always designed it. Women nurture, men tend to be the protectors and the bread winners.
Is either one better the the other? No, both need to happen for things to work.
Can men be a stay at home parent? Absolutely. But I believe at least one biological parent should stay home if possible.
It is unclear but I think this is the case in Palin's family.
I can't stress enough that though the father's tend to go do the work, this does not in any way belittle the contribution to the family unit. In
fact, the effects of not having a father around are profound. They provide safety, roughhousing, solidarity, and are a contant member of the family.
The best thing that is happening for families today is that the fathers can still provide, but when they get home they play with the kids and
contribute to their upbringing, playing, homework, sports, cooking, etc. Instead of walking in the door and their job is done. They can be a loving,
caring father without criticism now, And it is a wonderful wonderful thing.
But women still tend to be the nurturers. A father will be more likely to abandon a family unit then a mother. I have seen one absentee mother in my
life, but dozens of men dissappear.
I know of way more single mothers, then single fathers.
And society recongizes this. While it is not fair either way, if a woman was to commit neglect, abuse, or abandonement, she will face far harsher
punishement, ridicule and ostracization then a man would. You can argue what you want, but it is true.
We have all watched the news and are far more aghast at a devient mother then a father.
This is why custody is often awarded more to mothers. That relationship is undestood. Women will face far harsher penalties for their crimes then
their male counterparts for the same exact thing.
So while women tend to get awarded the families, they will face far higher punishment if they disrupt their families then a man would. So it is a
double edged sword.
But I will go out and risk life and limb here and say that generally(there are always exceptions) that women tend to have stronger bonds to their
children then the fathers. Does that mean fathers don't love their children? Absolutely not. But I think a lot of times, that men love their spouses
just as much. That is why so many senior males waste away after losing a long term spouse as oppossed to women. I think it is just nature at work. The
male protects the spouse, the mother protects the children. And the triangle works.
It ensures survival. One parent isn't more important then the other, I think that they are important at different times. Mom makes sure they grow up
big and healthy, dad makes sure they have the tools to survive. I will make sure he eats healthy. Dad will make sure he knows how to change a tire.
Now, down to the dirt. Above and beyond feminism, and women's rights, I believe that when you have children, it stops being about you. Period.
I don't care if it was an accident or you tried for 10 years, you brought this life in the world, you better try your damndest to do right by your
children.
I give up a lot for my son. And I don't regret one iota of it. I would give up more if I had it.
Wanna change the world? Great. But I don't believe you do it at the expense of your own family. I have an opportunity right now to start the business
I have always wanted to start. But I won't. Because starting a business is hard. It is long days. 12-16 hours a day. My young child needs me here and
now.That is time I will never get back.And now amount of success is worth that. A young child doesn't care that his mother is VP or an astronaut or
a doctor. All they know is that they need their mother at a young age. More then money, fame, clothes, children need their parents around, and
constant, and available. It is all about security.
Not only does Palin have all these children, she has one with a disability. That alone is stressful for a family. She has a new baby with a
disability. But being a governor, and now a VP candidate, how much time does she really have for these children?
Can you have it all, sure. There are a lot of female politicians out there, most of them mothers. But their kids are older.
The family isn't staying at home to contend with new family members while mom is out playing politician.
Now, contrary to popular belief. Teen pregnancies don't just happen because of hormones or boredom. Well maybe boredom, because parents are
unvailable. It stems from a broken home, divorce,addiction,negligence, abuse, neglect, or sexual abuse of some kind while young. So something happened
in this young girl's life that her parents didn't take care of.
In no way do I want to apply that being a teen mom is death sentence. Many raise their children successfully. And any young mom who handles the
challenge deserves a great huge round of applause. There is a lot of adversity to face in that arena.
But I will say what a lot of mothers are thinking and feeling, but not willing to say out loud(but behind closed doors, because I have heard this
from many) Palin needs to be staying at home and taking care of her children. Even being VP and not P, has to be a 24/7 job. And you can't take your
family with you everywhere. And I think what she is doing to them isn't fair.Palin seems like a beautiful, healthy, smart woman. She can wait a few
more years to raise her family before changing the world. Then by all means have at it.
These are really hard jobs. A president that serves two terms always ends up looking like hell. You can't tell me that is an environment that is good
for raising children. And with McCain being the age he is(no offense) there is a good chance she could become president. McCain is just in that age
group. I think he looks great, and probably in better shape then most of us. But stuff at that age happens. Look at David letterman. Healthy as an ox,
yet stricken down with a heart attack.
I will say this. I also think that being the children of a politician has to be hard. We all saw the Bush twins rebel. I can't imagine what it is
like being the teen of someone of that caliber. In these cases, it could be a reaction to stress. And the Bush twins turned out fine.