It's The First Date - Let's Do It!

By the title you more than likely think the is a topic of sex on the first date, but it is not. It could be if that is what peeves you about your first dates. It does me!

I want to see what peeves you (makes you mad) about what people do on the first date. I think this topic will be an educational experience for all, beginners and advanced people in life. So many instances you read about what people like and you always get the same repetitious answers. There is in my opinion more original bad things that people do than original good things or places to take a person.

Simply, it will be amusing to read what peeves people or what people have experienced on first dates.

So Let's Do It! I'll start off by listing an example of my first date Pet Peeves!

I had a date that ordered a lot of wine and was chugging it down during the complete meal. Seriously she was on the second bottle before we were done eating. I had only one glass, but who knows how many she had and she was constantly prepping herself with her makeup and compact mirror. She obviously was getting pretty hammered because she couldn't even apply it properly. To top it off she already had make up on. I was getting pretty peeved that she was paying more attention to her makeup pack job than to me so I asked her, "Why are you so interested in all that makeup?"

She replied, "Honey, I what to look good for you for when we do it tonight!"

I couldn't believe how lame and disrespectful this chick was. I said, "Well, If you are so excited about this than we can go ahead and leave now!"

I took her home and gave her the good old boot out the car!

What kind of disloyal person has sex on the first date? So that is one of my pet peeves.

I think the worst thing you can do is talk about your ex, or exes..ALL EVENING!
It's fine to touch base on the subject for a small portion of the conversation, then move on to something else.
Now, I'm going to state this even though I'm female, because I have observed others of my own gender do this, and it DRIVES ME NUTS!
I cannot stand to see a woman talk talk talk like a freakin' chatty Cathy doll, and the poor guy can barely get a nod or uh-huh, in edgewise.
Seriously SHUT THE HECK UP and try listening for a change.
To me, dinner and a movie should be a second date.
A first date should consist of coffee or drinks, depending on what you chose, and just conversation. I think both people should know from that point on if they want to see each other again.

You seem to be very well grounded and intelligent about relationships. I know so many women that would read a dating book about rules and say that the author is clueless when the fact is that they are clueless. Dinner on a first date is always said to be a no no and this is something that I knew, but this chick insisted on it.

I had a friend that I knew for ten years. It wasn't really a first date but, I went to her house to set up something on her computer. All she talked about was her ex and how he wasn't paying the child support he owed. We both were obviously attracted to each other so it was a more than casual meeting. It was the beginning and we both knew it. Unfortunately for her it was the end because I just couldn't handle hearing her say his name like 20 times in a two hour period.

Afterwards I ignored her and she dessparately tried to get my attention back but she blew it. She proved that she is still stuck on him and not moving on with me!

[edit on 24-8-2008 by MrMysticism]

reply to post by AccessDenied


A women after my own heart. I agree to every thing you said.

I would like to add don't answer your cell phone when you are on a date. Unless you are a doctor or potus, it is not that important and you can call them back. I hate to see people out to dinner and one is chatting away on a cell phone.

Who should pay for the food/drinks/whatever?

I went out with this guy a few times and I payed for everything. I consider my self a modern women but when the check came and I reached for my money he did not even stop me. I found this a little annoying since he was the one asking out.

First dates are the most annoying dates. I absolutely despise first dates. It's like a freaking Job interview for crying out loud.

I have to arrange to meet the woman at a restaurant, I pay for the drinks, I pay for the meal, I have to fork over all sorts of money, and for what? I don't know this person. I might not even like this person.

What also gets to me is those women that eat just a salad or something small on a first date. Thats complete BS, I know dang well that the girl is going home after the date to pig out in the fridge, shes doing this to show what a light eater or something she is. IDK. It just screams fake to me.

Next is the shy conversation. Two strangers who don't really know each other trying to make conversation in the most unoffensive and unrealistic manner possible. No real conversation is going on it's all the stuff they puff themselves up with that you latter find out is an absolute lie.

I hate dating, heck I hate it so much I would rather be alone

Bringing up the serious issues like marriage and children. Very inappropriate (not to mention terrifying) on the first date. I guess some people don't want to waste any time.

Originally posted by AshleyD
Bringing up the serious issues like marriage and children. Very inappropriate (not to mention terrifying) on the first date. I guess some people don't want to waste any time.

I have been told I am unfit to date because of my kids.

This is one reason I also no longer date....it is just a waste of my time.

reply to post by fishneedh2o


Ah, sorry. What I said might have been misunderstood. I'm referring to people who ask their first date if they are interested in marriage and kids and then proceed to go on and on how they want to get married and start a family as soon as possible. Not just conversation as to whether or not the person has children or is divorced (an honest question and and understandable thing to want to know).

Sorry to hear about what you were told, though. My cousin was a single mother for a few years and I know hearing such a thing repeatedly upset her a great deal.

reply to post by fishneedh2o


You should look for other single parents to date. That would help. Just because you have children does not mean your undateable it just means that you have children and they have to have priority in your life.

A person that can understand that is the person you should start dating. There are people out there that do understand the responsibilities that children bring and are ok with that.

reply to post by fishneedh2o


Woah! Whoever said that to you does not deserve the time of day from you.
Iam a single mom, and quite fit for a relationship thank you, if I so choose.
The guy just has to be aware that MY KIDS COME FIRST and always will.
Far too many people out there judge what they do not know. Just because you are a mom you are not fit to date?
PFFT.
They can go suck a lemon.
Honey , you do what you want to, and don't give a second thought to what others say.

In response to the question of who should pay..
I prefer to pay my own way. Always. I guess I'm modern that way.Unless it was agreed upon beforehand that the guy does the paying( that means discussed openly, not assumed), then I fully plan to pay for my own meal, movie, or whatever.

[edit on 25-8-2008 by AccessDenied]

Originally posted by whatukno
I have to arrange to meet the woman at a restaurant, I pay for the drinks, I pay for the meal, I have to fork over all sorts of money, and for what? I don't know this person. I might not even like this person.

What also gets to me is those women that eat just a salad or something small on a first date. Thats complete BS, I know dang well that the girl is going home after the date to pig out in the fridge, shes doing this to show what a light eater or something she is. IDK. It just screams fake to me.

Two of my most hated peeves!

Firstly, I never pay for all the food or drinks or whatever. If its drinks we always take turns buying each others and if its food we split whatever it is in half or pay for our own.
Why should I have to fork out OODLES for someone I don't know who may just be looking for a nice, free meal? If we do enter a relationship we will be sharing everything, so why not the first bill? I don't know you, I may not like you, so no... I won't be paying £60 for that three course meal you just picked at.
And if you've paid all night and then end up doing the nasty on a first date, I feel like I've just brought a prostitute with food and know I won't be seeing her again.
Its different if I start dating a friend though. Me and my friends tend to take turns paying for food, so I know with a friend the first treat would be on me, the next on her etc.

And what the hell is with the salad? I like a girl who likes her food, but who also likes to look good. Why do they feel like eating some salad on the first date, and then pigging into an entire cow when your more comfortable is fine? If you want the cow first, just get it... as long as I'm not buying.

Yea a woman that want's to sleep with you on the first date, thats a serious red flag in my book.

Dating isn't fun, it's a chore. It's more like a job interview.

:bnghd:

Originally posted by whatukno
First dates are the most annoying dates. I absolutely despise first dates. It's like a freaking Job interview for crying out loud.

I call them, "The White Knuckle Event!" Grab on for your life 'cause you never know whats gonna happen!

reply to post by AccessDenied


I didn't make you my friend because you're a single mom (In the physical life that does help). I made you my friend 'cause you sound like you have a grip on the realities of dating.

I think it's great that you are prioritizing your kids over a relationship, but just remember like in your professional life it can be overwelming and sooner than you know time has passed you by. Create a happy medium in your life.



[edit on 25-8-2008 by MrMysticism]

I love dating. Especially those first few. I just love meeting new people, woman, to be more specific.

With that said, there are two things that would make that date our last.

20 Questions! Ladies, it's not a job interview. Just go with the conversation. You don't need to know everything about us in the first 30 min. That kinda takes the fun out of it anyway, right?

And the other has to be a girl who can't keep a conversation going. I really don't like having to be the one always talking and then having you answer with a "Yeah, haha, me too. Hehe, You're cute."

That stems into a few others though, like agreeing with everything I say. My god, can you make it any more obvious that your attracted to me? Not fun anymore.

Or how bout, a girl not being herself.

Just be yourself and have fun! If it doesn't work out, it'll be over soon anyway.

-Dev

reply to post by DevolutionEvolvd


When I get the 20 question act read to me, I answer them in a real creepy way and see how fast they make their way to the exit door!


Her: ......and the last date you had was...
Me: Well, uh, I was, hoping that you would hold on to me and help me remember!

Her: .....so you are saying you don't remember?
Me: I'm say it's so long that you should hold on to it!

reply to post by MrMysticism


Haha, priceless!

Yeah, I usually end up just answering the questions completely out of context.

Her: So, what do you do for a living?
Me: I can't tell you......

Her: Why not? Please.......
Me: ok, but you can't tell anybody. (Lean in close to whisper) I'm the Easter Bunny......

reply to post by DevolutionEvolvd


Yeah, I gave the pervy route example. I like your weirdo route example.

That is another pet peeve of mine is asking what you do for a living, because most of the time that is asked to see your financial level.

I hate it the most when I'm doing well in life not when I'm struggling for some reason.

Makeup packing gold diggers who prostitute themselves out for free rent and material items. That's all those type of women are doing. They don't even know what real love is.



[edit on 25-8-2008 by MrMysticism]

I love dating but goodness some times you just want to strangle the fella,

Talking about Ex's, a big no no,

Talking none stop about your self - GAH I want to get to know him not here it all in one night,

first dates are about having fun and getting to know each other a little bit,

DONT- take me to a watch a movie, I want to get to know the fella not the movie lol

Also guzzling loads of beer is not attrative (Even if you do it normaly) I want to see the real person not the drink, have a few then cut it there,

keep all the bad habits at home, let me get to know you first before i learn that you pick your nose or do can to arm farts REALLY i dont need to see this on the first few dates, MAjor put off,

End of the date should be with a simple kiss, Nothing more,

i wanna score with some chicks. but what i dont understand is if chicks groove to my completion. or if i have the wrong impression. are chicks really into it or do they just sit there.

reply to post by asala

keep all the bad habits at home, let me get to know you first before i learn that you pick your nose or do can to arm farts

OMG!!! ROFLMAO!
That would definitely NOT get a second date..
ARM FARTS..Oh gosh.. I'm laughing so hard I'm
I haven't seen a guy do that since grade school.