i'm dating two girls at once

i'm dating two girls at once and they don't know about each other. i've already picked out the one i wanna stay with so at this point i'm just being kind of cold to the other one. we're still very physical with each other but i make fun of her friends, blow off dates with flimsy excuses, stuff like that.

i really want her to get sufficiently fed up to break up with me, that way everybody kind of wins. she gets to feel like she is in control of her own destiny and i don't have to deal with the guilt and hassles and questions that come up after you dump somebody. so far nothing has worked, though. i guess i'm wondering short of admitting that i started cheating on her a month or so ago with the girl i want to stay with (which i won't do) what can i do that won't be too cruel but will get her to be the one to end it?

Dude alot of times if you are mean to the person you don't want to be with... they like you more!

Some people like challenges, and if they cannot have you they keep trying their hardest to get you!

...your on your own...lets hope girl does'nt get stalkish and turn on you!

reply to post by Givenmay



yeah i do worry a little about getting stalked. she's hot but not exactly chockful of sanity. plus she has pictures of things we've done together some of which are a little compromising, to say the least, so i need for her not to be full of vengeance or anything.

I take it you are pretty young?

Remeber Karmna! It can come back on you lol,

Anyway really i think you should treat her with the same respect you would like to be treated with,

Be a man and do the right thing, Believe me if your other GF finds out she may want nothing to do with you either,

Its not just the "other" girl you are dissing, its the one you like too,

Really save all the stress and just let her down,

reply to post by asala

Be a man and do the right thing, Believe me if your other GF finds out she may want nothing to do with you either,

no you're totally right about that. if the first string girlfriend found out about the second string girlfriend she'd want nothing to do with me.

it's just whenever i start trying to get rid of the one i don't really want she gets really clingy. and/or we start fooling around. plus she just gave me a really expensive watch as a gift so i feel guilty over that.

my life would be easier if i could just figure out the thing that would drive her away.

You have to be strong, Im not sure you really like the other girl as much as you say you do, Or you would find it in you to be strong enough to rid the other one,

Be stern, Meet her somewhere public,

Tell her its over, give her back the watch and walk away,

Dont take any calls from her for a while ect ect... You just got to do it, Dont be in any situations with her that you can be lured back to the smootchi stuff,
And dont under estimate her She pretty much im sure already knows, Most girls do, wheather she wants to admit that or not is another thing,

[edit on 3-8-2008 by asala]

where is the problem being honest?

just be a man and talk to her!
then you will be true to yourself and as asala said, treat her with the respect she deserve!

if a guy would treat me bad, so that i would sent him into the dust, he surely would regret treating me like that

and you should try to get an agreement with that girl about the photos! make sure that they will never compromise any of you two

good luck!

Man haven't you seen the Materials Safety Data Sheet on women?

Like everyone has said, just let the girl down. Don't toy with her, don't string her along, just break it off clean and get on with your life, and let her get on with hers.

reply to post by Slothrop

wow... man up and end it stop being an idiot. if you can make the first move and date two women, be man enough to take responsibility and end the relationship you dont wanna be in.

[edit on 3-8-2008 by Question Fate]

reply to post by Slothrop


Dude, the first thing you should've done BEFORE you started dating either of them was to tell them that you are seeing different women right now. This way they will know what to expect from the onset of the "relationship."

Trust me, they will appreciate you for being honest. And I think you will be surprised that many of these women are probably doing the same thing. Or at least want to.

Originally posted by Slothrop

[...]if the first string girlfriend found out about the second string girlfriend she'd want nothing to do with me.

True.

plus she just gave me a really expensive watch as a gift so i feel guilty over that.

If you decide to breakup with this one, give her back the watch and other gifts. That way you won't feel 'THAT' guilty.

my life would be easier if i could just figure out the thing that would drive her away.

Be honest. Tell her you love her as a friend but not 'THAT' much.

Originally posted by Slothrop
i'm dating two girls at once and they don't know about each other. i've already picked out the one i wanna stay with so at this point i'm just being kind of cold to the other one. we're still very physical with each other

So you're still using her for sex..

but i make fun of her friends, blow off dates with flimsy excuses, stuff like that.

yet you justify this cowardly behaviour by saying you are doing her the favour. Remember to tell her that when you confess! If you can't be honest with her at least be honest with yourself.

i really want her to get sufficiently fed up to break up with me, that way everybody kind of wins. she gets to feel like she is in control of her own destiny

Even though you're making a fool out of her and still using her for sex..
Everybody wins? Yep.. your actions are purely due to trying to make her feel in control. What a gentleman you are!

and i don't have to deal with the guilt and hassles and questions that come up after you dump somebody. so far nothing has worked, though.

Honestly did not occur to you? apparently this "guilt" was not bad enough to stop having sex with her..

i guess i'm wondering short of admitting that i started cheating on her a month or so ago with the girl i want to stay with (which i won't do) what can i do that won't be too cruel but will get her to be the one to end it?

That really is a cowards way out.. and it is definently NOT a way out anyway as she's going to be a woman scorned no matter what.

I'm wondering.. does the new girlfriend know you are still having sex with the old one? didn't think so. You questioned your old gf's sanity yet you still keep taking the risk. Ideally they with both find out and dump your arse.. obviously you do not respect either of them.

Give the watch back and as someone else said "Man up".

[edit on 3-8-2008 by riley]

If either of them finds out your so screwed its not funny.
How ever if you do post pictures of the bruises/property damage to discourage anyone on here from being so stupid.

dont end up with no one. that sucks. thats all i think about.

I starred Riley because she said everything I was too cowardly to say. This thread massively pisses me off. Man up and tell her it's over. Quit using her for sex and acting like you're doing her a favor. Ugh. This infuriates me because at one time I was the girlfriend #1. It was horrible and if he had just told me everything would have been relatively cool between us. Don't do that to her. Give the watch back and break it off... immediately.

You mean you don't already feel guilty for treating her the way you are treating her?

What you are doing is absolutly wrong and piggish and if you keep stringing her along by sleeping with her and speaking to her yet being cold with her at the same time, THAT is what entices stalking. She is going to eventually want to know what your problem is and try to fix it and she will start following you and tracking you down in order to find out what is wrong.

Be a man, tell her that you are in love with someone else. Yes she will be hurt but in the long run it will be better for her in the end than what you are doing now.

Originally posted by AshleyD
I starred Riley because she said everything I was too cowardly to say. This thread massively pisses me off. Man up and tell her it's over. Quit using her for sex and acting like you're doing her a favor. Ugh. This infuriates me because at one time I was the girlfriend #1. It was horrible and if he had just told me everything would have been relatively cool between us. Don't do that to her. Give the watch back and break it off... immediately.

Do you think she might have chiggers.

reply to post by Michael Pait


Those little teeny tiny bugs you get while walking in the grass?

Chiggers?

I am almost certain she does. That must be it.

Everyone knows chiggers results in getting cheated on so make sure you use Off! spray when walking in tall grass if you want your significant other to remain faithful.

Originally posted by whatukno
Man haven't you seen the Materials Safety Data Sheet on women?

and where is the data sheet on men?
must be interesting to!!!

Sounds like you forgot to pick up a copy of The Game.

But seriously, it just sounds like you need to grow a pair man. And then, try to learn how women think.

And then, why are you going to stay with one in the first place. If you're young, you don't need a girlfriend. There's nothing wrong with dating around, just let them know that you see other girls too.

-Dev

[edit on 4-8-2008 by DevolutionEvolvd]