Are some people bound to be alone?

Are some people bound to be alone? it seems that i am bound to be alone forever, i am not trying to sound emo or anything but its the truth. the ladies just dont seem interested enough to even talk to me. i mean, im not like a movie star or anything but im not the elephant man either. am i alone in this? i need help before i am overcome by the crushing loneliness! lol =-(

The sick and sad part about it is that when you aren't looking for romance, that is when romance will show up. I think it has to do with some freaked out messed up code women have about dating. They want a guy that is not interested in her. If you are looking like you are actually looking to be with someone, women will avoid you like the plague. If however you act as if your already taken, don't care, or aren't interested. Then for some god knows reason women will actually be interested and persue you.

Don't ask me why, I have given up even trying to figure women out. I would rather beat my head against a brick wall.:bnghd:

reply to post by superevoman


We all go thru slumps man...

But the best thing to do is to get dressed up all presentable, and go to the Grocery Store.

I think you can meet more women at the grocery store then ANYWHERE else...

And since you are a man, you are clueless on pretty much everything haveing to do with shopping, so don't feel shy to ask for help... From that beautiful blonde stareing at the fruit...

Ill tell you this personaly, you never know when love will meet your eyes...

Originally posted by whatukno
The sick and sad part about it is that when you aren't looking for romance, that is when romance will show up. I think it has to do with some freaked out messed up code women have about dating. They want a guy that is not interested in her. If you are looking like you are actually looking to be with someone, women will avoid you like the plague. If however you act as if your already taken, don't care, or aren't interested. Then for some god knows reason women will actually be interested and persue you.

Don't ask me why, I have given up even trying to figure women out. I would rather beat my head against a brick wall.:bnghd:

It absolutely hits like a bolt of lightning when you don't expect it.
And you will both know it.
As for trying to figure us out Wukky, it's the thrill of the chase hon.

reply to post by whatukno


I think this captures the symptoms but not the underlying cause. In my experience women don't like clingy, needy guys. When we say women don't want guys that are interested in them, what that really means I think is that women are attracted to men who they perceive as having a lot going for them. If a man doesn't faun all over a woman right away, she will often think that there must be something to this guy that I need to know about. It also shows the guy has backbone and won't capitulate to everything she says or does.

It took me a while to learn that on dates the best strategy was to be positive, charming, and a little mysterious (meaning don't go over your life history, goals, philosophies, etc. on the first date.) And most importantly, don't give the impression that you will be eternally sad if she doesn't want to see you again.

As for trying to figure us out Wukky, it's the thrill of the chase hon.

Still would rather beat my head against a brick wall :bnghd:

Originally posted by whatukno
Don't ask me why, I have given up even trying to figure women out. I would rather beat my head against a brick wall.:bnghd:

Disappointing words coming from the Ladies Man of BTS, WUK. You are supposed to be our guiding light, our inspiration, He Who Gets Women!

Originally posted by superevoman
Are some people bound to be alone? it seems that i am bound to be alone forever, i am not trying to sound emo or anything but its the truth. the ladies just dont seem interested enough to even talk to me. i mean, im not like a movie star or anything but im not the elephant man either. am i alone in this? i need help before i am overcome by the crushing loneliness! lol =-(

Well, there are people that needs to be alone or chose to be alone, but not necessarily lonely.

Er, usually, guys do the first move to talk to the lady. Were you expecting them to make the first move? If so, you're not getting anywhere.

reply to post by TKainZero

Thats true about the store, and the bank too btw. You need to become content with yourself before you will ever meet someone worth being with. If not having someone is getting you down then there's something deeper you need to deal with. Most women dont want an appendage. It ties into the "when youre not looking" deal. If youre content with yourself and happy, that confidence and happiness will attract someone and you wont even be trying. Thats just how it goes man.

reply to post by Toromos


women are weird though, cause some of them think that if you dont pay them a certain amount of attention, that you dont care for them. and honestly some women want to know damn near everything about you lol.

reply to post by MrdDstrbr


Sorry my friend, but women are an enigma, I don't think any man can figure them completely out. If one did, I am sure the allure of women would be gone forever.

superevoman

To be alone isn't a bad thing, think of the headaches that can be avoided by not bothering with the female gender. (Yes I know us guys aren't exactly headache free ladies)

A piece of advice that I got once that I found to be good advice is, if you can take care of a houseplant and a pet for one year, you are ready for a relationship. If not, you are missing an important aspect of yourself that you should examine and determine why first before trying to engage into a relationship.

It seems that women in general go for the strong, silent, mysterious types. Those that instill a slight sense of fear or wonder into them. Women seem to like guys that know what they want, are confident enough to go get it and aren't afraid to not pull the proverbial punch once and a while. (I am talking metaphorically here, I don't reccomend actually hitting a girl, unless that's the kind of kinky shes into, but we won't go into that here)

I think it may go back to base survival of the fittest instinct. Remember dating is a mating ritual, women want to choose the best mate and they have certain criteria that they follow in choosing someone to share their time with.


[edit on 8/4/2008 by whatukno]

Nothing wrong with not being in a relationship.
Society dictates too much how you "Should' be living to be classed as "Normal".
To hell with that.
My cat is my best friend. He never argues, never tells me what to do, or where to go. I don't have to try to figure out if I'm meeting his needs or not.
Just food and attention, brings love. That's all I need.

Originally posted by superevoman
Are some people bound to be alone? it seems that i am bound to be alone forever, i am not trying to sound emo or anything but its the truth. the ladies just dont seem interested enough to even talk to me. i mean, im not like a movie star or anything but im not the elephant man either. am i alone in this? i need help before i am overcome by the crushing loneliness! lol =-(

a friend of mine told me one time girls are only cool sometimes.

Well I've been "alone" now for about 8 years.

Some people can deal with this kind of situation, some can't.

Wether self induced or from unlucky situations, the best thing to do is...

Have fun with yourself for a change.

After all, if you want to meet someone, they would want to meet a happy person and not someone "needy".

Being single or celibate can have amazing freedom and can be a real insight into yourself.

For more info on being celibate, have a look at THIS thread that I started some time ago, I think you'll be surprised at just how positive things can be.

Also, being single doesn't have to be permanent. Some people can't live without the love and support of another to help them feel things are OK but....

Two semi-circles meeting DON'T make a complete circle, but two circles can make a complete LINK.

ps...I don't get lonely unless I miss my family and I am a firm believer that "lightening can strike!"....if it does I'll be clear headed and ready to be my best.

Be a complete circle....Good luck superevoman,



[edit on 7/8/2008 by nerbot]

Originally posted by Question Fate

women are weird though, cause some of them think that if you dont pay them a certain amount of attention, that you dont care for them. and honestly some women want to know damn near everything about you lol.

Most women (imo) ask questions, lots and lots of questions about absolutely everything.

Men think quietly! (retreat into cave).

Relationships....warts 'n all! :bnghd::bash:

reply to post by whatukno


funny song, i can relate

a reply to: superevoman

Hey! came across this thread in the search I know its from 2008 so I am curious, Have you found someone since? I am beginning to think the same thing

a reply to: superevoman

I hope not lol!!

My wife died in 2010 I was married to once ..to her. Since she died ..I did the "greave a lot thing", for awhile. Then went to bars and pubs. Then stopped that ..$$$ lol!! my god that can cost!!

Then signed up for facebook. I won't go into that crap..still I get myself into messes on there to this day..hahaahha!

I met last Oct 1st on my birthday a woman on ATS and that lasted the longest..10 months ..just up to recently I was willing and ready but she kept changing her mind. long story I won't go into.

I won't give up. I just think I have been looking for love in all the wrong places. Hey, is that a song



Everyone handles being alone differently. After I was married so long.. I was just out of practice. I just need to go with the flow ..and be myself. Heck what can I say??