My Journey

Below is a copy of an email I sent my family. Ive been sending them emails about conspiracy subjects in the hopes that they might wake up. I finally had to break down and explain why I started my research...

My journey to opening my eyes began in December of 1989

I was training as a sniper in the US Army. I had been sent to Panama to complete jungle school training. All snipers receive secondary training in a climate school. I had requested mountain training at Ft Drum, New York because I love the cold and hate snakes. The Army of course sends me to jungle school.

One late night Im awakened to the sounds of my platoon sgt screams to get up. I figure its another exercise drill so I go along with it. This time though we not only gear up, we are loaded onto chinook helicopter. We fly for about an hr in complete blackout conditions which is unusual as it can be dangerous. Finally our platoon leader some snot-nosed Captain speaks up. We're informed that we are at war with the govt of Panama.

Our mission briefing was simply kill anything that approaches our position. We are to secure a bridge that enters/exits a town. We are told this town harbors a major drug drug lord and perhaps thousands of armed militia loyal to General Noriega the current President of Panama.

We repel out of the chopper into a river. We stealth approach the bridge. There are no guards or soldiers of any kind around. I found it odd when we went topside to take the bridge that a local waved at us. He looked like he had just finished fishing from the bridge. Our platoon sgt ordered us to open fire and we killed the old guy.

We radioed in that we had control of the bridge. Maybe 5 minutes later several AH64 attack helicopters flew overhead into town. We heard several explosions and saw many fires break out. A few minutes later several uniformed men began to run towards us. We opened fire and killed them all. I think they might have been policemen.

Throughout the night we were approached by civilians trying to flee town. Anything that got within 100 yards was killed. This went on for hours. Finally the townspeople stopped trying when the bodies began to pile up.

By daybreak we had armored support take up our position. We were ordered to enter the town and do a clean-up door to door sweep. We were looking for General Noriega.

Clearing building is dangerous work. Our platoon sgt says screw this we'll smoke anyone out. We fire grenades from our M203 rifles into a building which starts a fire. We did this to most buildings to avoid having to enter them. I have no idea how many died but it must have been hundreds, maybe thousands because nobody ever made it out.

This went on throughout the day. I remember a corporal asking the platoon sgt if we were going to get into trouble over this. He responded they did far worse than this in Vietnam and nothing came of it and did we think this was the only town being secured.

That evening we went to a temporary base that had been set up called Tent City. It literally was just tents. I remember while eating in the mess tent listening to a Major bitch at our Captain that if we hadnt burned the whole dam town down that we would have had better quarters to sleep in.

The next morning we were told we were going on a mission of utmost importance. It was only my squad that was going so we said our goodbyes to the platoon not knowing where or what would be happening. We were told the town wasnt exactly secure so this would be dangerous. We were to be dropped rooftop onto a building and that we must secure this building.

We repelled onto the roof where a suit was waiting on us. He was CIA or at least that was what he told us. The building was a Bank that had been looted and ransacked by Noriega's mercs.

4 of my squad stayed topside, I was deployed at the entrance with one other and 2 went inside. We were given instructions on who to let in and who to shoot. I remember thinking how strange it was to be getting orders from a CIA man as he wasnt part of my chain of command.

Throughout the day we let in several suits, some were CIA while others were members of the Chase-Manhatten Bank (the owners I was told of the building). This went on for 4 days. At night we slept into the building. The CIA men would bring us Mcdonalds or Burger King for all our meals.

After 4 days, we were picked up by a humvee and told the war was over and that the new govt would be maintaining control now. We went back to our base to resume training and daily bull#. A week after being back we received a debriefing. It was short and sweet, dont talk to the press if approached and dont write home about what went down.

A month later maybe and I was ordered to a formation. Myself and several others received achievement medals and was told how many confirmed kills we had. I was told I had 17 confirmed kills which i remember thinking how the hell did they come up with that number. The numbers were bogus, a lot more died than what we were confirmed to have killed I can assure you.

My friends and I didnt really talk much about the events in Panama but we knew something wasnt right about it. It wasnt this hollywood type feeling of we kicked the bad guys asses. Most of the folks we killed didnt have weapons or uniforms.

As the years went by, I started to do research. I learned several things that have changed my life.

For starters, the bank I was guarding was formerly owned by Chase Bank system. It was alleged to have been part of a vast drug money laundering operation in Panama. To stop the reported 450 billion dollar drug laundering happening in his country, Noriega nationalized the banks. In other words he took control of them to stop illegal activities destroying his country.

From there its easy to assume what happened. The bank owners, ie rockefeller and morgan families complained to the govt and in we went. The banks were placed back in control of the chase banking house and the laundering of drug money resumed.

I murdered innocent people so a dirty banking elite group could get back control of their bank.

I remember coming home on leave once, it might have been after the gulf war. By then I was totally disillusioned to what my country was doing. As I sat in the car with mom,my step-dad and some family friends I recall someone saying "you must be so patriotic" I blurted out "# the United States" --- continued

reply to post by admriker444


It made me sick to think the people in the car with me considered the USA the good guys when I knew better.

By the time my discharge was approaching I had stopped following orders and drank quite a bit. I got drunk every night so I could sleep. I ended up getting court-martialed and booted from the Army not that I really cared by then. Thanks to my wife getting me on anxiety meds I do handle life better now but I still dont sleep well. Hell I think most of these emails Ive written were at 4am.

Ive continued my research. I learned that I was exposed to toxic chemicals that were illegally burned on the base where I was stationed in Nevada. There was a lawsuit but once again the govt wiggled its way out of it. National security says the judge and dismisses the class action lawsuit. Many of my friends are dead from exposure, getting weird forms of cancer that are extremely rare. I stopped following the website that tracked what happened to them and their families because the website was removed.

Im constantly watching my body now for any signs. I had a strange cyst on my foot appear last year that I had removed. The doctor thinks it might have been caused by an injury to the joint near it but he was unsure. It was benign thankfully.

Ive seen the reports about the so-called mysterious gulf war syndrome. Everyone who served in Iraq knows exactly what it is. They dont issue lead bullets anymore. Ammunition is now made from depleted uranium. The govt denies any reports of thousands of gulf war vets dying from this exposure. I just want to scream at the top of my lungs to the public..."dont you #ing morons remember Agent Orange and the 30 years of denials before the govt came clean ???" Thankfully I havent gotten sick from it as far as I know.

I have learned to stop trusting the media. I know they lie. Its nothing more than propaganda. I have seen the news clips on google and ytube about the invasion of Panama. I saw very little truth in what they reported.

I know the govt lies thanks to the deception in Panama, Iraq and Nevada.

Ive learned that history keeps repeating itself. Panama wasnt the 1st time our govt has interferred with another nation when it didnt play ball with corporate interests. Guatemala, Iran, Panama, Haiti, Afghanistan, Iraq, and several african nations to name just a few. Gautemala is particularly disturbing as 80% of the entire nation's lands were owned by United Fruit company. The elected leader nationalized those lands, you can guess what happened next.

Heck this wasnt even the 1st time we interferred in Panama. Back in 1903 we were negotiating with Columbia to build the canal. Columbia's parliment rejected the treaty because their constitution forbade giving away territory to another nation. I mention this because ironically their constitution was modelled after ours ! With US support and a paid militia of mercs Panama became independent of Columbia shortly after and construction of the canal began.

This is where I end my tale. Odd that I feel good getting this off my chest. Ive never told this to anyone except my step-father's dad completely before.

My warning still stands. There are a lot of scary simularities to the events in Germany before WW2 and whats happening here now in this country. There is a movie you all should watch because it really reminds me of whats happening now. Its called The Running Man and the similarities are scary. Citizens are being lulled to sleep with violent entertainment and completely unaware of the war raging behind the curtain against them.

Wow, I dont know wether to trust you or not, I guess if your telling the truth, then good on you. Keep it up.

[edit on 12-1-2008 by _Phoenix_]

reply to post by admriker444

Thank you for sharing your story. I hope you can eventually put it far enough behind you to settle your nerves.

What comes to mind is that we have a volunteer army. Anyone thinking of committing themselves to military life must understand that war is not a bed of roses. War is the pit of hell. We have had wars since the beginning of time, we are at war with many governments it just isn't declared war. As long as man is alive on this earth we will have wars.

I don't know if the USA is the greatest country in the world as I haven't had time to visit all the countries. But it is my country and I will stand and defend it with my dieing breath.

Our leaders are human. They make some bad judgement calls. We don't understand when our soldiers have to kill women and children. We are not privy to the knowledge that causes disgusting things to happen.

It's a dirty job, but it has to be done. God bless our military men and women.

Originally posted by dizziedame
Our leaders are human. They make some bad judgement calls. We don't understand when our soldiers have to kill women and children. We are not privy to the knowledge that causes disgusting things to happen.

It's a dirty job, but it has to be done. God bless our military men and women.

I have read some weird #### here on ATS, but this i just can't bend my mind around.

Are you being serious here or was this some weird attempt at sarcasm?

[edit on 13/1/08 by deezee]

reply to post by admriker444


THX for being so open and honest about your experiences, though you must know that you're endangering yourself by sharing them. This is the unfortunate reality we live in. The ruthless and amoral rule the world, and most get fooled into doing their bidding. Just be thankful that you're smart enough to admit the truth to yourself, and brave enough to share it.

I know it's probably little I can say of consilation to your ordeal, but I feel it is my duty as an American to thank you profoundly for being one of the noble warriors willing to put yourself on the line in the interest of National Sercurity.

I'm at the point of weeping about some things you have shared with us here, but at the same time I know we all have to be mentally strong in the face of adversity in this crazy mixed up world.

I also understand to an extent why everything in the country is designed to pull attention away from the War and other military actions. It's a sad state of affairs, but those of us who look beyond the hype need to stand in solidarity - even if it's just to preserve the true American spirit we still hold dear in our hearts.

I know it's a rough road out there, but you sir, are a fine example of our Nation's Finest. You have my highest respects, and if I were able to bestow higher honors, I would do so in a heartbeat.

May God continue to watch over you and your loved ones.

I have a brother-in-law that was also on the front line in Panama, To this day he won't discuss what happened there.

The Running Man is in my DVD collection

I hope things get better for you, for all of us....

wupy

Wow, that's an amazing story bro. Sounds like going through that kinda stuff could really mess up your mind, good to hear you've stayed strong through it all.

So um, what do they have out there in Area 51/Dreamland?

I am sorry I just had to call bull# on this post...I mean hey your a great writer and all but you wernt in the army...

"Ive continued my research. I learned that I was exposed to toxic chemicals that were illegally burned on the base where I was stationed in Nevada." -OP

There are no army bases in Nevada...But let me guess you were an elete sniper that just goes whereever needed right? Just like the movies...lol...I think you got the whole burning toxic gases from area 51 which did happen I believe...but not to you...OH WAIT!! Were you at Area 51!?!!?!?!? You must have been that elete sniper at Area 51 I heard so much about...I mean seriously dude stick to writing and leave the memory of real military vets to the real military vets...I mean hey if you can actually prove any of this I will be more than happy to retract my statement with an apology...Its just the way you carry your conversation and the way you name things like ah64 attack choppers...I mean I would have said a couple of apaches flew in overhead...It just seems you did a lot of reading and now claiming it all happened to you...Just my thoughts...

reply to post by deezee

No I am not being sarcastic. I'm being realistic. I was a teenager when the Vietnam war started. I remember my friends going to war and coming home telling stories of having to kill children and women or be killed themselves. Every night the news programs would give an enemy body count as well as our loses. After graduating high school I entered college and promptly dropped out to protest the war.

Mr. Deezee freedom does have a price. And we do have relative freedom in the USA. Sometimes you have to fight fire with fire. We will always have to defend our shores. And it is a dirty job and yes, somebody has to do it.

Mr. Deezee I don't speak Russian and I don't want to have to learn. How do you plan to keep my country from being taken over by Russia or another power?

I

Originally posted by dizziedame
Mr. Deezee I don't speak Russian and I don't want to have to learn. How do you plan to keep my country from being taken over by Russia or another power?

What does keeping your country from being invaded by Russia have to do with speaking Russian?

Or for that matter, what does it have to do with killing women and children?

For some strange reason, i can't make any sense whatsoever from what you're saying.

Originally posted by jimmyjackblack
Wow, that's an amazing story bro. Sounds like going through that kinda stuff could really mess up your mind, good to hear you've stayed strong through it all.

So um, what do they have out there in Area 51/Dreamland?

I wasnt stationed at Area 51. There are several military installations in Nevada. I think about 80% of the entire state is owned by the govt.

The site was called Sierra Army Depot. Technically it was in Herlong, California but that was just a post office really. The site extends well into Nevada just north of Reno Nevada.

The site itself isnt a secret, you can see the lights from the installation from Reno. What they do out there is classified though.

Sites such as this dont throw their garbage out like civilians do. Their afraid someone might go through it and learn a thing or two. So they burn it in violation of EPA rules. This happened at a lot of sites in the area. We were a part of the class action lawsuit along with folks from area51 and another site in Nevada.

And yes its a common installation for snipers to get stationed at. Guard tower duty bleh. I got lucky and got certified as a JSIIDS monitor though...Joint Services Interior Intrusion Detection System.

Getting assigned to places like that though is like a death sentence. There is no cable tv. No Blockbuster to rent movies. No entertainment whatsoever really. The only thing to do was to hit the NCO club and drink. Reno was an hr and a half drive and there wasnt a lot of down time to go there anyway.

I soon lost my clearance to work the site because of my drinking. Not that I cared.

Panama was a real eye-opener for me. I went into the service as a patriot and left bitter and disgusted with my country. And not just because of what I had to do there but because of my govt's actions. There was no congressional declaration of war. The President simply acted on his own in clear violation of the Constitution. And all so the Rockefeller clan could get back their dirty drug laundering bank

[edit on 14-1-2008 by admriker444]

[edit on 14-1-2008 by admriker444]

reply to post by dizziedame


You do realize Russia (and more specifically, Communism) was only a threat to US multi-national Corporate interests and the overall Global Process of Capital Accumulation, right?

Supposedly, Communist Russia's "undemocratic" government was such a threat, the US had to roll in wherever left policies would pop up/ But successive US administrations have supported (through AID packages, monies, direct military involvement, and other persuits) the worst dicatators, despots, and undemocratic governments this world has seen. With this in mind, can you really say Communist Russia's Un-democratic stance was what threatened US interests?

No i dont think so.

What was a threat to US interests was the class order. Who got to "skim the cream"* Or in other words, who got to reap the benefits of an exploited labour class. The fact that under communism, the common citizen (the worker) had more power than those that "owned" a company is what scared those with vested interest in capitalism.

Every battle fought in the name of "freedom" is really fought in the name of "freedom to exploit." Its class war, it always has been and it always will be.


To the OP: I wont attempt to debate the veracity of your claims because I lack the applicible military knowledge. But I do have to say, If your story is true, I hope you find peace with what you struggle with. And thankyou for sharing.

If you really feel like you've opened yourself to the way this world works, take a look at the world events around and during the time of the Yugoslavian conflict. Specifically look at Angola and Mozambique.

[edit on 14-1-2008 by InSpiteOf]

reply to post by InSpiteOf
I am a capitalist as were my parents and their parents. I come from a long line of folks that worked hard in their own businesses that existed solely to supply our families with their needs and to accumulate capital. I raised two children who are very successful in their own businesses.

Practicing capitalism made it possible for me to retire at 60 and enjoy life.
However I enjoyed every breath of life I have ever taken. I live each day as if tomorrow may not come. I have lived under the threat of war and our country being attacked since the 50's. I remember the Bay of Pigs and WW3 looming down on us at that time.

Long Live Capitalism ( it creates jobs and puts food on our tables).

reply to post by deezee
Deezee if the OP is truly relating a true story he has come away from it a disillusioned man. He cannot fathom a government that could/would kill villagers, old men, women , children. He spoke of the old man by the bridge that was gunned down by our troops.

I do not want Russia or any other government taking over our country. Using Russian and having to change languages was simply an example to illustrate my point.

Mind the gap.

reply to post by admriker444

Classified eh? Can you say what it was? Or maybe point us in the right direction? Maybe there's a movie that has something similar to what happened out there in it?
I have a friend who had a high security clearance for HAARP, he told me what that program was for (don't know if anything on it has been declassified, but he didn't tell me anything i didn't already know).
So did ya'll work with Aircraft, Human Experiments, Alien Experiments? Maybe ya'll did human experiments that resulted in possible contamination when ya'll tried to burn the bodies. Am I even close?

Originally posted by dizziedame
I am a capitalist as were my parents and their parents. I come from a long line of folks that worked hard in their own businesses that existed solely to supply our families with their needs and to accumulate capital. I raised two children who are very successful in their own businesses.

So you have no problem with world wide exploitation in the name of maximum profits? If you were the head of Gerber Baby Foods, would you have taken Guatamala to the World Trade Organization (court) for banning your product (baby formula) because it lacked the nutrional value of mothers milk? Would you sacrifice those kids for profits? Would you move your business oversea's to maximize profits?

How far are you willing to go to support your system?


"Great Wealth Creates Great Poverty"*

Practicing capitalism made it possible for me to retire at 60 and enjoy life.
However I enjoyed every breath of life I have ever taken. I live each day as if tomorrow may not come. I have lived under the threat of war and our country being attacked since the 50's. I remember the Bay of Pigs and WW3 looming down on us at that time.

And what if that threat of war was only to force you into consumerism and patriotic fervor in the name of economic imperialism? Would you still support a system that showed you the faces of those it murdered in the name of private profit?

Long Live Capitalism ( it creates jobs and puts food on our tables).

No, labour puts food on your table, consumerism creates jobs. Captalism does nothing on its own but exploit class interests. If there was no disorganized labour, Capitalism would fail.

Long Live The People (they do the work and put food on their table).


*=Quote by Michael Parenti.

[edit on 15-1-2008 by InSpiteOf]

reply to post by jimmyjackblack


Actually I have no idea what went on there. I worked a guard tower for a few months until I got certified to work the JSIIDS system. Before I left I had to sign a document saying I wouldnt disclose classified info for 50 years anyway.

There were rumors of things happening but I have no direct knowledge of anything.

Here is the base website if your interested (not that there is any classified info there)

www.sierra.army.mil...

Here is one of the pits where they burned stuff in violation of EPA rules...

www.sandia.gov...

They would burn everything from trash to old munitions to classified stuff. The wind would blow the smoke all over the facility. This went on quite a bit.

Here is a link to the lawsuit. The Army claims it has now stopped burning stuff in open pits. I doubt its true that theyve stopped though. It says they can still burn stuff in an emergency (whatever that means)

www.nelconline.org...

reply to post by InSpiteOf
Capitalism generally refers to an economic and social system in which the means of production are predominantly privately[1][2] owned and operated for profit, and in which investments, distribution, income, production and pricing of goods and services are determined through the operation of a market economy. It is usually considered to involve the right of individuals and groups of individuals acting as "legal persons" or corporations to trade capital goods, labor, land and money (see finance and credit).

Just looked over my post and didn't see the same things you saw. However, I will address your assumptions even though we have gotten off topic. If you wish to continue this debate further I will make a new thread we may do so.

I have not nor would I ever cause harm to come to anyone in my capitalist endeavors. Never sacrificed any children. The only effects my capitalism had on other countries was when I used my hard earned capital to purchase food, clothing and medical supplies and travel to third world countries and build housing, toilets and treat the sick. No, we did not use experimental drugs, we used the standard drugs used by all in the USA.

I have seen the faces of the children dead or dieing. I would never condone such action. I have held babies in my arms that would not live another year. I have seen the effect of misused capital by large corporations.

Many people benefited from my business ventures and still do.

I am not a proponent of unions, forced labor or the harming of anyone. My family came to the USA from Germany by way of England in 1734. Not one member of my family ever accepted even one cent of charity. We worked, we created jobs, we housed and fed people. And that same spirit continues today with my two children and seven grandchildren. The grandchildren work with the parents.

Now, if you wish to discuss the plight of admriker444 I will be most happy to do so. I will not continue to derail his OP.