death in dreams

well, to get started on a blunt note, people die in my dreams. a lot. if it was just random people, that wouldn't be so bad...but it's just the people i care about. i mean, parents, siblings, grandparents, close friends, boyfriends...they all die. it gets pretty gorey and flat out terrifying. and it's always triggered by they telling me they hate me.
example: last night, my boyfriend told me he hates me, and turned to walk away, where he immediatley got hit by a train.
and the most disturbing part is that it's not always just them dying...it's not uncommon for me to kill them.
another example: my grandpa was yelling at me, then said he hated me, so i pulled out an axe and killed him...my grandpa is one of my favorite people on the planet...so it's hard for me to understand a possible meaning for it...
things like this happen all the time. like atleast 4 times a week. and it bothers me soo much...
normal? maybe attachment issues in me? am i mentally disturbed?
im just confused, and looking for answers
anyone have one?

You are not mentally disturbed. Dreams of loved ones dying are very common. Keep in mind that dreams do not represent literal events in the waking world in almost all instances.

Dreams of people close to us dying represent changes in the way we view our relationship with that person. Old views of that person are "passing away" and new views are replacing them.

Alternatively, it can mean that you are lacking an aspect in yourself of that person that you admire. Think about what you find special about this person or what you admire in them.

Dreaming about murdering people you love can symbolize worries about hurting that person in waking life, perhaps by disappointing them with a choice you've made, or something similar. Repeated dreams of killing the same person can mean you are angry or frustrated with them in some way.

You may also be trying to put an end to an aspect of yourself that you see in that person when awake.

It sounds to me you have a very intense emotional life, and you have some internal issues you are working on having to do with changing yourself. You may be having difficulty accepting these changes, which is why you are having these dreams frequently.

But they don't make you a murderer or a bad person. Remember that what happens in your dreams is symbolic and most of the time has to do with something going on inside yourself. The characters in the dream usually represent aspects of you, not the person they look like.